


100 lotf minifics

by queencrank



Category: Lord of the Flies - William Golding
Genre: Alternate Universe - 1920's, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Space, Alternate Universe - Titanic, Anthology Piece, Bad Shakespearean English, Bank Robbery, Birthday Sex, Blindfolds, Blood Kink, Bondage, Bottom!Jack, Cheating, Crack, Cuddling, Daddy Kink, Dancing, Dirty Talk, Drug Addiction, Druggie!Jack, Extremely Dubious Consent, F/F, Filming, First Time, Fluff, Friends With Benefits, Hate Sex, Jealousy, Kidnapping, Kissing in the Rain, Knifeplay, Lapdance, Long-Distance Relationship, Lunar Eclipse, M/M, Marriage, Mermaids, Movie Night, Overstimulation, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Possessive Sex, Praise Kink, Religious Guilt, Religious Imagery & Symbolism, Rough Sex, See the chapter for any warnings, Sharing a Bed, Shower Sex, Stockholm Syndrome, Travel, Vampires, Wall Sex, vine references
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-03
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2018-09-27 10:54:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 62
Words: 133,670
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10016510
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/queencrank/pseuds/queencrank
Summary: exactly what the title saysnot all will be smut, but the rating is a general statement





	1. I.i

**Author's Note:**

> was gonna come up with a more clever title  
> but nah

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> starting things off with some bittersweet smut as the beginning of a long distance au i will definitely revisit in the future, but probably in a standalone fic so i can expand, explore, and be extra.

It's getting late when Jack's phone rings, the sun barely below the horizon. Jack pushes his binder off his chest and forgets about revision when he sees the caller ID.

'Hey,' He stretches, then folds an arm behind his head. Ralph hasn't even replied, and a fond smile is already plastered on his lips.

'Jack,' Ralph's voice cracks as though he's been crying, or he's about to start, 'Are you busy?'

'No. What's wrong?'

'Can you come over? I... We need to talk.' Jack's heart is in his throat as he pockets his phone, pulls his jacket on, and hops out his bedroom window. He's glad that his house is only one floor.

 

He barely knocks when Ralph's opening the door, eyes reddened and filled with tears. He pulls Jack across the threshold, then drags him up the stairs and into his room.

'What's wrong?' Jack murmurs as soon as the door is closed and locked, holding the shorter boy by the waist, hands barely brushing the soft cotton of his shirt.

'I... I failed French.'

'What? How?'

'According to my dad's standards, anything below an 80 is a fail, especially in the off season, and... I got a 71.' Jack's heart plunges into his stomach, and he knows what's coming. Or he thinks he does.

'So are you grounded or something? Can't see me?' His fingers tighten over Ralph's sides. Ralph sniffles, and shakes his head.

'No. It's worse.'

'Tell me, baby.'

'Um, w-well, my father has always threatened to send me to live with my grandparents, ever since my mother died. But, y'know, I never really... Gave him a reason to actually do it. And I always thought he was just bluffing,' Ralph wipes his nose on his sleeve, then leans into Jack.

'He wasn't bluffing. He said that... there are too many distractions here.' Jack swallows thickly - it couldn't be bad, could it? As long as he was still in England, they could still see each other on weekends.

'O-okay, we can manage that. What, do your grandparents have a farm somewhere or something?' Ralph looks up at him, looking about 2 seconds from crumbling into ugly crying at his feet.

'No. They live in America, Jack. New York.' Jack freezes, and this is much, _much_ worse than Ralph getting grounded.

'Oh,' He manages, voice weak. He pulls back, and sits on the bed. Ralph sits beside him, and leans his cheek on Jack's shoulder, rubbing up and down his arm.

'Yeah.'

'When... When do you leave? When do you come back?'

'I leave on Saturday. And... Summer, if my grades go up.'

'If... they don't?'

'I'll stay, do my senior year over there, I suppose.' Panic wells in Jack's throat at the suggestion that he might not get to see him physically for a year and a half.

'We only have one week before...' Ralph nods, sniffling.

'I know,' Silence settles, and Jack holds him close to his side.

What the fuck was he supposed to do now?

 

Friday rolls around way too quickly, and for the entire day, Jack doesn't leave Ralph's side, except for when they happen to not share a class. During that period, he's jumpy and irritable, and he's glad it's just a study period. He chews his nails down until they're tender, and glances at the time every other second, knee jiggling.

As soon as the bell rings, Jack is standing up, slinging his bag over his shoulder. He walks down the hall briskly, and turns the five required turns it took to get to his last class. Ralph is already there, waiting by the door, and Jack reaches him quickly, grasping his face in his hands and kissing him firmly.

'Jack,' Ralph pushes him away gently as students push past them, giving the two lingering glances, 'people will talk.'

'I don't care. I love you.'

'I know. I love you, too. But, please, Jack. Not here, alright?' Jack nods, lets go of him, and slips into the classroom.

They still hold hands under the desks, and Jack holds his hand tighter than he usually would, staring ahead and pretending to listen to the History teacher talk about aircrafts in World War II.  
The hour passes by excruciatingly slow, and Jack just wants to kiss Ralph, hold him, touch him. Spend time with him before he left for six months. Finally, thankfully, the final bell rings, and Jack tries not to leap into motion, pulling Ralph up.

Usually, they wouldn't hold hands. But enough people saw them kiss while going to their classes, and word spreads quickly. And Jack would be damned if he didn't hold his boyfriend's hand, even if he hadn't kissed him earlier.

He doesn't need to go to his locker, so he helps Ralph clean out his. The blond only sniffles twice, eyes bright with tears as he pulls down pictures and mementos from inside of the door as Jack ties the laces of his gym shoes together, stuffs them in a bag. Each time Ralph does sniffle, looking at a photo, Jack would lean over and give him a quick peck on the temple, rub his back reassuringly. Finally, the locker is emptied, and Jack slings the white trash bag over his shoulder.

'You don't have to carry it.' Ralph mumbles as he shoves his lock into his coat pocket.

'Yes, I do.' He holds out his hand, and Ralph takes it without hesitation as they walk out.

 

They leave their bags at the foot of Jack's bed, and sit on the hard mattress. Jack draws shapes on Ralph's thigh as the shorter boy convinces his father to stay over.

'Curfew shouldn't matter, Dad. It's Friday night, and I'll be-  
Yes, Dad, I understand, but-  
No, I'm not staying with Jack. I'm staying with Simon.  
Yes.  
I will.  
Alright. Yes.  
Goodnight.' Ralph is quiet for a moment when he hangs up, then forces a smile.

'I can stay over.'

'You can stay over at Simon's.'

'You know he wouldn't let me stay over here, not since he walked in on us.' Jack snorts, kisses his cheekbone.

'Of course. I'm just a distraction to your successful high school career.' Ralph laughs quietly, pulling him close.

'I'll miss you.'

'I know you will. How can you not?'

'Fuck you.' Jack kisses the top of his head, laughs into his hair.

'Why don't you?' Ralph pulls back, studying his expression.

'When does your mom get home?'

'She's working a double shift. She won't be home 'til morning. Besides, she doesn't care.' Ralph nods slowly, then slides into his lap. Jack brushes his hair from his face, and kisses him gently.

'You're so fuckin' pretty. It's ridiculous. I'm gonna miss looking at you.'

'You can still look at me.'

'Pictures and videos are't the same as the real thing. You're the prettiest thing I've seen. You're like a sunset, you know? Pretty in pictures, breathtaking in person.' Ralph purses his lips, pushes at his chest.

'Don't do that. Don't be sweet. I'll cry.' Jack ducks his head to kiss his Adam's apple, hiding his smile.

'What do you suggest I do, then? Call you names?'

'No. Just... Stop complimenting me.'

'Ralph, I plan to make this night sweeter than fuckin' honey.' Ralph laughs in a strange way, not forced but not happy either. Jack knows he's about to make good on his promise to cry, so he pulls away, and bites his lip.

'Let's take that school uniform off, baby. It doesn't do you justice.' Ralph lifts his arms above his head, letting Jack pull the school jumper off for him. Jack kisses his nose, then looks at the jumper balled in his hands.

'Can I keep this?'

'You're too tall. It'll be way short on you.'

'Not to wear. Just... Y'know. When it gets hard.' Ralph hesitates, then walks over to Jack's closet. He takes down his favourite shirt, and holds it close to his chest.

'I'll bring you something better when I leave for the airport, and I'll keep this.' Jack nods slowly, and Ralph folds the shirt, setting it onto the dresser. Jack drops the shirt, beckoning him to come back to the bed. Ralph stands just out of reach, slowly unbuckling his belt, and Jack grunts in frustration, leaning forward to grip him by the waist, pulling him forwards until their knees bump. He kisses his stomach, removing his belt and tossing it away.

'Don't do that, pretty boy.'

'Hm?'

'That bullshit where you strip for me. It's unbelievably sexy,' Jack nibbles at the skin just above the hem of his jeans, 'but you already drive me mad.'

'Do I?'

'Of course. You know this. I'm fuckin' addicted to you.'

'Jack, I said not to...'

'God, I'll miss this. Making you blush,' He unzips the fly of his jeans, watching Ralph push them down his thighs, 'You know what else I'll miss?'

'Me in general?'

'Well, yes, but I've got specifics.' Jack pulls Ralph's jeans down the rest of the way, then pulls him into his lap.

'Do tell.' Ralph whispers, fingers already in his hair.

'I'm gonna miss,' Jack drops his voice to a low murmur. Even though no one was around, Ralph was the only one who he wanted to hear his words, 'your face when you laugh. The way your eyes shine and your nose wrinkles,' Ralph helps him out of his own shirt, teeth digging deep into his lip, 'I'm gonna miss the way you sound when you're tired. And they way you hold things, like everything is made of wet paper,' Ralph's eyes have a glassy sheen, and Jack knows it's only seconds before the first tears will fall. But that doesn't matter, not when he's there to wipe them away.

'What... What else?' Ralph leans forward and kisses his shoulder as he blindly pulls his belt from the belt loops and opens his fly.

'Hm. I'll miss these little moles here,' Jack touches the one above Ralph's jaw, 'and here,' the finger trails down his chest until it lands on the mole that's slightly bigger, just to the left of his sternum. Ralph smiles, sniffles. Jack takes this opportunity to turn this back to what he had planned for the evening ; he'd fuck Ralph's brains out, then they'd eat supper, then they'd fuck again, gentler this time.

'You know what I'll miss most of all?'

'W...what?' Jack grins.

'This,' his grips the blond's rear so suddenly that he gasps and jumps, 'and the way my name sounds when you're moaning it. The way you come is a sight I enjoy too.' Ralph sniffles, then laughs while Jack awkwardly shimmies out of his pants without dislodging Ralph from his lap. The blond seems to lose himself in thought, and Jack stops, jeans bunched around his knees. He brushes some hair behind Ralph's ear, then takes his face in his hands, rubbing his thumbs at the corners of his mouth.

'Tell me what's going on in that pretty head of yours.' Ralph blushes deep, kisses one of his thumbs.

'I want to taste you. Just once. I can suck you off, you can come, then while we're waiting for you to recover, we can make out or something, I don't know. We have all night. I'm patient.'

'We don't have all night. We need to sleep and eat and stay hydrated.'

'I'll sleep on the plane. Please, baby, you've never come in my mouth before, and there won't be another chance until June.' Jack won't lie - the thought of the sight of Ralph on his knees with come on his lips was extremely appealing. He bites the inside of his cheek, then nods.

'Of course, beautiful. I can't say no to you.' Ralph grins in victory and slides off his lap and drops onto his knees on the rug that Jack had bought for this exact purpose. He pulls his briefs off, then sets his knees apart so Ralph can press close like he knows he likes.

The shorter boy holds his gaze evenly, lazily drawing patterns on the inside of Jack's thighs as he kisses along his hipbone.

'Love you.' He mumbles, then nips at the raised bone. Jack winces, but doesn't say anything. Instead, he runs his fingers through Ralph's hair and grips it tightly.

'I love you, too.'

'Promise?' Jack laughs as Ralph rubs his thumb over the spot he had bit.

'Yes, Ralph. Haven't you been listening?'

'Things change.'

'Not with me. I swear. I'm yours, Ralph. Always and only.' Satisfied with his answer, Ralph kisses the tip of his cock, taking it in his hand. It's all Jack can do to not thrust up into Ralph's mouth when his lips wrap around the head and he sucks. He tries pushing him down, but Ralph holds firm, raising a brow.  
Achingly slow, he takes more of him into his mouth until his lips are on his skin, and he's sliding back up equally slow. Jack hisses in pleasure and frustration, trying to hold still.

'Fuck, baby, all I wanna do is fuck that perfect throat of yours.' Ralph pulls back to reply, a thin strand of saliva hanging from his bottom lip to the tip of his cock.

'Overwhelmingly romantic, babe.' Jack grunts in response. Fuck romantic.

'Just... Go a bit quicker, yeah? Nothing romantic about barely moving.'

'It's called teasing. And it's absolutely romantic.' Although Jack doesn't say so, he adds moments like these to his ever-growing list of things he'd miss when there was an ocean between them.

Ralph smiles up at him in a way that tells him that he's thinking along the same lines, then returns to his task. Jack is glad when he picks up his pace, if only by a small, fractional amount. 

It takes a while, but eventually, Jack feels his climax mounting.

'Isn't your jaw sore?' He grits out. Ralph shrugs.

'Worth it.' He manages, mouth still half full. Suddenly, he plunges down until he coughs, and Jack takes the opportunity to hold him down and thrust up into his mouth gently until Ralph splutters and comes back up, breathing heavily.

'Fuck, Ralph, you're so good for me.' Jack whispers, and Ralph warms at the praise that is now a common occurrence. He pulls away to give his jaw a break, pumping Jack's spit-slick cock in his hand. He leans up, and kisses him and all Jack can taste is his precum on his tongue.

'Yeah?' Ralph whispers, goading more praise out of him. Jack follows, nodding quickly.

'F-fuck - yeah, baby, you take my cock so good. Perfect fuckin' mouth. You're such a good boy for me.' Ralph moans and kisses him again. Jack leans forward and plants a sweet kiss on each side of his aching jaw, and then sits back as Ralph sinks to sit on his feet.

He is teetering on the edge of his climax, and all it takes for him to let go, moaning Ralph's name low and long and hoarse, is for the blond to do the exact same thing he had done moments before, taking all of him into his mouth in one quick movement. Jack holds him down as he comes, hips twitching up into his mouth. Ralph gags on his come, pulling back and reaching for the box of tissues on Jack's bedside table.

'Wait,' Ralph pauses, mouth still full of Jack's seed, 'Show me.' Ralph opens his mouth, staring up at Jack. His sensitive cock twitches and he groans at the sight. Ralph spits the load into the tissue and throws it out, climbing back into Jack's lap, slinging an arm across his shoulder. 

'What did you think?'

'Would do it again. But don't hold me down so far next time - I almost choked.' Jack stares at his boyfriend for a long time, his face still flushed and the smell of him still heavy on his breath.

'Don't go.' He whispers, and Ralph clenches his jaw.

'Jack,'

'Please. You turn eighteen in what, eight months? Just stay. We'll get our own apartment.'

'It isn't that simple.'

'It could be. Please, Ralph.'

'My dad,'

'I'll fight him. I'll fight every single person on this goddamned planet to keep you here.'

'Jack, please.' Ralph's eyes are bright with tears. Jack kisses him, not caring how he still tastes like him.

'Ralph, I'm begging you.'

'I've already asked, hundred of thousands of times. He isn't budging.' Jack holds back a frustrated sigh and kisses Ralph's Adam's apple.

'Fuck him. Enough about your dad. This is about you. About us. I'll... I'll make you feel good, baby.' Ralph seems more than glad for the subject change and scoots off Jack's lap and onto the bed.

'Right. What did you have in mind?'

'How do you want it?'

'I don't know. Fuck, just touch me, Jack, I don't care how.' Jack hums, then pulls off Ralph's briefs for him, brushing his fingertips over the head, already pink and throbbing.

'I'll make you come so hard, baby.' Jack bites at his shoulder and palms at the swollen head gently, slowly. Ralph curses under his breath, tilts his head for more access. Immediately, Jack's teeth are set on his pulse point, and he sucks a mark into his neck. Ralph hisses, gently pushes on his chest.

'My dad'll see.'

'So? What's he gonna do, send you to America twice?' As if to prove a point, Jack does it again on the other side as Ralph weakly whines in protest.

'Jack...'

'Relax. They aren't that dark, they'll fade by tomorrow.' Ralph nods, fingers tight on his shoulder blades.

'Okay.' Ralph says, voice small, and Jack turns his attention to his shoulders to leave darker marks across the soft skin as his fingers wrap around his shaft and he pumps his hand slowly. Ralph moans, hips pushing up into his hand.

'Your moans are the prettiest fuckin' things I've ever heard. They put sirens' songs to shame.' Ralph nibbles at the shell of his ear, and moans again, quieter this time, and warmth rushes into Jack's still-sensitive cock, making him wince. He pumps his hand quicker, making sure to run his thumb over the head every time his hand went down. Ralph hisses in pleasure, pressing desperate kiss after desperate kiss into his hair.

'Just like that, keep doing that.' He whimpers, and Jack is more than happy to oblige, keeping his movements controlled and careful. Ralph's bitten nails scrape down his back, the short nails doing nothing but leaving pink scratches that would go down within the next half hour. He holds Jack close and bucks into his hand.

'Are you gonna come?' A quick nod from Ralph, and Jack kisses the spot below his ear, 'Come for me baby, let me hear those pretty moans of yours.' Ralph does as he's told, almost immediately spilling into Jack's knuckles as he sobs out his name, slumping into him. Jack strokes him until he whimpers, then lets him go, watching calmly as Ralph slumps back onto the pillows, spent.

'You want something to eat?'

'What about you? You're hard again.' Ralph's chest is heaving.

'And if I fuck you, you'll get hard again before you're ready to. Let's just order a pizza, then I can fuck you after, okay?'

'I feel bad leaving you like that.'

'It's not too bad. Just don't touch it - it'll go down.'

'Still,' Ralph murmurs, crawling back to his side and kissing his upper arm. Jack leans over to the bedside table and picks up his phone.

'What do you want on the pizza?'

 

An hour later, they've eaten and lie in Jack's bed naked, Ralph draped over his front in a now familiar weight, comforting and warm. Jack lazily runs his fingers up and down his spine, watching with faint satisfaction when Ralph shivers now and then.

'You said something about fucking me after we've eaten?'

'Ready for another round, are you?' Even with his taunting, he starts to stiffen practically immediately, and he flushes when Ralph grinds down on him, as if to point it out. Jack sits up and backs up against the headboard, and Ralph climbs on top of him, blindly grabbing for the lube kept in the drawer of his bedside table. He lifts himself up enough to coat Jack's length and his entrance, then sets it down as he sinks back, letting out a low groan. Jack wants to thrust into him, fast and hard, but holds out while Ralph shifts on top of him, finding a comfortable position.

After what seems like hours, Ralph rocks back and forth on him, hands pressed to his chest. Jack grips his hips, beginning to move in a pace that matches his.

'Don't,' Ralph stops cold and watches him closely, 'just stay still and let me do this for you.' Jack forces himself to hold still as Ralph fucks himself on him, slowly gaining speed. He lurches into him, breathing slightly too loud, too sharp through his nose. His eyes are closed, but Jack can't look away from his face as he slowly loses himself in this, holding him steady as he curves his spine and moves quicker, rolling his hips down as a quiet moan leaves his lips. Jack sits up and kisses his ribs, watching him fondly.

'This is a good look for you.' Ralph hums in reply, barely listening by now, picking up his speed all the more. By now, he moves just a little too slowly, too gently, just below what Jack would do to him if he let him. But it still felt good, which he enjoyed thoroughly, and the sight above him was the opposite of unappealing.

Ralph whispers his name over and over, nails digging into his chest, and Jack finds himself climbing to release at a steady pace.

'Ralph, baby,' He grips his hips more firmly, stilling the shorter boy's movements, 'look at me. Watch me come for you.' Ralph opens his eyes, breathing heavily.

'Fuck me.' He whispers, voice hoarse. Jack is more than happy to.

He has Ralph calling out his name in that hoarse cry as he thrusts up into him roughly, chasing his orgasm. Jack whispers praise into his ear, grip over his ribs bruisingly hard as he crashes over the edge. He spills into Ralph, slowing to a stop as he catches his breath. Ralph is gasping, hair wild and eyes unfocused, cock half hard again. Jack carefully lifts him off his cock and lies back down, kissing his hair.

'You were so good for me, baby, taking my cock so well.' Ralph hums, wrapping his arms around his waist and pushing his cheek into his chest.

'Love you, Jack.'

 

 

Ralph rouses him early the next morning, before the sun is up, and Jack tries to remember falling asleep. Ralph is dressed, holding his shirt in his arms.

'I'm going to Simon's so my dad can pick me up. I'll be around with a jumper before we leave for the airport.'

'The sun isn't even up yet.'

'My flight is early.' Jack sits up, rubbing an eye.

'C'mere.' Ralph slides back into bed, on top of his blankets. He kisses him softly, then kisses each of his eyelids.

'I love you, Ralph. So much. I've never loved anyone more, and I never will.' Ralph holds him close, quivering with sobs that are barely held in.

'I know. I love you too. I should go.' Jack pulls back, cradles his face, then lets him go.

'If you don't come by, I'll fly over to America and kidnap you. I'm not done saying goodbye.'

'Okay. I'll come by, I promise.'

 

Jack doesn't go back to bed - he gets dressed and sits in the kitchen, watching the sun rise.

It's barely above the buildings surrounding him when there's a soft knock on the door.

When he opens it, Ralph holds a dark red sweater, smiling shyly. He's showered recently, blond hair still damp, and Jack knows he's been crying - maybe he had said goodbye to his friends before dropping by. He wraps his arms around the shorter boy, holding firm. Ralph grips his shirt, fingers curled into an unfaltering fist.

'Please, Ralph.' Jack kisses the side of his head, and Ralph sobs into his shoulder.

'Don't, Jack. You know I haven't any choice.' Jack stares over his shoulder at his father, who sits in the car, looking absolutely bored. All he wants to do is beat his face in.

'Kiss me. Please.'

'We kissed earlier.'

'Do it again. I don't care who sees.' Ralph bites his lip, casting a glance over his shoulder. He then lifts into a kiss that is clearly meant to be nothing more than a peck on the lips. Jack is ready, holding him firm and kissing rough, all bending him down and burying his fingers into his hair. He pulls back, then kisses his forehead several times.

'I love you.' He whispers with every kiss, then hugs him until his father honks. He gives the man the finger, but pulls back nonetheless.

'Call me as soon as you land. Or text. Or something. Just... Let me know, somehow, that you got there okay, yeah?' Ralph nods, barely holding tears back. Jack gives him a little push on the shoulder.

'Go on. Don't want to keep your old man waiting.' Ralph thrusts the jumper into his arms, and hurries into the car. Jack watches him double over, shoulders shaking, as the sleek car peels out of his shabby driveway and whips down the road. He stays out until the car turns a corner, and all he can see are the squat houses around him.  
  


When he goes upstairs again, he slides the jumper on his pillowcase, glad to find that it smelt entirely like Ralph.

Only then does Jack allow himself to crumble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is abnormally long  
> the rest won't be NEARLY as long  
> i just got carried away


	2. II

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive flirted with the idea of writing bondage in the past, so lbr here, we all knew this was coming
> 
> basically, ralph handcuffs jack to the bed nd rides him. wow.  
> this is more pwp than the first one, but it still has like??? a lowkey plot i guess

Ralph closes one part of the silver handcuffs over Jack's wrist, pulling it back to press against the headboard.

'Is that too tight?' He murmurs, and Jack shakes his head, lifting his other wrist for Ralph to bind him to the frame. There's a clicking of metal as the handcuff closes. Jack tugs at his arms as Ralph sets the keys on the bedside table.

'Tell me if it hurts more than it should.' He hums, then taps on Jack's hips, wordlessly telling him to lift them from the bed. Ralph is already naked, has been since they stepped into the bedroom. The simple black briefs are pulled down and off, tossed across the room. There's the sound of the handcuffs straining against the bed frame, then Jack curses under his breath.

'Fuck Ralph, you're so goddamned pretty. I wanna touch you so bad.' Ralph raises a brow, rolls his hips down against Jack's growing hardness.

'I've barely done anything.' The handcuffs strain against the frame, so Ralph presses his wrists back, 'Don't break my bed, or I won't let you fuck me for a week.' Jack whines in protest while Ralph leans down, nibbles at his pulse point. He knows that he wants to grip his hips, push up into him, but he wants to go slow, wants to torture him until he's begging for release.  
He rakes his short nails down his ribs, making the redhead shudder and moan, staring up at him. He sits back, tracing the faint bags under his eyes.

'I think we should get a blindfold for you, baby, if my appearance is bothering you.' A quiet whine leaves Jack's parted lips, and he shakes his head, quickly and frantically.

'No, please. I love watching you ride me.' Ralph grins, leans down to bite at his Adam's apple.

'Beg.' He whispers, teeth still set, gentle, around his throat.

'Please, baby. You're so pretty with my cock in this ass,' The handcuffs clink when he moves to grip his rear, so Jack's hips push up against him, and Ralph moves down to kiss his collarbone.

'Try harder. I've kept my sleep mask.' Jack pushes his nose into his hair, elbows framing his face.

'C'mon, Ralph. I don't wanna miss seeing that. You always look so nice when you're moaning on top of me,' Ralph shifts so Jack can kiss his temple, moving his hips down against him, 'Please. Please, baby. I'll let you do anything else, please don't blindfold me.' Jack kisses his temple again and again until Ralph sits back, running his nails down his chest.

'Alright. Only if you're good.' Jack grins in relief, nodding vigorously.

'I'll be good. I'll be so good.' At his words, Ralph slides down his body to kneel between his legs, kissing his hipbones.

'Keep your hips on the bed, or this will stop and I'll go to bed.' He watches Jack until he nods, pressing his already-thin lips into a thinner line, then kisses the spot just next to where his cock rests on his abdomen. Jack gasps, hips twitching to the side, and Ralph immediately braces him with one arm.

'Strike one,' He murmurs, then kisses the top of his left thigh. Ralph taps the inside of his knees, and Jack bends them up so his legs frame Ralph's head. The shorter boy sucks dark marks onto the soft freckled skin of the insides of his thighs, and Jack releases a shaky breath when a feather-light kiss is brushed to his perineum. The handcuffs strain against the bedframe again as Jack makes a noise that's somewhere between a whimper and a moan, and Ralph looks up in warning.

There's the sound of metal sliding down metal as Jack settles his wrist on the pillow above his head, and heaves a sigh.

'If you're patient, I'll reward you.' Ralph hums, then traces his index finger down the throbbing vein on the underside of the taller boy's cock. Jack gasps, thigh twitching out, and Ralph is surprised his hips didn't move. He kisses the hollow of his right thigh in recognition and appreciation, then carefully wraps his hand around his shaft.

'Don't come before I tell you to.' He warns, then suddenly takes all of him into his mouth. Jack gasps, arms pulling forward as he presses his nose into the crook of his elbow. Ralph bobs his head slowly, watching Jack closely as he curses under his breath and gasps quietly.

'Fuck, Ralph, please let me touch you. I wanna touch you so bad, please baby.' In answer, Ralph pinches his hipbone hard enough for Jack to grit his teeth and shift under him. Ralph lets the movement of his hips go, but pulls back when his cock presses to the inside of his cheek, letting him settle, kissing the spot he pinched in apology.

Once Jack's hips have stilled, Ralph sucks at the head of his cock, stroking his shaft slowly. Jack whimpers, and when Ralph looks up at him, his teeth are dug so deep into his bottom lip that he fears he'll draw blood.

'Jack,' He murmurs, pulling back, 'Relax. I don't want you to bleed.' Jack opens his eyes, licking his swollen lip, nodding.

'Sorry,' He mumbles, eyes unfocused.

'Are you close?' He nods, cheeks growing pink. Ralph considers his options for a moment, then crawls up him to grab the keys from where he left them on the bedside table.

'I wanna go slow, so... I'll take care of myself while we wait for you to calm down.' Jack nods, leaning up.

'Kiss me first.' Ralph leans down, kissing the side of his mouth.

'I will once we've finished.' Jack makes a noise of frustration, wetting his lips as Ralph sits back, spitting on his hand and passing it over his length.

Jack chews on the inside of his cheek while he watches Ralph unravel inches away, and Ralph knows he wants to do it, knows he would take him apart so well and put him back together with soft kisses and softer words. But softness wasn't his to give, not tonight. He opens his eyes with great difficulty, and gives Jack a weak smile.

'I love seeing you like this, Jack.'

'How? Tell me, sweetness.' Although he was the one who was supposed to be in charge, Ralph's heart still catapults when Jack says this, and he figures Jack knows what the nickname does to him.

'All... All hot and bothered, _fuck_ , looking at me like I'm...' He moans, tries not to screw his eyes shut, '... like I'm the best thing to ever happen to you. Fuck, Jack, I love you so much.'

'You _are_ the best thing to happen to me, sweetness. Please, pretty boy, let me do this.' Ralph wants to, wants to grab the keys from where he left them on the bedside table, let Jack take him apart like he always does, whispering praise into his ear as he holds him close. He wants it so badly, but he resists, shaking his head.

'No. Just... Just talk me through it.' Ralph watches him through his lashes, and Jack sighs, then nods.

'Okay,' He shifts, wets his lips with his tongue again, 'How?'

'Say what you usually do. I can... I can do the rest.' Jack nods up at him, then swallows.

'You're so pretty Ralph. So fucking hot, touching yourself like that. This is gonna drive me mad, you know that? Not being able to touch you, make you feel good,' Ralph whimpers, free hand keeping him upright as he sways, 'I wanna touch you so bad. I would do what you're doing, but slower. Make you moan - your moans are so pretty, baby, I'd listen to you all day if I could - and whimper my name in that amazing voice of yours. I'd kiss you, soft like you like it, leave some marks on your neck for everyone to see that you belong to me.' Ralph moans, long and broken, steadily climbing up to climax. Jack's voice sinks to a gravelly whisper when he continues.

'Are you gonna come? Come for me, sweetness, let me see,' Ralph sinks his nails into his chest, past caring when Jack winces, his name a hoarse cry as he spills onto his neck and chest. He sits back, quivering, and reaches for the tissues, wiping the mess from his freckled skin with shaking hands. When he's close, Jack kisses his shoulder.

'You were so good, baby. I love you.' Ralph settles against him for a moment, letting him press his nose into the crook of his neck.

'We can stop here if you're too tired. You came pretty hard.'

'I wanna... I wanna make you feel good. Wanna ride you. Just... Lemme catch my breath.' Jack nods, kissing along his neck and ear as Ralph runs his fingers over his arms, drawing shapes on the dry skin.

About ten minutes of this passes, then Ralph pulls back, caressing Jack's cheek briefly before reaching for the bottle of lube. He slathers a good amount of it over his length, then sets the bottle on the bedside table beside the handcuff keys.

'Remember, you only have two strikes left. No moving your hips.'

'What happens if I get three strikes?'

'Don't you watch baseball?'

'Don't act like you watch it, babe.'

'Anyways, you're out. Or, three weeks without sex.'

'I already have one. Is that one week without it? Because we both know you won't last that long.'

'No. It's only a day. Which won't be the end of the world.' Jack hums, and Ralph moves back to line himself up with Jack's length. He steadies himself by bracing his hands on Jack's chest, sinking back slowly. He adjusts himself, holding completely still as he looks down at Jack, tracing his nails over his skin.

'What are you waiting for?' Jack manages, and Ralph grins down at him, rolling his hips so slow it could be mistaken for shifting.

'Waiting for you to beg.'

'You'll be waiting a long time then.'

'Then so will you.' Ralph says simply, moving his hips faster by a fraction of a second. He's surprised that Jack hasn't gotten frustrated and thrust up into him. He wants him to, wants him to lose control, even once, so he lifts up until only his head remains in him, threatening to fall free, and he grins down in victory when Jack clenches his jaw, pulls at his restraints, and he slowly slides back down. A sharp hiss of air leaves Jack, and Ralph runs his nails up his ribs.

'You gonna beg yet?'

'Nope.' Jack grits out, and Ralph shrugs, slowly pulling up again, ignoring the small noise of protest when he pulls away completely, digging his short nails into Jack's chest until pink, short curves are left behind.

'Ralph, _c'mon_.'

'I'm sorry? Who's in charge here?'

'You,'

'And who isn't?'

'Me,'

'So why are _you_ telling _me_ what to do, love? You're lucky you're so cute - I would get up if you weren't. The only way I'll go any quicker is if you beg.'

'Ralph,'

' _Beg_.' He sinks back down halfway, and Jack's hips twitch, more of instinct than anything else - so small that he probably didn't even notice, too small to punish. But it was a sign that his resolve was weakening, and his desire for release was trumping his immense pride. He strains against the restraints, almost growls up at Ralph despite the current power shift.

'If I didn't have these things on -'

'But you do, love.' Ralph bites at his sternum, slowly rocking up and down. Jack clenches his jaw.

'Will this be a one-time thing? The begging, I mean. I... It's a sign of weakness.'

'If you're good, sure.' The redhead sighs, shifting under him.

'Please. Please, Ralph, ride me. Ride me quick and ride me hard, I'll do anything if you just... Use me.' Ralph smiles, moves a smidge faster.

'That was good, baby. But... Not good enough. Sorry. Plan B.' Jack groans in frustration.

'And what's that?'

'Fuck you like this until all you can do is beg, or until the sun comes up. Whichever comes first.' He speeds up to a pace that Jack would call slow, leaning back and placing his hands back on his knees. Jack strains at the cuffs.

'Don't break the bed,' Ralph murmurs, happy to just fuck himself on Jack like this until he's too tired or too sore or he has to go to work, or all of the above. It's clear Jack has other opinions though, pressing his face into his upper arm and clenching his jaw.

'As soon as these cuffs come off, I'm gonna fuck you long and hard and rough, and won't stop until you've come again and can't remember anything but my name.' He growls, and Ralph grins. He can't wait.

 

Fifteen minutes crawl by, and Jack still hasn't begged any more, but he murmurs obscene things into his arm that gets Ralph hard again. He pulls back, and Jack gasps, lifting his face from his arms.

'No. Don't stop. Please.' Ralph grins at him, pulling all the way back. Jack's breath catches, and his wrists must be rubbed raw by now.

'Please, Ralph, God, don't stop. I can at least eventually get off,' A glance tells Ralph that his cock is red and throbbing, 'Please just... Fuck, I want you to be making those pretty noises as you ride me into oblivion.'

'Keep talking.' Ralph sinks back, slowly, and Jack sucks in a shaky breath.

'Please, Ralph. Make me feel good, plea-' His sentence ends in a long moan when Ralph moves quicker, holding his wrists as his eyes close.

'Move your hips. I can only do it so hard.' Immediately, Jack thrusts up into Ralph, somewhat awkwardly.

Soon, Ralph is moaning against Jack's neck as he fucks him as best he can with his hands shackled above his head, rocking back quickly. Jack chases his orgasm, kissing Ralph's hair.

'Can I come? Please, sweetness, let me come in you, let me fill you.' Ralph nods wordlessly, too busy moaning and cursing and calling his name. Immediately, Jack spills into him, and Ralph spills onto his stomach right after. He catches his breath, pulls away, then frees Jack with shaking hands, whole body quivering as he settles down against Jack.

'You should try that. It's torture.' Jack murmurs, rubbing at the red marks around his wrists. Ralph knows they'll be bruised tomorrow, and that he'll spend the next week kissing the bruises in apology.

'Maybe next time. But... Didn't you say something about fucking me until I can only remember how to say your name?' Jack laughs tiredly, kissing his shoulder as he slings an arm across his back.

'In the morning. I need to sleep first.' Ralph nods, stifling a yawn as he sits up. He puts away the handcuffs and lube, then takes out his lotion, rubbing some over Jack's wrists as he hums in thanks. Once he has treated the redhead's sore wrist, he settles down on top of him, and drifts off to a contented sleep. 


	3. II.ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jack returns the favor ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love bossy ralph soooo
> 
> also this is rlly gross nd fluffy nd the funny thing abt it is that i wrote it over a couple of days and you can tell that i didn't mean for it to be fluffy when i started but im too lazy to fix it

Ralph comes home from work to find Jack sitting on the couch, knees set wide, playing with the silver handcuffs. Ralph grins across the room, dropping his keys on the kitchen island as he walks across the space to stand between Jack's knees.

'Take off your clothes.' It's the first thing Jack says, and seems like the only thing he intends to say. He laughs, pulling the buttons of his work shirt free, sliding it off. Jack leans back, running his fingers over the cool metal of the handcuffs. Ralph pauses, pressing closer, and Jack raises a brow.

'What about you?'

'Don't worry your pretty little head about me. All of your clothes, off,' Ralph strips until he stands naked before Jack, 'Give me your wrists.' Ralph does as he's told, letting the redhead close the parts of the handcuffs around his wrists, tug at them gently. Jack kisses one of his palms, voice softer when he speaks again.

'Are you good with this? I know you don't like your hands bound.'

'I'm fine.'

'It's not uncomfortable? Doesn't hurt?' Ralph smiles despite knowing that Jack can't see his face, then laughs.

'No, Jack. Just do your thing. I'll tell you if you hurt me or if I don't like something.' Jack kisses the cuffs, then gently pushes him forward.

'You sure?'

'Yes.'

'I love you,' He sits back, 'Look at me, pretty boy.' Ralph does as he's told, awkwardly shifting on his knees until he looks up into Jack's eyes. Jack grips his face, kissing him roughly.

'You look so pretty on your knees. What do you want from me, sweet boy?' Ralph holds himself back when he gets the temptation to kiss back. Jack kisses his neck, then bites at his ear until he whimpers and flinches.

'Anything.'

'I need a better answer than that. You know I'll give you anything you ask me for. Let me worship you.'

'Fuck me. Touch me. Kiss me. You can be rough if you'd like - all I care about is your hands on me and your cock in me.'

'Is that all you ask for?'

'For now, yes.'

Jack kisses his hair, then pulls away, leaning back against the back of the couch, pulling his shirt off.  
Next, Ralph watches as he lazily unbuckles his belt, pulls it from the loops with deliberate movements. It lands with a loud noise across the room when he throws it away, but Jack seems unfazed as he continues stripping, never looking away from Ralph, kneeling between his open knees as he kicks his jeans away.

'Before I give you what you want - kiss me.' He murmurs, motioning to the growing hardness that Ralph can see through the flimsy grey cotton of his briefs. He leans forward, mouthing along the quickly growing tent in his underwear. Jack holds himself absolutely still, even though he's frustrated by the muffling of Ralph's pretty lips by the fabric. Something was better than nothing.

Despite this, his resolve quickly dissolves, and he finds himself desperate for the contact.

'Fuck it,' he growls, pushing Ralph back gently and pulling his briefs down, gripping his cock by the base. The blond immediately takes his length into his mouth, throat working around him in that excellent squeeze of his throat that Jack has always loved.

'God, baby, you look so good with my cock down your throat,' Ralph makes a strangled noise in answer, shifting closer and bobbing his head with more enthusiasm. Jack curses, cradling the back of his head, meeting his eyes evenly as his hips twitch up into the blond's mouth intermittently.

Soon, he takes a handful of his hair and pulls him back, breath quivering.

'I'll come if you keep doing that., and I'm not done with you yet, pretty boy.' He helps Ralph stand, guiding him to sit on the bed, releasing one of his wrists from the restraint. His voice softens after he kisses the heel of the freed hand.

'Do you want them off?'

'No. It's only fair. You wore them last week.'

'I only want you to wear them if you want it.' Jack frowns, kissing his jaw. Ralph nods, wrapping his arms around him. The dangling end of the cuffs hit against Jack's ribs.

'I want it. I want you.'

'Okay,' The handcuffs are replaced, and Ralph lies back on the pillows, lifting his arms above his head, and letting Jack trail his mouth down his side with minimal squirming. Jack wraps his arms around his waist, pulling him closer, gripping his rear roughly as he straightens, biting along his jaw. Ralph slings his arms over his neck, the cold chain making Jack shudder when it presses to the back of his neck. The arm around Ralph's waist travels up to support his back when Jack sits back, holding him against his chest as he leaves marks along his jaw.

'I have work tomorrow.' Ralph murmurs, pushing his nose into Jack's curls, fingers tight over his shoulder blades.

'Put ice on them.' Jack hums, sucking at the soft skin under his chin when Ralph tilts his head back despite the objections. Jack shifts so he's sitting back against the end of the bed, gripping Ralph across the shoulders and under his rear, fingers digging deep into his skin. He mouths at the purple smudges he left, thumb pressing into his hipbone until he whimpers, hips pulling away.

'Don't be so rough.' He whispers, tugging him down to kiss the top of his head. Jack hums against his collarbone when Ralph rubs his fingers through his scalp gently.

'Sorry. I just want to leave my mark.'

'Here?' Ralph lifts his hip into Jack's hand, then chuckles quietly, 'No one but you and me is gonna see bruises past my neck, maybe my arms. Don't be silly, baby.'

'I like to see them.' Ralph's lips are warm against his ear when the blond laughs again, using the chain pressed against the back of his neck to pull him with him when he lies back again.

'You're too strange, Jack,' Jack nips at his collarbone playfully, moving his other hand down to grip his other hip, pull Ralph closer down the bed, seeking contact, always seeking contact.

'You love it.'

'I love _you_ ,' Ralph's fingers dig under his shoulder blades again, and Jack thinks that he'll be left with bruises of his own, 'Fuck me.' Ralph holds him close when he says it, hips tilting up into his grip.  
Jack is more than happy to oblige, blindly searching through the drawer of the bedside table until his hand brushes against the familiar shape of the bottle of lube. He pulls back enough to push his forehead to Ralph's, reaching between them to cover his length in lube. He caps the tube, drops it onto the bed beside him.

'Do you still want it rough?' Ralph tugs the cuffs until the distance Jack had put between them is closed again.

'No. Be romantic.'

'You know I'm bad at romance.' Still, Jack kisses along his cheekbone.

'You're fine at romance. Just... Go slow, alright? Say nice things.' Jack sinks down further, brushing his hair from his forehead as he lines himself up, sliding in slowly.

'I thought I was the one in charge tonight.'

'You're never in charge, baby. I just let you think you are.' Jack pauses, tries not to laugh too loudly, holding still until Ralph's hips tilt up. He kisses his neck and starts moving again, gripping Ralph's shoulder tightly, letting out a shaky breath.

'Oh God. Oh, God, _fuck_ , Ralph, I love you. I love you so much,' Ralph hums, kissing his shoulder, fingers scrabbling at his back, 'You're so perfect.'

'You aren't too bad yourself.' Ralph whispers, voice trembling, his legs clinging to either side of Jack's waist. Jack moans into his ear, moving into him slowly, carefully.

'You're so amazing, sweetness. I can't believe you're mine.' Jack pushes his nose into Ralph's hair, kissing him several times, gripping his upper arms to keep himself grounded.

'Believe it, baby. I'm yours, you're mine.' Forearms press into his back, blunt nails dig into the base of his neck.

'Say that again,' Jack groans, pausing to lift Ralph's hips to a better angle before continuing his adoring thrusts into him.

'I'm yours, and you're mine.' Ralph whispers, voice heavy, breaking off in a moan when Jack reaches between them, running his fingers over his cock.

'I'm yours,' Jack whispers, 'Forever and always.' Ralph nods against his cheek.

'Yes. Forever and always.' His voice is more breath than spoken word, but Jack doesn't mind, 'Please, go a bit faster. Only a little.' Jack does as he asks, rolling his hips further against Ralph, picking up the pace slightly. Ralph moans into his shoulder, cursing softly when Jack strokes him in time to his thrusts.

'I want us to come together. Can you do that for me, beautiful?' Ralph nods quietly, fingers tightening over his shoulder blades. 'I need an answer.'

'Yes. Yes, baby, I'll do anything for you, anything you want.'

'Alright, sweetness. I'm close, are you ready?'

'Almost. Keep doing that.' Jack pulls back enough to look at Ralph - his eyes are slightly out of focus, and he chews on his lip.

'Fuck, Ralph, you're so pretty. So fucking beautiful.' Ralph rests his temple on his shoulder, looking up into his eyes. Jack adjusts his hold on his cock and strokes with a firmer touch, hand now moving faster than his hips.

'Okay. Yeah. I'm getting close.' He manages, voice a strained whisper. Jack pulls him close again, whispering praise into his ear as he tries to simultaneously chase his own climax and bring Ralph to his. Despite his best effort, he comes first, spilling into Ralph as he whispers his name. Ralph comes moments after, leaning against him as he whimpers through it, whole body quivering.

 

Jack pulls out and sits back, holding Ralph's quivering form against his front, stroking his hair and rubbing his back.

'You were so good, baby, so good. I love you so much,' Ralph yawns in response, kissing the dip in his collarbone, 'We should go get cleaned up. Shower or bath?'

'Yeah,' Ralph shifts against him, leaning into him further, not quite answering his question, 'You might wanna get these off, first.' Ralph tiredly lifts his arms over Jack's head, holds out his shackled wrists. Jack chuckles, freeing his wrists and rubbing the pink skin.

'Looks like you won't bruise. These will probably fade by the morning.' Ralph frowns slightly, looks to the yellowing bruises on Jack's wrists.

'Pity. I wanted to match.' The idea of bathing is thrown out the window when Ralph lies back, arms around Jack's neck, lips on his temple.

'We will next time, baby.'


	4. III

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is lesbian jalph ficlet, inspired by jessng's lovely [sinners](http://archiveofourown.org/works/7803745%22) that's incredible and beautiful nd i love weddings  
> go check the author of the original story on tumblr [here](http://faceitimanasshole.tumblr.com/) bc honestly they're amazing nd sweet nd !!!! nice

Ralph wakes up to Jack's arm squeezing the life out of her, the redhead's nose buried in her neck. She grunts, rolls over in her tight hold, and slings an arm over her waist.

'Mornin'.' Jack's voice is hoarse in her ear, and Ralph hums, kissing her chest.

'Today's the day.'

'Yes, it is.'

'What time is it?' Jack breathes in sharply, moving so her cheek rests on Ralph's shoulder, reaching for her phone.

'We slept in a bit. 8.' All tiredness has vanished from Ralph's mind, and she shoves Jack away.

'Shit! Simon and Charlie are gonna be here soon, to take me to the church. You need to... Do whatever with Roger or whatever. It's bad luck.' Jack yawns.

'That's just for straight people, baby. C'mon, we'll get up when they get here.' Jack rolls back over, draping an arm across Ralph's stomach.

'Jacqueline, please. This is important to me.' Ralph pushes her arm away, and slips out from under the covers, searching for something to cover her half-nakedness. Jack groans, sits up.

'Fine.'

'Get dressed, hang out with your buddies. Buddy, I suppose.' Ralph calls, pulling one of Jack's sleep shirts over herself, pulling her hair into a bun. Jack grumbles, getting dressed and standing behind Ralph, kissing her shoulder.

'I have plenty of friends.' She murmurs.

'Go, Jack,' Ralph turns to push at her shoulder, leaning on the dresser, 'I love you.'

'Shit, lady, I am,' Jack steals a kiss, then walks the small distance from the bedroom to the door, 'See you later.'

 

A few minutes later, there's a knock at the door, and Ralph opens it to Simon, already looking ready to perform the ceremony that afternoon.

'There's the woman of the hour!' Ralph grins, pulling a pair of tights on under the sleep shirt, 'I just walked past Jacqueline. You guys sleep in or something?'

'Yeah,'

'Or did you...' Simon doesn't finish his sentence, eyebrows raising and grin widening.

'Fuck off.' Ralph grumbles, cheeks heating up, despite the fact that their night would be rated PG-13, at the most.

 

In Charlie's tiny, yet expensive, car, Ralph crams herself into the backseat with the dress, safe in a dry cleaning bag, and other bags that she doesn't dare look in. Even with her average height, her shoulders are still hunched and head sunk low. She couldn't imagine Jack fitting in the car, even in the more spacious front seat.

They listen to some of Charlie's music - a mix of Top 40's pop songs and the odd oldie - on the way to the church.  
It was small and cramped, with no stained glass windows, and, overall, not what Ralph imagined when she was little, when she had binders full of dresses and bouquets and pretty boys she would marry. But it was hard to find a church that would hold a same-sex wedding, even with a friend performing the ceremony, so the church they found and actually sort of liked was an hour and a half out of the way, and by the end of the drive, Ralph was really wishing that Charlie would invest in a bigger car sometime soon.

 

She stretches when they finally pull into the parking lot, groaning and leaning on the door.

'Why the hell is your car so tiny?' Her voice is just too sharp when Charlie steps out.

'I like how it looks.' Ralph purses her lips, then lets it go, helping Simon carry the bags in, her stomach squeezing as worries that maybe the staff changed their mind and decided not to let her get married here replace her frustrations of Charlie's cramped backseat. She holds Simon's free hand, but there is no throwing out when they enter the vestibule, or when they step into a back room to get ready. Simon hangs the dress on the back of the door, then steps out when Charlie spreads her things out on the table provided, sitting Ralph down in front of a old-looking mirror.

 

'I know you said you didn't care what I did with... You, as long as you looked good, but, are you sure you don't have any, like, suggestions or anything?'

'Just... Don't cake my face in that stuff. And I think I'd want my hair back.' Charlie smiles down at her.

'Cool, I guess. We should get you dressed first, though.'

 

Half an hour later, Ralph is standing in front of the mirror, hands fisted in her skirt. Charlie has long deserted the room, and it's dead silent, save for the birds chirping happily outside the window. She stares her reflection down, picking out all the little flaws that Jack might see when she stands before her.

She liked her dress really. It was nice on the mannequin, and prettier on her, in the bright lights of the boutique she went to with Simon the day after Jack officially proposed. In the bright sunlight that fills the tiny space, it looked great, but there was something chewing at the back of her mind about it, even though there was nothing wrong with it. It had an A-line silhouette, the skirt layered with soft chiffon and embroidered with pretty designs that Ralph liked to run her fingers over, when she first tried it on. The same embroidery covered the bodice. Ralph tucks a piece of hair behind her ear, then pulls it free again, tracing the sweetheart neckline, heart in her throat.  
Someone knocks at the door softly, then Simon peeks around it.

'You ready?' Ralph nods, and Simon slips into the room without opening the door any further, stepping up behind her.

'Is my dad here? My step-mother said she would...'

'Maybe he'll be late?' Simon adjusts the short sleeves while Ralph blinks back tears, and nods. Her father was never late.

'If my mom was alive she would've come.'

'I know. You good?' Ralph nods, turning to her friend.

'I think so.'

'You think so?'

'The dress is... Different. Somehow. I don't know.' She shrugs, biting down on her cheek again.

'It's just nerves. Jack looks incredible, surprisingly. You'll feel amazing once you get out there.' Ralph sniffs, nods, and looks up to keep the tears from falling.

'Don't ruin Charlie's hard work.' Simon jokes, then kisses her forehead when she laughs, and guides her out into the hall.

Ralph tightens her fingers around the delicate bouquet of golden flowers when Canon in D swells in her ears, heart rate picking up when Charlie replaces Simon, who slips in through another door to take his place up behind the pulpit.

'I saw Jacqueline. She looks good in a suit.' Charlie whispers, but Ralph doesn't have the chance to reply before the doors swing open, and her eyes land on Jack, and she can't stop smiling.

She was standing with her back to her, but she spins as soon as the guests stands, and her eyes go wide. She's dressed in a suit with a long tail, black and tailored to her thin, tall frame, her usually wild curls tamed into a quiff. Ralph feels her face get hot under Jack's gaze, and she grips her bouquet tighter as Charlie walks her down the aisle.

 _Please don't trip_. Her legs quiver, even though she wears higher heels than these to work, and she takes a shaky breath. Charlie smiles at the redhead when they get to the alter, but everything else fades to the background when Ralph stands before the other girl.

'You're stunning.' Jack whispers, breathless, and Ralph bites her lip, wants to kiss her again and again, friends and Jack's family be damned, hold her close and just be with her, in this moment, forever.

Simon starts speaking, the music petering to a stop, Roger sneaking out from behind the piano to stand behind Jack. Ralph reaches out, grips Jack's hand, heart soaring. She can't quite meet her gaze, but she knows it's the same look she had on when they first kissed, when they first fucked. The look that told Ralph that she was this girl's entire world and more, the look that Ralph can only describe as the feeling of Jack's hands on her, lips on hers. That look was the only thing about Jack that scared Ralph anymore.

Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Simon turn to her, and forces herself to pay attention.

'Raphaela Nicole Gornick, do you take Jacqueline Merridew as your unlawfully,' Simon smiles like he's just told a grand joke, 'wedded wife?'

'I do.'

'Do you promise to be true to her in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, to love her and honor her for as long as you both shall live?'

'I do.' Ralph feels like bouncing in place, squeezing Jack's hand tightly.

'And do you, Jacqu-'

'Fuck yes, to all of it.' There's a soft ripple of laughter, and Simon looks as if he's forgotten what to say next, glancing first to Charlie, then to Roger, who mouths something to him.

'Ah. Yes. You can... Do the thing. With the rings.' Roger slips out to sit behind the piano again as Ralph finally meets Jack's gaze, the gold band slid onto her finger. She copies the action, laughing nervously.

'You may now... Uh, shit, you two may now kiss. You're now officially joined in unholy matrimony.' Ralph glances out to their friends, then back to Jack before her arms are around her waist, pulling her to the taller girl's front as she kisses her, long and full of love and passion. She grips her face, leaning into the kiss and closing her eyes. When she pulls back, there's cheering, then someone asks about cake, and she all but giggles, embracing her wife tightly, pressing her face into her neck.

'I love you.' Jack mumbles, voice muffled against her skin.

'I love you, too.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i based ralph's dress off an actual dress right [here](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/226376318749481593/) bc im trash nd unoriginal


	5. IV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if i have ever talked to you abt anything ever concerning lord of the flies and ships, i have probably brought up this au to you  
> but  
> wow  
> friends with benefits!jager bc why not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i might do more of this, but im not sure, so i didnt mark it as a part one lmao
> 
> also roger uses jack's last name but i didn't bc aint nobody got time for that

Ninety percent of the times that they did this, Jack's mouth was thick with the taste of some sort of alcohol and the air of Roger's room was heavy with smoke, even with the window left wide open. Ninety percent of the time, they pulled at each other's clothes and bit at each other's skin, and Jack would moan another's name into Roger's neck. 

But tonight was one of the rare nights were Jack's eyes were clear of anger, drunkeness, and he had left his cigarettes in his bag.

He hadn't even called - just a quick text, and then Jack was scaling the tree outside of his window, slipping through it easily, and pulling Roger against the wall, kissing him roughly. Roger learned not to ask questions when they first started doing this, as Jack just ignored them and pressed on. He let him take off his shirt, drag him to the bed, pull him down on top of him, and bite along his torso.

 

Now, Roger is only in his briefs, and Jack's shirt has been removed. His fingers dig harsh into his rear, teeth on his shoulder.

'Can I fuck you?' Roger grips at his hair, tugs at the curls, nodding breathlessly, 'Tell me, Rog, lemme hear it.' Jack's teeth travel to his throat, leaving behind a mark that's barely visible on his darker skin.

'Fuck me. Fuck me hard, Merridew.' He hisses through gritted teeth, and Jack lets out a shaky breath against his neck, the sound of his belt being pulled free from the belt loops of his jeans fills the room, then the sound of his fly getting pulled down follows soon after.

'Take off your underwear,' He whispers against his ear, hot and strained on the shell. Roger quickly does as he's told, then shifts in Jack's lap, the denim of his jeans scraping the underside of his thighs. Roger leans back to look at Jack.

'How do you want me, Merridew?'

'Ride me.' Lube is haphazardly spread over Jack's length, then the redhead leans back. Roger lifts himself up, carefully lowering himself onto Jack, fingers digging into his shoulders, sure to leave bruises on the pale, surprisingly delicate skin. Jack leans up, blunt nails digging into his back, holding Roger close as he moves up into him with harsh movements. The redhead curses against the side of the dark haired boy's head, then cranes his neck to suck another mark onto his shoulder.

'Fuck, you're tight.' Jack grunts out, and rakes his nails down his back, making Roger arch into him, fingers digging deeper into his shoulders as he presses his cheek against Jack's curls, dampened with sweat.

The darker boy groans, long and throaty and low, when the taller boy thrusts especially hard, making him jolt against him.

Jack moans a name that isn't his against his shoulder, but Roger doesn't mind, is used to it, allows his best friend to fuck him while thinking of another, takes pleasure in it.

Suddenly, Jack stops, and Roger jerks back, breathing laboured.

'Why'd you stop?'

'Was about to come. Didn't want to so soon,' Jack pushes at his chest, 'Get off. I'll... I'll wank you off or something.' The sensitive skin of Roger's thighs are burning and tender from Jack's jeans, and he winces when he lifts himself from his lap, shifting to the empty space on the bed. Jack leans over, grasps Roger's cock loosely with one hand, stroking it lazily as he rests his chin in his hand. His eyelids are lowered and he's regarding the task like it's the most boring thing he's ever done, and Roger resists the urge to pull away. They were nothing but good friends who fuck on weekends - as Jack is always quick to point out on Mondays - and Jack was into someone else. Of course he wouldn't be into it.

'Is this working for you?' Jack's voice, however quiet it was at that moment, startles Roger out of his thoughts, 'I could like, suck you off if it isn't.' Roger shrugs a shoulder, and Jack purses his lips.

He slide down off the bed and onto his knees. Jack wraps his lips around the head, and Roger clenches his jaw and digs his nails into his palms when he hollows his cheeks around him. Jack closes his eyes and works the shaft with his hand, and Roge allowes himself to relax.

'Fuck,' He whispers, and he can feel Jack laugh around him, encouraged to take more of him into his mouth by his reaction. Roger cards his fingers through his curls, then tugs at the red locks, biting his lip when Jack pulls back slowly, thin lips tight around him. Roger resists the urge to snap his hips up into his mouth, just smooths the hair from his friend's face and lets him go at his pace. His torturously slow pace. He lets out another shaky curse as Jack sinks back down, his spit helping his lips slide over his length easily.

He hits the back of Jack's throat, making him cough and jerk back when his cock twitches. Jack pulls away fully, and his grip is firmer around him when he strokes him again, and he looks more present in this moment.

'Are you close to coming?' He whispers, and Roger nods, reaching down to grip the arm that isn't bringing him to orgasm, fingers digging into his bicep. Jack hurriedly pulls a tissue from the box on the bedside table, wrapping it over his head, and Roger is glad when he crashes over the edge, cursing quietly as he comes into the tissue, breathing heavily.

Jack tosses the tissue into the bin, then wipes his hand on his trousers carelessly.

'You fit to go on? I can take care of myself if you're not.' Roger takes a deep breath and slides back to let Jack climb back up onto the bed.

'I'm good.' He murmurs, using Jack's chest to steady himself as he climbs back on top of him.

Jack spreads more lube over his length, more careful this time, and Roger lowers himself onto him, quicker this time. Jack's nails retrace the scratches he left, and leave a few more as he starts moving into him again.

'Fuck, I love how tight you are. It feels fuckin' amazing.' He whispers into his hair, hands traveling to his hips to leave bruises that Roger wouldn't be able to see, but would feel when he brushes his own fingers over his hips later. Jack is clearly chasing his own orgasm, thrusting hard and thrusting deep. He bites into his shoulder unexpectedly, making Roger gasp and jerk away.

'Make noises. I wanna hear you moan.' Roger slowly settles back against him, and relaxes again. He groans when Jack's hand runs over his sensitive cock, then groans louder when Jack takes the moment where he is distracted to thrust up into him faster. Roger's hands lay on his chest, nails digging into his flesh.

'I'm gonna - fuck, I'm gonna come. Shit - fuck -' Jack pulls out, scrabbling for a tissue. He barely covers himself when he's spilling into it, moaning out the same name as earlier. Roger leans against the wall to catch his breath while Jack gets rid of the tissue, zips himself up, and hands him his briefs. Suddenly, they were friends without the benefits.

'Can I ask what that was about?' Roger asks, still breathless.

'Gornick was being a dick. And I was horny. Cheers.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lhlkduebfuebdahluec i cant write roger when hes in a main role
> 
> i struggled a lot wit this chapter man  
> like i was gonna develop nd #confirm things abt roger but it would work so  
> maybe another time


	6. V

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shower sex ft. lesbian jalph for an anon on the tumbles  
> 

After work, Ralph goes straight to the bathroom, barely stopping to toss her keys and bag onto the counter or kick off her flats.

She shuts the door behind her and sighs, leaning on the painted wood, then pulls her hair free of the tight bun, massing a temple as she walks across the small room to turn on the shower. The blonde knocks the lid on the toilet down, then pushes out of her pencil skirt and pulls her blouse off, stretching as she steps under the scorching stream of water, closing her eyes.

Ralph doesn't hear Jack get home, nor does she hear her join her until she wraps an arm around her waist, pulling her sore body close.

'You're gonna use up all the hot water if you keep showering like this.' She hums, kissing her neck.  The smaller girl stretches against her, then drapes an arm behind her neck.

'Good thing you're in here right now. Besides - it soothes the muscles.'

'Why do your muscles need soothing? All you do is sit at a desk and look pretty - and rudely shush people.'

'I gotta sort books too. You know how high those shelves are?' Ralph cranes her neck and kisses Jack lazily, then finally gives in and turns in her hold, taking her face in her hands to deepen the kiss.

'The shelves aren't too high. You're just short.' Jack mumbles into her mouth. Ralph frowns, and shoves her against the tile.

'Talk less,' She whispers, then bends her neck to kiss her neck, scalding water hitting the back of her shoulders. Jack tangles her fingers in her wet hair, holding her close while the shorter girl sucks marks into her collarbone.

Jack's other hand works between them, and as soon as her hand brushes over the other girl's cunt, Ralph whimpers, nails digging into her hip.

'You like that?' The redhead whispers, regardless of the blonde's earlier order. Ralph nods, then resumes sucking marks on the skin of her chest, cut short when Jack slides a finger into her. She moans, forehead resting on her shoulder.  
After a few minutes of Jack working her index finger in and out of Ralph, the shorter girl flips them around and presses on her shoulders.

'Kneel. I'll wash your hair. You can... You know.' She gasps, and Jack smiles, sliding down to kiss her navel.

'Only if you say it.' She taunts, teasing the tip of her finger over her clit. Ralph opens her thighs and presses down on her head.

' _Fuck_. Please... Jack, eat me out. Fuck - I need your mouth on me - now. Please.' Jack hums, dropping to her knees under the spray. Before she begins, she shifts so she's out of water.

'Since you've asked so nicely,' She presses chaste kisses to the tops of her thighs, 'I thought you were gonna wash my hair?' She smiles up at Ralph, slowly teasing the tip of her finger into her.  
Ralph shakily squirts some shampoo into her palm and massages it through Jack's scalp. Pleased, Jack spreads her open with two fingers and sucks at her clit. It takes a great deal of concentration for Ralph to continue to wash her hair as she lets out a shuddering moan, fingers tightening around the soapy, limp curls. Jack smiles around her, pushing her finger all the way in, gently setting her teeth around her clit.

'Jack - fuck, Jack, don't stop. Please don't stop.'

'We need to get clean as well.' Jack mumbles, barely able to pull away from her. Ralph whimpers, bites down hard on her lip, and shakily continues to massage the shampoo through her hair.

'God - you're so _distracting_.' Jack still hasn't latched her mouth back onto her cunt, so Ralph presses her hips forward, whining.

'Now you know what it's like to be around you all the time.' Jack pushes another finger into her, and Ralph grasps her shoulder for support, tilting her head back against the tile. Jack shifts so she's under the spray again, the suds of shampoo rinsing down her neck and onto Ralph's hands.

'Please, baby, I want - your mouth. On me. Oh  _God_ , Jack, please.' The taller girl grins, leaning forward to press a kiss to her clit. Immediately, one of Ralph's hands presses to the back of her head, holding her there, hips rolling down on her mouth. Jack gives up on teasing the other girl, and licks at her cunt, eyes on her face. Ralph's spine is curved off the tile wall, fingers of both hands tangled in her hair. Her eyes are shut, face screwed in pleasure. She moans, then gasps, thighs quivering and twitching around Jack's head.

'You gonna come for me, baby?' She isn't sure if the girl can understand her, but the response is Ralph pressing her hips down against her mouth firmly, mouth open in a perfect _O_. Jack leans forward and hums, holding back a smile when Ralph cries out.

'Fuck - do... do that again,' Jack does as she's told, and Ralph sobs, lurching forward into the water, the ends of her wet hair hanging down in Jack's eyes, 'I'm gonna... _shit_... I'm gonna come, keep going.' The redhead presses forward, eager to bring the blonde  to climax, pushing a third finger into her.

Ralph cries out when she climaxes, clinging to the sides of Jack's head, her thighs twitching and knees weak, close to buckling. The water has cooled down a considerable amount, but it's a welcome change on her heated skin. Jack pulls back and finds a washcloth, gently cleaning the inside of her thighs of the sticky mess. Once she is clean, Jack straightens up, and kisses Ralph gently.

'You good?' Ralph nods, resting her head on Jack's shoulder.

'That was a good one,' She murmurs, kissing her neck, 'You want me to do it to you?'

'Only if you want to.'

'I do. I like making you feel good.' With that, Ralph drops heavily to her knees, hands on Jack's hips. Jack calmly gathers her hair up and massages shampoo through her hair while Ralph presses soft kisses to the inside of her thighs. Ralph sits back on her heels and slides her middle finger into Jack, biting her lip. She watches for a reaction, but is slightly disappointed to find that there isn't one. Jack represses a grin, and leans forward to continue washing her hair. Ralph bends forward and kisses her hipbone, adding another finger. Jack's breath hitches, just enough to be noticeable, and Ralph smiles against her skin, victorious, and crooks her fingers up. Jack gasps, lifting her hips up, and curses under her breath.

'Shit - Ralph, don't-'

'Don't what? Do this?' Ralph straightens her fingers then bends them again, pressing up. Jack cuts a cry short by biting her lip, and tightens her fingers in Ralph's soapy hair.

' _Fuck_ \- yes. Don't. It's... distracting. Just... lemme wash your hair first.'

'Now you know what it feels like.' She murmurs, biting her hipbone. She straightens her fingers again, sliding them in and out of her slowly. Jack lets out a breath and rinses her hands of the suds. Ralph looks up at her, then tilts her head back into the spray, pulling her fingers away for a moment to splay her hair out against her back. Jack tucks a stray piece of hair behind her ear, waiting for her to rinse out her hair, tapping her fingers on her knee and chewing her lip. Ralph pulls her hair over a shoulder and leans back in, kissing her stomach and easing three fingers into her.  
Jack's hips jump, and she moans, gripping her hair tightly. Ralph smiles, rising up to kiss her, free hand on her jaw, fingers set wide and thumb pressed under her sharp jawbone. Jack leans into the kiss, hips rolling against her hand. The blonde pulls back and kisses her collarbone, leaving a mark. Her thumb presses against Jack's clit, and the redhead's arm tightens across her back, head falling down against hers.

'Want me to do that again?' Ralph whispers against her collarbone. There's only a nod in reply, and Jack pulls her closer. Ralph leans back as far as she can in Jack's arms, looking down the small space between their bodies to focus on her clit. Jack lurches forward against her, biting at her shoulder.

'Keep doing that - fuck, I'm gonna come, I'm so close, baby.' Her whisper is hot in her ear, and Ralph bites her lip, pushing her fingers of her other hand through Jack's hair, holding her against her neck, fingers moving quickly. Jack presses into her, breathing quick and rasping, and she moans loudly, biting down on her shoulder while riding out her climax. Ralph slows her fingers to ease her from the high, kissing her temple and murmuring sweet nothings against her hair. Jack's arm falls limp by her side, and she leans her head against the tile, chest heaving. Ralph steps back, sucking her fingers clean and smiling around them.

'You clean yet?'


	7. VI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another request from an anonymous asker on me [tumbles](http://savajack.tumblr.com)  
> ralmon first times ^^

Everyone knew that something like this was bound to happen eventually. It was a given, when the line between _platonic_ and _something more_ was blurred when concerning Ralph and Simon's relationship, when they frequently dipped into the side of _something more_. Even before it happens, they were never explicitly _platonic_.

 

It happens on a Friday evening, they're curled up under a thick blanket on Simon's sofa. Ralph's arm is slung over Simon's thin shoulders, and Simon's head is resting on Ralph's upper arm. Their hands are joined, and they're focused on the movie playing on Simon's television - all quiet and soft and pastel colors. Ralph thoughtlessly kisses the top of Simon's head, squeezes his hand, and returns his attention to the movie. Simon hums, nestling further into the blond's side. 

Neither of them can say for sure what happens. Maybe what caused it was that insignificant little kiss pressed to Simon's temple. Or maybe it was Simon's hand, brushing over Ralph's thigh in a certain way. Or maybe it was Ralph's thumb, tracing the line of Simon's jaw. Maybe it was just them, wrapped up so close together.  
Regardless, one moment they were just watching a movie, and the next, Simon's graceful hands are on Ralph's cheeks and their lips are pressed together. They had to go in twice - the first time, they had bumped noses, and Ralph's face and neck had went bright red - and were careful the second time. The kiss is far from frenzied - it's slow and careful and, to an outsider, could be chalked up to two teenage boys just being curious.

But it was much more than that.

 

Simon lets out the tiniest of whimpers and leans into Ralph, hesitantly parts his lips in an unspoken invitation to deepen the kiss. Ralph glances to the screen, then blindly grabs for the remote. One press of a button sends them into darkness, and Ralph pulls back, resting his forehead on Simon's.

'Do you want this? Us?' There is a long silence, and Simon's hands are resting, still as a statue, on his chest.

'Yes,' It's just above a whisper, and if they weren't so close, Ralph would've missed it.

'Yeah?' He murmurs back, just to make sure, hands sliding up the thinner boy's waist, 'You sure?'

'I'm sure.'

'Do... do you wanna go somewhere? Somewhere else? Somewhere less... In the open?'

'Okay.' This response is even smaller, but Ralph doesn't make sure. He would when they were behind closed doors. Simon stands first, tugging him up by his hands and guiding him through the dark.

They stumble up the stairs, not bothering to turn on a light until they land in front of Simon's room, and flick the lights on, slipping in and locking the door behind them. Ralph stands in the middle of the room, shifting from foot to foot, and Simon awkwardly sits on his bed. Both are suddenly unsure what to do next, and Ralph is tempted to just return back downstairs and turn the movie back on. Maybe kiss some more. The kissing was nice. Then, Simon speaks.

'Should we... I dunno, like? Make out or whatever?' Ralph shrugs a shoulder, face heating up as he sits beside Simon. Simon takes his face in his hands, and kisses him hesitantly. Ralph melts into the kiss, hands curling in Simon's jumper, gently tugging him closer. For a long time, they just kiss, keeping their hands relatively to themselves, never venturing past each other's hips. Then Ralph pulls back, looking at Simon's swollen lips, and knowing his were in no better state.

'Can I kiss your neck?' He whispers, breathless, and Simon nods, then tilts his head back to bare the graceful column of his throat. Ralph leans in and presses closed-mouth kissed to his bobbing Adam's apple, then over his fluttering pulse, grasping his knee. Simon's long fingers slide through his hair, and he sighs contentedly. Ralph pulls back and wets his lips, and Simon turns towards him, pressing as close as he can without climbing into his lap.

'Can I... Do the same?' Ralph nods slowly, then bares his throat. Simon leans in shyly, dark eyes darting to Ralph's, then to his throat. Ralph shivers when his warm lips press to the hollow of his collarbone, and Simon brushes light kisses in a path from the hollow of his collarbone to the point of his chin, fingers ghosting over his arm. Ralph lowers his chin to catch Simon's lips again, seeking the softness that he could very quickly grow accustomed to.

'Si,' He tugs at the hem of the smaller boy's jumper, 'Do you wanna... You know.'

'Do I wanna what?'

'You know.' Ralph isn't looking at Simon's face, but he can hear the smile in his voice when he speaks again.

'Tell me.'

'Do you wanna... Have sex?' Ralph internally winces at how clinical it sounded. But it was better than the crudeness of _Hey, let's fuck_ \- Simon was too pretty for that. And it was much too soon to _make love_.

'Yes.' Again with the soft responses.

'Is it okay if I take this off?' Simon hesitates at this, but nods after a beat, lifting his arms. Ralph rolls the soft jumper up his stomach, bending to kiss the toffee-coloured skin, then gathers it around the smaller boy's neck to guide it over his head carefully. Simon draws his arms over his rib cage, and Ralph drops the jumper.

'We don't have to do this, y'know.' 

'I know. I want to. Could I... Could I take off your shirt?' Ralph nods, lifting his arms. Simon pulls his shirt off quicker than he did for him, and, without hesitation, touches his stomach. It's firmer than his, from the three years of playing rugby and football, but not as defined as Ralph would like it to be. Simon leans up and kisses Ralph tenderly, taking him with him as he lies back. Ralph rises onto his knees, fingers buried in Simon's soft hair. Simon's legs find their way between his thighs, and Ralph swallows thickly, pulling away.

'Have you ever...?'

'Once. You?'

'A couple times,' Ralph leans in and kisses his jaw carefully, 'But never with a boy.' Simon nods against the side of his head, placing his hands on his back somewhat awkwardly.

'It isn't so bad.'

'Do you wanna be on the top or the bottom?' Ralph mumbles into his skin.

'Uh. Bottom?'

'If you don't like it, we can switch.' Simon nods in agreement, then gently pushes his thigh up against Ralph's crotch. The blond gasps, quietly, and his hand goes between them to palm at Simon's crotch. Simon slowly moves his thigh up and down, pushing his nose into the crook of Ralph's neck and drawing him closer.

'Can I take off your trousers?' Ralph's voice is quiet and strained in his ear. Simon whispers an affirmative, and Ralph unbuckles his belt and tugs his jeans down his thighs, pulling away to look down the limited space between their bodies, cheeks tinted pink. Simon lifts his hips from the bed to help him, then pushes them away with his feet, looking into Ralph's eyes.

'I want you.' It's as obscene as Ralph can imagine Simon getting, and his cheeks heat up more.

'I want you, too.'

'Can I take these off?' Simon is tugging at his trousers. Ralph nods, and his belt is pulled off, his trousers quickly following. Ralph leans back to look at Simon, eyes soft. Simon can't describe what he feels under Ralph's gaze at that moment, but he knows that whatever he's feeling is scaring him, so he looks away, cheeks burning. Ralph kisses his cheek, guiding him closer.

'Are you sure you wanna do this?'

'Yes,'

'Because we can just go back downstairs. I'll forget this happened.'

'I want you, Ralph. Do you want me?' Simon looks to him now, cheeks hot.

'Yes.' Simon leans in close.

'T-then fuck me.'

 

They quickly rid themselves of their shorts, then roll over so Simon is straddling Ralph's waist.

'Do you have anything to... y'know, help?' Ralph's hands are tight on Simon's thighs, the roughest he had been with him all evening.

'Uh, shoot... I have lotion?' Ralph nods, letting go of him to allow the slighter boy to get off him and retrieve the bottle. Simon hurries across the room and rifles through the basket of body care items on his dresser, spinning on his heel with a small bottle of hand cream. Ralph has risen to one elbow, supporting his cheek with his hand. He smiles and nods again, lying back while Simon crosses the room again.

'Are you ready?' The darker boy mumbles, climbing back on top of the blond. Ralph nods, meeting his gaze evenly. Simon turns around and slathers some of the cold lotion over Ralph's length, then turns back around, cheeks hot as he wipes the remainder of the lotion off on his thigh. Ralph rises onto his elbows.

'You good?' He whispers, and Simon nods, rising up and slowly lowering himself onto him, letting out a long breath. Ralph's own breath catches, and he forces himself to hold still while Simon shifts on top of him, teeth digging into his bottom lip. After a beat, Simon nods, tugging Ralph to sit up. Both of their faces are flushed, and Ralph slowly starts to roll his hips up against Simon's. He leans in and kisses his shoulder, whispering praise and compliments into his skin, biting back a moan when Simon begins moving up and down. Ralph braces an arm across Simon's slender back, holding him close and pressing open-mouthed kisses to his jaw.

'God - Oh, Simon, you're so good, so goddamned perfect,' Simon whimpers, nails digging painfully into Ralph's back as they slowly move together. Ralph bites his lip, leaning back, 'Look at me, Si. I'm so close - I need to look into your eyes when I come.' Simon lifts his head, wetting his lips.

'That didn't take long.' He whispers, voice broken by heavy breaths and quiet moans. Ralph gives Simon a crooked smile, gripping his hips and kissing him gently.

'It's been a while.' Ralph whispers back when the kiss breaks, and Simon nods in silent agreement.

'Do you wanna stop for a bit so you can last longer?' Ralph hesitates, then makes a noise that Simon thinks is an agreement, releasing his hips. It takes all of Simon's willpower to climb off of him, knees already shaking. Ralph leans forward and kisses him again, hand hovering over his cock.

'Can I touch you?' Simon nods breathlessly, and Ralph circles his fingers around him, stroking him slowly. Simon whimpers quietly, and rests his head on Ralph's shoulder, closing his eyes and revelling in the feeling of the other's hand working him gently. Ralph kisses his temple and murmurs soft compliments into his ear as Simon rolls his hips up into his hand, moaning quietly.

'Crap - I shouldn't have given you shit about not lasting long,' Simon mutters, chest heaving as he grips Ralph's bicep.

'How come?'

'Because I'm about two seconds away from coming right now.' This just seems to egg Ralph on - his hand moves quicker, fingers tightening around him. Simon whimpers and lurches into him, nails digging into Ralph's arm.

'Tell me when you're coming.' Simon nods frantically and moans quietly, hips jerking quickly.

'Shit - Ralph, I'm coming - damn, oh my _Go-od_.' Simon lets out a long groan, voice quivering, and spills onto Ralph's hand and dripping into his lap. Ralph kisses him quickly, stroking him down from the high as Simon quivers against him.

'Was that okay?'

'Yes,' Simon plants a soft kiss on his jaw, then watches while Ralph sucks his hand clean, biting the inside of his cheek, 'Do you wanna keep going?'

'I mean, yeah, but don't you wanna rest for a bit?' Simon nods, and Ralph leans back against his headboard, holding Simon against his chest. His still-hard cock presses against Simon's thigh, and he shifts to rub his thigh over it. Ralph moans quietly.

'Si,' He whispers, and Simon smiles up at him innocently.

'Yes?' Ralph curses under his breath.

'You're gonna be the death of me, y'know?' Simon smiles, kisses his pulse.

'You don't have to come in me. I could use my mouth or... Keep doing this?' Ralph pulls back, running his thumb over his bottom lip.

'God, I want to fuck you. But... Your mouth _would_ feel good.'

'What ever will you do?' Simon whispers tauntingly.

'Maybe you should use your mouth, so you would shut up.' Ralph murmurs back and playfully bites his earlobe.

'Maybe I should.' Ralph thinks about his option, then shrugs a shoulder.

'Another time,' He hums, reaching for the lotion again, uncapping it, 'Wanna keep going?' Simon nods, raising himself onto his knees and twisting to watch Ralph slather more lotion over himself. Then, he positions himself, and lowers himself down carefully, humming in pleasure. Ralph sits up and draws him close, moving his hips up into him slowly.

'God, this is amazing.' He whispers into his hair, and Simon smiles in victory, moving his own hips in response, seeking to give Ralph a good orgasm.

'You're amazing.' Simon replies, kissing the side of his head softly. Ralph grips his waist tighter, moves his hips in quicker, less controlled movements. Simon holds him close, letting him chase his climax, kissing his ear and moaning into the shell of it quietly.

'God, Si, the sounds you make are so fucking pretty.' Ralph mumbles, voice hoarse. Simon grins and just moans again in response, feeling his cock twitch in him. He rocks back against Ralph quickly, nails pressing on his shoulderblades.

'Keep going, Si,' Ralph moans, hips jerking up into him, 'God, I'm gonna -' His sentence ends in a moan, and it's all the warning that  Simon gets before Ralph spills in him, holding him close and biting at his shoulder. After two harsh thrusts, they both stay still, breathing heavy, and Ralph doesn't pull out until his catches his breath. Simon rolls off of him and slumps back on the bed, tired and spent.

'Was that good for you?' Ralph whispers, pulling him against his side and pulling his covers over their bodies, 'Because it was great for me.' Simon nods and rolls onto his stomach, yawning.

'You didn't leave any marks.' He mumbles around the yawn.

'Don't think you're mine to mark.'

''m not,' Simon pauses, then peeks up at Ralph, 'I could be.'


	8. I.ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a continuation of the long distance au.
> 
> or
> 
> reunion sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i had entirely planned to have this au as a standalone fic, but as i was planning it, i didn't like ANY of the ideas i or my friends came up with, and overall it was just repititive and melodramatic and not what i wanna publish???
> 
> but i did like how i was gonna end the fic
> 
> so here, have the beginning and the end of a fic that will never happen. happy early easter if you celebrate it

It had taken Jack way too long to get the time that Ralph would come back from New York. Ralph hadn't answered his text or call, his step mother wasn't sure but gave him the general window of 'early afternoon'. Which left him with his last option - Ralph's father. He never liked the man, but he especially despised him after he had sent Ralph across the ocean because he had gotten less than 80% on a test. It took twenty minutes over an overpriced lunch, but Jack finally weaseled the times from the man, resisted punching him in his stupid face, and had left to pick up some flowers for his boyfriend.

Which puts him in Heathrow Airport, twenty minutes before Ralph's plane was supposed to land, clutching a bouquet of roses and standing apart from Ralph's father and step mother. He knew that Ralph was allergic to some flower, but it made him insanely guilty that he couldn't remember which. What he did remember though, was getting him roses for Valentine's Day that winter. Ralph had kept them in a vase on his dresser until they wilted, so Jack figured they were a safe bet to buy.

Forty minutes later, and his phone finally chimes with the sound he had set to Ralph's contact. He pulls his phone out quickly, chewing on his cheek.

Just got my luggage. Will be out soon.

The text was obviously rushed, but nothing could've filled Jack with more relief. He wanted to push forward and meet Ralph there, kiss him tender, then take him home and fuck him senseless. But he stays planted in place, practically vibrating when the passengers come around the corner. Ralph looks exhausted, toting his suitcase behind him as he scans the crowd. He spots his father first, and gives him a terse smile and awkwardly kisses his step mother's cheek when he reaches them.

Then, he glances in his direction, looks back to his father when he says something, then doubles back, face lighting up and all signs of exhaustion melting. He lets go of his suitcase and sprints the short distance, knocking into Jack at full tilt. The impact almost sends them toppling, but Jack just staggers and wraps his arms around him, pressing his nose into his hair as Ralph clings to his neck and presses several desperate kisses to his jaw and cheek.

'God, I missed you so fucking much.' Ralph whispers, voice thick, and Jack just laughs softly, breathing in sharply through his nose. Ralph smelt different - different shampoo, different cologne. Different Ralph, he was sure.

'Your voice sounds so different over the phone.' He manages, and Ralph sniffles and laughs. Jack tightens his arms around him, making the cellophane wrapped around the roses crinkle. The sound catches Ralph's attention, and he pulls back, noticing the flowers for the first time, smiling up at Jack with tear-filled eyes.

'You got me flowers?' Jack flushes, looks away.

'Uh... Yes? I mean, if you don't like 'em...' Ralph pushes at his chest, then pulls him down by the collar of his shirt to kiss him, taking the roses and stroking his face. Ralph's step mother's timid voice cuts into the moment.

'Jack? Would you like to join us for lunch?' Jack is about to accept, eager to spend as much time with Ralph, when the blond interjects.

'Actually, I was hoping that the lunch could, y'know, wait?' Ralph's father looks like he's about to object, but Ralph purses his lips and continues before the man can speak, 'Because, father, I kinda haven't seen my boyfriend for six months, and I'd like to spend the day with him. Alone.' Ralph's father mimics his expression, then crumbles.

'Fine. We'll go out tomorrow. We'll leave your suitcase on your bed.' Ralph gives him another forced smile, takes Jack's arm in his, and leads him out of the airport.

Outside, Ralph draws him closer, smiling up at him with an edge of mischief in his eyes.

'The only good thing about that time in the States is that he's regretting it. Or, he wants me to stop being mad at him. I can get a lot of mileage out of this. A month minimum.' Jack smiles, runs his hand through the blond strands, then hails a taxi.

'Well... You won't need that long of mileage, do you? Only two months, right?'

'Hm?'

'Your birthday - it's in August.'

'So?' A taxi pulls up, and Ralph smiles at him like he knows exactly what he means. Jack climbs into the taxi, gives the cabbie his address, and sighs in Ralph's direction.

'Do I have to spell it out? When you turn eighteen - in August, two months from now - we can find our own apartment. Jobs. You won't need to guilt your father to see me. We can have an actual life together.' Ralph takes his hand, kisses his knuckles, then rests his head on his shoulder.

'I'd love to.'

 

The cab ride is frustratingly long, especially when Ralph keeps kissing at his neck and whispering lewd things into his ear, not caring about the poor cabbie as he grips his thigh, fingers digging into his flesh.

'I want you, Jack.' Jack swears under his breath, carefully pries his hand from his thigh when he realizes it's edging closer to his crotch.

'Not here, baby. I'll get a boner.' He whispers, kissing his temple. He feels Ralph smile against his neck, then nip at his pulse point.

'So? I'll take care of it.' Jack swallows a groan, and takes Ralph's hand in his, holding tight.

'Just wait 'til we get to my house. Please, baby?' Ralph sighs in resignation, and kisses his jaw, mumbling something along the lines of reluctant agreement.

 

Finally, they pull up in front of Jack's house, he pays the cabbie, smiling in a weak apology.

Ralph drags him from the back seat, then pulls him up the step. Jack presses him against the front door as he pulls his keys from his pocket. He bites at the shorter boy's bottom lip while unlocking the door, then herds him into the house, closing the door with his foot. Ralph tugs him down the hall and into his room, leaving his roses on the chair by the door. Jack kisses him again, then locks his door as Ralph falls onto the bed.

'God, I forgot how uncomfortable your bed is.' He murmurs, pulling his jumper over his head. Jack laughs, climbing on top of him, taking his face in his hands.

'It's be a lot more comfortable with you in it.' Jack whispers, kissing at his neck. Ralph hums, pulling him close and kissing his ear. Jack tugs at his belt, working his fingers under the strap of leather. 'Take your trousers off.' He pulls his belt free for him, pulling his shoes off while Ralph removes his trousers and briefs. Once he's naked under him, Jack sits back and addresses all the changes to his looks from the last six months spent apart.

He had gotten a haircut - but he knew that. Ralph had sent a picture of it the afternoon he had it done. His skin was tanner than it was before he left, and there was a faint spattering of freckles across the bridge of his nose. He had lost weight, which didn't surprise Jack either. To him, it seemed that all he did in the States was work out and study and call him.

Jack traces his fingers over the contours of his stomach, bending to kiss the freckles.

'If you had spent any longer over there, we would match.' He murmurs, and Ralph hums, wraps his arms around his neck.

'If I had spent any longer over there, I would've died.' Jack runs his fingertips over his arms, then pulls away to take off his shirt, tossing it away. Ralph runs his hands over his torso, leaning up to kiss him softly.

'I love you so much, Jack.' Ralph whispers, and Jack smiles, tugs him close.

'The feeling is mutual.' He traces his lips along the warm curve of the blond's neck, twirling a piece of hair around his index finger. Ralph hums in delight, sliding his hands down his hips, hooking his thumbs under the edge of his jeans. Jack unbuckles his belt, tossing it to join his shirt. Ralph pulls back to look at him, eagerness bright in his eyes. His hands tremble whilst he pulls the fly of his jeans down, then pushes them down around his knees. Jack kicks them off, then pushes them off the bed with his foot as Ralph shifts forward.

'Sit back.' Ralph's voice is hushed and hoarse, and Jack draws his brows in close.

'Why?'

'I wanna taste you.'

'I haven't done anything but jerk off for six months. I won't last two seconds.'

'So? We can wait for you to be ready again.' Jack heaves a dramatic sigh, sitting back and splaying his legs out. Ralph grins, sitting forward on his hands and knees, leaning forward. He kisses his stomach gently. Jack regards him fondly, tracing his fingertips over his temples. Ralph leans down, kissing the head lightly. Jack gasps, his length hardening embarrassingly quickly, making Ralph smile up at him before taking the head in his mouth, sucking gently. Jack curses quietly, running his fingers through his hair.

'God, I've missed that mouth.' Ralph doesn't reply, taking more of him into his mouth, pressing at the underside of his cock with his tongue. Jack lurches forward, biting his thumb in an attempt to hold himself back from release.

Ralph pulls back, smiles up at him coyly, then takes all of him into his mouth at once, lips tight around his cock. That's all it takes for Jack to spill into his mouth, moaning loudly as he grips at his head. Ralph pulls away, swallows, and wipes his mouth before stroking him down as Jack catches his breath.

'Fuck. Sorry.'

'Don't apologize. I liked it.' Ralph kisses his forehead, then falls back on the pillow. Jack crawls over him, moving to return the favour. 'No. I wanna come when you're in me.'

'You can. You'll be ready by the time I am.'

'Jack. Please. Can we just lie in your bed for a bit?' Jack nods, then rolls off him, crowding onto the single pillow, lying on his side. Ralph turns towards him, propping his face on a forearm.

'I wish it was earlier.' Jack murmurs, and Ralph smiles in confusion.

'Why?'

'You look prettiest in the morning,' Jack pulls him close and pushes his face into his neck, 'Of course, you're pretty all the time.' He feels Ralph wrap his arms around him, press into him.

'Never ever be away from me for this long ever again.' His voice is strangled, like he's about to start crying, and Jack presses a soft kiss to his jaw.

'Technically, you were the one who was away. But you know.' Ralph smacks his shoulder, lightly, his laugh thick with tears not yet fallen.

'Don't be a dick when I'm trying to be cute.' Jack grins, sucks a mark onto his jaw. Once, Ralph would've objected, but he's beyond caring where Jack leaves his hickeys.

'Can I get you off? I like being this close to you - imagine what it'd be like to make you come like this,' Ralph frowns, but can't help but warm to the idea, 'Please?' Jack kisses the hickey, and Ralph hums, tugging him closer, settling his forehead on his cheek.

'Okay,' He whispers. Jack hums, nudging his shoulder.

'Look at me, 'kay?' Ralph nods, settling back onto the pillow. Jack reaches between them, wrapping his hand around his length gently, stroking him slowly. Ralph hums, running his hand up his arm, rolling his hips into his hand. Jack kisses him carefully, speeding up his movements. A tiny moan leaves Ralph as he tightens his fingers over the bend of his elbow, pushing his forehead against Jack's.

'Fuck,' Ralph mutters, then laughs shakily, 'God, I missed this.' Jack kisses his cheekbone quickly, running his thumb over the sensitive head. Ralph moans loudly, lurching against him, 'Shit - please don't. I'll come.'

'So? I came quickly.'

'Yeah, but you've barely touched me.' Ralph's chest is heaving already, his face flushed and his eyes clouded. Jack smooths his thumb over his cheekbone, smiling softly.

'Of course. I'll just jerk you off,' He kisses his brow, 'You're so beautiful.'

'Thank you.' Ralph whispers, and Jack wonders what he's thanking him for, but pushes the thought away and adjusts himself to get a better angle, stroking Ralph gently yet quickly. He leans in, kisses along his jaw, murmuring praise into his skin.

'God, baby. You're so good. So good, so pretty. Just - you're incredible. I love you so much, fuck.' Ralph whimpers, pushing his nose against his cheek.

'I'm close. God, Jack, _shit_ , I'm so close.' Jack grins, slowing down his movements.

'Look at me, sweet boy. I wanna see your face as you come.' Ralph pulls back just as he orgasms, mouth curling around a loud cry of Jack's name as he grips at his shoulder, quivering against him as he spills down the inside of Jack's leg. Jack slowly stops stroking him, kissing him, long and loving.

'I love you, Jack.' Ralph whispers, voice shaking. Jack just smiles, wraps his arms around him, and rolls onto his back, touching his cheeks.

'What do you wanna do now, beautiful?' Ralph shrugs, rests his cheek on his chest.

'Eat?'

 

Jack has little food in his house - his mother was due to go grocery shopping that night. He and Ralph end up sharing a package of strawberry Pop Tarts. He eats half of his, then gives the rest to Ralph, kissing his shoulder.

'We'll order something for dinner, if you want.' Ralph nods, settling back against him after he finishes.

'Wasn't that hungry anyways.' He murmurs, taking Jack's hand, kissing the rough skin of his knuckles. Jack rests his chin on his shoulder, humming quietly.

'You want anything else?'

'You.' Jack smiles, runs his hands over his forearms.

'And you have me. Why else would I let you sit in my lap, naked, in the middle of my living room?' Ralph snorts, turning his head to kiss between his brows.

'Can we go back upstairs? I can sit in your lap, naked, and you can finally fuck me.' Jack grins, nodding and tapping his fingers over Ralph's hips.

'Sounds good to me.'

 

They're back in Jack's room in record time. Ralph straddles his waist, pushing his hands up the length of his chest slowly, meeting Jack's eyes. Jack blindly searches for the bottle of lube, then haphazardly coats his length in a layer of it, leaning up to kiss Ralph. The blond sits back, and bites his lip as he sinks down on top of him, and Jack moans loudly, gripping his hips. Ralph leans down close, kissing along his jaw. Jack kisses the spot just below his ear, whispering praise into his skin as he slowly thrusts up into him. Ralph runs his hands over his ribs, moving against him.

'God, Ralph, baby, I missed this.' Jack whispers against his neck. Ralph nods quickly, kissing at his neck. Jack sit up, pulling away enough to look up at his face. 'You're amazing. Everything about you is just..... Perfect.' Ralph grips his shoulders and leans away, moving up and down on him briskly.

After a few moments of watching Jack, Ralph leans back in again, and presses his forehead to his, closing his eyes and making a small noise in the back of his throat. Jack grips his hips tighter and matches the pace that Ralph sets, murmuring his name over and over. Ralph cries out, loudly, and hugs him close. Jack kisses the side of his head, thrusting up into him quicker as he digs his fingers into his hips for leverage. He pushes his nose into his hair, breathing heavily.

'Shit - I'm close, baby. I'm so close.'

'Me too.' Ralph murmurs, and Jack glances down the small space between their bodies, letting go of his hips with one hand to stroke him gently, kissing him. Ralph moans into the kiss, moving his hips as best he can into his hand. Jack pulls back, resting his forehead on his shoulder, hips faltering in their movements as he readjusts himself on the bed. He mumbles praise and sweet nothings into his shoulder as he chases his orgasm, stroking Ralph quickly as he snaps his hips up into him roughly.

Ralph comes seconds before he does, spilling onto his stomach with a cry, and the feeling of his climax brings Jack tumbling over the edge soon after. He bites down on his shoulder, muffling a groan of the other boy's name, and spills into him, thrusting weakly a few times to milk himself.

Ralph sits back, then gracelessly falls off his lap to lie beside him, chest heaving. Jack settles down and kisses his sweaty forehead.

'Was that good for you, baby?' Ralph nods, tiredly, pulls him down across him, and slings one arm across his back, the other around his neck.

'What about you?' He mumbles, kissing his hair, eyes closed.

'Good. So fucking good, baby.'

'Is it okay if I just take a quick nap?'

'Yeah.'

'A'ight,' Ralph tugs him closer and blindly reaches for the covers, 'Wake me up in a bit, yeah?'

'Yeah. Sleep well, baby.' Jack pulls the covers over them, smiles into Ralph's temple, and sighs in content.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since the last flight I went on was like... 5 years ago I couldn't remember if you got your shit from that spinning thing before or after you were like 'yo @ relatives i am back' i went wit before for storytelling sake.
> 
> also this also got kinda long oop


	9. VII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ralph flirts with someone at a bar to make Jack jealous. It works.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> set in my punk!jack and soft!ralph au bc im trash

Jack was late to picking up Ralph - only by 10 minutes, sure, but he knew that the shorter boy would be annoyed with him.

He pulls into the parking lot for the bar across from the library Ralph worked at, then slips into the squat building, searching the space quickly. Like a beacon, Ralph's light blue shirt sticks out against the warm wood that filled the bar. He sits at the bar, looking bored as some asshole talks to him. Jack has a feeling that it isn't the first time that he checks his phone, rolls his eyes, and glances towards the door. In doing so, their eyes meet, and Ralph smiles at him, slyly, then turns to the guy beside him, smile turning warm as he laughs at something he says, and lays his hand on his arm. Jack can't hear him at this distance, but it's easy enough to read his lips.

'You're so funny!' The guy grins, obviously pleased with himself, running his finger over Ralph's hand, saying something else. Ralph bites his lip, looking over to Jack quickly, then looks back to the brunet, leaning in and murmuring something into his ear. Jack feels his heart seize as the brunet turns his face and says something back, making Ralph blush and... _giggle_.

He pushes past a group of girls, standing in a clump with drinks in their hands, and marches to the bar. Ralph pulls his hand away, but doesn't straighten up.

'Hi, baby.' He says, as if he didn't look as though he was two seconds from kissing this asshole. Jack looks between the two, trying to figure out if he wanted to beat in this guy's face for even _looking_ at his Ralph in the first place, or push Ralph over the bar and fuck him hard. Instead, he just smiles, takes Ralph's face in his hands, and kisses him, a bit too roughly for this act.

'Hey. You ready to go?' Ralph smiles, and slides off his seat.

'Of course.' Jack glares at the guy over his head - _if looks could kill_ \- and wraps his arm around Ralph's shoulders, pulling him close, guiding him out of the bar.

As soon as they're outside, Jack presses him up against the rough brick, biting at his neck hard.

' _Fuck_ , Ralph, you're gonna be the end of me,' Ralph hisses in pain, but tilts his head to the side, 'Why can't you understand that you're mine?' He sucks a dark mark into his skin, making sure that it would last a good week.

'I know this, baby. I'm yours, and you're mine.' Jack pulls away, touches the mark, and frowns at him.

'Get in the car.'

 

The car is silent as he drives back to Ralph's house. Ralph had turned the radio on, but Jack had frowned at him, turned it back off, and turned back on the road, resting his hand on his thigh.

He pulls up into the driveway, peering into the dark house.

'No one is home.' Ralph murmurs, opening his car door.

'Good,' He turns to look at him, leaning in to kiss the mark, ''cause, pretty boy, I'm gonna fuck you so hard.' Ralph grins, scooting from his seat and sliding from the car. Jack hurries to catch up to Ralph, gripping his upper arm as he locks the car. Ralph bites his lip, hardly glancing at him as he pulls his keys from his pocket when they reach the front door. Jack presses up against him, nipping gently at the back of his neck, noting how the blond's hands shake as he fumbles with the keys. As soon as he gets it unlocked, Jack pushes him inside, then presses him up against the door, effectively pushing it shut.

'You can't possibly wait until we get upstairs?' Ralph whispers, half-drowned out by the lock clicking back into place. Jack raises a brow and glances down at the button up Ralph wears.

'How expensive is this?'

'Uh... 40 pounds.'

'I'll pay you back.' Jack whispers, and before Ralph can object, the buttons clatter to the floor around their feet, and Jack is kneeling, kissing down his chest. He whines, buries his fingers in his hair, and arches into him. Jack nips at his ribs, pressing his fingers into his hips. 'Stop whining. You're the one who flirted with the first boy you saw just to piss me off.'

'Did it work?' Ralph mumbles, voice breathy.

'What do you think?' Jack pulls his fly down, biting at his hip bones. Ralph yelps, gripping his hair tightly. Jack grins against the hollow of his hipbone, pushing him forward against the door.

'I think... that you should suck me off.'

'Is that so?' Ralph nods, biting his lip, 'Why? Wouldn't you consider that a reward? What have you done to earn a reward?'

'I... look nice?' Jack snorts.

'You always look nice. That isn't a great feat that you need to be rewarded for.' Ralph whines, presses down on his head.

'Please? I won't ask you for anything else tonight, promise.' Jack sits back on his heels, examining Ralph's face for a long moment. Then he hums, tugging his trousers down around his knees, his briefs soon following.

'Since you asked so nicely.' Jack pumps him with his hands a few times, scooting closer, 'You're already pretty hard. Do I turn you on that much?' He grins when Ralph turns a pretty shade of pink. He leans in, kisses the head.

'Who says it was you?' Ralph says breathlessly, and Jack stops cold, looking dangerously up at Ralph.

'Don't go down a road if you don't like where you'll end up, baby boy. Maybe I should just go home.' Ralph flushes darker, and shakes his head quickly.

'No. Please. I'm sorry, I didn't mean it.' Jack hums, leaning past his hands to suck a dark mark onto his thigh.

'Do you enjoy getting me worked up?'

'No,'

'No? You just enjoy getting punished, don't you?' Ralph's face is red as a tomato by now, 'You don't fool me, Ralph. Under these nice clothes - you're just a dirty little boy who likes to get fucked.' After he says this, he takes Ralph into his mouth suddenly, all at once. He carefully runs his teeth over his cock, just hard enough that it would sting, making Ralph gasp and squirm, grip his hair tightly.

'Damn - Jack, watch it.' Jack looks up at him and does it again, slower this time, and Ralph winces, but bucks into his mouth. Jack grins as best he can around him, hollowing his cheeks around him and humming, making Ralph shudder under him.

He slides his hands up his stomach, slowly, then grips his wrists, hard enough to leave at least redness for a few days. Then, he bobs his head quickly, and Ralph weakly thrusts into his mouth, scrabbling at his hair.

'Keep going,' He hisses, 'I'm gonna... I'm gonna...'

'Tell me, baby.' Jack pulls back, leaning in to bite the mark he had left minutes before.

'I'm gonna... come. Please, Jack, don't stop.' Jack takes nothing more than his head into his mouth, suckling at it until Ralph cries out loudly and spills onto his tongue. Jack straightens up, takes his face in his hands.

'Open your mouth,' He murmurs around his mouthful. Ralph does as he does, opening his mouth by a fraction, and Jack leans in, kisses him, and pushes the mouthful of seed into his mouth. He pulls back, and bites his lip.

'Spit or swallow, I don't care.' Ralph looks conflicted, but ultimately swallows, meeting Jack's eyes. Jack all but growls, his cock twitching in his jeans when Ralph opens his mouth to show him. He kisses him again, gripping the sides of his neck, sinking to his knees. After a long time of allowing Jack to run his tongue over his teeth and the roof of his mouth, Ralph palms at him through his jeans.

He should stop him. He really should. But Jack was pent up - with the anger and jealousy and lust, it was so easy to allow him to get him off like this.

It happens embarrassingly quickly - He groans Ralph's name as he spills into his briefs. Ralph says nothing, but smiles up at him smugly, pressing close and kisssing him again. Jack allows him to take the reins on this one while he comes down from the short high.

They slide back down against the door and just sit, waiting until Jack's cock stops throbbing and he can think about actually fucking his boyfriend.

'Fuck - baby, where's your lube? I'll go get it.' Jack murmurs after a long moment, and Ralph jerks away so quickly that Jack fears he'll hit his head on the door.

'No - don't. Don't leave. Just... use your spit? Are you even ready?'

'I'm always ready when it comes to you,' Ralph glances over Jack's shoulder, chewing his lip, 'And I don't wanna hurt you. Not like that.'

'Uh. Okay. Follow me.' Ralph steps out of his trousers and slips into the kitchen, and Jack follows as he rifles through the cabinets and comes up with a bottle of olive oil. He hands it to Jack, then leans over the counter island. Jack grins, opens his belt and pushes his jeans and briefs down his thighs, stroking himself back up to hardness, then messily coating his length with the oil.

'You do know that you'll never look at this counter the same way, right?' Jack whispers in his ear, teasing his entrance.

'Just like I can't look at the pub bathroom in the same way, or my father's office?'

'Yup.' With no other warning, Jack pushes in, and Ralph moans, reaching back to grip his arm. Jack leans down over him, grasping his hips tightly and bites at his shoulder. Jack pulls halfway out, then thrusts into Ralph so suddenly that he lurches forward, scrambling to catch himself on his elbow.

'Are you... you gonna take your clothes off?'

'Why?'

'I wanna... feel you. Closer.' Ralph glances at him, lip trembling. Jack leans over, nips at his bottom lip.

'Only when you're good, baby,' Jack murmurs, kissing the lip gently, 'Besides, I thought you weren't gonna ask for anything else?' Ralph whines, resting his forehead on the counter. Jack grins, kissing the back of his neck and rolling his hips into him at a quick, controlled pace, hands moving to close over his waist, fingers pressed harsh into his skin.

Ralph winces, reaching back to grip his wrist.

'Don't be as rough. I'll bruise.'

'That's kinda the point.' Jack murmurs, but stoops to kiss his upper back in an unspoken apology regardless. Ralph doesn't let go of his wrist, moans into the counter when Jack angles his hips differently, moving back against him. The taller of the two runs the tips of his fingers down his waist and he grips the blond's hips, dragging him closer and using the better angle to go harder, deeper.

Ralph cries out into the lacquered granite and scrabbles at the counter with his free hand, whimpering Jack's name into the cold stone. Jack glances down at him, taking a fistful of hair, giving it an experimental tug. This makes Ralph moan louder, and Jack grins in victory, pulling him up by the hair, careful not to yank too hard. Once the blond is flush with his front, Jack bites the shell of his ear.

'Dirty boy.' He whispers, then releases his hair and pushes him back down onto the counter, thrusting rough and hard, his climax mounting too quickly for his liking. Ralph groans into the counter, knees buckling under him. Jack holds him up, leaning down and biting his shoulder as he spills into him again.

 

After a few moments of lying dazed against the counter, Ralph straightens up and smiles back at him.

'Did I just make you come twice?'

'Fuck off,' He notices the small puddle of seed on the countertop, 'I didn't even have to touch your cock to get you to come.' He kisses the deep bite mark, just bordering on bleeding, and releases Ralph's hips, watching in satisfaction as he stumbles.

As he's zipping himself back up, ignoring the mess in his briefs for now, Ralph whisks past him, as graceful as ever, acting as though he wasn't naked and he didn't just get fucked so well that his knees gave out. Pretending as though his drool and come wasn't drying on the counter steps away from them. On the way into the hall to get dressed again, Ralph pauses, grasps his sensitive cock, and smirks.

'Still made you come twice.' He whispers, then disappears into the hall.


	10. VIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a longer fic for my actor!ralph/photographer!jack au bc my fave

When Jack first meets Ralph Gornick, he's fresh out of film school, and he's just been hired by an up-and-coming company that would do any kind of photography under the sun. Jack is partly glad that he didn't have to go and take some weird artsy pictures of some naked girl just yet. A promotional photo shoot for some movie was easy.

Or so he thought.

 

The day goes by as smoothly as it could when the main actress was some prissy little girl who stomped around and yelled more than she actually talked. Jack keeps to himself, trying not to snap at her when she makes a big show of getting in her car and driving to the nearest Starbucks, which was literally across the street, when her poor assistant got her order wrong. He flicks through the pictures he's already taken, sighing.

'God, she's such a bitch.' Jack jumps when someone speaks behind him, and he spins around to find Ralph Gornick, the main actor, standing behind him.

' _Fuck_ \- Yeah. All actors are difficult.' He says, not bothering to check himself as he turns back to his camera. The blond scoffs behind him, and he can feel him lean in to look over his shoulder.

'Not all of us.' His breath is warm on his neck, and Jack tries not to blush, swallowing when he reaches under his arm, taking his camera from his hands, peering at the display as he flicks past the pictures to the personal photos that Jack had yet to upload to his laptop yet. He smiles, soft, and Jack turns away quickly, busies himself with adjusting his tripod to a higher position, nowhere near brave enough to look and see what photo he's looking at. After a few moments, Ralph returns it to him, back at the most recent picture he's taken, and wanders away, leaving Jack to deal with his burning cheeks and his heart, hammering in his chest.

 

After the shoot has wrapped up, and everyone else has cleared out, Jack is left alone in the studio, packing away his things. Soft footsteps come up behind him, and he's startled for a second time that day when a voice he's quickly familiarizing himself with comes from behind him.

'You have a card?'

'What?' Jack turns to find the blond standing way too close to him, and his face heats again as he pulls his bag onto his shoulder.

'I like your shit.' Ralph shrugs a shoulder, and Jack's mouth goes dry as he hurriedly digs through his bag to pull one out, holding it out to the blond.

'Here.' Ralph straightens up as he scans over it, lips curling into another soft smile.

'Cool,' He pockets the card, and begins walking out, 'I'll be seeing you, Jack Merridew.'

Jack can't stop thinking about the way he says his name.

_Oh, the things he would do to Ralph Gornick, if he had the chance._

 

* * *

 

 

Jack doesn't see Ralph in person for another two weeks. He doesn't really do anything for those two weeks except take pictures out of his window and upload them to his blog. But Roger convinces him to come out to some party - his friend wasn't even a party person, what the hell was he doing? - at a beach by his apartment. He even mentioned that a few celebrities would be around. If he was gonna go out and do something, might as well get paid for it.

Roger meets him outside his apartment, not failing to notice the camera.

'God, Merridew. Can't you leave your work at home for once?'

'Gotta pay the bills somehow, man.' Jack rolls the sleeves of his hoodie up and leads the way across the street and to the beach.

 

He's gotten a good amount of candids, both for his boss and for his own blog, when someone taps his back.

'Hey, stranger.' Jack turns so quickly to find Ralph, beaming up at him. He has a drink in one hand and his phone in the other, dressed in swim trunks and a t-shirt. He doesn't have any shoes on, and Jack briefly wonders if he came like that.

'Hey.' Ralph's eyes are scanning him, intense and boring into his skin. It makes him feel small and naked, so he rolls his sleeves down.

'Are you like, homeless, or do you always look like this?' Just like he had on that day, he had gathered his curls into a small ponytail, keeping it out of the way. He hadn't really looked at what he put on, but when he gives himself a quick once-over, he doesn't even look that bad.

'Not everyone can afford designer clothes, Gornick.' Without thinking, he tugs at the hem of his shirt, and raises a brow. Ralph flushes pink, and Jack really wants to take a picture of it, save it in the folder of his favorite pictures, and never forget how he looks.

'Right.' He manages lamely, and Jack snorts, taking out a cigarette, lighting it as he meets Ralph's eyes. Jack expects him to be the type to make a face and leave, and he _really_ hopes that he'll do just that. He doesn't want to deal with the way he makes him feel. Not right now. Instead, he just wets his lips, and starts again.

'I looked at your stuff. On your blog.'

'Yeah?' Jack is surprised at how laid back he feels, especially when the music is so loud that he can feel it through his shoes. He hasn't had anything to drink yet, and the cigarette wasn't even laced with anything other than nicotine.

'Yeah. I really like it. The stuff I saw on your camera doesn't even compare, man.'

'Thanks.' Jack takes a long drag, then offers it to Ralph. To his surprise, the blond takes it.

'Why don't you just work for yourself? You've got the talent.'

'It isn't that easy, pretty boy.' _God, where did that come from? _Ralph doesn't react to the nickname, and hands the cigarette back.

'I know. But I've got a feeling about you.' Jack scoffs, and Ralph thankfully directs the conversation away.

'Are you here for work?' He asks, pointing at his camera in his hand.

'A friend invited me out, but I figured that I might as well get paid for this shit if I'm gonna be bothered. I live close, anyways.' Ralph finishes his drink and sets his cup down on a nearby table.

'Nice. It must be great to live this close to a beach.'

'Nah. I'm not into... The beach.' Ralph raises a brow, and Jack tilts his head towards the bar in an unspoken question. Ralph follows him when he steps up and orders a drink, glad that it was free.

Five drinks later, Jack is helping Ralph into the elevator of his building, hoping that he wouldn't vomit all over him. The elevator dings when they reach his floor, and he drags him down the hall and into his apartment. Ralph falls onto his bed, and Jack pulls the covers over him, putting a bucket by the bed, along with a bottle of water and an Advil. He texts Roger as he falls onto his couch, slinging an arm over his face, not bothering to look at the reply when his phone chimes. He drifts off to sleep then, arm slung over his face.

 

He wakes up from his fridge opening and closing loudly, and then a wince. Jack groans, sitting up suddenly, rubbing his eyes as he looks into the kitchen. Ralph stands in front of the fridge, an apple in one hand, looking horrible. 

'You didn't have to sleep on the couch.' He mumbles, walking over and sitting beside him.

'Yes I did. You were drunk.'

'What, did you think that I would come onto you?' Jack flushes, but doesn't say anything. He can feel Ralph edge closer, feel his breath on his neck again. 'Or did you think you were gonna come on to me?' Jack stands suddenly.

'I'm gonna... I need to shower.' Ralph leans over, propping his elbow on the arm of the couch, and smiles up at him. Even with the redness in his eyes and the dark bags under them, the mussed hair, the smile looks damn near sultry. Like, if Jack didn't know any better, an invitation.

'Alright,' Jack retreats into the hall, and almost misses it when Ralph speaks again, 'I can wait.'

He's gone when Jack comes back out, hair dripping onto his shoulders. Jack doesn't know how to feel about that.

 

* * *

 

Jack doesn't hear from Ralph for another two months. He does quit his job - not because of what Ralph said, of course. That would be sad and way too brash, even for Jack. He had been meaning to go solo for a long time.

He had been getting off well, getting hired for a few photo shoots that are more his style, when he gets an email from some director who wants to hire him to shoot some indie film he was making. The pay was good, and the guy had apparently gotten some big actor to play the main role. Although film wasn't Jack's chosen art, he wasn't going to turn this down. He says yes, and ends up where he is now, empty handed on a film set that probably cost half the film's budget to rent. The director, a man named Adrian Greene, told him that he would have everything ready for him. Which Jack was glad for - his camera was for taking pictures, not for shooting movies.

A bearded man in a button down shirt rounds the corner, looking up at Jack in surprise.

'Uh... Can I help you?'

'Are you Adrian?'

'Yes...?' Jack steps closer, holds out his hand.

'Oh! I'm Jack.' Adrian grins wide. His teeth are impossibly perfect - white, straight, and all around fake. He opens his arms, and pulls Jack into a bear hug.

'Awesome! Man, when I saw your stuff...' Jack carefully extracts himself from the hug, laughing nervously, '... I just knew you were a good fit for this. The actor showed me your stuff. He's in love with it. Or you, maybe.' The bigger man laughs, shows him around the corner he had come around.

'Who is it, by the way? Just curious.'

'You know Ralph Gornick?' Jack's heart stops, and his face heats up. Thankfully, Adrian's back is to him.

'Yeah, I know him.'

'He's friends with my nephew. Said he'd do me a solid and get some publicity. Trust me, kid, it'll be good for everyone around.' Jack can't quite focus on what's he's saying. All he can see is Ralph's smile, that morning where he stretched across his couch, unfairly beautiful and relaxed in the house of someone he didn't even know.  
They round the corner, and Jack doesn't have to imagine him anymore. He's there, all tired smiles and languid form. His blond hair is as messy as it was that morning, and by the way Jack was acting, it was as if they had fucked and this was some awkward meeting after Ralph left in the middle of the night. Ralph looks around, and smiles brightly, standing up and walking over.

'You stalking me or something, Gornick?' Jack asks as soon as Adrian wanders away, and Ralph's cheeks redden slightly, but he just continues to smile up at him, that same soft smile and those same intense eyes.

'Nah. I just did Adrian a solid, and he returned the favor.'

'Your terms to do this was that I worked on it?' Ralph's smile turns coy, and he finds some excuse to step around him, leaning up to whisper in his ear.

'How else would I get to know you?' Jack is convinced that he melts right then and there. Ralph touches his shoulder and walks away, smugness coming off him in waves.

Jack desperately hopes that he can think about anything other than Ralph when he goes to sleep that night.

 

* * *

 

Jack starts spending more and more time with Ralph, even after filming wraps. They have graduated from getting drinks with the rest of the cast and crew, to a few others, to just them, and now they even spend the night at each other's places, sometimes. Although Jack certainly wouldn't mind sleeping in the same bed as Ralph, he makes sure that they don't.

It's been two weeks since filming has wrapped, and Ralph is stretched across his couch, just like he had ages ago. But it's nearing midnight instead of late morning, and Jack sits on the floor by his head, pretending to watch a movie. Ralph is going through something on his phone, one hand resting on Jack's head. He runs his fingers through his hair, and Jack can't focus on anything other than how good it feels. He finally gives up trying to watch the movie, letting his head fall back and his eyes close. Ralph pauses, then keeps going.

'Can I tell you something?'

'Shoot.'

'I know that it's been months... But I can't stop thinking about that time you called me pretty boy.' Jack freezes, resists the urge to open his eyes.

'...Why?' Jack swears that his heart isn't beating anymore. His breath shakes and his voice is small, and he's still terrified of looking at Ralph.

'I think you know why.' The way Ralph's voice sounds makes Jack forget his fear. He opens his eyes, twisting so that Ralph isn't upside down. Ralph meets his eyes evenly, cheeks a nice color of pink.

'Tell me.' Jack whispers, edging closer. Ralph pushes his fingers through his hair again, and Jack has to wonder where all of this is coming from. He wasn't even drunk, and neither was Ralph. Why was Ralph telling him this? Why was Jack being so goddamned bold?

'The way you said it. Lots of people have called me that, to... Insult me? I dunno. But you said it like...' Ralph sits up, biting his lip, '...I wanna hear you call me that again.' Jack slowly rises to his knees so he can reach Ralph if... Anything happens. He wets his lips.

'Pretty boy,' He whispers, and Ralph's breath hitches, 'What did you think about when you were thinking about me?'

'I was... I thought about your mouth. How it would taste.' Ralph leans in, touching his bicep.

'What else?'

'Your eyes. Your... everything,' Jack leans up, running his finger up the inside of Ralph's wrist, 'Can I kiss you?'

'God, yes.' As soon as Jack says it, Ralph is surging forward, taking his face in his hands, pressing his lips to his. Jack leans up into it, grasping at his wrists. Ralph bites at his lip, scooting forward until he's sliding off the couch and into Jack's lap. Jack pulls away to gasp for breath, looking up at Ralph.

'You're so... Wow.' Ralph sits back, and Jack grips his hips, afraid that he'll stand and this moment will be over.

'Can I tell you what else I thought about?' Jack nods, eyes on his lips. They've gotten pinker, plumper, and Jack wants to kiss him until his lips are red and swollen. 'I thought about this...' He rolls his hips down, and Jack can't breathe, can't think, '... In me.' Jack freezes, meets Ralph's eyes.

'C'mere.' He whispers, and Ralph edges as close as he can get. Jack leans up, pressing little kisses to his lips, not giving him enough time to kiss back. 'You think about me fucking you?' Ralph nods, leaning forward, tugging at the little hair at the nape of his neck, 'How often?'

'Every... Every time I... When I jerk off... I pretend that you're the one who's touching me... Making me come.' Jack grins, doesn't bother hiding his growing erection.

'I could... I could fuck you, if you wanted. I could fill you so fuckin' well, pretty boy. Touch you while doing it.' Ralph leans into him, nods eagerly.

'Yes. Yes, fuck, please. Please.' Jack lets go of his hips, and Ralph scrambles from his lap, holding out his hand to help him up, practically vibrating, tugging him down the hall when he stands.

 

They bang into his bedroom, Ralph tumbling back onto his bed, somehow still so graceful when he hurriedly pulls his shirt off. Jack pulls his arms from his hoodie, then pulls his shirt over his head, crawling on top of the blond. He touches the smaller boy's lips gently, biting his own.

'God, your mouth. I've wanted to kiss you for so long.' Ralph smiles up at him, opens his mouth and sucks at his finger. Jack makes a small noise at the back of his throat, not quite a moan.

'Why did you wait?' He mumbles around his finger, then releases it, tugging Jack closer.

'I dunno,' Jack pushes Ralph's hair from his face, then cups his cheek softly, running his thumb over his bottom lip, 'All I know is, I don't wanna ever stop kissing you.'

'Then don't,' Ralph knots his fingers into his curls, tugging him close, 'Please don't.'  
This kiss is softer, slower, and Jack takes his time when he runs his hands over Ralph's torso. Ralph shifts under him until he's sitting up against the headboard of Jack's bed, pulling him along. Jack kisses Ralph until he makes a small noise, breaking away to breathe.

'Do you have any lube?' Ralph whispers, pressing up into him.

'Uh... Yeah. Yes. One sec,' Jack extracts himself from Ralph, getting off the bed to go to his dresser, opening the top drawer and digging through his socks, 'It's been a while, so...' Ralph laughs behind him, and he can hear the sound of a belt being unbuckled hurriedly, then the rustle of clothes on his sheets. When he turns, he finds Ralph taking off his jeans, biting his lip. Jack sets the bottle of lube down and follows his example, walking over in his briefs.

'I've never been with a guy.' Ralph whispers when Jack climbs next to him. Jack kisses him gently, then pushes their foreheads together.

'I won't hurt you.'

'I know,' Ralph takes his hand, kisses his fingertips, 'I just want you to know. That you're my first.'

'Okay,' Jack leans in, kisses his Adam's apple gently, pulls at the leg of Ralph's briefs. Ralph lifts his hips, allows him to pull them down his thighs. He pulls the briefs off, sitting back to look at Ralph. 'Fuck. You're... you're prettier than I imagined.' Ralph flushes, meets his gaze.

'You thought about me?'

'Every night.' Jack leans in, pulling him up, kissing his jaw.

'Did you dream about me?'

'More than I would like to admit.' Ralph laughs, hooking his thumbs under the waistband of Jack's briefs, tugging them down. He throws them across the room, sitting back.

'Lemme see you.' Jack pulls away, and Ralph glances down, then back up, biting his lip as he touches him. Jack gasps, rolling his hips down into his hand. Ralph grins, free hand resting on the back of his head, fingers tangling into his hair.

'The things I could do to you -' Jack whispers into his ear, '- I wanna hear you moan. Bet your moans are so pretty. I wanna fuck you until all you can do is moan.' Ralph twists his head to nibble on the shell of Jack's ear, running his hand up his stomach. He opens his mouth against his ear and moans quietly. Jack's breath hitches, and his cock twitches against Ralph's thigh when he whispers into his ear hotly.

'What are you waiting for?'

 

* * *

 

The morning after, Jack is surprised to wake up to his cheek pressed to the side of someone's head, hair in his mouth and tickling his nose, staring at an out-of-focus ear. He shifts back, and arms tighten around his waist .

'Don't.' The voice is muffled by his chest, but Jack still recognizes it, all confusion and tiredness wiped from his thoughts.

'Shit - Ralph, God, I'm so sorry -'

'What are you sorry for? Waking me up?' Ralph pulls back to look at him, and Jack loves how disheveled he looks, recalls how he looked when he was riding him, cheeks tinged pink with arousal and hesitation.

'Do you - Do you regret what we did last night?' Ralph looks genuinely surprised - he even laughs.

'Jack, last night was incredible. You're incredible,' Ralph kisses his cheek, then stills, 'Do... do you regret it?' Jack hurries to reply, tugging him closer.

'No! Fuck, no, I loved it. I would... You could hold a gun to my head, and I still wouldn't take it back.' Ralph settles against his chest, fidgeting for a few moments to find a comfortable position.

'That's a little drastic, don't you think?' Jack smiles, settling onto the pillows, staring up at the ceiling.

  
'I _am_ conflicted, though.'

'Oh?' Jack runs his nail just along his spine, making Ralph shudder under his touch.

'Yup,'  Ralph rests his chin on his sternum, meeting his eyes, 'You see, you're just so pretty. I wanna take a million pictures of you, but I also just want you all to myself. See my plight?' Ralph laughs, pretends to ponder the issue.

'I mean, you can always take the pictures, and then not publish them. It's a win-win situation. Also, if this ends in a horrible, ugly way, you have something to get back at me with.'

'It won't end in a horrible, ugly way, I'll tell you that.' Ralph hums.

'Do you want me to get your camera for you?' The blond whispers, half teasing. Jack considers the wide window, late morning light spilling into the room.

'I mean, the lighting is pretty good, considering.'

 

Jack straddles Ralph's waist, half naked. He snaps another picture, then plants his hand on his chest, leaning down to kiss him, long and hard.

'Y'know, I thought you were just giving me some weird photographer metaphor for fucking me again.' 

'I mean...' Jack tugs at his briefs with one hand, lifting his camera again.

'Jack,'

'Camera-shy?'

'Wouldn't you be?'

'Well, yes, but for different reasons.' Ralph gently pushes his arm away, biting his lip. Jack grins, shifting his camera away momentarily to kiss his chin. Ralph leans up into him, tugging at his hair. Jack leans back and touches one of the hickeys left the night before.

'How many pictures are you gonna take?'

'As many as it takes to fill a folder on my laptop. Not all at once, obviously.' Jack turns off his camera, setting it on the bedside table, looking over Ralph's body.

'You done for now?' Jack hums an affirmative, tracing his Adam's apple as he climbs off Ralph and lies beside him, supporting his weight with his elbow. Ralph takes his hand, kisses his fingertips, then slides his fingers through the spaces between his, grasping tightly. Jack scoots closer, pressing several small kisses all over his face, tightening his fingers around Ralph's.

'What's your plan for today, pretty boy?' He murmurs between kisses, then pulls him in for one more kiss, more lasting. He still pulls away when Ralph leans up into him, letting him chase after him with a noise of frustration.

'I dunno. Stay in your bed all day?' He gently pushes Jack back until he's lying flat on his back, climbing on top of him. Once again, Jack is reminded of the night before, and it's as if he can still feel his come, thick on his stomach and chest.

'What would we do in bed all day?' Jack whispers, playing dumb.

'Repeat of last night? I can tell you're thinking about it.'

'Hm?'

'Yeah. We could...' Ralph sinks down onto his forearms, bracing them on either side of Jack's head, '...kiss. Or we could fuck. Or you could just keep taking pictures, because I'm pretty sure you're the cutest thing I've ever seen when you do something you love to do.' It's Jack's turn to chase Ralph's lips, as he leans up to bite at his bottom lip, just as Ralph sits back. He's sure that he'd timed it.  'C'mon, Jack. You'll be missing out on a prime opportunity.' Ralph's hands slide up over his ribs, and Jack reaches up to take both hands, kiss the palms.

'Touch yourself. Make yourself come - I wanna watch.' Ralph bites his lip, ridding himself of his briefs. He hadn't fully taken them off the night before - they were half removed, left on one leg as Ralph sank back onto him and made the prettiest sounds that Jack had ever heard.

'What do you want me to do?'

'I dunno. What you usually do - just make sure to make those adorable little moans again,' He releases Ralph's hands, gripping his hips to support him instead, 'I can't get enough of them.' Ralph bites his lip, looks over Jack.

'I can't get enough of _you_.' He whispers in reply, straddling his legs and pushing his hands from his hips. 'No touching. You said you only wanted to watch, so no helping me get off.'

'Can I talk to you?' Ralph thinks about this, then nods, spitting into his hand.

'You use spit?'

'Not usually, no.'

'Do you want lotion or something?'

'Let me do my thing, Jack,' Ralph whispers, spreading the spit over his length, never looking away from Jack, 'If I need some lotion, I'll let you know.' Jack nods, wetting his lips.  
Ralph starts to stroke himself, slowly at first, getting himself to full hardness. He grips Jack's chest for support, fingers digging harsh into his skin as he grinds onto his thigh, moaning quietly.

'Louder.' Jack urges, sitting up to see him better. Ralph groans in reply, closing his eyes and leaning on his arm, rolling his hips down quickly, almost frantically.

'Talk to me,' Ralph asks, breathless already, 'I'm still tender from last night - I won't last long.' Jack shifts back, careful not to disturb Ralph on his perch.

'You're so beautiful, Ralph. So fuckin' amazing. Everything about you is just so... Wow.' Ralph whimpers, leaning forward to push his forehead to Jack's, lifting off his thigh in the process.

'Tell me more. I'm so close.'

'I love the way you look when you come. Someone could write novels and novels about it,' Ralph nips at his bottom lip, tugging at his hair with his free hand, 'The things you do to me, Ralph Gornick. You aren't even touching me, and I could come just looking at you.' With that, Ralph arches into him, spilling onto their stomachs as he cries out, slumping against him. Jack kisses his shoulder, hugs him close, helps him lie on his side. Ralph hugs him close, burying his face in his chest.

'That was the best orgasm I've ever had.'

 

* * *

 

 

Five months after that first night together, and the only time Ralph goes back to his place is to pick up more clothes. The tabloids were going crazy trying to figure out who this secret girl that Ralph was supposedly seeing was. Sure, it was annoying that Ralph had to look around before holding his hand in public, but Jack got it. It was like being in middle school all over again, but this relationship was better.

Now, Ralph sits at their breakfast bar, bleary eyed as he slowly works on a bowl of cereal and a mug of coffee.

'Hey, baby?' There's a grumble in response, and Jack glances over his shoulder as he digs through his bag, smiling at the blond, 'Can I give you something?' Ralph hums, supporting his face in his hand.

'I have morning breath.' He mumbles as Jack steps around, spins the stool towards him.

'I don't care.' Ralph smiles, and then lets Jack kiss him, even opening his mouth slightly. Jack takes his hand, pushes open his fingers, and sets the newly pressed set of keys in his hand, then curls his fingers over them again. Jack pulls back abruptly, frowning at him and then looking at the keys in his hand.

'Move in with me. Officially. We don't have to stay here, I know you think it's shitty. We'll find something bigger, bett-' Ralph kisses him again, wrapping his arms around his neck.

'Yes. Oh, god, Jack, why the hell did you take so fuckin' long?' Jack smiles, kisses him back.

'What about the apartment? We can find a new one.' Ralph pulls away, rubbing the sleep from an eye and turning back to his breakfast.

'I love this place. Even though I'm pretty sure there are rats.' Jack sits down beside him, and Ralph takes his hand.

'Can I tell you something?'

'Anything.'

'I love you.' Jack isn't exactly surprised by what he says - he's seen it in Ralph's eyes for a long time, knows that Ralph has seen it in his. He squeezes Ralph's hand.

'The ways you make me feel, Gornick,' Ralph is looking at him strangely, as if he's scared that he won't feel the same, even though Jack knows it's been as clear as day, 'I love you, too.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so here's the thing. before i started this i knew i would take a pause every time i hit a multiple of 10 to work on something else.  
> and the time has come for the first break!  
> the next chapter will probably take a few weeks so ya
> 
> im gonna focus on writing a heathers au that ive wanted to for a long time. it's a oneshot so far, but split into multiple 'chapters' if you will, and i plan to have it at a word count of 5k at least. but the next chapter of this is a request that'll probably be 1-2k so it won't take too long after that comes out
> 
> anyways, i just wanna say thanks for reading all my trash  
> u can follow me on [tumblr](http://savajack.tumblr.com) for updates!


	11. IX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The request I got from an anonymous asker on my tumblr was p vague and just asked for fluffy jalph.  
> so  
> wow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i literally had no plan for this I just went with wherever my mind went.  
> its hecka short but i literally just wrote 9k for one chapter of my heathers au leave me alone

Ralph is unable to sleep, staring up at the ceiling, even when Jack is snoring softly beside him, staring up at the ceiling. At one point, Jack shifts awake, and Ralph can just make him out in the light that comes in from the wide windows, glowing orange from the streetlights, as he reaches for the water bottle that he leaves on his side of the bed.

'You still awake?' Jack mumbles, and Ralph shrugs.

'Couldn't sleep.'

'What're you thinkin' about?' Jack wraps an arm across Ralph's shoulders, pulling him close. He kisses his temple, then pulls back and brushes a piece of hair behind his ear.

'Nothing, really. Just can't sleep.' Jack hums, rolling over so he half-hovers over Ralph, weight supported by an elbow, face cast in shadow as he presses lazy kisses to random parts of his face.

'You want me to tire you out?' He murmurs, and Ralph laughs quietly, wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling him down to nestle his nose into the crook of his neck.

'Is that all you think about?'

'You're all I think about.' Jack mumbles, rolling back onto his side and pulling the covers up over them.

'Ew. Anyway, you're practically asleep. You'd be out before either of us could come,' He presses closer, seeking his warmth, 'Just go back to sleep.'

'Not until you're asleep, too. I don't wanna deal with your cranky ass tomorrow.' Ralph grunts and Jack rests his chin on the top of his head, 'Let's just... Talk. We haven't done that in a while.'

'Talk? About what?' Ralph tugs back and squints up at Jack.

'Anything. How was your day?'

'You asked me that when I came home.' Jack laughs quietly, pressing him gently into the mattress. Ralph hums, and Jack rubs his thumbs over his cheeks.

'Um, okay. How about... How was your night?'

'Dinner was nice. The rest of the night was... boring, to say the least.' The blond rolls over, bringing Jack with him, and kisses him softly.

'Boring? I thought it was fun.'

'Fine. Evening, in general, was sweet. The night bit, as I said, boring.' Jack pulls back and leans down, biting at his collarbone and touching his hip, and running his thumb down his ribs. Ralph hums, curving into him slightly.

'Alright. I could live with that.' Jack whispers, kissing the spot where he bit. Ralph rests his cheek atop his head, and shifts his arms from around his neck to around his middle as he sways as best he can when he's still being herded into the soft pillows by Jack's slim hips.

'How about you? How's your day been?' Jack hums, kissing the dip in his collarbone.

'Well, I liked the part where I didn't have to work. I would've preferred if you had the day off too, obviously.'

'How come?'

'We've barely seen each other this week. I miss you.' Ralph laughs quietly, tugging him down so their bodies are pressed flush together.

'We still spend the nights together.'

'Yeah, but I still miss your face. You've always been asleep when I get home, and you're gone when I wake up.'

'I'm not asleep now.' Jack pauses in his path across Ralph's collarbone and sits back, reaching over to turn on the lamp. Ralph turns his face from the sudden bright light, rubbing his eyes. Jack looks down at him, tracing his index finger over his lips.

'I love you.' He hums, and Ralph turns back to him, giving him a small smile as he reaches up, touching his cheek.

'You're not so bad, yourself.' Jack sort-of snorts, more of a sharp exhale through his nose than anything else.

'Asshole.' He grunts and pulls away from him, settling on his side beside him. Ralph turns his head towards him, smile widening as he reaches for Jack's hand.

'I love you, too.' He whispers, turning onto his side and resting his cheek on his forearm. Jack shifts close and brushes through Ralph's hair with his fingers. The blond presses into his hand and smiles, eyelids fluttering closed as he sighs in pleasure. Jack bites his lip and rubs his thumb over the shell of his ear, then cups his jaw. When his hand stills, Ralph opens his eyes and pouts.

'I might've fallen asleep if you kept at it.'

'Do you want me to keep at it?' Ralph nods and shifts closer, watching as Jack reaches over him and turns off the light, and he murmurs his thanks as the room is plunged back into that faint orange light from the streetlights below.

His thin fingers push through his hair again, and Jack whispers sweet nothings to fill the silence as Ralph draws circles on his side.

'Close your eyes, baby.' Ralph doesn't want to look away from the soft, vulnerable expression on Jack's face, so he stares for a few more moments, memorizing it, then does as he's asked, pressing into his hand. Jack murmurs compliments and random things about him in a soft voice that fades into a murmur as Ralph relaxes.

Eventually, Jack stops, pulling him close to brush feather-light kisses along his cheekbones, temples, the bridge of his nose.

'I love you.' He whispers with each kiss, and Ralph smiles tiredly.

Jack's soft voice is the last thing he hears before he drifts off to sleep.


	12. X

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fillin out a request
> 
> -"We slept in the same bed for space reasons but now we’re just waking up and there’s something about your bleary eyes and mussed hair."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jack nd ralph are like mutual friends in this but they dont like???? really know each other. theyre just two thirsty hoes lmao  
> theres some background rogermon that is (again) used as a plot device

When Ralph had agreed to a trip down to Bath, he had expected that it would be just him, Charlie, and Simon, with maybe Simon's new boyfriend Roger tagging along. He did not agree to be crammed in the back seat with three more people than it was meant for.

Simon and Roger sit up front, and Ralph is crammed into the back of the car, along with Charlie, one of Charlie's work friends, and a friend of Roger's, who is introduced as Jack. Charlie and the other chatter away about whatever political science majors talk about, and Ralph desperately wishes that he hadn't put his headphones in his overnight bag.

The redhead beside him has music blasting through his own headphones, so Ralph sighs and taps his shoulder. Jack pulls one headphone out, looking annoyed about the interruption.

'You mind sharing?'

'You don't have your own?'

'They're in the trunk.' He looks as if he's gonna turn him away and replace the earbud, but then Charlie laughs loudly, obnoxiously. He looks across Ralph, then hands him the earbud grimly. The music is pounding and harsh, and Ralph knows it'll give him a headache eventually, but it sort of drowns out the sounds around him, and Ralph could deal with a headache if it came with that blessing. The redhead leans over to murmur in his ear.

'Not your style?' Ralph can hear the taunting smirk in his voice. He doesn't answer and leans back against the seat, staring out the window.

  


They pull up at a little restaurant for dinner, and Ralph returns the earbud. Jack climbs out of the car and stretches until his back cracks. The shirt he's wearing rides up enough to reveal a sliver of pale, freckled skin. Ralph can't help but stare. Jack catches him, and raises a brow, opening the door further for him, bowing mockingly. Charlie and his friend are still deep in their conversation, so Ralph climbs over the console and gets out from the driver's side. Just to be spiteful. Jack scoffs to himself, closing the door and pushing the earbud back into place. Ralph knocks on the window, leaning down to peer at the two that are still in the car. Charlie smiles and lifts a hand, so Ralph trails after Jack into the restaurant.  
  
 

'Didn't take you for a burger person.' Jack says when their food comes. Ralph looks up as he nibbles at a chip, and smiles around it.

'What did you take me for?'

'I dunno. Organic vegan salad person, I guess.'

'If I was someone like that, I would have to go without a meal.' Ralph says. Jack smirks and leans back against the booth, propping his arm across the back of the bench.

'I'm sure there's options.' He says, in a way that has Ralph thinking thoughts he would rather not voice.   
  


Back in the car, it's quieter than before. Charlie is sleeping off his meal, and his friend is absorbed in a book. Simon and Roger talk up front, quietly, holding hands. Jack still offers him the earbud. Ralph still takes it, leaning against him just enough that he would be the only one to take notice.  


The sun has just set when they pull up to their Bed & Breakfast. Simon abruptly twists in his seat, and addresses the passengers in the back.

'Oh, I forgot to mention. I only booked three rooms, 'cause I thought it would only be the four of us, so we'll have to go two a room.' Charlie wakes up at that, blinking the sleep from his eyes. Simon turns to him, and smiles. 'Since Harry is your friend, how about you two share a room?' Charlie shrugs, and Simon turns to Ralph and Jack. 'You two good?'

'Yeah, I'm fine bunking with Ralph.' Jack says, and Ralph smiles at his friend, reassuring. It only falters slightly when Jack touches his thigh when he pushes himself out of the car.

 

 

When they get into the room, they find that it's only one bed. Ralph blinks, scoffing.

'At least it isn't a twin size.' Jack says, dropping his overnight bag on one of the chairs. Ralph follows him in, shutting the door. Jack digs in his bag, then sits on the bed, a pack of smokes and a lighter in his hand. Ralph looks up to the no smoking sign above the door, and Jack laughs, lighting a cigarette. 'You won't tell, will you?' Ralph walks over and sits beside him, crossing his legs under himself. He takes the cigarette, takes a drag.

'Nah.' He says around the smoke, and Jack grins, taking the cigarette back.

'You're a surprising person, Ralph. First rock music, then burgers, now smoking? What would your mother say?' Ralph knows that mentioning his dead mother would kill the mood, so he just smiles slyly, and leans forward slightly.

'The same that yours says daily, I suppose.'

 

For all the suggestive smiles and poorly concealed flirting, nothing happens that night. They go to bed, lying on their backs, and five minutes after the lights go off, Jack's soft snores fill the room. Ralph takes a little longer to fall asleep, the warmth from the other boy practically radiating off him, inviting him in and making him colder. All Ralph does is turn onto his side, and close his eyes.

Ralph wakes up before anyone else would be awake, he was sure. Sometime in the night, Jack had rolled over to face him, and he was met with the other boy's face, inches from his own. He shifts away, then turns his attention to the window over Jack's shoulder. The sun hadn't even risen yet. He sighs and turns onto his back.

'Why am I not surprised that you're a morning person?' Ralph jumps, finding Jack's eyes open. They're bleary with sleep, and he yawns, stretching his arms over his head.

'Did I wake you?' He doesn't know why he's whispering.

'Yeah. But I'm a light sleeper, it's not your fault.' Jack's voice is hoarse and low in a way that makes Ralph's heart flutter and stomach squeeze.  
He rolls back onto his side, and Jack leans on his elbow to look down at him. His curls had been messy the day before, but they were unruly now, sticking out in ridiculous directions. Ralph resists the urge to smooth it down. Jack's hand rests on his thigh, and he seems to be looking for something in Ralph's face. Ralph doesn't notice that he's moving forward until their noses are almost touching. Jack doesn't pull back. He just smiles, eyes darting down to his mouth, then back to hold Ralph's gaze evenly.

'What's on your mind?' Jack doesn't answer, rubbing away any sleep that still clouds his eyes. Ralph shifts closer still, angling himself so their legs can tangle together. Jack lowers himself so their noses touch. Both hold still, barely blinking. Breath mingling. 'Jack?' Ralph manages, voice weak.

'Say my name again.' Jack whispers, and Ralph - in an odd burst of bravery, moves forward to kiss his ear, then put on a breathy voice, not unlike what he sounds like in the heat of the moment.

'Jack,' He moans quietly, and Jack shudders under him, hands going to his hips, gripping tightly. A quiet cry leaves Ralph when they're rolling over, and Jack is above him, hands pushing his shirt up over his stomach.

'Can I kiss you?' Jack whispers, pushing their foreheads together. Ralph murmurs an affirmative, and their lips are pressed together suddenly. The kiss is desperate and quick, Jack's hands sliding up his shirt to cup his armpits, hands warm against his chilled skin. Ralph tangles his fingers in those curls, and presses a thigh between his legs. Jack is the one who breaks the kiss, breathing heavily. Ralph is sure he looks no better, but Jack still smiles, cupping his cheek and rubbing his thumb over his cheekbone. 'You're so pretty.' He whispers, and kisses him again, too quick for Ralph to kiss back. Ralph hums, hands dropping from his hair to his shoulders, pulling him down over him.  
Immediately, Jack lowers onto him, the hand that's not on his face pushing under him to wrap around his middle.  
  


They lie like that, tangled together, doing nothing but kissing occasionally, until the sun is well over the horizon, and someone knocks at their door. Jack rolls off of him just as Simon opens the door, already dressed.

'Ready to go?'

 


	13. XI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lmao another request
> 
> the prompt was control/loss of control so my mind went to ralph topping for once lmao  
> (also slight bondage and other things that are fun)

'Have you ever been fucked?' Jack blinks in the dark, looking down in the direction that Ralph's voice comes from, and smiles.

'No.' Ralph shifts, and his cheek is pressing to his chest, fingers sliding over his stomach.

'You wanna?'

'What?'

'Get fucked.' Jack laughs, and slings his arm across Ralph's shoulder.

'Not particularly, no.'

'How come? It's nice.'

'When you're used to it. Besides, you know how I am about control and all that shit.' Ralph hums, climbing on top of him.

'You let me handcuff you.'

'That was different.' Ralph whines and noses along his cheek to find his jaw in the dark, pressing kisses along his jawline.

'Please? I'm always the one getting fucked. Just once? For me?' Jack sighs, wraps his arms around his middle, nuzzling his cheek against the blond's shoulder.

'Fine. We'll try.' Ralph all but squeals, kissing Jack.

'Thank you, baby,' He whispers, and Jack hums in reply, 'Right now?'

'Eh, sure. Why not.' Ralph flicks on the light, and smiles, blinking in the sudden blare. Jack pushes his hand up his cheek, sliding his fingers through his hair. 'So pretty.' He murmurs, and Ralph snorts, leaning away to help him out of his pyjamas, then pushing his own bottoms down.

'Do you wanna be on your stomach? Or like this?' Jack hesitates, and glances down between them. Although he is still hesitant, his body is certainly responding to the promise of sex.

'I wanna see your face.' He says finally, and Ralph smiles wider, kissing him again.

'I love you so much,' Ralph reaches into the drawer for the lube, looking down quickly, 'I guess we can start with my fingers? Go from there?' Jack nods, spreading his legs and angling his hips up for Ralph. The blond moves down to sit at his ankles, spreading some lube over his entrance.

'Shit, that's cold.'

'You've had this on your dick. It isn't any different.'

'Still.' Ralph snorts and pours more lube on his fingers, just to be sure. He shifts closer and, with a nod from Jack, eases a finger into him. Jack gasps, and Ralph stills.

'You good? I can stop.'

'No. Keep going.' Ralph flexes his finger a few times, then eases out, notching his index and middle finger against him, easing in, slower than before. Jack groans, gripping his forehead.

'Fuck - does it always hurt?' Ralph immediately pulls away, looking up at him in concern.

'You sure you're alright?'

'I can handle a little pain, baby. C'mon.' Ralph bites his lip, and eases the two fingers back in, working them in and out of him gently. He whispers praise and kisses the inside of his knees, and Jack moans.

'One more.' He urges, hips rolling against his hand. Ralph works the three fingers past the ring of muscle, leaning up and kissing Jack as he crooks and flexes his fingers.

When Jack has loosened enough from his fingers and words, Ralph pulls away, and looks down at him.

'So? What do you say?' Jack nods, chest already heaving.

'Yes. It's good, baby, you're so good.'

'Before anything though. Your control comment got me thinking...' He bends over and reaches under the bed for their small collection of toys, and procures the handcuffs, 'Maybe you could give up all of your control?'

'Ralph...'

'We have that colours thing. If you don't like anything, or you're even a little bit uncomfortable, they come off.'

'You expect me to let you cuff me? Look at you. With you doing what you'll be doing... Looking like this. Not being able to touch you will be torture.' Ralph hums, setting them on his chest.

'There's an idea.' He says in a teasing tone, and Jack manages a laugh, tugging him down to kiss him.

'If I let you have your way, what will you give me?'

'The fuck of your life?' Jack hums, nosing along his jaw, 'Okay. If you haven't come by the time that I have, I'll suck you off. Deal?' Jack flushes when his cock twitches.

'Deal.' He hums, and Ralph pushes him back gently, planting a hand on his chest. He talks quietly as he shackles Jack to the headboard.

'I would be cruel, and get my old sleep mask too. But that would probably be too much for one day, yes?' Jack nods, meeting Ralph's eyes and testing the reach by tugging at his restraints. Ralph straddles him, sliding his hands down his chest lazily and presses his wrists down to the pillow over his head. 'Don't break the bed. You'll pay for it, and no sex for a week if you do.' Ralph pushes his fingers up his ribs, then runs his short nails back down, making Jack shiver.

'I thought you were gonna fuck me?' Jack urges, and Ralph sighs, kissing his Adam's apple.

'Patience.' He hums, but moves off of him anyways, grabbing the lube again. He spreads more over his length and bends down to kiss his stomach. Jack hums, arching up into his lips. Ralph sits back, and presses into him slowly. Jack gasps, gripping the headboard. Ralph leans up and kisses his cheek, pressing in all the way. He stays still, allowing Jack to get used to it.

'Tell me when you went me to move.' He whispers, and Jack nods, moving his head to kiss his neck.

'You can go.' He murmurs, and Ralph slowly starts rolling his hips, sliding in and out of him slowly. Jack hums, pressing his hips up into Ralph. He tugs at the cuffs, and Ralph pushes his nose into his hair, breath picking up.

'How fast?' He breathes, grasping his thighs.

'If you're going too fast I'll let you know.' Ralph nods quickly, and picks up the pace slowly, pulling out that pushing back into him. Jack groans quietly, and Ralph wraps his arms around him gripping tightly. Jack bends up into him and presses his cheek to his temple.

'This good for you?' Ralph whispers, voice breathless, and Jack nods, straining against his restraints.

'I wanna hold you.'

'Do you want them to come off?'

'No. Leave them on. Just... Come closer?' Ralph presses closer and pushes further into him, making Jack moan and rest his forehead on his shoulder. He curses, and Ralph smiles against his hair, shifting to kiss his temple. He moves quicker, trying to keep at a pace that the taller boy could handle. Jack groans, hips rolling down against his, and Ralph lets himself get lost in the feeling.

'Colour?' He chokes out.

'Green. Green, fuck, so green baby.' Ralph nods, and closes his eyes, moaning into Jack's hair, reaching up to thread his fingers through Jack's. Jack kisses his shoulder and pushes down, using his legs to tug Ralph's hips down with him. 'You close baby? Gonna come in me?' Ralph whimpers and nods. Jack nudges his jaw with his nose, then pulls back. 'Let go, baby. Use me.' Ralph sits back and grips at his hips, angling them up. He thrusts into him sharply, erratically, moaning. The sound is long and low and peters out into a whimper as he spills into Jack, falling against his chest. Jack murmurs praise and watches him, straining down to press kisses to his head and face.

'Did you come?' Ralph murmurs, chest heaving as he pulls out and climbs off him.

'Nah. I'm close, though.' Ralph raises a brow.

'You don't seem it. You're barely sweating.' Jack motions to his throbbing erection, then motions to Ralph.

'And you said that you'd suck me off.' Ralph laughs, and moves between his legs.

'Is that why you haven't come?' Jack smiles, and Ralph bends down, kissing his stomach. Jack tugs at his restraints, and clears his throat.

'Uh? Aren't you going to take these off first?'

'When did I say I would take them off?'

'You said that after you were done.'

'Nah. I think I'll get you to come first. Don't move your hips, or I won't be doing anything of the sort.' He warns, then kisses the tip. Jack sighs and shifts up the bed as far as he can go to give Ralph more space. Ralph takes his length into his mouth with one movement, not even blinking, and Jack groans.

'God, that's so fuckin' hot.' Ralph grins as best he can, then starts to move his head, bobbing his head as he holds Jack's gaze. Jack moans loudly and pushes his face against his arm. Ralph hums around him, knowing how it'll drive him crazy, then hollows his cheeks around him. Jack gasps brokenly and lurches forward as far as he could go, twisted into a position that looked especially uncomfortably, arms stretched behind him. Ralph pushes him back down, pulling away to lick his lips.

'Don't strain yourself, baby. I don't want you to pull something or some shit.' Jack whines as Ralph suckles at the tip of his cock, waiting for him to relax. As soon as he's settled, Ralph does the same thing as he had earlier, coughing slightly when Jack bucks up into him unexpectedly. He pulls back to recover, then bobs his head slowly, dragging his lips over his length.

'God - fuck, Ralph, I'm so fuckin' close. So close.' Ralph bobs his head faster, and Jack groans, bending forward again as he spills into Ralph's mouth. Ralph sits back and strokes him down until his cock has softened in his hand, then swallows his mouthful, sitting between Jack's legs to look over him for a moment. After Jack has caught his breath, he moves to straddle him, unlocking one part. Almost immediately, Jack sits up and takes his face in his hands, kissing him several times. Ralph smiles into the quick kisses, then pulls back.

'How'd you like it?' He murmurs, kissing the bruise that's formed around his wrist. Jack smiles, pulling him close.

'Never again. I'd definitely go mad from it.'


	14. XII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another request (theres a trend here) from an anonymous on my tumblr.
> 
> -"We’re hiding from the authorities and it’s very close quarters in here, I can feel your body against mine."

Jack sprints down the street, Roger right behind him. There are shouts behind them, and Jack thanks any higher power out there that it was dark out, and that he had the sense to wear dark clothes that evening. Roger isn't so lucky - he had been wearing a stark white shirt when the cops had busted in. He had quickly shucked it, and stuffed it into Jack's bag before tossing it out the window to hop out of the window. But at least he wasn't ghostly pale like Jack was - he would have a little more ease blending in with their surroundings.

Jack glances over his shoulder - the cops had dropped back a little ways away, so he grabs Roger's arm and turns down the nearest alleyway, almost hitting a Dumpster. He ducks behind it, pulling Roger down in his lap, pressing into the corner of the Dumpster and the brick wall behind them. It takes a few minutes, but the two men chasing them run right past it, and Jack has to bite the heel of his hand to keep from bursting to laughter. Roger quivers against him, obviously in the same position, and Jack grips his upper arm to keep him tight against his front until the footsteps fade. He chuckles quietly, and Roger doubles over, laughter bouncing off the walls. After a few moments, Jack shushes him, and pulls him back up.

'They might come back.' He whispers, and Roger hums.

'Will they see us?' He jokes, stretching up to look into the alley. Jack grins, and takes off his bag so he can press further into the corner.

'We chucked the cans - even if they find us, they can't pin anything on us. They'll get tired of looking and go home. Can I put my shirt back on? It's cold out.' Jack looks around, but shakes his head.

'Like I said -'

'Shit, Merridew, alright.' Roger slumps back against him, pressing his back to his warm front. Jack hesitates, then wraps his arms around his friend. Roger freezes, but doesn't say anything. He slowly relaxes in his hold and sighs. Jack bites his lip and looks around, anywhere but the shorter boy's face.

'This good?' He asks quietly, after a long, awkward silence.

'Yeah.' Roger mutters, just as quietly. He shifts against him. Jack's eyes go to his throat, watching his Adam's apple bob. 'Why are you so fuckin' hot?' Jack splutters for a second, and Roger blinks, then coughs. 'Fuck - I meant warm. Not hot like - you know, but like, you know?'

'Oh. Yeah.' Silence settles again, and Roger shifts in his arms multiple times, gnawing on his lip.

'Do you think they're coming back?' Roger asks quietly, and Jack swallows, uneasily looking into his eyes.

'Ugh. I dunno.'

'Wanna... Get up? Something?' Jack nods and releases him awkwardly, letting Roger stand. He grabs his shirt from the bag and pulls it over his head. Just as Jack stands, footsteps echo back down the alleyway, along with the sounds of a walkie-talkie. They look at each other, wide-eyed, then Roger pulls off Jack's cap and presses himself up against the wall.

'Kiss me.' He whispers, and Jack splutters. Without hesitating, Roger pulls him down and wraps his arms around his neck, pushing his tongue into his mouth. Belatedly, Jack realizes his intention, and kisses back, grabbing his face. Just as he does this, a harsh flashlight beam shines in their faces, and Jack pulls away, blinking in the sudden light. The man blinks, then lifts the walkie-talkie to his mouth.

'Yeah. It's just a couple of kids.' He lowers the flashlight and clips the walkie-talkie to his belt. 'Don't you boys have school tomorrow.' Jack pulls back as best he can with Roger's arms still around his neck.

'Uh. Yes, sir.' The man grunts, and walks away. Jack looks back to Roger, laughs in relief. 'Fuck. You're a genius.' He murmurs, looking to Roger's lips. Roger grins, seeming to know what was on his mind.

'You don't need a cop breathing down our necks to kiss me, y'know that, right?' Jack laughs nervously, and leans in, kissing him quickly, shyly. Roger leans up into it, fingers sliding into his hair. The kiss grows in need, intensity, and Jack grasps at the shorter boy's rear as he bites at his bottom lip. Roger lifts himself off the ground, wrapping his legs around his waist. Jack pulls back, glances down between them, and smiles mischievously.

'Is that boner for me?'

'Nah. I get off on getting chased by cops,' Roger leans up and bites at Jack's ear, 'I love a man in uniform, y'know?' Jack laughs and  shifts his hands to his waist.

'Nevertheless, I could help you out with that. If you wanted.' Roger looks up at him suddenly.

'The cop could come back, y'know.'

'So I'll be fast.' Roger stands again, and slides his hand between them, cupping the crotch of his jeans.

'Seems like you have something that needs to be taken care of, too.' Jack hums and pushes in his palm. Roger pulls away and turns around, pushing his rear against his crotch. Jack groans and grabs at his hips. 'Better go quick.' He hums, and Jack clumsily pushes his jeans and briefs down, then tugs Roger's down. He spits on his hand, then pushes two fingers into him. Roger moans against the rough brick, reaching back to spread himself for him. Jack pulls back and pushes into him, quickly. He pulls Roger back so his rear pushes out, then presses his hands to the wall, leaning over him and biting his shoulder through his tee, thrusting into him sharply. He grips at his hips with one hand, reaching around with the other to pump him quickly.

'Let's see who comes first, yes?'

'It's gonna be you, obviously.' Jack hums and pushes into him so suddenly that he lurches into the wall, grasping his cock more firmly. Roger gasps and moans.

'You sure about that?' He murmurs, and Roger laughs breathlessly. Jack bites at his shoulder and pulls out. Just as Roger moves to complain, Jack pushes in again, making him gasp. He stops, shifts their stances, then grips his hips with both hands. 'You think you could wank yourself off for a bit?' Roger nods and strokes himself quickly as Jack thrusts into him quicker, getting deeper with the new leverage.

 

It doesn't take long for their climaxes to mount, and they both dangle dangerously close to the edge. Jack smacks away Roger's hand and pumps him with his hand, biting at his shoulder as he dangles just on the edge. Roger moans, gripping his wrist. His knees buckle as he spills onto the wall and pavement, the taller boy's name coming out in a broken cry. Jack groans and hurriedly pushes Roger's shirt up under his armpits, pulling out and spilling onto his back. Roger glances back, and curses.

'Dude, what the fuck? How am I gonna clean that up?' Jack curses quietly, stumbling slightly as he bends for his bag. He finds his cap instead, and uses it to wipe the come from his friend's skin. He tosses it into the Dumpster then, and Roger fixes his clothes, moving away from where they stood to lean on the wall, catching his breath. Jack walks over and kisses him, gripping his jaw.

'This a one time thing?' He asks, and Roger laughs.

'Sure hope not. That was pretty fuckin' good. I'd like to see what it'd be like when we aren't rushing.' Jack grins and hoists his bag over his shoulder. He walks to the mouth of the alley, glancing both ways, then strolls out casually. Roger waits a few moments, then does the same.

Jack is waiting for him, and they walk home, shoulder to shoulder, just like it was any other night.


	15. XIII.i

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you are anyway uncomfortable with drug use/abuse, destructive tendencies, and a VERY dependent jack, this is not the fic for you!!! pls click away i don't wanna upset anyone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have requests to do but i dont wanna do any of them rn  
> also this wouldnt leave me alone nd i had it scheduled for 23 but i didnt wanna lose any ideas for it  
> so  
> amazing  
> there's no like IN DETAIL smut but it's there  
> its in two parts bc it was getting long.

The first time Jack sees him, he is sitting on a park bench, next to Roger. A half-spent cigarette dangles from his thin lips as he scans the grass lazily. He was still buzzed from the night before. He hadn't exactly slept it off. He just slapped a Band-Aid over the inside of his elbow, and went on with the rest of his self destruction, as per usual.

'There.' He mumbles around the cigarette, pointing across the grass at a group of three boys that lounge in the sun a few feet away. Roger squints as Jack pulls the water bottle from his hand, taking a swig. He tries not to wince as the vodka burns all the way down to the pit of his stomach.

'Which one? The fat one?'

'No. The blond.'

'What about him?' Roger pulls the water bottle away, and Jack takes a final drag of his cigarette before stubbing it on the park bench.

'I dunno. All I know is that,' He pauses to pull Roger's pack from the darker boy's front pocket, flipping it open to pull another smoke out, twirling it between his long fingers, 'I wanna ruin him. If only jus' a little bit.'

 

He all but forgets about the blond boy, until he somehow winds up on that same park bench, a week later, alone this time. Roger was back at their flat, sleeping off the cocktail of drugs and alcohol they had taken the night before. Jack just sits there, watching children run around, wondering what it felt like to actually _feel_ something, not just the overly saturated trips that the heroin gave him.

'Is this seat taken?' A soft voice rips him from his train of thoughts, and he turns to find that blond that he had pointed out to Roger that last weekend. He doesn't have that tanned boy or the fat one trailing after him, but a sizable dog sits at his heel. Jack swallows and shifts down.

'Uh. No. Go ahead.' The dog sniffs at his leg, and it takes all of Jack's willpower not to shove it away from him. The blond gives a tug on the leash, murmuring what must be the thing's name. _Who the hell names a dog Pig?_

'Is he yours?' Jack finally asks, and the blond shakes his head.

'I wish. I'm just looking after him for the week.' The dog sits between the blond's feet, panting in the late spring heat. The blond smooths his hand through his fur soothingly, and Jack can't help but stare. _Would those hands help him feel?_ He finds his thoughts verging into the territory of Scary and Not Thoughts He Wanted To Think, and he swallows thickly, looking away. 'What's your name?' The blond asks, and Jack nearly jumps, rubbing the inside of his elbow. He wears long sleeves, and the cotton catches on the Band-Aids he has scattered over the spots. When his mind was clearer than usual, he hated the way they looked, but he knew that looking like this was the only way that he could keep from put-

'Jack.' He says to push away the Not Thoughts He Wanted To Think thoughts, and the blond's smile is so pretty that he can't breathe properly, can barely hear him repeat him name, then introduce himself.

'I'm Ralph.' He nudges his upper arm with his elbow, effectively bringing Jack back down to Earth - God, he didn't even shoot up the night before. Why did he feel like he was still buzzed? 'Rough night or something? No offense, but you look horrible.' Jack always looked horrible. He laughs.

'You could say that.'

 

Somehow, someway, he gets Ralph's number. The shorter boy stands when the dog gets impatient, and pulls a pen from his pocket. He grabs Jack's wrist and pulls his hand close, writing down his number. Then, his lips are pressing to Jack's cheek, and he's walking down the pathway. Jack can't think straight, but he thinks that Ralph had said something before he went.

Something along the lines of 'Be safe.'

 

He calls him that night instead of getting high with Roger and some other friends of theirs, shutting his bedroom door tight and lying on the mattress that's been shoved into the corner of the room. There's three rings, then that soft voice is on the other end.

'Hello?' Jack almost hangs up then and there, the shaking in his hands reminding him of the time he had tried to get clean, for his mother. He had lain on this mattress, naked and shivering, until he crumbled and took five hits that same night.

'Um. Hi?' The first hi doesn't come out right, so he tries again. 'Hey. Is this Ralph?'

'Speaking.' Ralph sounds calm and Jack wants to do nothing but find where he is and curl against him. Ruining be damned - he felt as if this boy might be able to save him. Even for a short time. Even if he wasn't interested in baggage so heavy as what Jack brought with him at all times.

'It's Jack. Fr-'

'From the park! I was hoping you would call.' It feels like Jack is chewing on cotton. He swallows thickly, then manages to reply.

'Y-you... You were?'

'Yeah. It isn't every day that I sit with a cute boy in the park _and_ give him my number.' Jack manages something that sounds sort of like a laugh.

'I'm not cute.'

'Yes, you are. Under those baggy clothes and those ridiculous bags under your eyes. There's something about you that I wanna bring out,' There's a pause, and it sounds like Ralph is taking a drink, 'Am I being too forward? Lemme start again. Okay. Yes. I like you. You obviously like me - a dead fish could see that. What do you wanna do about this?' Jack thinks it over carefully, biting his thumbnail. Then, he swallows, and speaks in a voice that is surprisingly confident.

'What's your address?'

 

Twenty minutes and a bus ride later, Jack is wondering what he's doing here, hands shoved deep into his pockets. He then pushes his hoodie off his head, smoothing his hair anxiously, then knocks. Ralph opens the door, smiling. It had been a long time since he had seen someone do that without hesitation, without peeking around the barely opened crack of it.

'Hey.' He says, opening the door further. Jack expects the clatter of chains being pulled from the door, but he suspects that Ralph only had the customary single lock on his door.

'Hi.' Despite the practical invite into his home, Jack stays glued in place on the stoop, shifting his slight weight from foot to foot. _Shit Merridew, are you a vampire or something?_  Ralph hasn't stopped smiling, not even faltering when he reaches across the doorway, tugging him into the house, shutting the door behind him, not even locking the door. Jack stops in the short hallway, wondering if it would be okay if he did it for him.

'You want something to drink?' Jack thinks that Ralph maybe said it more than once, because he's starting to look confused. Jack rips his gaze from the door and wets his lips.

'Uh. No, I'm good.' Ralph's smile returns, and he gently pushes the dog away as he leads Jack into the main room. He sits on the sofa, folding his legs under him, and Jack awkwardly sits down beside him. Ralph turns so his back is pressed to the arm of the sofa. He leans forward, elbows on his knees, resting his chin in his hands, and _that face_. Jack could look at this boy forever, if he let him.

'So, Jack, what do you like to do?' Ralph murmurs, and Jack coughs. He figured that _drugs_ wasn't an appropriate thing to say to someone he didn't even know.

'Uh. I dunno. I'm pretty boring, actually.' Ralph laughs, and Jack can't breathe. When was the last time he heard someone laugh?

'I feel that.' He says, and Jack wants to move closer, tell him how he was probably the most interesting person to him. Instead, he looks away, and picks at the ripped knee in his jeans.

'Um. Do you do stuff? That you like to? Do?' Jack winces, but Ralph just bites his thumbnail to suppress another laugh.

'Some things,' He moves closer, and reaches out to pluck something off the sleeve of Jack's hoodie,  'But I know that I really want to do something that I haven't. Yet.' Jack doesn't quite hear that last bit, because, in someway, that brief brush of his fingers seemed much more intimate than the kiss on his cheek that morning. His mouth is dry, and he wishes that he took Ralph up on that offer of a drink. Something strong, preferably.

'Oh yeah?' He manages, and Ralph nods, biting his lip, 'What's that?'

'Well, it isn't so much something as some _one_.' Ralph moves closer still, and Jack is beyond thankful that he hadn't taken anything before coming over. No way would he let anything alter this memory, no matter the outcome.

'Really?' Ralph hums, resting his hand on Jack's. Jack was buzzing, feeling higher than he ever had on any trip, and swallows, finally looking Ralph in the eye. Ralph's top half edges closer, then sits back, and Jack can't breathe when he realizes that he might've been going in to kiss him. And he had a feeling that he wasn't going to kiss him on the cheek this time. Instead, he rubs his thumb over the curve between his thumb and forefinger, voice softer than usual when he speaks.

'Do you have anyone?'

'Like, am I single? Yeah.'

'No. I hadn't even thought about that.' He laughs nervously, 'But like, anyone you'd want to...?'

'You could say that.' He hadn't noticed that he's moved forward until their foreheads are pushed together. He grips Ralph's hand, probably too tight, and takes a shaky breath. Ralph tries to move closer, their knees already pressed together. His other hand comes up to Jack's chest, and he expects to be pushed away. Instead, the blond grips his hoodie and holds him close.

'Can I... I wanna kiss you. Is it okay if I kiss you?'

'Yes,' Jack breathes, and Ralph pushes up onto his knees to hover above Jack. He takes his face in one hand, thumb pressed under his jaw gently and fingers splayed over his ear. He tilts his face back, and leans down to press his lips to Jack. Jack actually whimpers, immediately melting into the kiss. He feels Ralph smile into the kiss, then the blond is climbing in his lap, pulling his hand from his to hold his face in both hands, lifting onto his knees once again, leaning down. Jack can barely stand the extensive contact, and it felt like his whole body was on fire. Ralph pulls away from the kiss, chest heaving and lips swollen, and smiles down at him, brushing his hair from his face in an action like he's seen mothers do to their sons in movies. Jack bites his lip and pushes thoughts about his mother from his mind, focusing on the blond above him.  
Ralph meets his eyes and smiles, kissing him again, then sits back in his lap, hands going to his neck. Jack steadies him by gripping his waist, and Ralph hums, wrapping his arms around his neck and leaning his forehead on his arm, near Jack's neck.

'What now?' He murmurs, and Jack shrugs, pressing a hand against Ralph's back. Ralph seems to get what he's trying to do, sliding forward and shifting to press his cheek to his shoulder. Ralph speaks again, voice muffled by Jack's hoodie. 'We could go upstairs. To my room.'

 

* * *

 

It's been a long time since Jack has been truly sober. It's been longer still since he's had sex sober. He certainly doesn't mind it now, with Ralph on top of him, cheeks and chest tinged pink with want. He had let Ralph take off the hoodie, but not the shirt he wore beneath that. He didn't want to explain the Band-Aids. Ralph hadn't fought him on it. He just smiled and kissed his shoulder through his shirt. Jack wondered if his cheeks hurt from all this smiling.

Now, he sits under him in only that long sleeved shirt and his briefs, while Ralph is naked above him, looking completely comfortable in his own skin. Why shouldn't he? He's the prettiest thing Jack has ever seen. Then again, he didn't have much to compare to. Ralph grinds down into him then touches the briefs.

'Will you take these off?' He whispers, and Jack nods, and Ralph climbs off him, kissing him quickly and tugging them down. He bites his lip and passes his hand over his length a few times.

'You're already hard, baby.' He murmurs.

'Yeah. That happens when you get grinded on by a naked boy with a nice ass. ' Ralph grins and reaches over him for the bottle of lube he had produced when they came up. He spreads some over his length, then climbs into his lap again, wrapping his arms around his neck.

'You think my ass is nice?' Ralph holds his length steady, holding himself just above it, rear brushing against the head when he moved.

'I think that everything about you is nice.' Jack whispers, and Ralph hums, sinking onto him slowly. He's just worked past the -wonderfully tight - ring of muscle when Ralph stops again.

'Is that so?' He replies in an equally quiet voice, hips moving in little circles, just to drive him mad.

'Uh huh.' He says lamely, and Ralph smiles.

'Tell me more.'

'More what?'

'More compliments. It's sweet.' Ralph hums, and Jack bites his lip.

'Uh. You're pretty?'

'How pretty?' Ralph whispers, moving down more. Jack's breath hitches.

'So pretty. So fuckin' pretty,' Ralph makes a small sound and sinks down further, nails digging into his chest.

'What else?'

'Your laugh. It's - _fuck_ \- the nicest sound I've ever heard.' Jack is moments from just babbling, telling Ralph everything he ever thought about him, how he craves for something as good as him in his life, how he always wants to fall apart and maybe, just maybe, he could be something that could make him a little closer to what whole seemed like.

But, thankfully, Ralph seems to have enough of the teasing, sinking down the rest of the way. The sound he makes is the nicest yet, and Jack grips at his hips tightly, groaning quietly.

 

Jack is so glad he wasn't drunk, or high, or otherwise out of commission. He would give up every stimulant out there just to have this again. Just to have Ralph, making these noises, looking like this, feeling like this, because of him.

And Jack doesn't know a lot about love, but fuck, if this wasn't it.

He can't look away from Ralph's face, especially when the blond gets lost in it all, eyes shut and mouth open. And goddamn, when he climaxes, Jack can't get enough of the way he says his name.

 

When Ralph turns off the lamp by his bed, Jack takes off his shirt and settles beside Ralph. He hadn't intended to stay long, just until Ralph was asleep. He would get sharp and impatient and jittery if he was sober too long. But Ralph rolls over and presses his face to his chest, humming happily, and Jack knows he won't have the heart to pull away from that. He sighs, and pushes his nose into Ralph's hair, closing his eyes.

 

It's the best night's sleep he's had  in a long time. Maybe its the mattress, soft and not at all lumpy. Or maybe the fact that there's more than one pillow and blanket.

More than anything, it was probably the boy burrowed into him.

 

Jack didn't mean to stay all night. But it's late morning when Ralph is kissing him awake, already dressed and up.

'Mornin'.' He hums, and Ralph smiles, sitting on the edge of the bed, sliding his fingers over his chest.

'Morning. You want something to eat?'

'I'm good. Come back to bed?' Jack sounds like a small child when he says it, but Ralph doesn't comment on the tone of voice. Instead, his eyes go to the insides of his arms, and Jack feels bile rise in his throat.

'Alright. You want some new Band-Aids? Some of those look pretty old.' Jack glances down at them. He hadn't thought about that, but he finds that it was true - some of them were grey and curling up at the edges, losing their adhesive. He swallows, and nods. Ralph stands again and disappears into the hall, and Jack sits up, resisting the urge to get dressed and leave.

Ralph comes back in with a box, sitting by Jack. He holds his hand out, and Jack isn't sure if he wants to vomit or just leave as he places one of his arms into his hand. Ralph carefully peels each Band-Aid up, not saying anything. He smooths his thumb over each scar, then kisses them gently. He covers them with a new one, then continues with this.

'How long did you use?' Ralph asks when he's almost finished. Jack swallows, refusing to look at him. 'My friend's boyfriend used to use. I dunno what happened to him when they broke up.'

'Still using.' He mumbles, and Ralph makes a small noise, hurt and sad. He kisses the curve of his wrist, and Jack can't look at him. He doesn't want to see the sadness or pity that was surely there. 'I get it if you don't want... Baggage. It's all good, I can-'

'No. No, I... I really like you. I can deal with baggage. I can get someone to help you.' Ralph leans up and pushes his forehead to Jack's. 'I can help you.' Jack doesn't know what to do, so he bites his lip, staring down at his lap. Ralph's hands cup his elbows, moving closer. 'So? What do you say?'

 

* * *

 

Jack's been seeing Ralph for a good month now, and life was as close as _good_ as it ever had been. When he spent time with him, they usually went to the park, or Ralph's flat, or some little place for lunch.

Today, they sit on the grass by a fountain in the park, sharing a sandwich. Jack has never had much appetite, so he gives most of his portion to Ralph, who frowns but takes it anyways, packing it away.

'Can I ask you a question?' Ralph says, laying his hand on Jack's. Jack hesitates, but Ralph asks anyways. 'How come we never go over to your place? Do you even, y'know... Have one?'

'Of course I have one.' Jack mumbles.

'Can I see it?'

 

Jack really doesn't want to show Ralph where he spent most of his time when they weren't together. Not the living room with the ratty sofa and the upturned crate that acted like a table, covered in used needles and half-emptied bags of various drugs. Especially not his room, with the lumpy mattress pushed into the corner and the laundry basket half filled with the only clothes he had.

But here they stand, in front of the door. Roger's father paid for everything, under the impression that Roger was working on some film or something. Which gave Roger the opportunity to further fuel their drug habits, and get high every other night. Ralph kisses Jack's cheek and laces their fingers together, squeezing his hand. Jack sighs, and opens the door. He gets one look at someone he doesn't know, passed out on the old sofa, and turns Ralph down the hall, and into his room. Ralph stops in the doorway, looking at the nonexistent furniture, then to him.

'Jack...'

'You're the one who wanted to see it.' Jack stops at the mattress, and he doesn't want Ralph anywhere near it. But the blond is behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist, pressing against his back.

'I'm glad you showed me.' He whispers, 'You should've told me.'

'Eh. It isn't much. But it's... It's home.' Ralph is silent for a long time, and Jack's hand rests over his. Ralph looks over to the laundry basket in the corner. He finally speaks, voice soft.

'It doesn't have to be.'

 

* * *

 

Jack agrees to move in with Ralph, and decides to get clean.   
They're in bed when he tells Ralph, and the blond smiles at him, overjoyed and so wide that it must hurt, and climbs into his lap, kissing him.

'Really?' Jack nods, and Ralph all but squeals, 'Where?' 

'Uh. Here?' Ralph blinks, shoulders lowering slightly.

'But... Shouldn't you... Go to a rehab center?'

'Why? That's where people go when they're addicted to things.'

'Yes. And you're addicted to heroin.' Ralph sits back in his lap, looking confused.

'I'm not addicted. It's a habit. A bad habit, a habit I'm gonna break. But not an addiction. There's a difference.' Ralph frowns.

'I wouldn't know how to... Look after you. When it gets bad.'

'Do you want me to go to rehab?'

'Kind of, yeah. There'll be professionals with drugs-'

'I don't want drugs, I want to be sober.'

'I know, but it's dangerous to quit all at once, Jack.' Jack sits up, blinking rapidly.

'I've just moved in, and now you want me to go off somewhere? Do you even want me here?'

'Of course I want you here! But I want you to be safe, too! I want you to be healthy, and it's healthiest when there are people who'll know what to do when you get desperate.' Ralph has climbed off his lap, taking his face in his hands. 'Please, Jack. Think about it? For me?' _For me_. Couldn't Ralph see that it was for him? Jack meets his eyes and swallows thickly, then nods, smiling weakly.

'Okay. For you.'

 

The following week, Ralph's father drives them out to a squat building in the middle of nowhere. Ralph moves to get out, but Jack leans forward.

'I'm fine on my own.' He whispers, and Ralph freezes, looking up a bit too sharply.

'Are you sure?' Jack nods, and picks up his bag. Ralph gets out anyway, stopping him before he walks in, planting his hands on his shoulders.

'Will you, like, hate me or something because of this?'

'Of course not.'

'Then why didn't you want me going in?' Ralph is twisting his fingers together, chewing his lips.

'Because I don't want you to see the kind of people in there.'

'What do you mean?'

'I tried going, once. After my mom OD'd. But... The people that're around there. I couldn't do it. So I tried a home detox. That obviously didn't work.' Jack laughs bitterly, and Ralph takes his face in his hands, pulls him down to push their foreheads together.

'It's only 30 days, Jack. You won't become... I don't know, a ghost or whatever you think will happen. You'll get through this. We'll get through this.' Jack nods, and straightens up.

'I'll see you in 30 days.' He murmurs, and kisses his forehead quickly before walking to the entrance briskly. Ralph calls his name, and he stops, turns around despite every instinct telling him not to.

'I love you.' Ralph calls, smiling at him hopefully. Jack smiles back, the smile not quite reaching his eyes.

'Thirty days.' He calls back, but he can't figure out why he didn't say it back when he knows that he feels the same. Ralph's smile falters, but he turns around before he can see it fall, and pushes into the clinic.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK OK so my promise to myself was that id post the first 'act' of my heathers au, do this until ch. 15, then go back and finish the heathers au.  
> and.  
> yeah.  
> so, i should have the next part for this au up in about a week, give or take a few days. who knows tho.


	16. XIII.ii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you are anyway uncomfortable with drug use/abuse, destructive tendencies, and a VERY dependent jack, this is not the fic for you!!! pls click away i don't wanna upset anyone
> 
> there's also explicit drug use in this part, just a warning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i skipped jack's stint in rehab bc nothing happens lmao

When Jack gets out of rehab, Ralph is there.  
The elevator dings, doors sliding open. Jack only takes two steps, barely lifting the bag he took when Ralph's flying into his arms, laughing. Jack barely catches him, arms tight around him.

'Fuck, Ralph.' He chokes out, and Ralph presses quick kisses to his face.

'Missed you.' He murmurs against his cheek, and Jack hums, moving awkwardly from the elevator, and he kisses him.

'Figured that out.' When Ralph laughs, it's almost a giggle as he pulls away, gripping his hands.

'C'mon. Let's go home,' He leans up, kisses his cheek. Ralph meets his eyes, raises his brows, and tucks his tongue into his cheek. Jack laughs, and drapes his arm over his shoulders.

 

The noises Ralph made were more addictive than any drug, and the best bit was that Jack didn't have to spend thirty days away from Ralph because he couldn't control an urge.

Jack kisses Ralph when he moves in him, and Ralph's legs are locked tight around his waist, fingers tangled in his hair. He moans his name over and over, scrambles at his back. Jack laughs, the sound strangled.

'I love you.' Ralph whispers, and Jack hums, kissing his temple. Ralph whispers it again, arching into him as his pleasure mounts. Jack pushes into him one last time and they both climax at the same time.  
Jack pulls out, curses quietly, and kisses him gently before rolling over. Ralph's chest is heaving, and he glances over to him.

'Hey, baby?'

'Mhm?'

'Can I ask you something?' Jack rolls onto his side and pulls him to his side.

'You just did,' Ralph glances up, chews at his lip, 'Shoot.' Ralph looks back down.

'Why didn't you say it back?' Jack's heart drops, and he squeezes his arm. 'I mean, if you don't feel the same, it's whatever.' Jack kisses his forehead.

'I do. I feel the same. I'm just... Not ready to say it, okay? But I do.' Ralph nods, looks down at his hands.

'Okay,' He says quietly, and Jack pulls him closer.

 

* * *

  

Another month goes by, and Jack can _feel_ them settling down. Although the way Ralph looks at him never changes, he doesn't smile at him as widely. And the thought of settling terrified Jack. Settling meant responsibilities, which meant stress. And the only way that Jack knew how to deal with stress was drugs.

He starts picking fights about little things that shouldn't have mattered. Didn't matter, really. But the aftermath of the fights was always whispered apologies in the middle of kisses and wandering hands, and the feelings in those moments reminded him most of the times before Ralph started getting comfortable around him, and Jack didn't feel so ashamed about the marks on his arms.

But those moments never lasted, and then they were either fighting again, or talking about the things that married people talked about - getting a dog of their own, maybe.

'It'd help you with your attacks.' Ralph murmurs one night as they scroll through the website of a local animal shelter.

'What about Pig?'

'He isn't _ours._ Don't you want something that belongs to us? It doesn't even have to be a dog.' Jack rubs his thumb over his shoulder.

'Can we talk about this in the morning? I have a headache.' Ralph looks up, furrows his brow.

'You've been having those a lot. Do you want to get it checked out?'

'It's just stress, Ralph. I'm fine.' Ralph sighs, and closes the laptop.

'Fine. I'm gonna go shower,' He says coolly, and pulls from his hold, 'Have a nap or something.' Jack _tsks_ , but doesn't bother going after him, flopping back onto the pillows.

 

The next morning, Ralph is already out of bed and on the chair across the room, tapping away at the computer. Jack hums, rolls onto his side.

'Come back to bed.' He calls, and Ralph barely looks up, pushing his reading glasses up the bridge of his nose.

'Can't. I'm working on this new article.' Jack groans and pulls the covers back, climbing out of bed to stand behind him, wrapping his arms across his chest and setting his chin on his head. 'Jack,' Ralph sighs, and leans forward, 'I don't have time to fuck you every morning. This is already late.' Jack hums, kisses the top of his head.

'You want something to eat?'

'Already ate.'

'M'kay. Good luck with it.' Ralph hums, looks away from the screen to twist in his arms, kissing him quickly.

'Thanks. Love you.'

'Oh. Alright.' Ralph smiles, a little too forced, and takes his hand, kisses his knuckles.

 

 

The following day, the fight they have is one of the worst. Although it started about the milk that Jack had gotten, it was probably more about all the actual frustrations built up between them that they refused to talk about. It's bad. Really bad. There's yelling on both ends, and Ralph is close to crying when he gives up, puts his shoes on, and walks out. The door slams behind him, shaking the pictures hung up on the wall.

Later, a car that Jack doesn't recognize pulls up, and he pulls the cigarette from his mouth. Ralph hops down from the passenger seat, and says something to the boy in the driver's street. Jack takes another drag, refusing to stand as Ralph walks over, sits beside him on the front step. It's obvious that he's been crying. Neither of them say anything when Ralph pulls the cigarette from his hand and takes a drag, then leans his head on Jack's shoulder. Jack resists the urge to shake him off when he takes his hand. All he does is take the cigarette back, and sighs, stubbing it out.

'It's getting cold out. Wanna go?' He asks, tilting his head to the door. Ralph sniffs, and nods, sitting up. Jack stands up, but Ralph stays where he is.

'I'm sorry.' He calls when Jack opens the door, foot through it. Jack stops, looks down, then moves to sit down behind Ralph, kissing his head.

'Me too. I've been a dick lately,' Ralph leans back and looks up at the sunset, 'I haven't... I've never loved anyone that wasn't family. It scares me.' Ralph freezes, swallows audibly.

'Are... are you saying what I think you are?' Jack hums, kisses his temple.

'I love you. I love you so much.' Ralph turns, bites his lip, then climbs into Jack's lap, cupping his cheeks.

'Tell me more.' Jack smiles, holds him steady.

'Let's go inside for that.'

 

That morning, Ralph is in bed when he wakes up, still asleep. Jack hums, draping an arm across his back and kissing him gently.

'Mornin'.' Ralph moans and rolls over, pulling him down over him and kissing his shoulder. 'Love you.'

'Say it again,' The shorter boy whispers and Jack hums, murmuring it again into his hair again and again, kissing his hair and temples gently. Ralph laughs every time, a sound that's relieved and just so _happy_. Fuck - Jack loved this boy a lot.

 

  
Things were going good for a while. No fights, no tension. Ralph still asked to get a dog every so often, and Jack still objected to it every time. But that was the only bump in it.

A bump that turned out to be pretty severe.

Jack's phone rings while he's washing dishes, so he wipes his hands off and steps away from the sink before answering.

'Hello?'

'Hey, baby.' Ralph sounds breathless, and there's the distinct sound of several dogs barking in the background. Jack sighs, reaches in to pull the stopper out of the sink. 'Are you busy?'

'What did you do.'

'Nothing! I just... Can you come down to the shelter? Please?'

 

When Jack gets to the shelter a few blocks away, Ralph is sitting on the floor with a dog in his lap, licking his face. He looks up, smiling widely.

'Hey!'

'What's this?'

'A dog.'

'I can see that.' Ralph reaches out with one hand, tugging him down.

'She's a sweetheart. C'mere.' Jack sighs and kneels down, and Ralph smiles up at him, letting the puppy climb over their legs. 'Please?'

'Please what?'

'Could we? Get her?'

'Ralph...' Ralph's eyebrows draw in, and Jack sighs again. He knew that it would be harder to talk Ralph out of it when there was an actual dog there. 'It's a husky. It's gonna get big.'

'Then we can move.' Ralph rises to his knees, kisses him. 'I want a dog so badly, Jack. Please.' Jack sighs, and pulls away.

'I don't.' Ralph pulls back, hurt obvious on his face.

'Oh,' He says, voice breaking. Jack looks down, swallows thickly, 'Okay.' Ralph stands and picks up the dog, handing it back over to the lady behind the counter with a terse smile. Jack stands up behind him, offers his hand. Ralph doesn't take it, and walks out in a brisk pace.

Ralph sleeps on the couch that night.

 

The next night, Ralph is back in their bed, but he has his back to Jack. Jack stares over the curve of his shoulder, and he knows he should've let Ralph get the damn dog. It would be better to deal with walking the thing and training it than it would be to deal with this near-silent treatment.

Jack sighs, kisses Ralph's shoulder quickly, then gets up, finding a pad and paper in the dark. 

 

 

> _Couldn't sleep. Went for a run._

 

 

He comes back noon the next day, and Ralph is waiting for him on the couch, nails bitten down to the beds. He stands when the door opens, and Jack sighs, pushing the hair from his eyes.

'Let me see your arms.'

'What? Why?'

'I got up at 6, and the bed was already cold. No one goes for a fucking run in the middle of the night, Jack!' Ralph balls up the note and throws it at him, missing by at least a foot. 'Show me your fucking arm.' Jack sighs, and extends one, refusing to meet his eyes. Ralph grabs his forearm and stares down at the single, off-brand Band-Aid he had slapped on before leaving Roger's. He curses, then shoves at Jack's shoulder.

'It was one hit!' Jack didn't even feel any different. The edge of  guilt and annoyance had been taken off, but he didn't feel as woozy as he would if he was high.

'Fuck, Jack!' Ralph shoves at him again, 'You're such a fucking - it was one hit this time, but what about next time? Three hits? Or maybe one too many. And you're dead. What the fuck am I supposed to do then?' Jack scoffs, steps around him.

'You'd survive.'

'Fuck off!' Ralph shouts after him, throwing a shoe at him, 'Do you even care? About anything?' Jack stops, rubbing his thumb over his Band-Aid.

'Fine.' He says, shoulders relaxing. He turns on Ralph, who has tears streaming down his cheeks. Ralph straightens up, backing up a step when he walks towards him.

'What?'

'I'm done. With all of this fighting. Call me when you're done being paranoid.' Jack pushes past Ralph, doesn't close the door behind him as he walks down the street, hands shoved in his pockets. He ignores Ralph when he calls his name after him, desperation plain in his voice.

 

The belt is right around his forearm, his hand starting to go numb. He's had three hits since he banged back into Roger's flat, hands numb from the mid autumn chill, and he's about to have his fourth.

'Fuck - he's just so mental these days, y'know? He stopped talking to me because I didn't want to get a fucking dog.' Jack snaps as he slaps at his arm, trying to find a good vein. Roger grunts across the couch, wiping his nose on the back of his hand.

'That's why I don't do commitment, dude. Just do what I do - fuck when you're both high. No real feelings. No responsibilities. Don't date a sober person.' Jack hums and leans back, bouncing his knee.

'Fuck. I can't get a fucking - Are you sure this is even good shit? I've had three and I'm nowhere near high.' Roger leans over him to switch the belt to his other arm for him, pulling it taut and buckling it.

'Give it one more.' He says, holding up the needle. 'Trust me, after two months sober? Better than sex.' Jack's thoughts go to Ralph, and what he sounded like during sex, and he suddenly wants to rip off the belt and go back, apologize over and over and just fuck his boyfriend. If he even was his boyfriend anymore. But he grabs the needle and finds a vein, presses the plunger down slowly.

Almost immediately, everything is gone but bliss, and his breath catches. Distantly, Roger laughs and says something, taking the needle and the belt. What he wouldn't give to have Ralph here, smiling up at him and touching him, kissing him.

But Ralph wasn't. He wasn't here. He probably wasn't smiling.

Jack frowns, curses quietly. He picks up the old credit card from off the table and gathers some of the last bit of cocaine into a short line. He never liked cocaine, but whatever would get his mind off Ralph would be his new bestfriend. He grabs the banknote from the table, rolls it again, and presses it to his nostril, leaning in to inhale sharply.

 

The next day, he feels like shit. So he crashes on the couch to sleep off any nasty after effects that may come to bite him in the ass.

He doesn't know how long he's asleep for, but Roger's there when he wakes up, sitting in a chair and reading a newspaper.

'Thought you might be dead for a bit there.'

'How long was I out?' Roger shrugs.

'I was out for a while too. You should probably see your boyfriend - your phone was ringing off the hook earlier. It woke me up.' Jack mutters an apology and pulls his jacket on, leaving the apartment. He still feels shitty, and he figured that he looked worse.

 

Jack knocks when he gets home. He figured that it was better than just strolling in after being gone for a day or two. A friend of Ralph's - Simon, Jack thinks - answers, eyes going round.

'Shit - he's back!' Ralph appears over Simon's shoulder, and pushes him out of the way, hugging Jack tightly. Jack blinks, but before he can hug back, Ralph is pulling away, pushing at his arm.

'Where the fuck were you?'

'I was at Roger's. Thought that would be obvious.'

'I thought you were dead!' Ralph's voice goes shrill and Jack scoffs.

'I wasn't even gone that long. Chill.'

'A week! You were gone a fucking week. I didn't know what to think, Jack! I kept watching the news, hoping you wouldn't turn up dead in some alleyway.'

'First of all, they wouldn't feature some kid overdosing on the news. Shit happens all the time. Second of all, it was two days, three days tops. All I did was take a couple hits, then sleep it off.'

'Apparently you slept for a week!' Ralph snaps, pulling his phone out to show him the date. Jack curses under his breath, softening.

'Look, I'm sorry, okay? It happens, people relapse all the time. It won't happen again.' He reaches for Ralph, but he rips away, staring at the ground.

'I... I don't believe you.'

'It was one mistake!'

'Several mistakes, actually! Fuck, Jack! I can deal with you being a recovering addict. That's fine. It means that I'm not dating someone who's fucking spineless. But you're not! You're a heroin addict who'll probably OD, because that's you are. That's how your mom was. How your da was, mostly likely.' Jack knows that Ralph knows it hurt. Probably why he said it. But Jack still stumbles back, like he's been struck.

'Ralph -'

'No! I...' Ralph doubles over, quivering. 'I want to break up. This is over. I... I can't.' Jack says his name again, begging him with that one word. Ralph straightens up, steps toward him, jaw clenched. He looks like he might want to fall into his arms and just forget about all of it. Jack certainly wants him to. But he steps away again. 'Goodbye, Jack.' He says, quietly, hoarsely, and steps back past Simon, who looks at him sadly as he closes the door. Through the frosted glass panes, Jack can see Ralph lean against his friend and crumble.

It's the last thing he sees before he turns back and goes to the only thing he knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was gonna have a happy ending where like??? a year later they see each other in the same park and its kinda like their first meeting but bittersweet  
> but i like pain so :)


	17. XIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> another request bc i need to empty out my askbox
> 
> this one is coming in from coffeegrease on tumblr for cuddling while one person is crying. enjoy!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need more post island things in my life so have this kinda forced cuddling bc why not

Ralph had been crying a lot since they boarded the boat.

During the day, he would either be sniffling or holding back sobs that make his shoulders shake and chest heave.

The naval officers around him just sort of seemed fed up with him, so he stayed out of the way, tried not to let anyone see the tears threatening to fall.

It was different at night, when all the other boys seemed to cry or at least have nightmares, whimpering in their sleep. He'd let the sobs wrack his body and the tears flow freely. Still, Ralph tried not to be loud, fearful of disturbing those around him. He balled his fist, pressed it to his mouth, but his sobs still joined those of the other boys. God, he felt like a littl'un.

Behind him, someone sighs, shifts, and there's the sound of covers pulling away from a body, and then the quiet pad of bare feet on wood.

'Move over.' Jack grunts, and Ralph swallows dryly, looking over to (unsuccessfully) squint at him in the dark.

'Why?' He whispers. Although it was dark, and the paint had long been scrubbed away, Ralph still couldn't stop thinking about the way he sat atop that log, holding that spear with that horrific mask of clay slathered over those sharp contours of his face.

'You're making too much noise.' Ralph looks away and knows that the older boy wouldn't back down. So he coughs and scoots to the edge of his cot, and the thin blanket is lifted, and the redhead climbs into his bed. Ralph freezes when his front is pressed to his back, and he wraps his arms across his chest, holding him firm. Although he has stopped sobbing, there are still tears tracking down his cheek and onto the pillow, and he takes the occasional shuddering breath. Jack shifts against his back, and Ralph moves away from the edge, wishing that the taller boy wouldn't crowd him like this. Wishing he would just return to his own cot and let him work this out on his own.

Maybe he should pretend to sleep.  Jack would leave then. He wouldn't sleep like this, would he? Not when it looked so taboo, felt so taboo. Jack Merridew was always and always will be concerned about how others perceive him. The taller boy's hand carelessly wipes at his tears and Ralph clears his throat, staring into the dark. Instead of pretending to sleep, he speaks, his voice a failing whisper.

'Why're you...?'

'I was fed up with all this pathetic sniveling everyone is doing.' Jack mutters. 'Yeah, shit was traumatic. Get over it.' Ralph bites his lip, figuring that pointing out that Jack was the one doing most of the traumatizing was not a smart idea when he could easily be put into a choke hold. Instead, he takes another sharp inhale of breath and swipes at the tears that still insisted on pooling in his eyes.

'Yes, but why are you manhandling _me_?' Jack adjusts himself so his nose is brushing the spot behind Ralph's ear, an action much too intimate for the blond's liking.

'Same reason why I spent the time to hunt you down, I s'pose.' Ralph blinks, and he would've preferred that Jack hadn't answered at all.

'You're insisting on spooning me because of some over-the-top hissy fit?'

'Don't pretend you don't feel it, too.' Ralph lets his hands fall to the pillow, and he pushes them under his cheek as he chews at his lip.

'Feel what?' He manages. He knows what Jack was talking about - that indescribable pull he had felt towards the taller boy, ever since they first met on that beach, smiled at each other on that mountain. Jack is silent, an odd occurrence for the redhead.

'Just... Go to sleep, Ralph.' He murmurs finally, and Ralph wonders if he doesn't elaborate because he doesn't want to or because he can't. Ralph pauses, then, ignoring every instinct which screams for him to get as far as away from this boy as he can as fast as he can, turns so he's half on his other side. If there had be any light in this room, he would've been staring at the sharp curve of Jack's cheekbone. He could tell by the way the taller boy's breath rushes warm over his ear.  
But the lanterns had long been extinguished, and he wouldn't be able to see his hand if he held it a millimeter from his face.

'You're still crying.' Ralph hadn't noticed until Jack had wiped at his cheek with his index finger.

'Sorry.' He mumbled, and turns all the way onto his side. Jack swallows audibly, and shifts his hands so they're clasped and pressed against the small of his back. Their legs tangle together, and a very big part of him is telling him to run, and the hunters' chant is just beginning to swell in his ears again, knowing that this tangling together was just something that the older boy is using to trip him up when he finally relaxed. Then, Jack lets out a nervous breath and tucks his face into his hair.

'This is nice,' He breathes, and Ralph has to wonder if he even means to say it. The portion of him still in hunted mode is settling down, still a urgent tug in the back of his mind, so he sates it by never letting his guard down, muscles coiled tight and body stiff against Jack's, so quickly easing and... trusting. Ralph wondered what that felt like. He swallows, and moves so his cheek is against Jack's, the slightest weight, and he runs his fingers, light, over his bicep.

'Good night.' He mumbles, and Jack hums, already half asleep. Maybe he hadn't climbed into his bed for him, but for himself.

'Night, Ralph.' Jack replies, voice drowsy and thick with some emotion that Ralph can't name. Not yet. That unidentifable emotion gave that small, naive part of him -that ever so trusting part of him that wanted to go lax and sleep in this addictive warmth, sleep away the paranoia and the fear and that constant exhaustion - the hope that the pull between them would allow him to forget his crimes, allow this boy to become another helpless crush, stolen kisses and little rebellions towards his father. Even if they saw each other again after they got off this boat.

Ralph has stopped crying.  
He wouldn't ever give Jack Merridew the time of day, but maybe, just maybe, he would be able to give him a portion of the night.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was hecka short but i kinda??? like it??? idek im not used to post island stuff. also judging by the way im going, this'll be 200k+ by the time i finish it. let me live lmao


	18. XV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an anonymous request for marking and dirty talk
> 
> there is literally no plot. it hops right into the smut. its literally just smut. thats all it is. so. :)

Ralph is pressed into the mattress, cheeks tinged pink. He's naked and already moaning. Jack hums, sucking a mark into his collarbone as he slides his hands up his sides.

'I wanna fuck you so hard right now.' Ralph's hand goes to his hair, gripping hard, holding him down against his throat. Jack grins and bites at his pulse, then sucks another mark into his skin.

'What's stopping you?' Ralph whispers breathlessly, and Jack hums, hands moving to grip his rear, fingers digging into his skin.

'Fuck, baby boy, the things I wanna do to you.'

'Tell me.' Jack hums, pushes his briefs down and pulls away briefly to take them off. Ralph whimpers when he does, and Jack stops to look over him, tracing his fingers up his stomach.

'First, I wanna make you moan, all pretty like you always do. Wanna make you come.'

'How?' Ralph shudders and arches up into his fingers. Jack presses his thumbs over his hipbones hard enough that it would bruise and leans down to bite at his lip. Ralph moans, scrapes his nails up his back.

'All slow and sweet like you like it, baby. How many times do you think you can come for me tonight?' Ralph makes a strangled noise, doesn't quite answer. Jack doesn't mind - he kisses the bitten lip then moves to suck another mark into his jaw. 'Wanna make you come until you're quivering.'

'Then what?' Ralph whispers, and the scratches he is surely leaving behind burn. Ralph swipes his thumb at one of them, leaving Jack to wonder if he is bleeding in some places.

' _Fuck_ \- I wanna fuck you. Long and slow and so gentle you'd barely feel it. 'Til you're begging for more.' Ralph shudders with the anticipation and want. He arches off the body and into Jack's body above him, arms wrapped up under his armpits to curl around and grasp at his shoulders.

'Will you give me more?'

'Of course. I'd give you anything.' Ralph takes a shaking breath and pushes his nose into his hair.

'Can you - do what you said? Please, baby. I need you.' Jack lets out a shuddering breath and nods, leaning in close to the arc of his torso. He mouths at his jaw, reaching between their bodies to stroke his cock slowly. Ralph moans quietly and rolls his hips up into his hand. Jack pauses to shift so he can grind down onto his thigh, pressing his hips back to the sheets.

'Relax, baby boy. Let me take care of you.' Ralph whines and tangles his fingers in his hair as Jack swipes his thumb over the head of his cock, gathering the pre-come that had beaded at the slit. The shorter boy tugs him down to nibble at his earlobe, whimpering into his ear. Jack groans and kisses his temple.

'God, I love those little noises so fuckin' much.' Ralph hums and kisses at his neck, then sucks at the freckled skin until he leaves a dark mark that would take days to fade. Jack tightens his fingers around his length and Ralph gasps, hands flying to his back, nails digging into his skin. Jack hums, and strokes down the length, hand dragging over the skin from how slowly he moved. The blond makes a high-pitched noise and arches into him, gripping at his shoulder blades. Jack does it again, biting a grin back. Ralph whines and grips at his shoulders, pulling him down even further to press his face to his neck.

'Do it again.' Ralph chokes out, kissing his shoulder. Jack does as he's told, and Ralph lurches into him, fingers digging into his skin. The taller boy hums and kisses the crown of his head, murmuring soft praise into his hair as he pulls his hand away to spit on his hand, then continuing with his slow movements. Ralph moans quietly, so muffled against his neck that Jack feels it more than he hears it, lazily bucking up into his hand. 'Fuck - Jack, I'm so close baby. Keep going.' Jack hums and falters a second, considering whether or not he should be cruel and tease him. Immediately, Ralph grabs at his arm and whines, mumbling his name.

'Say my name again, baby boy.' Jack whispers, hand going to his hip. Ralph cries out in dismay from the loss, and presses his hips up against Jack's, whispering his name again and again as he grinds up against him as best he can. Jack smiles into his hair and presses him down again, hand returning to his length, keeping an even pace as he pumps his hand. Ralph sobs out and arches into him, spilling into his fist with a quiet cry. Jack pulls back enough to cover his face in light kisses, using his hand to ride him down from the high. 'You're so fuckin' pretty when you come baby. I could watch that all day if I could.' Ralph falls back to catch his breath, biting his lip when their gazes meet.

'That was good.' He says breathlessly, and Jack grins, sitting back on his heels. Ralph closes his eyes when Jack's hands wander over his torso lazily. As if he hadn't committed this boy's body to memory already.

'It's gonna get even better.' Ralph laughs, opening one eye.

'Why? You gonna fuck me now?'

'Nah. I still gotta make you come 'til you can't stand.' Ralph half-moans and half-whines, slinging his arm across his face.

'Won't take much. I'm already sensitive as all fuck.' Jack hums, brushing his thumb over the head slowly. Ralph curses under his breath and grips at his wrist, torn between pushing him away and pulling him closer. Ultimately, he pushes Jack's hand away, and just lies still for a moment, letting himself rest. Jack leans down, kissing him quickly when he sighs in content, then moves down to settle between his legs.

'What do you think you're doing?' Ralph croaks, arm shifting to press to his forehead.

'I could suck you off.' Ralph's eyes snap open and up to meet his, and Jack smiles, bites his lip.

'Yes please.' Ralph croaks, and Jack hums, looking up from where he lies. Ralph bends them at the knee and frames his head with his thighs, meeting his eyes evenly.

'Don't close your eyes, 'kay?' Ralph nods, pushing his fingers through Jack's hair.

 

Jack wasn't great at giving head. He wasn't bad, but Ralph was much better compared to him.

But that doesn't stop Ralph from cursing into the curve of his wrist as he takes him into his mouth. His other hand presses down at the back of his head, nails digging into his scalp. He still hasn't broken their gazes, even when he had sat up suddenly and lurched forward far enough that, if he had been more flexible, he would've been able to kiss the top of his head.

'It is bad that I'm already close?' He hisses, and Jack pulls back to smile, sliding his thumb along the slick length.

'You literally just came like, two minutes ago. I'd be surprised if you weren't.' Ralph laughs, a breathy sound, and sits back on his elbows. Jack sucks at the head of his cock until Ralph curses and comes again, considerably less this time. Jack swallows, then kisses his hip bone quickly. Ralph's thighs are quivering, and when he brushes his fingertips over the base, his hips jerk away and his thighs press closed around his hand.

'No more. Lemme have a break, okay?' Jack kisses his knee and hums in agreement, pulling his hand free. He lies next to Ralph on the pillows, and Ralph smiles, breathing heavily. He presses a hand to his freckled skin, over his heart, and bites his lip.  
After he's caught his breath, Ralph climbs on top of him, lacing their fingers together and pressing his hands to the pillow by his head. Jack lets out a quiet hiss as he grinds into him.

'Fuck, Ralph -' Jack pulls his hands free to sit up, then lets Ralph press his wrists to the wall, tilting his head back when Ralph kisses his Adam's apple.

'Wanna make you feel good.' Ralph whispers, hips rolling down in an even pace.

'How?' Jack holds back a groan and wets his dry lips. Ralph pulls back to look at him, biting his lip.

'I want to ride you. Hold your arms like this - ' He presses his wrists firmly to the wall ' - so you can't be selfish.'

'Selfish?'

'Try to set your own pace. I'm in charge, m'kay?'

''kay.' Jack croaks, and Ralph smiles, gently. 'Keep telling me things. I love your voice when it's all breathy like this.' Ralph leans in, tugs at his bottom lip with his teeth.

'I want you to come in me,' Ralph whispers, kissing his chin, then his throat, 'I want to hear you moan and feel you squirm under me. But.' Jack's heart almost stops when Ralph pulls back, and he wouldn't put it past him to climb off him and let him take care of himself. He would apologize later and bring him over the edge multiple times to make up for it, but he still hated it in the moment. He moves forward, eyes widening.

'Ralph - '

'Shh, baby. I'm gonna tell you what I also want to do for you,' Jack sits back and swallows, nodding, 'I want you to press me into this mattress, or up against a wall, and take me. Use me,' His cock twitches at the thought, and Ralph smiles triumphantly, grinding down onto him harder. 'Make me scream, baby. Make me yours.' Ralph leans in and kisses over his pulse. 'So what's it gonna be?'

 

Jack has Ralph pressed to the wall by their bed, two fingers pushed into him. He had gotten Ralph to wet them for him, holding them to his lips until he sucked at them, twisting to look over his shoulder at him.   
He must be beyond sensitive by now, something Jack can tell by the noises he makes and how he tries to angle himself so his member wasn't pressed to the painted drywall. Jack kisses his shoulders gently, gripping his hip as he gets him ready, murmuring soft praise into his skin as he presses another finger in to join the others. Ralph makes a soft noise of appreciation and grips the hand over his hip, other hand balling into a fist by his face.

'You're so good for me, Ralph. You take everything so well - ' Ralph inhales sharply when Jack crooks a finger slightly, hand sliding to his elbow, ' - I love it. I love you.' Ralph hums, forehead pressed to the wall.

'We both know that I'd be able to take your cock much better than three fingers.' Jack hums, pulling his hand away, and gently pushing Ralph to press flat to the wall, ignoring the quiet hiss it earns.

'Is that so?' Ralph answers with a meek sound, nodding once. His fingers dig into Jack's thigh, and he pushes his rear back against him. 'How should I know? You felt awfully tight.'

'Please,' Ralph all but sobs, both hands on him now, cheek pressed to the wall so he can look at him, 'Let me show you, I can be good for you.'

'I know you can, baby boy,' Jack pulls his hips forward and Ralph nods, 'But you said that you've had enough. Maybe you should just kneel for me, and I'll come on that pretty face of yours.'

'Whatever - ' Jack presses the head of his cock against his entrance, grabbing the lube from where he had put it on the bedside table, and Ralph bites back a desperate noise, ' - Whatever you think is best. I told you, I'll be good.'

'You'll be good?' There's the sound of the tube uncapping, then it's replaced on the end table.

'Yes, yes, please, I want you to feel good. I'll make you feel good, whatever you deci-' He ends in a loud cry when Jack pushes in without warning, an arm wrapped around his hips. Jack sucks a mark onto the skin of his shoulder blade, then he kisses the nape of his neck, breath washing hot over his skin. Jack's hands are tight over his rib cage, and his hands are locked around his wrists.

'Is this good?' Jack asks, breathless already. Ralph pauses and looks over his shoulder.

'I wanna see you,' He whispers. Admittedly, he didn't think this through all the way, completely disregarding his usual need to face the other boy, kiss Jack, a hint of softness in these rough movements and bruising fingers. Immediately, Jack backs off and lets Ralph turn around, lifting him up onto his length once again. Ralph sighs and nods, head falling against the wall. Jack presses close, and kisses his chin, moving up into him slowly.

'Better?' Ralph nods, letting his chin fall to Jack's shoulder, and Jack moves faster, gripping his rear to keep him supported. Ralph pushes his elbows under his armpits, clinging onto whatever he can hold, pushing his nose into his curls. He opens one eye, catching their reflection in the mirror across the room. He smiles, finger running down a scratch he had left behind.

'You should see the number I've done on your back.' He hums, and Jack pauses to look over his shoulder, swearing softly.

'Fuck off,' He smiles up at him and kisses him gently, then nose along his jaw, 'I'm gonna have to get back at you for that.'

'How many hickies have you left, exactly?' Jack hums, and pauses to leave another one on his throat, just below the sharp angle of his jaw.

'We'll count later.' He starts moving again, and Ralph closes his eyes, leaning his cheek against his head, listening to the soft noises he makes.

 

By the time Jack is close, Ralph is hard again. It isn't so bad that if Jack didn't want to continue, he would be able to ignore it, and it'd go down. Jack notices, barely, and gives him a shaky smile.

'I'll take care of you in the shower after, 'kay?' He whispers, and Ralph nods, pulling him into another kiss.

'I'd be okay with it if you just came in me and that was the end of it.' He whispers after they break apart, and Jack hums, pushing up into him quickly, erratically.

'Nonsense.' Jack chokes out, and Ralph wraps his arms around his neck, pulling him close so he can whisper in his ear.

'We can worry about that later. But for now,' He rolls his hips down, hard, and Jack falters, cursing quietly. Ralph puts on a breathy voice, biting back a smile as he pushes his nose into the soft curls, 'I want you to come in me, daddy.' Jack groans loudly, and spills into him, stumbling under his weight. As soon as he pulls out, Ralph hops down and unsuccessfully holds back a teasing smile.

'Ass.' Jack mumbles after him as he walks into the bathroom, and Ralph smiles at him over his shoulder.

'You know it.'


	19. XIII.iii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you are anyway uncomfortable with drug use/abuse, destructive tendencies, and a VERY dependent jack, this is not the fic for you!!! pls click away i don't wanna upset anyone
> 
> also they are both rlly sad nd fucked up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, first of all, a few people asked for a third part of this  
> second of all, i was gonna do it anyways so  
> 

It's been ten months since Ralph had broken up with Jack, and it's been nine months since Jack has felt anything other than _numb_.

The first two months were he worst. He had used more than he ever had before, teetering in that sweet spot of high out of his mind and dead in a ditch from a heroin overdose. When using, he wasn't concerned. But during those short times when he was something close to sober, he would think about Ralph. If he was dead, he wouldn't be around to win Ralph back. After he thought about Ralph, he would call him. It would always go to voicemail. 

After a while, he stopped leaving voicemails.  
Then he stopped calling all together, and used even more.

The night that his counselor would later call the turnabout was an unusually warm night for late December. He would claim that he decided to go back to rehab because of his mother's memory. But it was a blond that came with a sort-of friend of his, Maurice. The blond smiled shyly and the dark-haired boy leaned over and whispered.

'It's his first time. Be nice.' Jack couldn't work around the bile in his throat when he smiled at the blond who reminded him too much of Ralph, even with his too-light skin and shaggy hair. Nothing about Ralph was shaggy or too-anything.  
He still ended up in his bedroom on the hand-me-down mattress, fucking the blond and moaning a name that isn't his. The blond is beyond caring, too-thin fingers knotted in his hair in the wrong way. Jack would pull back every so often and take a hit of whatever drugs he had brought in when they had banged into his bedroom, and the blond would make distant grabby hands at it.

By the time he's spent, he can't even get up, so he half-tumbles off the blond, who disappears in the hall, much better off than he was. He crawled onto the ratty mattress and called Ralph, so desperate to hear his voice that he settled for the voice message, hanging up twice and redialing before he finally left a message.

'Hey. I... I did some stupid shit. I'm kinda scared. I really wish you were with me right now, baby. Shit. Sorry. I guess I can't call you that anymore,' He swallows, brings his phone away from his mouth to shudder and grip at the foam, 'Uhm. Anyways. I hope that you got that dog you really liked. I hope you're happy and loved. I still love you. 'Kay. Bye.' There would be a time where Ralph would call him back immediately and come over and hold him close, just like he held him through his other anxiety attacks, kissing his head and murmuring soft words. Jack had never had an attack while high. He didn't like it.

Later, he would never tell his counselor that he got sober for Ralph. She probably already knew that everything he did was for him.

 

After he woke up in the hospital, and a severe-looking doctor had told him that he had almost overdosed, he decided that it was time to go back to rehab. He couldn't stop thinking about Ralph had said, when everything had went to shit. When he started using again. He wouldn't do that to him. Couldn't.

 

It's been ten months since Ralph broke up with Jack, and he's spent every day after the sixty days spent in rehab sitting on the bench where he first saw Ralph. Where Ralph first approached him.

He checks his phone for the date, then pulls out the stupid pocket journal his counselor made him carry around. He only writes the date when shoes scuffle to a stop in front of him, and then the scrape of nails on pavement. Someone curses softly, the jangling of a collar and a name spoken through gritted teeth when a black nose pushes to Jack's knee.

'Shit - Bruno, down! I'm so -' Jack knew that voice. It was sort of pathetic how quickly he looked up.

Ralph is staring down at him, wide  eyed. He closes the journal and swallows thickly.

'Jack.' Ralph mumbles, taking a step back, then two forward. Suddenly, he's sitting beside him, hand tight over his wrist. 'Oh my god. I...'

'Hey.' The dog is sniffing at their knees, whining. Ralph pushes it away with his foot. 'You got your dog.'

'I'd rather I had -You know what? Never mind.' Jack doesn't push him, although he has a sinking feeling that he was going to say _you_ , 'I heard what happened. Through the grape vine.'

'Grape vine?'

'Your friend Maurice? Knows my friend Simon's sister. I was over at Simon's when they talked about it. It was before you got out. I thought you were dead. I kind of... Cried a lot, that day.'

'That was two and a half months ago. You thought I was dead?'

'Well, I found out you were in rehab, obviously. I'm... I'm so glad you're in a good place.' Ralph squeezes his knee and smiles shakily. Jack stares at his shoes.He can't look at that smile, those dark circles. Knowing he was the one who did that to him.

'Why didn't you return my calls?' He croaks. Ralph was in the middle of saying something else, but he stops cold. 'I know I called you when I...'

'I know. I'm sorry. But - I couldn't. You know? I hate hearing you all torn up like that. Knowing I was the one who fucked you up again. I figured it was better to let you figure out your shit in rehab. If things were still bad, I would've...' Jack swallows thickly. He had dreamed of this happening for the last ten months. Seeing Ralph again. But it was all wrong. So wrong.

He looks at the hand on his wrist, on his knee, and pries them away.

'Ralph - I... I can't. My... I'm gonna be late for work.' He looks at him, and Ralph looks close to tears. The blond gives him a quivering smile.

'Oh. Yeah, of course.' Jack stands, checks his phone. Work didn't start for another two hours. Ralph stands up behind him, says his name again. Then, he steps up and wraps his arms around him, holding him steady. His cheek is pressed to the space between his shoulder blades, and Jack wants to turn around, hug him back. Forget all that has happened and start over with this boy. He leans back into him, laying his hands over his.

'Ralph,' He manages around the thick lump, and Ralph sniffs, pulls back and picks up the leash again.

'Yeah. Um. Okay. Bye.' Jack doesn't want to watch him walk away, but he does, turning to stare after him, retreating down the path, drawn smaller than he's ever seen him.

 

Two days pass, and Jack still hasn't gotten over that day in the park. He had wanted to call him that night, give him his new address, show him that he actually had a bed now. Actually could afford some things. But he hadn't.

It's his day off, and he's meeting with his sponsor at some high end coffee shop - 'Don't worry,' The fat man had reassured, Paul, 'I'll pay.' - Jack rubs at the healing spots with his thumbs while he waits for Paul. He had already bought himself a tea. He needed something warm, calm his nerves. He hadn't even told his counselor about Ralph. But Paul was different. He got this kind of shit.

'Sorry I'm late, son.' Usually, Jack would've snapped at anyone who would've called him that. But something about the man's breathless, warm voice and ruddy cheeks calmed him, told him he wasn't patronizing him.

'Oh, uh. It's okay.'

'So, what's going on?' The man sits down across from him, flags down the waiter. Jack picks at his already fraying sleeve, swallowing thickly.

'I saw him. The other day.' Paul goes silent, waiting for him to continue. If he told his counselor, she would've prompted him to continue, or put his feelings down in that stupid pocket journal. But Paul was unhurried, willing just to listen and walk him through this. 'I thought I'd be happy.'

'You aren't?' Jack shakes his head, running his index finger over the rim of his mug.

'No. I'm... I don't want to hurt him, y'know? I know that I'll fuck him up. Even if I don't relapse.' His sponsor shifts in his seat then.

'Do you feel the need to? Use again?'

'I kind of wanted to. The night after I saw him. But I didn't.'

'Well, that's good, son. You've been really good so far.' Jack nods, picking at the pills of his jumper.

'I think he wants to... Maybe he wants to get back together? He knows I've got my act together. I think. Wouldn't he want to?' Jack wanted him to. Paul smiles at him, and pats his hand.

'I s'ppose you need to ask him that.'

 

Jack's sitting on his balcony, playing with the first token he had gotten when his phone chimes with Ralph's tone he had set a month into their relationship. He tries not to scramble for his phone. He fails.

 

> _I saw you today_

Jack chews his nail, ignoring that it had been bitten down to the quick.

 

> _Oh_  
>  _I didn't see you_
> 
> _Was that your father?_
> 
> _No. Pauls my sponsor_

Ralph takes a moment to reply, and Jack lights his last cigarette, taking a long drag.

 

> _Thats cool_  
>  _You looked sad_
> 
> _I always look sad_
> 
> _Sorry_
> 
> _It isnt your fault_

That last text was a lie. It was his fault. But Jack decides not to. His phone rings, and he waits for three rings to go before he picks up. Ralph's voice is hoarse on the other end. He's been crying.

'Where are you?'

'I'm sorry?'

'Do you still live with Roger?' Jack is surprised that he didn't know, with his whole grapevine thing.

'No. I got my own place.'

'That's... That's really good, Jack. Away from temptations.' Jack swallows, wondering if he would wake up from this complicated nightmare if he stubbed his cigarette out on some place on his body.

'What do you want, Ralph?' He croaks, and Ralph makes a small noise that sounds too much like a sob for his liking.

'I really wanna... I wanna see you again. I can't stop thinking about you. Are you getting enough to eat? Can you afford your bills? Do you like your job?'

'It's fine.'

'Where do you work?'

'Starbucks. And my sister's husband's office, on weekends.'

'That's good,' Ralph says again, 'Where do you live?'

'Why do you wanna know?' Something shifts on the other end, and Ralph coughs, the sound muffled.

'I just... I want to make this right. I want to make us right.'

'There hasn't been an _us_ for a year.'

'Can we... Can we change that? I regretted what I said as soon as I said it. Y'know?' Jack doesn't answer, but Ralph continues regardless, 'I still love you, Jack. I still really, _really_ love you.' Maybe it's the way he says it. Or maybe it's just because he said it, period. But Jack closes his eyes again, bending forward and wrapping his arm across his stomach. He gives Ralph his address.

 

Ralph is there in ten minutes, although their old place was across town, in a nicer neighborhood. Jack wonders if he still lived there. As soon as he opens his door, Ralph is there, arms wrapped tight around his middle as he pulls him close, pressing his cheek to his chest. Jack stares over his head, forcing himself to hug back. Ralph shudders against him when he does, knees buckling. It brings them both down, kneeling on the floor, and Jack softens into him, finally letting his guard go down. He curses into his hair softly, and Ralph laughs against him. Jack tightens his arms across his back, and he never wants him to pull away. Never wants this to end. Ralph seems to have the same train of thought, because he pushes against him, hands curling tight into his shirt.

Ralph is the one who pulls back, tear tracks on his cheeks. Jack wants to kiss them away, he hated seeing him cry. Instead, he just watches as Ralph wipes at his cheeks with his hands, then stands to move deeper into his flat. Jack closes the door behind himself, and follows at a safe distance as Ralph looks around the small living room.

'You don't have any decorations.' He says, finally. Which was true. All he had bought in terms of living was a bed, a dresser, a sofa, and a coffee table. He had two place settings, and never used one of them.

'That's not true.' He mumbles, when Ralph notices the two ashtrays on the coffeetable. One is full of his H.A. chips, the other cigarette butts. An unopened pack is on the ground by the table. Ralph walks down the short, tiny hall and into his even smaller bedroom. Jack was sure that it was supposed to be a closet. Ralph sits on his bed.

'You don't even have a mirror, Jack.'

'There's one in the bathroom. I don't need more than that.' Ralph twists to look at him.

'You can't just exist. You need... personal things. Make yourself big again.' He should talk. Even in the tiny flat, Ralph seems minuscule, arms wrapped around himself. Maybe he had been as fucked up as Jack was about the split. They just had different ways of showing it. He sits beside him, and Ralph smiles up at him, hopeful and verging on wide.

'Can we make a deal?' Ralph hesitates, then nods.

'If you stay away, I'll go out and buy some painting or something.' Ralph deflates, and chews at his lip. 'I can see that you're already messed up because of me. I don't wanna make it worse.' Ralph turns towards him, and swallows.

'Guess I'll have to settle for you having barren walls.' Jack sighs, but he doesn't object. Instead, he meets his eyes, then leans forward to press their foreheads together. Ralph cups his cheek, moving forward in what looks like the beginning of a kiss. But he stops himself and slides his fingers through the curls at the base of Jack's neck.

'I still have a deal, then.' Jack whispers.

'As long as it's not about me staying away. Or you staying away. I hate it.'

'It's not,' Ralph softens against him, and Jack wonders how it feels to be willing to do something like that so soon, 'We can't kiss. Or fuck. Or... Do anything. Not for a while. I'll see you, I'll talk. But I'm not gonna rush into this again.'

'The rushing wasn't the problem.' Ralph mumbles, but nods anyways. Jack sighs, falls against him.

'You should go home. Look after that dog of yours.' Ralph nods, pulling him close for a moment, breathing in through his nose, then letting him go, getting up. In the doorway, he stops, and speaks softly.

'I'll never stop loving you, Jack. I'll wait for forever if that's what you want.' Jack doesn't answer, bent forward and looking at his wall. The floorboards squeak, and Ralph takes a breath to say something else. Then he pads down the hall quietly, and the front door is shut behind him carefully. As soon as the apartment is quiet, Jack answers.

'Me, too.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idek if heroin anonymous has sponsors and chips, but supposedly its based off of alcohol anonymous so??? i just assumed that there was those things too lmao
> 
> anyways i ended this in a way that i could do a fourth part maybe  
> (i love this au sm shh)


	20. XVI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> there will be a day where i stop writing daddy kink oneshots  
> today is not that day

The phone in Jack's office rings an hour before he was done with work, and Ralph's voice is breathless on the other end.

'Daddy,' Jack bites his lip and sits back in his seat, eyes going up to his open door.

'Hey, baby boy. Didn't I say that this number was emergencies only?' He opens his desk drawer and turns on his phone, scrolling through the multiple texts and missed calls from Ralph.

'You didn't answer your cell.' He whines, 'And it _is_ an emergency.'

'What's wrong, baby boy?'

'I need you, Daddy.' Jack glances at the clock, bites his lip.

'I don't clock out for another hour, sweetness,' Ralph whines again, an edge of desperation in his tone.

'Please. Please, please, _please_ , Daddy, I need to come.' Jack hums.

'Are you touching yourself, baby boy?'

'Yes,' Jack bites his lip, picturing Ralph writhing under his own hand and gripping at the sheets as he moaned and shuddered into the pillows. He presses his hand over his own erection in an attempt to calm it, and takes a shaky breath.

'Stop. You can come when I get home. Any earlier than that, and I won't even look at that cock of yours.'

'But _Daddy_ ,'

'If you're gonna be brat, don't bother. You know the rules. Brats and bad boys don't get fucked.' Ralph whimpers.

'Okay.'

'I'll be home soon, yes?' He ends the call, and checks the messages that Ralph had sent earlier, chewing on the pad of his thumb.  
This was going to be the longest hour of his life.

 

Despite his desperation to get home, Jack takes his time. He takes the long way home, stopping for two lattes and something for Ralph to eat after.

When he gets home, soft noises come from the bedroom. Jack suppresses a smile and shuts the door carefully, locking it behind him.

Ralph is preoccupied when he stands in the doorway, stroking his length and moaning into his fist. Jack hums and clears his throat, and Ralph jumps, eyes snapping open, and he wets his lips guiltily. Jack sets the bag and tray of coffee cups on the dresser and steps to the foot of the bed.

'Knew you couldn't help yourself.' He murmurs, and before Ralph can say anything, he grips him by the ankles and pulls him down the length of the bed until his knees dangle over the edge, making Ralph squeak in surprise. Jack kneels and kisses up his thighs. 'And to think I was gonna give you a reward for waiting for me.' Ralph whines, head falling back.

'What... was it gonna be?' Jack smiles and sits back on his heels, loosening his tie.

'Why should I tell you?'

'Because you love me?'

'I suppose so,' Jack leans back and takes off his shoes, 'I was gonna suck that pretty cock of yours until you came. Maybe longer and get you to come again.' Ralph shudders and Jack removes his dress shirt.

'Could you... Still do it?'

'I suppose I could get you to come so many times that you couldn't stand it anymore. As a punishment.' Ralph nods quickly, and Jack hums, pushing his hands up his thighs. He leans forward and kisses his hipbones. 'Remember the colors?' Ralph nods again, and Jack takes his length into his mouth, sucking relentlessly, never looking away from Ralph.  
Ralph sobs and grips at his hair with one hand, stifling the noises he makes with the other. Jack reaches up and presses that wrist to his chest, pulling back to speak.

'Let me hear you.' Ralph whimpers and nods, moaning quietly when he presses lingering kisses up his length, then takes him back into his mouth. Ralph cries out and curses under his breath, nails digging into Jack's scalp.

It doesn't take much for Ralph to teeter over the edge, spilling into Jack's mouth. Jack pulls back and swallows, ignoring the taste when Ralph flushes a dark pink, chest heaving. Jack kisses his thighs and waits for Ralph to calm down.  
As soon as Ralph lets out a shuddering breath, Jack leans in to suck at the head of his cock, stroking the shaft until he hardens again. When he's hard again, Ralph is whimpering, a mix of pain and pleasure that makes Jack's cock twitch in his slacks. He bobs his head quickly, lips tight around his length, and Ralph moans and writhes, fingers curling tight into the sheets below him. Jack looks up at him and goes down as far as he can go, gagging and pulling back.  
He strokes his length quickly, harshly, and kisses his hipbones. Ralph sobs out his name as he comes again, and Jack doesn't even let him recover before he's sucking at him again, wiping his hand on his slacks. Ralph cries out and grips at his hair, and his cock is barely hard in his mouth when he's coming again. Jack's about to continue when Ralph pulls at his hair, _hard_.

'Wait - wait, Jack - ' He manages, and Jack sits back, looking up at him, ' - No more, yeah?' Jack nods, and kisses his knee.

'Mhm - yeah, no problem. C'mere.' He murmurs, climbing up onto the bed. Ralph weakly crawls into his lap, kissing him softly. Jack places a hand on his hip, and kisses the corner of his mouth. 'Tell me when you wanna keep going.' He whispers, and Ralph nods silently, catching his breath. He rubs his back soothingly, kissing his shoulder. Ralph slowly grinds down on him, and he can feel him smile against his neck when he curses, fingers pressing into his flesh.

'Daddy,' He whispers, and Jack swallows thickly, nosing along his jaw, 'I still want you.'

'That so?' Ralph nods, and Jack kisses his temple, 'I suppose that you did take your punishment well. Get up, baby boy.' Ralph climbs off his lap and helps him remove his belt, his slacks. Ralph scoots back up the bed, settling against the pillows. Jack pulls off his briefs and kneels between his open knees, gripping his hips and pulling him closer, lifting him to a good angle. 'Color, pretty boy?' He asks quietly, reaching for the lube.

'Green. So fucking green.' Ralph murmurs, and Jack coats his length in lube, wiping the excess off at his entrance. He pants his hands on either side of his head, leaning in close as he slides in slowly. Ralph moans quietly when the head of his cock works past the tight ring of muscle, and Jack bites back a groan.

'Relax, sweet boy.' Jack whispers, gently gripping his throat. Ralph nods, tipping his head back to expose his neck. Jack slides in all the way, holding still as he tightens his fingers. Ralph whines quietly and shifts under him, hips pressing him. Jack hums and increases the pressure until Ralph's breath hitches, and starts moving in him, slow and steady. When Ralph moans softly, Jack picks up the pace, and Ralph leans up to press his nose into the crook of his neck, pulling him down close, legs wrapping up around his waist. Jack pulls out all the way, ignoring the soft sob from Ralph as the blond tries to press back down. He leans back to look at his face, pressing down on his throat.

'Daddy, c'mon.'

'Tell me how much you want me, baby boy. Beg for it.' Ralph whines and his fingers dig into his shoulders. He presses the head of his cock against his entrance, waiting in silence.

'I want it - _fuck_ \- so bad, Daddy. I want you so bad. _So_ fucking bad. I want your cock, your... your mouth. Your hands - ' Jack grasps his cock gently, and Ralph cries out, ' - Oh god, I want all of you. All at once. Please, Daddy, I want you so badly. I need you.' Jack bites back a grin and presses forward. Ralph's voice is hoarse and high-pitched when he moans out his name. 'Ohmigod, thank you, thank you, thank _you_.' Jack hums and presses all the way in. Ralph scrambles at his back when he starts moving, quick and controlled, gripping his throat tightly. Ralph's breathing is hoarse, but not obstructed enough for Jack to be concerned. He lets himself let go, chase his orgasm.

'Fuck, baby, I'm so close. I'm so so close.'

'Come in me, Daddy. Please,' Ralph whispers, and Jack moans, stopping full on and groaning loudly as he spills into him. He thrusts a few more times, then pulls out, kissing Ralph's temple before unceremoniously tumbling off of him. Ralph rolls onto his side and drapes himself onto his chest, kissing him.

'You good?' Jack manages, breath heavy. Ralph hums and kisses his collarbone.

'So fucking good.' Jack runs his fingers through his hair and pulls him into a long kiss. When they break apart, Ralph bites his lip and looks up at him adoringly. Jack cups his cheek and rubs his thumb over his cheekbone. He tugs him close and sighs in content.

'Love you.' He mumbles and kisses his temple. Ralph hums and wraps his arms around his waist.

'Mhm - love you too.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok ok so time for another break from this hell  
> (jk jk im having a lot of fun doing these)
> 
> im gonna be rewriting an old fic from when i was in the maze runner fandom bc i wanna start being more active in the fandom again  
> so if you aint in that fandom its gonna be a hot minute before you see anything from me again lmao  
> eat ass suck a dick and sell drugs <3


	21. XVII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is a request from the-nerve-of-the-girl on tumblr for jack watchin ralph dance  
> so  
> here is some dancey wancey for you  
> 

'Remember, you can't touch me unless I say you can.' Ralph murmurs against the shell of his ear over the music he had put on, and Jack hums, leaning back in the chair that Ralph had sat him in. The blond bites his lip and puts enough distance between them that he was out of Jack's reach. Jack chews his thumbnail and makes a small noise in the back of his throat when Ralph rolls the hem of his shirt up over his stomach and starts swaying his hips.

He steps closer and hums along to the music as he pulls his shirt off, tossing it away. Jack leans forward, biting his thumb.

'Fuck, baby. You have no idea how hot you look right now.' Ralph grins and leans in to cup his cheeks, running his fingers through his hair. Jack smiles and leans up to try and kiss him, but Ralph presses two fingers to his lips and presses him back.

'Nuh uh. No touching, right?' Jack scoffs and settles back again, curling his fists into his jumper and nodding. Ralph turns and bends to take off his shoes slowly, and Jack lifts his hips from the chair to push his trousers down, biting the inside of his cheek as he removes his jumper, too.

'How can I not touch when you're practically shoving your arse in my face?' Ralph hums when Jack grasps his rear, and leans back into it for a moment before straightening up and turning to press him back with a hand planted to his chest.

'Do I need to tie you down?' He warns quietly, the hand running down Jack's stomach, 'Just let me do this for you, Jack.' Jack sighs in resignation and rests his hands on the arms of the chair.

Ralph straightens up and continues to sway as the song fades out and is replaced by a slower, softer song. The movements of his hips become languid figure-eights as Ralph lowers his eyelids and watches him through his lashes.

'Next time, you should dance with me.' He murmurs, and Jack almost misses it he says it so softly, wetting his lips and swallowing. 'But not right now. I wanna put on a show for you.'

Jack starts to palm at himself, chewing at the thumbnail of his other hand, as Ralph slowly pulls the belt from his jeans, dropping it to the carpeted floor, where it lands with a soft thump. He pushes it behind him and unbuttons his jeans, then pulls the fly down, biting his lip as he steps closer.

'Help me with them?' He asks quietly, and Jack leans forward quickly, eagerly. He moves to pull his jeans down with one jerk, but Ralph places his hands over his, leaning down to kiss him gently, 'Go slow.' He commands in a quiet voice, and Jack swallows, nodding as he meets his eyes, tugging the denim over his hips and down his thighs. Ralph steps out of them one leg at a time. Jack tosses the jeans away and sits back, biting his lip. Ralph takes his face in his hands as he climbs into his lap, kissing the redhead slowly, lazily rolling his hips down against his.

'You're ridiculously pretty. God, Ralph, I love you so much.' Jack whispers against his cheek and kisses his jaw. Ralph hums and slides his fingers through his hair. 'I wanna fuck you so bad right now.' Ralph laughs softly and reaches between them and snakes his hand under his briefs to run his fingertips over his length. Jack groans and bucks up into his hand. 'Please. I'd do anything, Ralph. Just - I need you.' Ralph leans back and bites his lip to press his mouth into a serious line.

'How bad, baby? Tell me.' He urges, working Jack's briefs down past his rear.

'So bad. So fucking bad. I can't handle you being so close like and not giving you everything I can.' The redhead lifts his hips as best he can with Ralph perched in his lap as precariously as he is, and the blond steadies himself before managing to get his briefs down around his thighs. Jack sits back down and Ralph climbs from his lap to take his briefs off all the way, then tug his own down.

'Maybe I shouldn't be so close then.' Ralph whispers, but Jack grips onto his hips before he can move away, and Ralph smiles, stepping between his knees when he spreads them.

'That's not what I meant, and you know it.' Jack murmurs back, and Ralph hums when he leans up to kiss along his jaw.

'You're breaking the rules.' Jack laughs softly and pulls him back into his lap.

'Fuck your rules.' He breathes against his skin, and Ralph hums, nudging his legs closed to straddle him, rising into his knees to look into his eyes.

'Fuck me.'

 


	22. XIII.iv

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you are anyway uncomfortable with drug use/abuse, destructive tendencies, and a VERY dependent jack, this is not the fic for you!!! pls click away i don't wanna upset anyone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> surprise, im a messy bitch and im doing another part of this shit au bc i love pain and im a predictable hoe

When Ralph had seen Jack, he looked miserable.

He seemed to always look miserable nowadays - paler than ever, thinner than ever. Even his freckles seemed subdued.  
He looked miserable in the park. In that coffee shop, across from the man who Ralph had assumed was his father. He looked especially miserable, in that barren flat that was as empty as Jack looked, as Ralph felt.

He looks miserable now, sat across him in this cheap restaurant, pressing his fingers into the tongs of his fork. It's better, Ralph supposes, than pressing his fork into the crook of his arm, like he used to do when the urges got bad. Ralph reaches across the table without thinking, gently moving the fork away. Jack looks up to him, eyes round and red rimmed. He looked about as tired as Ralph felt.

It killed him to know that he was the one who fucked him up this badly.

'If we're gonna do this... I want to forget about last time. Start new. You know?' Ralph edges forward in his seat, pulling his hand back across the table. Jack seems to turn this over in his mind, as he nods slowly, then drops his gaze, nodding again, quicker this time.

'Yeah... yeah, that's probably. For the best.' He mumbles, and Ralph manages to smile at him. 'So. Um. How've you been?'

'Um. Good. Really good.' His smile turns shaky, and he knows that his lie was written clearly across his face. Jack runs his hands along the edge of the table and nods again. 'But I... I really missed you. Did I tell you that? You know that, right?' Ralph watches his Adam's apple bob, and he brings his chair forward until the table presses into his stomach. When they talked like this before, he used to trace the instep of his foot up Jack's calve and lean on his hand, listen to whatever Jack was saying. But Jack wasn't saying much today, and Ralph sits as straight as a board in his chair, feet tucked between the legs.

'I know. I... I missed you too. Um. Obviously.' Jack laughs nervously, and Ralph allows himself to smile.

'So, is this our first date?' Jack flushes and drops his gaze again, 'Because we never really... We always just stayed at home, before. We moved so quickly.' Jack is silent for a long time before speaking, voice hoarse and muscles tense.

'I thought... I thought that we wouldn't talk about that. Before.' Ralph looks away, and wishes that their food would just arrive already.

'Oh. Yeah. Of course.' Out of the corner of his eye, he sees one of Jack's hands push across the table, reach for him. Then the redhead pulls back, and there's another pang of guilt in Ralph's stomach.

They both sit back in their chairs, and Jack picks up his fork, suddenly finding it very interesting. Ralph watches as he sets it down again, then picks it up, then repeats this pattern several times, holding his breath. Then, Jack presses it into his forearm, thumb pressed to the blunt end like it was a syringe, and Ralph can't breathe, can't even snatch it away like he used to do. Instead, he just stares down at his place mat and wraps his arms around himself.

 

Jack walks him home, making sure to keep a safe distance between them. They take up the entire sidewalk because of it - good thing it was getting late. Ralph pulls his keys from his pocket and stops at the steps of his new flat. Jack looks up at the building, then back at him, frowning slightly.

'You moved.'

'Yeah.'

'When?'

'A few months after we... You know.'

'Oh.'

'Yeah.' They stand in silence, and Ralph bites his lip, climbing up the first step, not failing to notice that they were at the same height now. 'Um. Okay. Goodnight.' He watches Jack take a step forward, then look away.

'Yeah. Sleep well, okay?'

'Okay. Get home safe.' At the last moment, Ralph reaches home and takes his hand, squeezing it gently, 'Be safe period, okay?' Jack glances up quickly, then looks back down, nodding. Ralph lets go of his hand, and watches him walk to the bus stop before going in.

He should've kissed him.

* * *

A week passes by, and the only communication they have is the occasional text.   
The end of another sleepless night is marked by his phone ringing. Ralph groans as if it was an inconvenience and he wasn't just lying on his floor with his dog on his chest, staring at the ceiling. He manages to get his phone from his back pocket without disturbing Bruno, and answers without looking at the ID.

'H'llo?'

'Ralph - fuck, it's so early - fuck, I'm gonna... I'll call back - ' Ralph cranes his neck to look out the window. The sun was nowhere near up yet. He rubs a hand over his face.

'Jack?' Ralph sits up as best he can with a 50 pound husky on his chest, 'Are you okay?' Jack is laughing, a gasping sort of sound that sounds more like sobbing. Maybe he is crying. It's been too long for Ralph to tell the difference.

'I... I did something really stupid. I really fucked up, I think. Fuck - I just got a chip - ' Ralph gently pushes his dog up and scrambles to his feet, biting his nail.

'What...' _What did you do?_ 'What happened? Are you at home? Are you okay?'

'I'm... Fuck, Ralph, I don't know...'

'Where are you?' Ralph knows what's happened, deep down. Knows that Jack would never change, _old habits die hard_. Jack doesn't answer, so he asks him again, managing to calm his breathing before he started to hyperventilate. Jack swallows, then tells him. Ralph checks the time. There was no way any bus would be running at 4 in the morning.

 

Ralph is there in ten minutes, nails chewed down to the quick. The door is unlocked, so he lets himself in, calling Jack's name.

'In here.' It's muffled, and Ralph makes sure to lock the door before following the sound.

  
He finds him in his closet of a bedroom, sitting on his bed, staring at his hands.

'I really fucked up.' He whispers, and Ralph doesn't hesitate to sit beside him, forgetting about his own wounds for the time being.

'What happened?'

'I... Started. Again. I just came out of it this morning and... Fuck, please don't... Don't leave again. I know I'm so... I'm so bad for you, and I don't deserve you but _fuck_ , Ralph, I don't think I'd be able to handle it if you - '

'I'm not gonna leave, Jack. Start new, remember? We can get you back into rehab, we can try harder. I won't leave. Ever, 'kay?' Ralph takes his face in his hands, and Jack looks up, desperation clear on his face. Ralph couldn't remember the last time he had touched anyone this intimately, before Jack. He swallows and drops his hands to his shoulders, then runs them down the lengths of his arms to grasp his wrists gently. He tugs his arms into his lap and leans against him.

'Don't... Don't make me go back. To rehab. I can't... I can't be away from you like that again.' Ralph swallows and smooths his thumbs over the curves of his wrists.

'You won't. If you don't want you. I won't make you do anything you don't want to.' It hurts Ralph to say it, but he doesn't hesitate to say it. He couldn't hurt Jack, especially not when he was already so torn, open and ragged. Jack needed help, and they both knew it. And it was the kind of help that Ralph didn't know how to give him. He lets go of his wrists to cup his cheeks. 'Okay?'

'I love you,' Jack breathes, and Ralph smiles softly, edging closer. 'Fuck. Fuck, Ralph, fuck - shit, I love you a lot. Too much.' He buries his nose in his neck and grabs at Ralph's shirt with desperate, shaking hands. Ralph cradles his head to his chest and looks up at the ceiling, smiling and silently thanking every deity out there that they were _alive_ and Jack was well enough to still be able to string sentences like this together, that they could maybe, just maybe, be allowed to put each other back together again and stay together.

'I love you, too.' He whispers, and he doesn't even care that he's crying.

 

They stay like that until the sun rises, wrapped up in each other. They don't even move, they don't even speak. Ralph does doze off a few times, but Jack always pulls him closer or shifts enough to pull him back to semi-alertness, dazed from the warmth of the other boy. Ralph hadn't even realized how numb he was until now, when every feeling he had blocked out over the last year comes crashing over him with a rawness that _hurts_. Jack is the one who breaks the silence, shifting back to look back at him.

'Kiss me.' His voice is as ripped raw as Ralph's chest feels. Ralph looks at him for a long time, and he whispers it again, desperation plain in his tone. Ralph swallows and presses as close as possible. 'Kiss me. Please, Ralph, just... I know I said I wanted... I just want you to kiss me. Just once.'

When he does, it's long and desperate and all Ralph can taste is the salt of their tears.

And he couldn't ask for something better.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> unless i get a buncha requests or whatever to do more, this is the last thing ill do for this hell of an au so if u weren't a fan of it it's over now


	23. XVIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is another self indulgent (surprise surprise) au nd it's!!! vampire!jack bc i???? have no self control
> 
> if blood, blood sucking/biting, dangerous situations or like??? vampires???? in general??? squig you out don't read this please! ❤

Jack loved Ralph's neck.

Just like the rest of him, it was so warm. Alive. So _alive_.

He noses along it now, pressing soft, little kisses to his pulse, and Ralph whimpers, pressing his tightly closed fist to the back of his head. Jack tries not to breathe, knowing that being this close to his neck would be too tempting. It was hard even now, feeling his heart flutter and his blood pound, just out of reach. He grabs at Ralph's shirt, making fists in the cotton, and pulls at it to keep himself grounded, put most of his focus on keeping his fangs away. Ralph hums, and the vibrations makes Jack shudder.

'You're gonna rip another shirt at this rate.' His whisper is breathless and needy, like it gets when he's desperate for something to get off on. Desperation makes Ralph reckless - Jack swore he _wanted_ him to drain him dry - and a reckless Ralph was a dangerous one.

'Sorry.' He mumbles, mouth full. Jack pulls away to cover his mouth and pull his fangs back. Ralph had distracted him, and his teeth had slid out. He still wasn't sure how it worked, but he didn't want to risk anything.

'Lemme see,' Ralph sits up, takes his hand and pulls it from his mouth. Jack sighs, drops his gaze as he opens his mouth. Ralph grins and slides his thumb over one of them, testing it's sharpness. If he drew blood, it would be a disaster. Jack jerks back, his flat teeth replacing the six fangs that were too long to fit properly. Ralph bites his lip and studies his face. 'Would I be going too far if I asked you to bite me?'

'Yes.' He grits out, and Ralph bites his lip, presses his pelvis up into his thigh.

'It'd feel much better than tying me up. For both of us.'

'I haven't fed today.'

'You can. I'll stop you if you take too much.' _Take._ Jack hated that word.

'Ralph...' He sighs, and Ralph whines. A desperate Ralph is a dangerous Ralph.

'Please? We can use a safe word if you really want to.'

'If I lose control, a safe word won't matter.'

'You won't. I trust you.'

'I don't.'

 

Jack doesn't know how it happens, but Ralph ends up in his lap, and all six of his fangs are back out - four on the top row, two on the bottom - and he is tracing them along his pulse. Ralph's breath hitches, and he tilts his head back - like he's a lamb inviting a coyote tear into it's throat. Jack licks along the arch of his neck and presses his thumb over his windpipe as Ralph desperately presses himself against his thigh, grinding down.

'Please.' He whispers, and Jack sighs, pulling back.

'You sure?' He asks, instead of objecting. Ralph nods and pulls him back down. Jack swallows thickly, then nibbles at an artery, just hard enough that Ralph's hips would snap down and he would whine, long and high. He shifts away from the artery - spilling too much blood was just asking for something to go wrong - and sinks his teeth into the soft spot just under Ralph's jaw. He goes slowly, as if it would hurt less. Like he was easing into him, and it would be easier on him. In reality, it was probably like ripping off a Band-Aid. Jack wouldn't know.  
Ralph sobs and leans into him when he pulls away and licks at the trickle of blood to assess the damage. If it was too bad, if he went too deep, he'd pull back. There's an imprint of the rest of his teeth, slight crescents surrounding the six circles of welling blood.

'Fuck,' He whispers weakly, and Jack grips at his arms, hard enough to bruise.

'You good?' Jack murmurs, moving back to wipe at the blood with his sleeve, bloodlust weighing heavy in his stomach. Ralph nods, resting his temple on his shoulder to look to his neck. Jack leans over and pulls him up, bracing one arm up under his shoulder and the other across the small of his back. Ralph grabs at his arm as he sucks at the blood, drawing it into his mouth.  
He gets greedy, lurching over him, but Ralph doesn't seem to mind, grinding down on his thigh at a quick, uneven pace, making sure to press his own thigh to the crotch of his jeans.  


He doesn't know how much blood he takes - or does Ralph give it to him? - but Ralph pulls away when he climaxes to throw his head back and cry out, crushing at his upper arms. Jack lets him, grinds up into him to ride him down, and get himself to where he was, too. He hadn't been focused on pleasuring either of them - it was just collateral damage for taking his fill. His chest is heaving and Ralph's blood is spread thick over his mouth, chin, and cheeks, dripping down to his neck and shirt. He was always a messy eater, even in the best of time, and he wore white today, too.  
Ralph falls back against him, leaning on his other shoulder so the bite and blood-slicked skin is facing away from him. Jack presses his messy face into his hair, not caring that it makes an even bigger mess. He kisses his temple.

'Alright, Ralph?' He manages, and Ralph nods weakly, shaking as he comes down from the high.

'Did you come?' Jack shakes his head, and Ralph nods. 'Here,' He pulls his shirt over his head and Jack looks over the damage he's done - his blood trickles down to his collarbone in a ridiculously stereotypical way. Where he held onto his shoulder, there are scratches that have little spots of blood welling in some places, and where he held onto his back, there's a long bruise forming. He hadn't noticed he was being so rough. Ralph winces as he helps him out of his own shirt, then uses it as a cloth to wipe at the blood on his face. Jack wrinkles his nose as he watches the white cotton stain a dark red.  
The blond climbs stiffly from his lap to kneel between his feet, pulling him from his jeans quickly, efficiently, and takes him into his mouth. He does it in just the right way, the way that he knows will get him to come the quickest, and Jack smiles, pushing his hair from his face, biting back his moans.

 

It doesn't take Ralph long to bring him over the edge, pulling away when he does, so Jack spills onto his jeans. Ralph sits back on his heels and looks up at him, wiping his mouth.

'We've made quite the mess, haven't we?'


	24. XIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a request for an anon!!! on me tumbles!!! for jack bein on the bottom!!! ask and u shall receive  
> (if u compliment me i drop everything to do ur request bc im a narcissistic hoe and i need my ego to be fed and nurtured like a newborn baby that is roughly the size of texas)
> 
> itzzzzz birthday sex bc my birthday month starts next week sO im gettin in the spirit

Jack wakes up to Ralph straddling his waist. It's not an unfamiliar sight, and it isn't an unwelcome one, either.

'Mornin'.' Ralph bites his lip and presses his wrists to the pillow by his head.

'Good morning,' He leans down and mouths at Jack's jaw, 'Happy birthday.' Jack laughs and presses his cheek into his hair.

'This my present?' He reaches back to grasp at his rear, and Ralph hums, pressing back into his hands.

'Could be. Or... I could do something for you.' Jack's thoughts immediately go to his mouth, and he hums, nibbling at the shell of Ralph's ear.

'Really? Like what?'

'I know you aren't the biggest fan of it, but what if I was on top this morning? Let me do something for you. It's your day.'

'When I think of birthday sex, I think more on the lines of keeping you in bed all day and making you come over and over until you can't stand it.'

'We can still do that. Just... I don't want it to be about me today. You always make it about me, baby. And I love that, I do, but... You deserve some pampering too, love.' Jack pulls back to look at his face, considering it.

'Hm. Maybe. You did forget the magic word.' Ralph laughs and pulls him closer again, kissing his hair.

'Please. Please, baby, please.' Jack bites his lip and presses his cheek to Ralph's.

'Okay.'

 

Ralph doesn't let him help take off their clothes. Every time Jack sits up, he pushes him back down and gives him a serious look, then sitting back to remove his pajama pants, or his shirt, or his briefs.

'Back or stomach?' He asks, and Jack snorts. Like he even needed to ask.

'Back. I need to see you.'

'Of course.' Ralph pushes all of the covers down to the foot of the bed and leans over to get the lube out. Jack angles his hips up as Ralph coats his fingers in lube, leaning down as he presses one finger into him slowly. The inhale of breath that Jack takes in is sharp, and Ralph stills until he breathes out, then slowly crooks his finger to press the knuckle up against him, making Jack curse.

Jack takes another deep breath as Ralph eases another finger in to join his index finger, and makes a small, barely noticeable scissoring motion with the two fingers. Jack lurches up into him, gripping his shoulder as he curses again. 'Colour?'

'Green,' Ralph pulls both fingers out and Jack's hips lift immediately to chase after the loss as a quiet whine leaves him, 'What the fuck, Ralph? Green, I said fucking gr- oh.' Jack moans and shudders under him when Ralph eases all three of his lubed fingers into him. The blond smiles and kisses his temple.

'God, baby, you take it so well. You're doing so well. I love you so,' Ralph pulls his fingers out until only the tip of his middle finger is past the tight ring of muscle, 'fucking,' and eases back in, 'much.' Jack pulls him down flush to his front, pressing his face to his neck. The shorter boy pushes his fingers through his hair and cradles his head as he works his fingers into him at an even pace, murmuring praise.

When Jack is as relaxed as he'll ever get, Ralph pulls his hand away and spreads a good amount of lube over his length. He kisses along Jack's face, soft and careful, and pushes his curls from his face.

'You ready?' Jack nods and presses his hips up as Ralph slowly pushes in, gripping onto his arm as he lets out a shaky sigh and leans his cheek into Jack's hair. Once he's all the way in, he holds still, letting Jack shift and get used to this intrusion. After a minute, Jack leans back and kisses his jaw, sliding his fingers along his cheek.

'Fuck me, sweet boy.' He whispers, and Ralph shivers, then slowly starts moving in him, holding onto him tightly, pushing his face into his hair, already quivering. Jack hums and closes his eyes, going lax under him as he strokes Ralph's cheek lazily, thoughtlessly. 'Faster.' He murmurs quietly, and Ralph swallows and tugs away, touching his cheek.

'You sure?' Jack's breath hitches as he lies back, settling back onto the pillows. 

'Yes,' He breathes, and Ralph sits back to watch his face, biting his lip and smiling softly. He presses his hips up and forward, and Jack grabs his arm, nails pressing into his skin as he does it again, falling forward onto his forearms to kiss his forehead, cupping his 

'I love you,' He whispers again and again, each roll of his hips timed with _love_. Jack murmurs it back each time, mouthing at his shoulder.  
Ralph's words slur together with desperation and arousal as he starts moving faster, reaching down to grab at his ribs to steady himself. Jack stops saying it back, and kisses along his collarbone, murmuring praise into his flesh.

 

Ralph does a full stop, quivering as he pushes his forehead to Jack's, breathing heavy.

'What's goin' on, sweet boy?' Jack's own breathing is bordering on labored, 'You close? You gonna come?' Ralph nods, grabbing for both of his hands and kissing him, long and sweet and surprisingly chaste for their current situation. He moans into the kiss as he comes, a long and low sound that comes out hoarse and peters out into a whimper as he falls against Jack, kissing him again and again.

Once he's recovered, Ralph rolls off him and catches his breath. He lifts onto his elbow and notices Jack's own erection, and bites his lip.

'Want me to take care of that?' Jack hums, thinking that maybe he would use his mouth and do what he was so excellent at.

'Sure.' He doesn't - he wraps his hand around the shaft and strokes him lazily, pressing soft kisses to his chest. It still feels incredible, and Jack can't complain about the closeness of Ralph's face.

'Happy birthday.' He murmurs again, kissing his cheekbone as he swipes his thumb over the head. Jack barely acknowledges it, letting his eyes closed. Ralph hums and quickens the movement of his arm, making sure to press his thumb to the head with every other pump.  
It doesn't take long for him to take him apart with his hand, and Jack is moaning his name as he spills onto his stomach. Ralph takes his face in his hands and kisses him again, then pushes their foreheads together as he settles, half on his chest, half on the mattress.

'Thank you for letting me do that,' He murmurs after a long silence, and Jack hums, laying his hands over his, 'We can rest for a bit, then you can fuck me, if you'd like. I'd be pretty useless, but you know,' Jack glances down at him and laughs, tiredly, kissing his temple.

'I'm just about fucked out for now, thanks.'


	25. XX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (this is a joke fic)

john mountaindew is a SAVAGE LMAO (100 emoji) nd he was like

'yo @ ralph dtf' ralph is like lol sure

 

so jacky boy is like

'lmao hoddup i need u to put the stinky shell down' nd ralph is like

'ya but ur still holding ur stick wtf dudio' so they put down their stick and the stinky shell nd they into the forest to fucc

 

so like jack like whips off his fuckign emo ass cloak and is like

'lets do this lol' nd ralph is like *hair flip*

'okay lmao' so jacky boy whips out his 12 INCH POLE nd ralph gives him the succ

they nutt

 

'lmao ok ralph go b hot nd bad at hunting somewhere else for now bc im too busy being ugly and AWESOME at hunting and gay with my hunters to b serious wit u' ralph frown ed but was like

'lol ok we jus fucc buddies imma go hang wit my bf simon bye bitch lmao' he saunters sexily into the forest nd jack is like

'fucc that was hot'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this within the time frame of one episode of brooklyn 99  
> its a v important fic nd its 4 the most important person in the world


	26. XXI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Jack was burning, burning, burning, and he was hellbent on getting Ralph to burn with him._
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>    
> the consent in this is VERY dubious and??? you probably don't wanna fuck with this anyways tbh

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i made a lot of comparisons to fire but w/e i still like this

Jack always came to Ralph at night, hidden in stars and never in paint.

It was part of their unspoken agreement - if he wanted to continue this silly little game of Cat-and-Mouse, he'd come in the day, with his hunters and his stick with both ends sharpened, face smudged with clay and soot from the fire. Like he never washed it this entire month that Ralph had been alone on this godforsaken island. If he wanted to talk, wanted to... Do other things, he would come alone, and Ralph would come out from where he hid, help him wipe the paint from his face. He would never tell him where he hid, never show him that spot he found where the greenery was just starting to get thick again.

He knew that Jack Merridew and The Chief would never be completely separate people.

 

The redhead hisses his name now, his paint rubbed off in long, fading streaks. His hair is set on fire by the setting sun. Ralph surveys the treeline behind him - although he had no visible weapons, it still wasn't dark. He never really knew who he was getting when Jack came to him.

'Ralph. Please.' His voice is vulnerable, pleading - he sounds his age. Barely a teenager. Ralph sighs. Jack would be able to see him come up from where he currently was, pressed behind an outcrop of rock up on the mountain. The Beast even managed to scare away Jack's flames, that day. That was good enough for Ralph, when the smoke was choking him and his tears were angry, angry, angry, stinging his eyes and his feet and hands were raw and screaming from running through a burning jungle.

'I need to see you. Please.' He says again, and Ralph presses further into the rock. Some nights, when he didn't feel like being pressed against something being pushed into so violently, so harshly, he would ignore Jack's calls and Jack would grow tired, return to his log and his fire and his pigs, leave Ralph well enough alone until he grew bored again. Today was not one of those nights - he was growing impatient, Ralph could hear it in his tone. And not the good kind. There was still light, and the mountain offered no real protection from The Chief and his hunters. 'Ralph.'

'Here.' He calls, raising his hand. He doesn't bother moving. The sigh of relief could be heard from this distance. Jack clambers over the rock and stands over him.

'Why didn't you answer before now?'

'I grow tired of these games, Jack.' He sighs, and Jack rolls his eyes, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

'Then stop playing. You know what you need to do.' After their nights together, when the sun was rising and the boys would start looking for their missing Chief, Jack would turn to him and say the same thing each time. _Come back with me._ Ralph would smile from where he sat among the little ferns poking through the ashes. His answer was always unchanging. _You will not be victorious in this game, Merridew._

'You know what I mean. Just - let me go. Haven't you done enough?' Even to his own ears, Ralph sounds miserable. He's tired. Tired of running, tired of hiding. Tired of Jack's too-rough hands and too-hard words.

'I can't do that, and you know it,' Jack has dropped to his knees and he grabs his wrists, hard enough to bruise, 'You're intoxicating, Ralph. You're just as bad for me as I am for you, you know.' Ralph wrenches away and stands, climbing down the mountain. Jack is close on his tail.

'Call your dogs off and let me rot here alone.'

'I can't do that.' He repeats, grabbing his arm to make him look at him. He pushes him against a tree that is relatively unscathed, grabbing his face. 'I can't leave you alone. And even if I could, I wouldn't want to. You know why?' Ralph looks away from his face - Jack could make a smile look terrifying. And he wasn't smiling. He stares over his shoulder.

'Why?' He asks, tone blank. Jack presses him harder to the trunk, fingers tightening on his jaw.

'I intend to make you mine, that's why. I want you to come back with me to Castle Rock - forget this wallowing, Ralph. You would flourish, on my side. These ashes dull you.'

'If it keeps you away, I'll gladly let them.' Ralph pushes at him, but Jack is unmoving.

'Remember that night? By the fire? Our dance?'

'I wish I could forget.'

'You were beautiful then. It haunts my dreams. You haunt my dreams.' Ralph thinks of other things Jack had told him about the island. We shan't dream. Jack's hand shifts to his throat, squeezing, and there's a fleeting moment of panic - just like every other time. This was how it always started. Jack would back him into a corner, grab at him too harshly, leave bruises that would linger for days. He'd grasp his throat until Ralph started to think that this is how he would die. Under the hand of a boy who was willing to kill and maim and destroy to get his way. Then the next few minutes were a blur of teeth and nails and too rough, too rough, too rough, and then Jack would pull away, beg him to come back with him, that wildfire look still lingering in his eyes.

Jack was burning, burning, burning, and he was hellbent on getting Ralph to burn with him.

Some days, he felt like just giving in and letting himself become tinder.

'Come back with me. No one will hurt you.' Jack never spoke during this bit, the part when he got his pulse racing and his nails digging into his wrist. It threw Ralph off, and for the first time, he wants to. 'I swear it.'

'You won't... No.' He swallows thickly - or as best he can, with Jack's hand clamped like a slowly tightening vice over his windpipe - and Jack must sense his shift in resolve.

'Come on, Ralph. I know you want you - you don't have to worry about fires and conches and Piggy anymore. You don't have to worry about anything. Let go.' His voice is soft, and his hand slides down to his side. Ralph's lashes flutter shut, and he can hear the victorious smile in Jack's voice as he continues. 'No one is coming for us. You must know that - this whole island was burning for days on end. The smoke was thick - if anyone cared, we would be far away by now. A rescue signal doesn't matter anymore. Nothing has to matter to you anymore. Just let it.' Ralph shivers as his lips brush over his pulse - he is flint, and Jack must have figured out by now that all he needed to do was strike a spark, and Ralph would be done for.

'I...' Ralph had a protest, he's sure of it. But any words, any thoughts have turned to ash in his mouth as Jack mouths at his throat, hand working down his torso and between his thighs. Jack was never this gentle - this was all slow burning, candlelight and low, controlled blazes in a fireplace. Jack was not controllled - Jack was a forest fire and a grease fire all rolled into one very dangerous boy.

But a slow burn is still a burn, and Ralph is on fire.

He opens his eyes and Jack is looking at him so expectantly. Maybe, they could learn to love. It would be a violent love, yes, and it would surely destroy Ralph by the end of it, but right now, Ralph is beyond caring.  
He wipes at a thick stroke of red paint that was covering Jack's freckles, then lets his resolve crumble.

He leans against him and lets himself come undone under Jack's uncharacteristically gentle touch, lets Jack build him back up, kissing his temples. They never kiss, either.

When Jack finishes, rutting against Ralph's thigh with slow thrusts, he leans against him, quivering.

'Come back with me.' Jack whispers a final time, and Ralph closes his eyes, pushes his cheek to Jack's shoulder.

'Okay.'

 

He lets Jack paint his face with careful strokes of thick, heavy clay and soot. Under his mask of paint, Ralph throws himself into the blaze of Jack's attention.

He relishes the burn.


	27. XXII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _rejoice, rejoice, and fall to your knees_  
>   
> 
>    
> if you're uncomfortable with the fetishization of religion/religious imagery or religion in general, click away please ❤  
> other warnings are : internalized homophobia (briefly mentioned in the beginning) christian/catholic guilt (also mentioned in the beginning - is this a warning???) and A LOT of idolization of another person (again is this a warning??? who knows)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> u could make a religion out of this!  
> (no don't)

Usually, the knowledge of being in this sort of relationship would've made Jack sick with guilt. It does, sometimes, the knowledge of what he and Ralph do when it's dark and he can pretend that God wasn't omnipresent. It claws at him now, that incessant guilt, as he sits as far as he can from Ralph on the sofa without raising suspicion.

Ralph glances over at him and smiles at him, reaching across and stroking his cheek with his index finger. Jack grips his cross until the gold pendant cuts in his hand, and swallows. The blond slides closer and turns off the telly, so they were plunged into darkness. Jack's breath hitches when he runs his nose along his jaw, breath warm on his neck.

'Jack,' He whispers into the dark, and Jack shifts into him, 'Do you mind turning the lamp on?' When Jack doesn't move, Ralph reaches across him - he can feel his arm brush his nose - and then the room is filled with a soft glow from the lamp. He blinks and drops his gaze, the guilt immediately clenching in his stomach.

_This is wrong. This is dirty. You're dirty, you're unloved, God hates -_

Ralph smiles at him again, leaning into him.

'I love you.' He whispers, and Jack stops thinking about how he was raised, and starts thinking about how he could be conditioned.  
Did he really need God's love when Ralph was right in front of him, bone and blood and flesh? Ralph would love him for who he was. Jack reaches for him, clasping at his forearm, and Ralph smiles again. That smile makes him want to kneel at his feet and rejoice.

So he does.

Ralph looks at him in surprise as he slides off the couch and settles on his knees. Jack still can't quite meet his eye, face aflame as he kisses along the tops of his thighs, the warmth of his flesh muffled by the jeans he wears. Ralph still hums and leans his head back, his throat flushed a prettier pink than any God could bestow. Jack whispers his name over and over, and the sound of the consonants and vowel rolling into one syllable sounds holier than the Lord's Prayer could ever sound. Ralph slides his fingers through his hair, making him shudder, and he tugs him up into a soft, lazy kiss. Jack melts into it, into him, sighing into his mouth.

He pulls back to kneel again, intent to worship him for the Saint he saw him as. No - scratch that. Ralph was no saint. Even God didn't shine a light to him. Whatever he was, he was holy. And that was all that mattered.

 

Jack gets those blasted jeans off of Ralph, and his briefs as well. Ralph shudders when he kisses the inside of his thigh, slinging his arm over his face.

'I need to see your face. Please.' Jack whispers into his skin, and Ralph lets out a shaky breath, taking both of his hands in his and gripping tightly. Jack hums when he does, and adjusts himself to kiss his stomach. Ralph whimpers his name, and Jack shivers - it was astonishing how they could have similar feelings for each other, especially since Jack has done nothing to deserve someone like Ralph. Someone so kind, so loving.  
(Fuck God - cruel and cold - this boy was the one who he needed. Who he would praise.)

'Jack,' Ralph whispers, voice softer than anything Jack had ever heard, sweeter than anything he's ever heard, 'please.'  
He doesn't tease him, doesn't hesitate to take him into his mouth and hollow his cheeks around him like he knows he likes. Ralph cries out as soon as he does, lurching forward and grabbing at his hair. He curses loudly and presses up into his mouth, biting down, harsh on his bottom lip. Jack bobs his head as best he can with Ralph holding him like he is, forearms braced on his head, nails biting at his scalp.

'Please, please, please,' Ralph chants, breath shaky and voice quavering, 'Don't stop, please don't - ' It ends in a shrill cry as he comes, heavy on Jack's tongue. Jack pulls back and swallows his mouthful, trying not to screw up his face. Ralph could spit blood in his face and he would thank him. He kisses his hipbones and runs his hands up his ribs, tracing the pads of his fingers over the ridges of his ribs. The blond's fingers curl around his biceps and tug at him gently, making a small noise in the back of his throat.

Jack straightens up and cards his fingers through Ralph's hair, leaning up to mouth along his jaw. Ralph makes a strangled noise and buries his fingers in his curls, holding him against his throat.

'I need you.' He whispers, and Jack nods.

'I know. I need you, too.' He had a feeling that they both meant different things.

 

Ralph is straddling his lap, gazing down at him lovingly as he rids him of his clothing, slow careful movement that make sure that the only parts of them touching was the soft skin of the inside of Ralph's thighs to Jack's hips. His fingers brush over his ribs once, and Jack shudders violently, so desperate for more contact.

'Touch me some more,' He whimpers as he pitches forward to push his face into his chest, and Ralph stops to cradle his head, kissing his hair, rolling his hips down against him gently.

'I love you,' He whispers to him, and Jack nods again, drawing him closer, almost clawing at his skin with desperation. Ralph doesn't flinch, 'I love you, Jack, I love you so much. You're my fucking world.' He scoots closer, careful fingers sliding down his back, over his spine, and Jack shudders again. 'Alright, Jack?' He whispers, seeking permission to keep going.

'Yes,' He breathes, but doesn't pull away. It takes Ralph some adjustment, but he manages to get Jack's trousers and briefs off, keeping one hand on the back of his neck for almost the whole time. When they're both naked, Ralph murmurs his name, and Jack is distracted from how nice he sounds to actually answer.

'Jack, I need the lube.' He whispers, gently pushing him away to climb off his lap. Jack chews his nails nervously, the guilt threatening to crash back over him as he watches Ralph's back until he disappears into the bedroom.  
When he returns, Ralph smiles softly, pressing the bottle into his hand and climbing on top of him again, pushing his fingers through his hair. With that smile, all guilt and hesitation melts away and Jack is utterly and completely sure that this was who he was meant to be. This was who he was meant to love.

'Is this good?' Ralph's gentle whisper snaps him out of his thoughts. His eyes dart to his and he swallows thickly. 'Is this okay? I don't have to ride you.'

'Um,' Jack's words stick in his mouth, 'Whatever you want.'

'What I want is for you to get what you want, too.' Jack swallows and nods.

'I just want you. I just want you to be here, to be happy.'

'You have me. You have me, and that makes me happy.' Jack nods again, pressing his forehead to his shoulder as Ralph lifts himself up onto his knees to prepare himself.

'Are you set on being on top?'

'No. Do you want to?' Jack swallows and drops his gaze, then grips Ralph's hips to manuever him to lie across the couch. He takes the lube back and warms some between his fingers. Ralph moans as he slides two into him slowly, carefully.  
Jack would be content with just this, getting to be this close to Ralph, this intimate with him. But Ralph tugs at his hips and whines, pressing at his back.

'Need you. Need to make you feel good.'

'You are. I feel amazing. So good.' Jack pulls his hand away anyways, spreading more lube over his length, kissing the hollow of his throat. Ralph locks his feet around his waist and holds him close, grabbing at his shoulders. As he slides in, Ralph cries out, throwing his head back against the arm of the sofa. Jack groans quietly, drawing him up against him with one arm, kissing along his jaw. Jack gets his other hand between them to stroke his cock, long and gentle and dragging over the sensitive skin. Ralph sobs and pitches up into him.

'Roll over. I know you wanted to -' Ralph doesn't even finish his sentence when they've almost rolled off the couch. Jack curses and shifts back onto the couch, sitting up with his leg splayed over the edge of the couch. Ralph takes his face in his hands, holding him there as he studies his eyes, moving back on him slowly.

 

Minutes tick by, and Ralph grows tired of the slow, even movements that Jack craved. He falls against him and quickens the pace, kissing his forehead. Jack holds onto his hips, letting him grind down on his hip to get himself where he needed to be. Ralph doesn't seem to notice the loss of his hand, whispering sweet nonsense against his temple, interlaced with breathless moans and quiet sobs. Jack leans forward to kiss his shoulder, whispering his name into his skin, over and over as his hands roam across the span of flesh between his shoulder blades.

'Are you close?' Ralph whispers, 'Cause I am. I wanna come with you.'

'Slower, go slower.' It seems to take a great effort, but Ralph slows down into that slow drag of his hips, and Jack holds him steady. 'See? Much better, yes?' Ralph nods, almost silent now. He whispers praise against the blond's shoulder, hands running over his spine as his praise melts into random compliments about him that Jack thinks of as he breathes in the smell of sex and sweat and Ralph in general.

As they near their climaxes, Ralph's breath hitches and his moans become shriller, just like they always do. Hurriedly, Jack takes his cock in his hand, stroking him over the edge as he whispers his name into his shoulder, over and over like a prayer. Ralph leans into him, answering with a repeated mantra of his own, various words that all blend together as he spills into Jack's hand. Jack's release comes soon after, and Ralph pulls him into a long kiss, letting him cry out into his mouth as he spills into him.

 

They lie tangled on the couch in the fading afterglow, and Jack traces his fingers over the moles on Ralph's neck, shoulders and back, craning his neck to kiss each mole that he can reach. With each kiss, he says a silent thanks for him. He isn't sure who he's thanking anymore, but he doesn't care, either.


	28. XXIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> doin a request for an anon on my tumblr who wanted roger to watch jack nd ralph fuckin.  
> i went a little further than that but w/e
> 
> idk man i jus think that ralph would have a lil bit of a thing for bein watched dont mind me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> theres no plot like it literally starts with the sex jus let me live

Jack is already buried in Ralph, face in his neck, when the door swings open. Jack is facing the door and looks up calmly, hand pressing to Ralph's back before he can look around, pushing his nose into his shoulder. Someone curses behind them, and Jack smiles into his skin.

'Shit - I should've knocked... I'll come back. Later.' It's Roger, Ralph can tell from the rare occasion in which he's heard him speak. Jack lifts his chin and pulls Ralph closer to his chest, not bothering to stop moving into him lazily.

'No. Close the door - and lock it, while you're at it.' Ralph pulls back to look at Jack's face, drawing his brows together. The door clicks softly and the lock slides slowly and begrudgingly into place. Jack motions behind Ralph's back - he can feel the brush of his hand on his spine. 'What is it?'

'Um - I just, had a question. About tomorrow.'

'What is it?' Jack sounds bored, and Ralph twists around to watch Roger fiddle with the hem of his shirt. He bites his lip and leans in to kiss Jack's ear.

'He's getting hard.' He whispers, watching Jack's eyes flick down to his friend's groin, his lazy smile turning predatory. Roger looks like he's about to ask whatever question was so pressing as to barge in like he did, but Jack interrupts again.

'Don't you think Ralph is so pretty, Roger?' Ralph leans his head on Jack's shoulder and meets Roger's eyes, smiling softly. The other boy's eyes go round and he swallows.

'Um. Yes, Chief.' Jack hums, resting his hand on Ralph's hip.

'You wanna fuck him?' Roger makes a strangled noise, and Jack continues before he can answer, 'Of course, you never will. He'd probably never let you, even if I did. Right, pretty boy?' Ralph nods, never looking away from the other boy.

'You can touch me, if you'd like.' He says, just loud enough for Roger to hear. Jack tightens his hold on his hip and presses further into him. Roger swallows again, moving closer. He touches Ralph's back, tracing his fingers over the muscles carefully. Roger isn't looking at him - he's watching Jack, maybe he's staring him down. Ralph knows that Jack would pound into him later, leave bruises on his hips and hickeys on his neck, but Ralph would beg him for it. Thank him for it, when he's done. And Roger's hands are softer than Jack's, and a change is always welcome. He wraps his arms around Jack's neck and leans back into the touch. Jack's fingers are digging into his hip now, and he thrusts up into him quicker, harder, making him moan. Roger slides his fingers into his hair, tugging at the golden strands. Ralph leans his head back to look at him, wetting his lips.

'Kiss me.' He whispers, only for Roger now, and Jack grunts as Roger does as he's told, leaning over him to kiss him, quick and chaste. Jack grabs at Ralph and pulls him away, kissing him roughly. He kisses his temple, grabbing at his arm.

'You're really testing your boundaries, pretty boy.' He all but growls, and Ralph hums, lifting onto his knees so Jack can move into him easier. Jack looks back to Roger and swallows thickly, pressing his cheek to Ralph's hair, 'You want him to join today?' He whispers, and Ralph nods.

'Just once.'

'Just once,' He agrees, nodding, 'Take off your clothes, Roger.' He says, bored tone returning. Ralph doesn't look at him, but he can hear the rustling of clothes and the sound of a belt being removed, a fly being slid down. Roger shifts closer, touching Ralph's waist, and he finally looks at him, then looking down at his length, humming. He reaches back to wrap his hand around his shaft, stroking it slowly as he looks back to him, smiling. He braces the back of his neck and pulls him in, bites at his bottom lip. Jack groans, sounding more involuntary than anything, bending over to kiss his chest.

'Why is this so hot?' He whispers, pressing up into him. Jack kisses his chest again and moves faster, mouthing along his collarbone. Ralph hums into Roger's lips and smiles, tugging him closer.

'It's hot 'cause you love me.' He murmurs into the kiss, and Jack laughs against his skin, hoarse and quiet.

'Come closer. You're too far.' Jack whispers, and both boys move closer to him. Ralph breaks the kiss to look back at Jack, smiling softly.

'You close?' He whispers, rolling his hips down onto him. Jack shrugs and reaches for his hand, kisses his fingers. Ralph hums, swiping his thumb over the head of Roger's cock. 'If you come before Roger does I'll let you suck me off.' Jack grins and tugs him away from Roger, kissing his neck, moving faster.

'Moan for me, pretty boy. I need to hear those pretty sounds of yours.' Ralph bends his neck and kisses the top of his ear, moaning against it. Jack groans back, sucking a mark into his neck as he bucks up into him. Ralph moans again, for real this time, and adjusts himself so he can kiss Jack's ear and still touch Roger. Roger is silent, as always, but his breathing is heavy and his fingers are tight over his waist as he kisses along his shoulder. It's the closest he's been to Jack this whole time, with only him between them, but they still don't quite acknowledge that the other is there. Baby steps, Ralph supposed. If they ever did this again. He hopes that they do - he likes the attention of two instead of one, both on him.

Jack shifts under him to get more leverage, holding him steady when Ralph leans back into Roger, reaching back to sling his arm across the back of his neck, pulling him down into another kiss. Jack's fingers trace over his jaw, feeling it work as he presses his tongue into the darker boy's mouth. His arm drops back down to his lap, stroking his cock with interest, twisting half into him. Jack tugs his hips closer, always greedy, always eager for more. Ralph lets him take what he wants, lets them both lean into him, mouths on him, hands on him. The blonde moans into the kiss as Jack brushes his hand over his length, but pushes his hand away.

'First you need to come.' He murmurs after pulling away from Roger to look at Jack. Jack sighs.

'This angle isn't good. I need something else.'

'Then find something else. Take what you need.' Jack pulls out, and Ralph can't help but whine at the loss. Someone's fingers press into him - it must be Roger, since Jack's hands are on his face.

'I need you, pretty boy. All of you.'

'Sharing is caring.' He whispers back in a teasing tone, 'You can have me any other day of the week.' Jack kisses him, leaning into it as his hands drop. He groans into the kiss, and Ralph pulls away to look between them, watching him jerk himself off. Jack's forehead falls to his shoulder as he whispers his name. Ralph hums and kisses his temple. He's practically in Roger's lap now, the other two boys' legs tangled together as he perches on both their thighs. Three of Roger's fingers fill him, and he's still silently bucking into his hand. A loud moan directs Ralph's attention to Jack as he spills onto his stomach, moaning his name. Ralph kisses his temple, whispers praise into his hair as he catches his breath.

Ralph turns back to Roger, pushes his hair from his face to meet his gaze, speeding up his movements. He breaks his silence to let out a shuddering moan, and Ralph kisses his jaw, nuzzling into his neck, whispering encouragement as Roger presses his hips up into his hand, bucks into his palm sloppily, fingers tight over his arms. Jack has caught his breath and seems to be comfortable enough to actually acknowledge the other boy; he leans over Ralph to murmur dirty things, seeming to be meant for both of them. Ralph feels Roger's jaw press to his hair, knows he's looking to Jack now.

'Can I come, Chief? Is it okay?' Jack laughs softly, and Ralph sits up to watch him press his forehead to Roger's and nod. It throws him - he had never seen him be so gentle with anyone but him. But he doesn't have time to dwell on it, for Roger spills over his hand, thick and heavy, moaning quietly. Ralph hums and strokes him down from the high, then sucks his fingers clean. It makes both boys shiver.

'You haven't come yet, sweet boy.' Jack whispers, kissing his jaw. Ralph hums, leaning into the kiss. He expects that he would be taken care of like the other two, but Jack lifts him from his legs so he's fully in Roger's lap and drops to his knees by the bed. Roger has to stop spreading him open on his fingers to hold him still, one arm braced across his upper chest, and Ralph whines at the loss, lifting his hips towards Jack, who smiles and replaces Roger's fingers with his own.

'Don't you worry, baby boy. We'll take care of you.' Ralph nods numbly and leans against Roger's chest, shifting to find a comfortable fit. As Jack leaves lazy kisses along his length, fingers working in him slowly, like he knows he likes it, Roger rubs his thumb along his collarbone and kisses the side of his face, watching Jack in silence.

'You ever seen him on his knees?' Ralph whispers, already breathless. Jack pretends like he doesn't hear as Roger shakes his head.

'No. You're special, I think,' He lowers his voice even more and murmurs into Ralph's ear, 'If he ever lets this happen again, I think I'd like to see you on your knees. My come on that pretty face of yours.' Ralph's face is on fire, and Jack notices, sitting back to frown up at them. He looks like he's about to say something when Ralph bites the corner of his lip and whines, rolling his hips.

'Daddy,' He knew it was cruel to use that, especially when Jack's pupils blow and he leans back in, 'I thought you were gonna take care of me.'

'I am, baby boy. I am.' His voice goes hoarse and grating, fingers hooking up in him. Ralph moans and writhes in Roger's lap, and Jack uses that distraction to take his cock in his mouth and hollow his cheeks around him. Roger holds him steady and smiles against his ear.

'Now that's a pretty sight,' Jack's eyes flick from Ralph's face to Roger's, 'Your cock in his mouth makes Merridew easy on the eyes. Imagine that.' Ralph moans and presses his cheek to Roger's hand, nodding. Jack meets his gaze again, his free hand grabbing for his. Ralph takes it greatfully, gripping his hand tightly, moaning his name when Jack bobs his head, smiling around him.

When he presses the flat of his tongue to the underside of his cock, Ralph throws his head back to Roger's shoulder, shuddering.

'Jesus  _fuck_ , I'm close,' He manages, and Jack hums, hollowing his cheeks around him again, moving his fingers quicker. Ralph's nails dig into his hand, into Roger's arm as he comes with a moan, going limp as he shudders. Jack hums and pulls away, kissing his hipbone before climbing up onto the bed. Roger lets go of him and lets Jack lie back and pull Ralph against him. He watches them for a moment, then moves to collect his clothes. Ralph feels an inexplainable panic flare in his chest, replacing the satisfied contentment, and he reaches for the other boy.

'No - stay.' Roger straightens up and looks to Jack, asking permission. Whatever he sees in Jack's face makes him swallow and climb onto the bed, lying down on Ralph's other side. Ralph looks to him, touching his cheek. 'Sleep with us?' Roger hesitates, then nods slowly, and Ralph turns onto his side to face him, and Jack follows suit, pulling the thick blanket over all of them.

They fall asleep not completely knowing where each of them ends and another begins.


	29. XXIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thanks @ a-deliciouslyfading for requesting this! some jalph soulmate au for y'all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> y'all knew i was gonna pull this shit eventually

Jack Merridew had a long time to get used to the fact that he would never see in color.

He had seventeen years to get used to the comments about the difference between old movies and new movies from people in love who forget that not everyone was as fortunate.  
He got used to it, because who could love someone like him?

 

His classmates never talked about it - he could could the number of people his age who found their soulmate on one hand. He knows that people he knew personally would never make it onto that list.

He has been told that everyone had someone out there for them. Some just took longer to find them. Some just lose them before they find them. Maybe that was the case for him - his soulmate got SIDS at five months old or some bullshit like that. Or maybe people like him just weren't made to love.

Not that it bothers him or anything.

Strike that earlier thought - his classmates rarely talked about it. But sometimes a girl would come into his homeroom and rush to her friends, whisper something excitedly to them, then they would all stand and cry out with excitement, hugging the girl in question, ask her a flurry of questions - _what's green like? What color is my hair?_ The poor girl never had answers, for how could you describe color?

Strike that last thought, too. Maybe it bothered him sometimes.

 

-xXx-

 

He first noticed Ralph in seventh grade. They had been going to the same school since kindergarten, but he never thought to look twice at the boy before then. Until someone - he can't remember who - said something about how cute he was, especially for a seventh grader. Maybe a girl in their class or something. Then he would cast a lingering glance at his profile, wonder what color his eyes were. Things like that.

Ralph just got better looking with age. Sure, he had an awkward phase in eighth grade, back when he lost his baby fat but didn't gain the muscle yet. But after the summer that year, he comes to high school filled out of his lanky arms and too thin torso, gaining muscle and confidence. Girls wouldn't stop staring at him, deliberately brushing him in the hall in hopes that maybe, just maybe. Sure, Jack stared at him, but he was never that pathetic. He probably found his soulmate by now anyways.

  
Early Monday morning, the teacher asks Ralph hand out papers to the class class. He does it, looking bored. Jack holds out his hand for one when he gets to his row, never looking up from his phone.

It happens suddenly, their fingers brushing together. There's no shock, like there is in the books. No physical feeling. But Jack blinks, and suddenly he can see in perfect color, and he can't breathe. It's overwhelming. The papers hit the floor and Ralph stumbles back, like he felt the supposed shock. He cradles his hand to his chest, staring Jack down, mouth agape. Out of all these new colors, Jack thinks that the dozens that make up Ralph are the prettiest. Especially the light color dusting his cheeks. He wonders if it's like that all the time - he hopes it is. Ralph swallows, swaying in place for a moment, then looks down.

'Um. Sorry. I... Fingers slipped.' He mumbles as he stoops, gathering the papers. People are whispering all around them, and Jack stares determinedly at his desk, face burning. Ralph steps around him, keeping a healthy distance away from him, but even at this distance, Jack is acutely aware of his presence. He wonders if that's a side effect of this whole apparent soulmates thing. The teacher slowly continues his lesson, and Jack closes his eyes. All of these colors hurt his eyes.

 

He stares at the end of his lit cigarette, watching it burn orange than fade to black, then flare orange again when he take some a drag. He had looked up a color chart on his phone, and was slowly trying to associate the colors with the names he's known his whole life, always just varying shades of grey before now.

'Jack?' He looks up at the end of the alley, where Ralph stands up, jacket wrapped around his frame. He's alone, which is as jarring as all these colors - those two friends of his were never far from his side. The blond - he looked that up, too - steps forward and stands over him, hands shoving into his pocket. Jack swallows and gives him a once over. Grey pants, light grey shirt. Probably best, since they couldn't see colors before now. He had read up on clashing colors earlier, too, and complementary colors, and all that bullshit.

'What do you want, Gornick?'

'I want to talk. About earlier.' He says it like it's the most obvious thing in the world, and, looking back, Jack supposed that it was. He sighs and scoots over on the step he's sitting on. Ralph sits beside him and stares straight ahead at the brick of the building. He hesitantly reaches out, taking Jack's hand. He lets him.

'So talk.' He whispers, voice hoarse. The feel of his thumb rubbing over his skin was too much. Ralph was too much. Or maybe it was just this day that was too much.

'Um. What are we supposed to do?'

'What people always do.' He says tiredly, looking to the blond. Ralph nods and squeezes his hand.

'How... How fast are we supposed to go with this?'

'I don't think there's a set rule. We don't even have to end up together.'

'Yeah, we'll just end up unhappy and alone for the rest of our lives.' Ralph laughs, and it's nicest sound Jack has ever heard. He decides that he doesn't want to not end up with this boy. The shorter boy moves closer so their thighs are touching, gripping his hand like he's the only thing keeping him from floating away. Jack hesitates, then squeezes back. A silence falls between them, then Ralph turns to him, slowly inching forward to press his face to his shoulder. 'I don't want to end up unhappy and alone.' He whispers into his shirt, and Jack swallows, nods and hums in agreement as he presses his nose to the top of his head.

'Me neither.'

 

-xXx-

 

It's been two weeks, and they still haven't kissed. Not properly, anyways. Which is ridiculous, considering they spend every waking minute with each other. Which is ridiculous, considering what they have done. They've kissed each other's temples and foreheads and fingertips before falling asleep tangled together. They've tasted the salt of each other's skin when they were alone, too nervous to go any further than quick yet desperate kisses to each other's throats and jaws. But they're too flighty to actually be close enough to each other to kiss. 

Until now.

Ralph has him in his bed, pressed into the soft sheets, hands on his face.

'Don't move.' He whispers, pushing their foreheads together. It's not like he would anyways - he's barely breathing. It's like a pet had fallen asleep on his chest and would wake up with the wrong move. But if he made the wrong move, Ralph would be at the other side of the room, adorably pink and flustered, and Jack would be able to do _nothing_. He swallows and meets his eyes. Ralph whispers it again, fingers sliding down his jaw, down his chest. Jack lets out a shuddering breath, and Ralph freezes for a beat, pressing his fingers to his neck. Then he continues moving, wetting his lips.

'Can I kiss you?' Jack doesn't hesitate to nod, and Ralph nods back, sitting back to tilt his chin up, pressing their lips together. Jack can't breathe, can't think of anything but Ralph's lips, yielding and soft under his. Ralph lets out a shuddering noise, grabbing at his hands, leaning into the kiss. Jack grabs at his hair and pulls him close, sitting up into him. Ralph opens his mouth, tilting his head and pressing himself into him. Jack hums into the kiss, closing his eyes. Ralph is the one who pulls back, gasping for breath. He falls into Jack, kissing along his jaw.

'Fuck.' Jack whispers, and Ralph laughs quietly, wrapping his arms around his shoulders.

'Yeah.' He murmurs.

'Fuck. Why did we wait so long to do that?'

'I don't know.'

' _Fuck_ ,' Jack falls back onto the pillows, slinging his arm over his face. Ralph rolls off him to settle on his side beside him, running his fingers over his chest. 'Could we do it again?' Ralph bites his lip and nods. Jack grins and rolls onto his side to pull Ralph close.

 

-xXx-

 

'I love you.' It's the first time either of them have said it, and _of course_ Ralph is the first one to say it. Jack frowns up at him from his place under him, grasping his hips. Ralph smiles at him, eyebrows high. 'What? I do!'

'Two things. First of all, of course you do. We're fucking soulmates. And secondly, I was supposed to say it first.' Ralph smiles down at him, placing his hands over his.

'You snooze, you lose.' It's such a juvenile thing to say that it throws Jack for a loop. He grins up at him, tugging him down, biting at his bottom lip until Ralph squeaks, then kisses it gently.

'Ass.' He murmurs, and Ralph hums, pulling his bottom lip into his mouth as he regards him with a serious expression.

'I love you.' He whispers back, taking his hands and kissing his fingertips. Jack doesn't push his smile back as Ralph leans down, nuzzling his nose along his jaw, pressing quick kisses to his skin. 'I love you. I love you so much. So much.' Jack hums, pushing his cheek into his hair.

'I love you.' He whispers into his hair, and the noise Ralph makes simultaneously breaks his heart and lifts it. The blond rolls his hips down against him, peppering his jaw with quick kisses as he whispers those three words over and over.

'Look at me.' Jack urges, pulling him away. Ralph leans his cheek into his hand and studies his face, smiling adoringly. 'I want you. All of you.'

'You have me.' Ralph closes both hands over one of his wrists, moving it down to his groin. Jack grasps the side of his neck and slowly presses the heel of his hand against him. Ralph whimpers, bending against him. Jack watches as he unravels himself in his hand, holding him as steady as he can with the one hand braced on his neck. When he comes undone, sobbing his name in a low, quivering moan, Jack is there to gather him into his arms and kiss him back together, talking in a soft voice against his ear as he rubs his back.

'I love you.' Ralph whispers again, hands still quivering, breathing still heavy. Jack doesn't hesitate to say it back.

 

-xXx-

 

It's dark in the room when Ralph sneaks in, awkwardly climbing through the open window and onto the bedside table. Jack laughs softly, helping him into his bed, kissing him. He tastes like summer - the way fresh cut grass smells, the sharpness of a chlorine pool. The tang of nicotine, which Jack is only a little remorseful in getting him hooked on.

Ralph giggles in the dark, the street lights outside giving enough light that Jack can see his teeth flash in the poor light as he straddles him. He smiles back and takes his hands, bringing him down to kiss him.

'Turn on your light.' Ralph whispers against his lips, and Jack hums, pulling him down.

'Can't. My mom's home. She'll see the light.' Ralph pulls away to kiss his cheekbone - he can feel him smile against his skin.

'Guess we'll have to be quiet.' He whispers, and before Jack can ask, he's tugging his shirt over his head, baring his torso for the first time. Jack can't breathe right - he can't even see him properly, but he's already perfect. The glow from outside his open window softens his form and makes him look not at all human. His fingers push up his ribs, making Ralph shiver and bite his lip, tracing the tips of his fingers over his lips lazily.

'You next.' He whispers, and Jack nods, taking off his pyjama shirt, letting Ralph touch his chest and stomach with soft, curious fingers. 'God, what I wouldn't give to see you, love.' Jack laughs quietly, pulling him down on top of him.

'You should talk.' He whispers, taking care of Ralph's belt.

 

They lie naked in each other's arms. To an outsider, it would look like they had just finished having sex, especially with the way Ralph looks at him, chin resting on his chest. Especially with the way they hold hands, fingertips resting against one another, ever so slowly working to rest in the spaces. But the furthest they had gone was running their hands over the entirety of the other's body, just to memorize how it feels under their touch.

'I love you.' Jack murmurs, kissing Ralph's fingertips. Ralph hums and kisses his chest.

'I know,' And then, 'I love you, too.' And with the way he sounds, Jack doesn't care that all they did was touch each other. If he could hear that tone of voice again, Ralph could be sinking a knife into his gut and he'd thank him for it.

He isn't in any hurry to do anything when it came to Ralph. As long as they were together, he'd be happy.


	30. XXV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ok so coffeegrease and few other people requested this so
> 
> more jalger  
> (with messy feelings bc what did u expect when i got my grubby lil hands on this shit)

Jack finds him a week after that night in his room, looking just as bored as he had for most of the night.

'Ralph wants to do it again.' He says, and Roger can't breathe. It's an honour, really. Getting to be included in this relationship, even in a small way. It's this fact, combined with the teensy little detail that he couldn't stop thinking about how Ralph sounded, about how Jack looked at Ralph - like he was the only thing worth living for. Like he would kill for him - that makes Roger straighten up and wipe his hands on his jeans, trying to keep his face neutral.

'And what do you want, Chief?'

'I want Ralph to be happy.' The redhead says, not missing a beat, face unchanging. He says it like it's the easiest thing in the world, because it is. God, Roger wanted to be in on that. He pretends to hesitate, dropping his gaze.

'Where do you want me, and when?'

 

He knocks on Jack's bedroom door at precisely ten thirty. The older boy's voice is muffled from the other side, telling him to come in. Roger half expects to be met with the same sight he had been greeted with the last time he had come into Jack's room. The other half of him hopes it.

Jack sits with his legs spread haphazardly over the bed, and Ralph sits in the space made from the taller boy's spread. He looks up like he hadn't been expecting this, and presses back a smile by biting his lip. Roger swallows and drops his eyes again.

'Close the door. Lock it, too. I shouldn't even be letting you see him.' The only way Jack would look more laid back was if he was smoking. But his pack is unopened on the bedside table. Roger stares at it as he pushes the door shut and locks it. Both boys are watching him intently. Jack leans in to murmur something against Ralph's ear, resting his hand against his throat. Not pressing, barely even touching. Roger watches his thumb trace over his pulse point as he speaks softly, then tilt Ralph's chin up to kiss him, soft and careful. It's so different than what Roger is used to seeing from the boy. He says something else and Ralph smiles, nods and thanks him quietly. Jack's soft look lingers as he looks back to Roger, gesturing for him to come close. He steps up to the side of the bed, and Ralph is the one who reaches out, tugs him onto the bed, barely glancing at Jack as he slides into Roger's lap with ease.

'Hey.' He whispers, sliding his fingers through his hair. Roger shudders and nods in greeting. Ralph's eyes crinkle in a smile, and he kisses the corner of his eye. 'Have you been thinking of me?'

'Every day.' He breathes, and Ralph's breath hitches.

'And Jack?' He repeats the answer, and Ralph looks to the other boy, who has started to take his clothes off. 'You hear that, love?' Jack nods, only looking at Roger now.

'Kiss him.' He says, and Roger isn't sure who he's talking to. He doesn't have time to work it out, as Ralph's lips are on his, hands in his clothes, tugging him closer against him. Jack hums in approval from behind them, his fingers soft on the back of Roger's neck. 'You can touch him, if you want. I don't mind.' He's closer than Roger thought, a solid warmth right behind him as he guides his hands from his sides to Ralph's hips. Roger lets himself lean into him, making sure to bring Ralph with him. The blond breaks the kiss to cup his cheeks briefly, then lean back to pull his shirt over his head. Jack makes a soft noise and leans over to rest his lips on Roger's ear.

'Prettiest thing I've ever seen. Don't you think so?' Roger nods, and Ralph goes pink. Jack's hand goes over Roger's ribs, squeezing painfully tight. 'He's 'specially nice like this, all pink and pretty. Loves attention, but gets all flustered when he gets it. Indecisive little minx.' Ralph hums and stands from Roger's lap, looking between the two. He bites his lip, and hooks his thumbs under his belt, tilting his head to one side and cocking his hips to the other as he considers them.

'You two should kiss.' He says finally, and Roger hesitates. Jack doesn't. He's got his chin in his hold, moving his face towards his with ease. His lips are as warm as the rest of him, as rough and chapped as the rest of him. He's greedy, all grabbing hands and a hot tongue, pressing against his as he rises onto his knees. Roger lets him take whatever he wanted. The noises he makes are pathetic, little moans and gasps as he closes his eyes. He couldn't remember the last time that he had kissed like this. Or, more accurately, been kissed like this.

Jack breaks the kiss, staring down at him for a moment, resting his hand on his cheek, pressing his thumb to his lips. Then he kisses him again, briefer this time, before wetting his lips and dropping his eyes to his body.

'You're the last to get undressed. Again.' There's a note of disappointment in Jack's tone, but Roger doesn't have time to dwell on it when Ralph pulls him up to stand in front of him. He touches his mouth, and Roger wonders if his lips are swollen.

'At least take these off.' He whispers, already unzipping his jacket. The bed shifts and Jack comes up behind them, helping him out of his clothes.

'Don't worry. We can focus on Ralph soon. I know you don't like the spotlight.' He whispers, too quiet for it to be for anyone else. Roger grunts in thanks, and Jack straightens up as soon as he's as naked as they are. He steps around Roger to take Ralph's face in his hands, kissing him softly.

'So?'

'Hm?' Ralph smiles up at him in confusion, and Jack smiles, kissing his throat.

'This is all you, sweet boy. How do you want to do this?'

'I want... I want both of you. Not at the same time, but I... Just want both of you,' His eyes go from Jack to Roger and back again, 'If that's okay.' He adds hastily, and Jack hums, kissing his temple.

'How about positions and all that? Like last time?' Ralph shakes his head.

'I want to see both of you.'

 

They end up on the bed, tangled together. Ralph is in the middle, on his back, and the other two are hovering over him. Jack sends Roger a glance every so often, maybe to check if he's okay with what was happening. Maybe just to check him in general.

Jack has Ralph's cock in his hand, lazily stroking him to hardness as he kisses along his jaw. He's shamelessly rutting into Ralph's thigh to get himself hard, but Ralph doesn't seem to mind. He turns to Roger, smiling softly. He's been cupping his cock in one hand since they laid down, not moving, just pressing down softly as he directed his attention on Jack. Now, that soft press increases in pressure until Roger has to grind into his hand, the friction too good to resist. Ralph kisses his temple and moans from Jack's hand, turning his face into his hair for a moment.

Jack sits up and kisses Ralph quickly. All of them are decently hard by now, so he looks over Ralph carefully, biting his lip.

'C'mere.' He murmurs, and Ralph rises onto his elbows, lifting his chin, clearly expecting another kiss. The side of his jaw is already littered in hickeys, something Jack seems especially proud of. For a split second, his eyes go to Roger's neck, and it's all Roger can do to not swallow, not bring more attention to his throat. Then the redhead looks back to Ralph and bites his lip. The blond had lowered his chin and stuck his bottom lip out in the beginnings of a pout. 'I want you to make Roger come. Can you do that for me?'

'How?'

'However he wants it.' Ralph nods, then looks to Roger, always eager to please, be it Jack or himself, Roger isn't completely sure.

'How do you want me?' He whispers, and Roger _knows_ he'll be thinking about those words for months. And about Jack's face right at this moment; a mix of aroused and adoring and other emotions that are too complex to name.

'Uhm - your... Your mouth. On me. Please.' Ralph doesn't look to Jack for position this time, but Roger does as he moves to settle between his legs. Or maybe he just looks at Jack to look at him. Without looking back at him, Jack reaches for his hand, moving closer and rubbing his thumb over the lines in his palm.

Ralph's mouth is amazingly wet and soft and hot around him, and he's perfect, _fucking perfect_ , looking up at him as he takes him with practiced ease. Fuck. No wonder Jack was fucking addicted to him. With his free hand, he pushes Ralph's hair from his face, gripping a handful of the soft strands. Jack leans down, nosing along his jaw, holding onto his hand as Ralph hollows his cheeks around him.

'Can I leave a mark?' He whispers, and Roger nods, can't even form words as he lets his head fall to the side, pressing down on the back of Ralph's head. Ralph pulls back to watch when Jack mouths along his pulse until he finds a spot that makes Roger shiver, then focuses all his efforts on that single spot. Roger lets out a soft moan in response to the sting of Jack's flat teeth on his pulse. The redhead is relentless, sucking at the tender skin, other hand splayed on Roger's stomach. He pulls away and Ralph takes his length back into his mouth, smiling as best he can when Jack looks down at him, holding out his other hand. Ralph takes it, the slow slide of his lips never faltering.

'How is it?' Jack whispers, and Roger lets out a soft whimper, acutely aware of Ralph's eyes on him, 'You close?' He nods, and Jack hums, pushing his nose to his temple. Ralph wraps his lips tighter around him and hollows his cheeks out. He lets out a loud moan, and Roger comes with a low groan, lurching into Jack. Ralph sits back on his heels and swallows his mouthful. _Fuck_ , Roger had never seen anything hotter than that. He wipes his mouth on the back of his hand and crawls up the bed to inspect the hickey Jack left.

'It's pretty dark, don't'cha think?' He murmurs, touching the side of his neck. Jack hums, kisses the blond's shoulder.

'It's his first one. Why not go dark?' Ralph says something in response, but all Roger can focus on is Jack's word choice - _first one_. Did that mean he was willing to let this happen again?

Jack kisses his neck - presumably on the mark - and sits up against the headboard, beckoning Ralph closer. Roger shakily rolls onto his side, watching them kiss.

Ralph is just as greedy as Jack is, each of them pulling at the other, leaning into one another, focused on nothing but each other's mouth. Roger watches their jaws work in silent fascination, chewing on his bottom lip. The kiss looked as intense as the one he shared with Jack was, maybe even more so. Roger felt like he could watch for hours.

Eventually, they run out of air and break apart, but Jack presses similar kisses over his face, pulling him as close as he can get him.

'Need you. Need you in me.' Ralph all but sobs, and Jack makes a soothing noise, rubbing over his rear.

'I know, sweet boy. You'll get me. You have me. I just need to get you ready, alright?' Ralph nods, and Jack reaches for the lube. He turns to Roger, biting his lip. 'Hold out your hand.'

'Why?'

'I'll not about to fuck him before he's at least gotten some prep.' Roger does as he's told and then warms the lube in his hand before spreading it over his hand, notching a finger against his entrance, then easing in. Ralph lets out a whine and falls into Jack's chest.

'More.' He whispers, and Roger adds another finger, easing in and out of him, scissoring his fingers. Ralph is squirming in Jack's lap, mouth agape. Jack's hand is there, covered in lube, so Roger tries to pull his hand away. The hand is around his wrist, and Jack silently shakes his head and eases one finger in next to Roger's two. Ralph gasps, completely still. Both of them watch him carefully.

'Less?' Jack whispers, but Ralph shakes his head, slowly starting to move back.

'More. Just one more - almost full. So near, baby.' Jack eases a second finger in, and Ralph sobs, moving back on their four fingers. Jack meets Roger's eyes and pushes up as far as he could, making Ralph squeak and fall against him. Roger copies him when he does it again, then hooks his fingers in him. Jack leans over and kisses him, the beginnings of a kiss that was just like the first one, before Ralph pulls him back, hugging him to his chest as his hips twitched and he started the climb to orgasm. Jack moves his fingers in and out quickly, making Ralph cry out loudly, leaving marks on his shoulder.

'I'm so close. So fucking close - don't stop, either of you.' Roger meets the pace Jack had set, and Ralph all but wails, coming on his and Jack's stomachs. Even after he's come, all three boys are reluctant to remove their fingers, now unmoving in him. Finally, Jack pulls out and kisses him, and Roger follows suit, wiping his hand on his chest.

'Fuck,' Ralph whispers, taking Roger's hand, 'That was... Fuck.' Jack hums, pressing himself to his entrance.

 

If Roger had thought that their kisses were intense, the two of them having sex was beyond that. Way beyond that. The week before, Jack had lazily moved in Ralph, if at all. Now, it's all those greedy kisses, quick and desperate movements in hips that make the bed hit the wall multiple times, and loud moans.

At one point they roll over so Jack is on top, and he grabs at their joined hands as he pounds into Ralph, moaning loudly. Ralph sobs and kisses his neck, falling against him.

When Jack comes, he groans Ralph's name, then lets go of him. Ralph is good enough to ride him down from the high, kissing his fingers and smoothing his hair from his face. 

 

Jack rolls off of Ralph, and the blond rolls onto his side. Roger presses to Ralph and takes Jack's hand, and they fall asleep in a tangle of limbs, heads close together. Roger is the last to fall asleep, looking down at the two sleeping boys before closing but his eyes. 

Maybe, just maybe, there would be enough space for him in this relationship without him disrupting anything.

He desperately hopes so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i really like writin roger i need to do it more often  
> my problematic child. mr stabby mcmurderface. i love him


	31. XXVI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> for the anon who asked for vague ass lesbians --- this is what u get. a mermaid au that no one asked for.
> 
> *the rock voice* ur welc

When Jack had first spotted the blonde on the outcrop of rocks, every single instinct had told her to stay away.

And that was before she had noticed the blonde's fish tail, shimmering in the moonlight like a reflection off water.

 

But she still draws nearer, tucking a stay hair back under her bandanna. Like this creature wouldn't immediately sense that she was a woman.

 

When she draws within earshot, the creature turns on her like she was unaware of her presence, and lifts her chin, grinning. Jack could count each pointed tooth hidden behind her plush lips, and her stomach seizes. When she speaks, the creature's voice is smooth and slow. Like she had all the time in the world. Maybe she did.

'Sailor girl,' She calls across the still water, extending a delicate hand. Jack knew that that hand was stained red with blood cleaned off by saltwater. She still rows closer, and takes it. 'What brings you out here, all alone?' The creature yanks her close, and her breath smells like the sea.

'M'ship's crew. Found out I was a woman.' She mumbles, entranced by her sparkling eyes, those bone white teeth. The creature's grin widens as she looks off into the dark horizon, like she expected a ship full of stupid men to crest it, a ship full of weak prey for her to call her sisters upon. Jack certainly expected it.

'Were they to drown you, sailor girl?' Jack nods numbly, and the blonde's delicate fingers are a vice around her sunburnt arm, her voice a spit of venom in her ear. 'Coward.'

 

 

Jack doesn't know how, but she wakes up the docks, wrapped in net with an iridescent scale stuck to her arm. She winces and sits up among the netting that stunk of fish, plucking the scale off and inspecting it, eyes landing on the dark bruise around her wrist.  _How could that be?_ She was sure it was a drunken dream, and that her crew would come to find her soon.

 

Jack soon discovers that she is right.

 

Maurice finds her first, addresses her like Roger hadn't walked in on her wrapping her chest in cloth, then promptly rushed from the cabin, laughing at how she stunk of fish guts and rum. Roger wanders up behind him, eyes lingering on her chest as he sneers. Jack holds his gaze evenly as she tosses the scale away and rubs at her bruise, nods to Maurice.

 

On their way back to the ship, Roger catches her bad wrist, and she winces despite herself.

'Captain,' He addresses, voice cold, 'I do think it's wise if you think any rash decisions through before acting. I wouldn't want the crew to discover your... Situation. It's obvious that your judgement is clouded, due to your gender.' Jack snarls up at him and wrenches her wrist free.

'I do think it's wise, Grimm, that you hold your tongue and remember who outranks who.' She hisses, tucking a stray curl back beneath her bandanna. She was due for a cut, anyways.

 

 

That night, Jack goes back on the water, knife in hand. If anyone would ask her thought process, it would be to hide her copper curls, letting them float away with the current as she sawed them away.

If the vessel happened to drift back towards the blonde, then it just happened to.

 

'Sailor girl,' Sure enough, there she is behind her, voice cold as ice, 'What are you doing with your hair?' Jack drops the first curl and lowers her knife, making sure her bandanna was securely around her wrist, in case a wind blew it away.

'It's too long.' She doesn't look at the creature, but she can hear her move around the boat. It tips as she hoists herself up onto the side, arms slung over it, blonde hair seeming to bleed into the dark water spanning around them. Jack hadn't noticed before, but she has shells woven into her hair, as well as pieces of kelp.

'Pirates keep their hair long. That is what you are, yes?'

'Yes. But so do women.'

'And you are both.'

'I wish I was just a pirate.' The creature regards her carefully, and, with those teeth out of sight, she is a maiden who someone who was good with words would write songs for. Write songs about.

'Follow me.'

 

She takes her to a rock that extrudes from the sea. Maybe the same rock, Jack isn't sure. Jack sits on the lower part, and the girl is above her, knife in hand. Her tail is alarmingly close, and Jack should definitely feel uneasy about arming this creature. But there was something soothing about her fingers smoothing the curls down, cutting the length just above her shoulders. When she is finished, the girl hands her her knife, handle towards her, then smooths her work down, presumably to admire it.

'Why didn't you kill me last night?' She asks, voice quiet. The girl hums, and Jack hadn't realized how close she was.

'Would you have liked me to?' She also hadn't realized how sharp her nails was. Until they were leveled at her throat like a dagger. She swallows and shakes her head, breathless. The creature laughs, the prettiest sound Jack had ever heard, and presses her nails to her skin. Her teeth are sharp on the shell of her ear. 'One day, sailor girl. You'll be begging me.'

 

 

Jack wakes in a cold sweat, her cloth bindings clinging to her chest. She must've forgotten to free them before going to sleep the night before.

She winces as she sits up, lets them fall from her chest. If her nightmare hadn't been fresh on her mind, she would've gone without the cloth for the day. If it hadn't seemed so real, her crew pitching her over the railing and into the sea, where the blonde is waiting to wrap herself around her, a beautiful boa constrictor ready to crush her to death.

She allows herself a moment's break from the confining cloth, before winding it back over her chest and pulling a loose shirt over her head, turning to the smudged looking glass. If Roger saw it, he would accuse her gender of being nothing but vain. She should rid of it.

A glinting scale on her cheek wrenches her thoughts from Roger, and she plucks it from her cheek, tucking it under her bedding without a second thought, more concerned with the thin scratches on her neck, still fresh and open, looking like they had just stopped bleeding. A knock on her cabin door distracts her from inspecting her bed for any bloodstains.

'Yes?' It's a new recruit, a boy who could be no younger than her - maybe 16 at the youngest. Sam. Or his twin brother, Eric. Either way, they were quiet and barely seen without each other. The other twin shadows his brother in the door.

'Captain - we were pulling up the nets and... There's something you should see.'

 

Jack shoulders through the cluster of her crew out on deck, presumably surrounding whatever was caught in the net. A shark maybe - or a big fish.

What greets her is no big fish.

At first glance, she thinks that the creature is her blonde - since when was she hers? - gasping for air and scrabbling at the net. But her hair is too short, her tail the wrong colour. She isn't as breathtaking, but still beautiful. Beauty is dangerous. Jack allows her lip to curl in disgust as she pulls her knife from her belt. The same knife that her blonde had cut her hair with. She briefly wonders what she would say, should she see her like this.

Across the cluster, Roger is staring at her, smiling cruelly, his eyes alight with a thrill she's only seen in his expressions during shootouts and face offs with other ships, when adrenaline was pounding through her own veins. With her head clear, the expression is terrifying.

'Captain?' She snaps to her left, where Maurice is peering over her shoulder at the tangled creature, 'What will you do with it?'

'It's a woman, isn't it? Half of one. It's bad luck to have her aboard.' She casts a cold glance to the twins. 'I'll do what should've originally been done. Cut her loose, toss her back to where she came. Maybe it will gain us the mermaids' favour.' She crouches, not allowing anyone to object.

She has almost finished cutting her free when the creature whispers in her ear, hand on hers.

'Thank you, sailor girl.' The four words drip with subtle sinister undertones, and Jack presses a shudder back.

This was no accident. This creature wove herself into their nets on purpose.

 

 

'My sister told me what you did.' Jack stands alone on the deck, and she jumps, spinning around. Her blonde sits on the ship rail. She's got a shell in her hand, and she holds it like a trumpet, that shark-like smile curling on her full lips.

'Surely you didn't need to be told. You were watching, weren't you?' The blonde hums and tosses her hair over a shoulder, such a human thing to do.

'Of course. You really did scare me with that knife, sailor girl. Thought I would have to conjure up a storm or something.'

'You can do that?' Her smile turns coy as she sets the shell in her lap, holds her hand out to her. Jack takes it without hesitation, and doesn't even flinch when her fingers close harsh around her good wrist. The blonde pulls her close, and leans in, kissing her cheek.

'Thank you, sailor girl. For being like every other man.'

'I'm not a man.' Jack can't think of anything but how close she is.

'On the outside, no. But your heart - you are just as weak as any other. I had hoped you intended to plunge that knife in my sister's heart. Just to show that you have some willpower.'

'I do,' She whispers, setting her hand on the rail and leaning over when the blonde pulls away. The tiniest part of her screams that it would be so easy for the girl to pull her over the side. The blonde smiles, fingers curling into her hair.

'You sure? Because, to me, it looks as though I'm the one with the nets.' When Jack doesn't answer, she gives an experimental tug, just enough to make her sway. She was right - she had her wrapped around her little finger, tight and unintending to let her free any time soon.  
And Jack wouldn't have it any other way.

The next pull is enough to make her gasp and lurch over the side, and the blonde laughs like it's a grand game. To her, Jack supposes, it was. And she was winning. She steadies herself, and the blonde's breath is hot on her face.

'Swim with me, sailor girl.' She urges, and Jack wants to let go. It was the only thing she could think about. This girl, and her intoxicating eyes, enrapturing voice. 'Kiss me. All it takes is one kiss.' Jack wrenches herself away, gasping.

'Maybe another time.' She whispers, unable to breathe properly. The blonde grabs her chin, and it looks like she's about to take the kiss for herself, drag her over wether she allowed it or not. Then she grins that same grin, and drops her hand, taking that shell in her hand. She brings it to her lips, and takes a breath.

 

Jack doesn't remember what note the shell made, but she can feel it in her chest, resonating around her heart and shaking her ribs. 

There are no mysterious scales that morning.

 

'I was thinking about you said, yesterday.' Roger's tone is casual, even though the topic is anything but.

They've docked at some fishing town, and have taken over the local tavern for the night. Jack had expected a snide comment about barmaids from Roger, but none had come.

'Oh?' She takes a deep drink of her rum, and Roger nods.

'You would know all about bad luck on ships, wouldn't you, Captain?' His eyes go to her hair. She had wrapped her bandanna around her head to keep her hair from her eyes, but left it loose in the back. With Roger's eyes on her, she finds that she regrets that decision. 

'Of course, Grimm. That's why I hope for the mermaids' favour. This crew needs all the luck it can get.'

 

 

She isn't sure how she got there, but she lies on a flat rock, still warm even though the sun had long gone down. The girl is above her, fingers in her hair. She's got her head in her lap, and she can't stop looking at that shell, resting by her hip.

'What is that, anyways?' Expressive eyes go to the shell and she smiles.

'A conch shell.' She says it in an obvious tone, and Jack rolls her eyes, reaching back for it.

'I knew that. What's it for?' Before she can touch it, the girl smacks her hand away, and she winces, pulling it to her chest.

'If I told you, I'd have to kill you.' Jack doesn't think she's joking.

A silence settles over them as the blonde resumes running her fingers through her hair, humming under her breath.

'What's your name?' The humming stops abruptly, and her fingers curl painfully into her hair.

'Names have power, sailor girl.' It's all she offers on the matter, so Jack drops it, eager for her to loosen her hold on her hair, scalp already screaming. The blonde's fingers go lax, and so does Jack, sighing in relief.

The silence isn't as comfortable this time around.

 

'Kiss me.' The girl tries again, looking at the lightening sky.

'I can't.' She snarls, pushing her away.

'Of all of the things to fight against, this is what you chose?' She hisses, and Jack blinks in surprise, letting her pull her close, hands painfully tight on her upper arms. 'Stupid girl. You really are a coward.'

'I -'

'Why don't you want me?' She whispers, kissing her brow, hands closing around her throat. She isn't squeezing, but she seems close, the muscles of her arms coiled.

'I do.' She whispers, and the blonde kisses the soft skin under her eyes, darkened from many sleepless nights.

'Kiss me, then. I need you.' Her voice is deceptively wonderful, fingers curling into her shirt, pulling at it.

'What will happen if I do?' She doesn't answer, just drapes herself over her and lets out a pathetic sob. Jack knew they were conjured up, another one of her mind games. She allows herself to play along. 'If I do... Will you love me?'

'Yes,' The blonde sits up, cheeks streaked with tears. 'Oh, yes. I'll be devoted to you. I'll be yours. I'll love like no other. Please.' Jack pulls back and bites her lip.

'The sun is rising.' Without even wiping her cheeks, the girl snarls, and pushes at her chest.

'Fine,' She spits into her face, venom thick in her tone, 'Just don't expect me to come for you when your crew throws you overboard. Fucking idiotic coward.'

 

She wakes in her bed, gasping, her whole body sore. Roger stands over her, frowning deeply.

'The next time we dock, you will leave. Understood?' Jack looks up at him in bewilderment, and he rolls his eyes, grabbing her arm, ignoring her cry of pain as he pulls her into a sitting position.

'This evening, we will dock at a port. You will leave quietly, without fuss. And your secret will follow me to my grave.'

'And if I don't?' Roger straightens up, looks her dead in the eye.

'Then you will be lead to your grave, tomorrow night.'

 

 

The sun sets, and Jack locks herself into her chambers, calmly unwinding the band of cloth from her chest. Someone pounds at her door, voice loud through the sturdy wood. She isn't sure who it is, calling for her to emerge. The whole crew must know about her by now. She continues on her routine, pulling her bandanna from her hair and combing it as best she can with her fingers. The blonde, she finds, can do this much better.

As she prepares to dress for bed, a silver glint catches her eye. She swallows, and picks up the scale, clenching her fingers around it. 

 

 

She falls asleep to pounding at her door, and wakes to silence. The crew must've given up for now, chalking it up to waiting her out. She sighs and steps out on deck, expecting an ambush.

The deck is silent and empty, all but one person. The blonde's presence does not throw her. She extends a hand, and Jack takes it.

'Kiss me.' She whispers, one final time, as Jack steps over the railing. Jack does as she's told.

 

The kiss is slow and the blonde is patient, running her hands over her torso as she pulls them over the edge. It happens so fast that Jack can't even pull back to take her last breath. She doesn't mind.

When they go under, Jack's lungs don't burn. She doesn't struggle. She fades fast, and it's painless.

Before she fades, she only has one thought.

She couldn't have chosen any other way to die.


	32. XXVII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is 4 stefanie

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i asked my gud pal stefanie for an idea nd she gave me this

Ralph liked climbing trees. It was his only passion.

He was climbin up a tree right

nd then he was like 'Oh no I'm too high' (lmao 420 blaze it)

'Help me husband im too high' Jack waz like

'I cant I'm too busy hunting pigs Go get Piggy'

'I cant Piggy sucks and so does his assmar' So Ralph is like @ Simon:

'Ok bf help me down' Simon is like

'Lmao ok bye pig head' Nd he helped him down then they make out for a second bc they in love

 

the end thank u dont forget to smash that like button and subscribe and ring that notification bell because i make new videos every day bye


	33. XXVIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i have officially run out of inspiration for this bs so  
> some quick movie date cuddles nd kisses ft. jalger

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (pls send me requests im dying squirtle)

The couch in Jack's apartment is much too small for all three of them to sit comfortably.

Usually, that was no problem. One of them - usually Ralph - would sit on the floor at the other two's feet and enjoy their attentions, never really paying attention to anything but the two of them.

But now, they all insist on sitting on the couch, Jack and Roger crammed against the arms and Ralph squished between them, remote in one hand and a bowl of crisps in the other.

Jack leans in and presses a quick kiss to the side of his neck, pushing his nose under his jaw and staying there for a moment before he pulls back and reaches past him to stroke his knuckles over Roger's cheekbone. Roger looks down, coughs, then looks across at him, giving him a shy smile. Ralph looks between them and bites his lip, leaning back before turning on a movie, crossing his legs under him, paying no mind to the fact that there really wasn't any space to do so.

He rests his head on Roger's shoulder and takes Jack's hand, thumb smoothing over his scarred knuckles. Jack glances over at the two, half expecting a stab of jealousy. It never comes, instead a pleasant warmth pools in his abdomen as Ralph kisses Roger's jaw, whispering something that Jack can't quite make out to him. Roger hums and turns his cheek into his mouth, hand coming up to smooth through his hair. He catches Jack's eye for a moment and gives him a smile, soft and shy and still slightly guilty. Jack wants to reach out and smooth the crease between his brows when his hold on Ralph falters, wants to reassure him that he was as much as a part of this as either of them were. Instead, he leans over and kisses his knuckles, running his fingertips over the curve of Ralph's shoulder.

'Look at you two,' He whispers, resting his chin in his hand. Roger looks to him, attentive and nervous, 'Both of you are so fuckin' pretty.' Ralph hums and reaches behind him to clasp his hand, looking up at Roger, who pretends to be wrapped up in the movie again. Ralph straightens up and turns to press his back to Roger's side, pulling Jack over them to kiss him softly. Jack reaches for Roger, tugging at his sleeve. The other boy shifts so he's facing him, Ralph fitted against his chest.

Jack breaks the kiss with Ralph to pull at Roger's collar, bringing him into an equally gentle kiss. Roger makes a small noise and leans into it, and Ralph hums between them, fingers brushing over their jaws. Jack opens one eye to look at him, smiling against Roger's lips at the fond smile.

'Like what you see, baby?' He murmurs, pulling away. Roger sits back reluctantly as Ralph nods, twisting to pull him down again, kissing him firmly. Jack leans back to watch them with a soft smile, running his fingers down Ralph's back.

Roger is the one who breaks away, reaching for Jack. Ralph shifts out of the way when he pulls him against his chest, pressing his face against his shoulder.

'Need you close. Both of you.' He whispers, and Jack hums, smoothing his hair down.

'I know, pet.' He whispers, twisting to kiss his temple. Ralph presses close and kisses Jack's neck, sighing as he rests his cheek against Roger's chest.

 

Jack gently ushers Roger to the side to lie on his side, pressed along the back of the couch.

'We should probably turn the film off.' Ralph whines in dissent, raising himself so Roger can move further down and rest beside Jack.

'I'm watching it!' He protests, then flops down onto Roger, earning a heavy exhale as the darker boy braces his arm across the small of his back.

'Alright then.' Jack relents, rubbing Ralph's back mindlessly as he kisses Roger's shoulder. Roger's other arm snakes around his waist as he pushes his face against his shoulder again. Ralph turns his face to Jack and smiles sleepily as his hand goes from his back to his hair, fingers playing through the fine golden strands, and he sighs happily.

'I love you.' He whispers, then turns to Roger, pushing close. 'And you, too.' Jack hums in agreement, letting his eyes close. Roger is silent, but he draws them both closer, nestling further into Jack's shoulder.

They drift off like this, tangled together as the movie plays in the background.

Jack couldn't have asked for anything different. Or anything better.


	34. XXIX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i love all the lotf ships!! jalph, siggy, *squints at smudged writing on hand* jagermeister

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> boyfriends robbin a bank together
> 
> goals, honestly

Jack presses against Roger's back, his breath warm on his neck, hand tight over his elbow.

Usually, this would be a welcome feeling, the press bringing relief and warmth and love to Roger.

But not when he's trying to work out the combination to a bank's safe. Not when Jack is practically secreting nervousness.

'C'mon.' He whispers against his ear, glancing over his shoulder, grip tightening. 'We don't have much time.'

'I _know_. Just - get off my back,' He grunts, never looking away from the keypad. Too many wrong tries and the alarms would blare and the police would come. He knew the numbers - 1,3,7 and 9 were the most worn away on the keypad - but not the order in which they went. And there were dozens of combinations.

'Try 1973.' Jack whispers, lips resting on his shoulder through his mask. The keypad beeps, alarmingly loud in the silent bank lobby, and they wince in unison.

'Wait. When was the bank opened?' Jack pulls back and takes out his phone, hiding it in the folds of his jumper.

'1937,' Roger punches the numbers in, and there is a triumphant beeping, then the heavy slide of the lock receding, 'I was close.' Jack grunts out as he heaves the thick door open, then turns on his phone's flashlight. Roger hums and starts opening drawers, shoving bank notes into his bag. Jack rolls up his mask up to expose his mouth and kisses his cheek.

'Chief,' He's careful not to use his name, 'Help me grab the shit. We need to get out of here.'

 

They get out the same way they came in - a broken window in an office - and throw their bags into the trunk of the car, peeling out of the parking lot.

Jack is sure to drive like a law abiding citizen, but he crows in victory when he passes a cop car stopped at a red light.

 

When they bang into their flat, Jack drops his bag at their feet and pushes Roger up against a wall, hand on his throat.

'Wanna celebrate?' He whispers, mouthing at his jaw.

'Not now.' Roger replies, but fists into Jack's hair and lets his head fall back. Jack hums and sucks a mark into his jaw, then pulls back and holds his hand out.

'C'mon, pet. Let's go see how rich we are.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notice how these are getting shorter and shorter?  
> well ive decided to put all my energy into writing my own novel (lets see how long that lasts) so....... this will be the last update from anything other than the fic im writin for bri for a bit
> 
> love y'all
> 
> follow my [tumblr](https://savajack.tumblr.com) for updates!!!


	35. XXX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What happens in New York stays in New York.  
> ...  
> Right?
> 
> (contains cheating bc... ralph is lowkey a shitty person always lbr here)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bc im travelling rn nd i like to be #topical with w/e is going on in my life rn
> 
> (the dorm they r staying in is based on the dorms at victoria mills bc... im??? staying there while im in cork wow)

It began on the flight to New York.

The cute blond sitting beside Jack had twisted in his seat before take off, fiddling with his fingers as he smiles shyly at him.

'Um. Hi. I'm kinda a nervous flyer, so I was wondering if I could, like, hang on to you or whatever when there's turbulence or stuff going on,' Jack blinks, twirling his earbud between his fingers, biting his lip. The blond looks down and swallows before hurriedly continuing, 'Don't feel like you have to, it's fine if you're not comfortable with it or - '

'That'd be fine.' Jack says suddenly, when he gets a better look at the boy. He was _extremely_ cute. And wearing the same lanyard he did, which meant he was on the same trip. Going to the same destination. _He was totally going to hook up with him by the end of the month_.

'Awesome,' The blond's smile turns pleased as he extends his hand, 'I'm Ralph, by the way.'

'Merridew.'

 

During take off, Ralph grips his hand so tightly that he's sure he'll be bruised. He stares at his knees, chewing on his lip. Jack hesitates, then leans in.

'Breathe.' He murmurs, placing his other hand on his back in what he hopes is a reassuring manner. Ralph glances up at him and takes a shaky breath. Jack hums, satisfied as Ralph begins to take deep, even breaths, and leans back in his seat, closing his eyes.

 

He wakes up about an hour later to find Ralph's cheek resting on his shoulder. The blond is asleep, still holding his hand, regardless of how both of their hands are incredibly gross and sweaty by now. Jack shifts under him and Ralph sits up, rubbing his eyes and breathing in sharply.

'Sorry,' He mumbles, letting go of his hand. Jack wipes it on his jeans and shrugs.

''s alright.' Ralph hums and shifts away, seeming to draw himself in, resting his head against the wall of the plane.

 

As they descend, Jack silently turns his palm up to the ceiling, not moving. Ralph glances over and and swallows, then takes his hand, staring down at his knees. Jack leans over the arm rest to whisper in his ear.

'Remember to breathe,' He pauses, bites his lip, then reaches out to brush his hair behind his ear, 'pretty boy.'

By the sound of it, the nickname does the exact opposite of helping him breathe. Jack is still happy with the results.

 

Jack finds out that he and Ralph - and two other boys, which he wasn't thrilled about - are in the same room. Ralph's eyes meet his as he leads the three other boys into the building, and the blond smiles shyly. Jack smiles back, then bites his lip as he turns away.

  
He fully intended to have this boy wrapped around his finger by the end of the week.

 -xXx-

Jack pushes into the common room in the evening, a sandwich in his hand. Ralph is sitting on one of the couches, on his phone, headphones in, clearly Facetiming someone.  
He's got tears in his eyes, and he smiles shakily.

'I miss you, too, baby.' He murmurs, and Jack falls onto the couch beside him, pressing his thigh to his. Ralph shifts away and nods, looking down.

'Yeah, I'm having fun. Mhm. Yeah, of course! I'm gonna take so many pictures, it's gonna rock your socks off.' Jack suppresses a snicker and takes a bite of his sandwich, peeking at who he's talking to. Another blond lies in bed, looking tired. He checks the time - it would be past midnight, over in England. He falls back against the couch and puts his feet up on the coffee table.

Something the other blond says makes Ralph flush pink and cough, biting his lip.

'Sam! I'm with my roommate - I know I've got my headphones in, but _still_...' He glances at Jack, still pink, then back at his phone, '...I can't, baby. It's too weird.'

Jack loses interest in the conversation quickly, more interested in how the flush goes past the collar of his shirt, and he wants to get this boy naked, see just how far the flush goes. Instead, his eyes go to his mouth when he wets his lip, bites his lip. He says something, and Jack realizes he's talking to him.

'Hm?'

'I'm gonna... Go to my room. See you later?'

'Oh, definitely.' Ralph's gaze lingers on him and he swallows thickly, then stands quickly, speaking quietly into his phone.

 

Jack is glad that his room is right next to Ralph's. And that the walls were thin. Which meant that he heard  _everything._ And that meant that Ralph heard everything, too.

One night later that week, he hears a sudden, stifled noise from the other room, then a thump and another, longer, louder noise. His jeans tighten when he realizes it's a moan. He bites his lip, imagining Ralph on his bed, fist pressed to his mouth as he bucks helplessly into his hand. Jack leans back in the chair at his desk and calmly undoes his fly, pushing his jeans down his hips. He palms himself lazily through his briefs, listening closely. There comes another stifled moan, then a quiet curse.

Jack imagines finding an excuse to go to his room, pretend not to know about what Ralph was doing, then offer to help him, sit beside him and press open mouthed kisses to his neck as he finishes him off, reduce him to a moaning, pink mess under his hands. Get him addicted to his hands, his mouth. His cock.

He doesn't remember taking himself out of his briefs, but he certainly isn't complaining. He grabs a tissue from the desk and leans against the cheap wood, grabbing at it as he strokes himself slowly, letting himself groan. Letting himself be heard. He hears a choked sound come from the next room, then a gasp. Jack groans again, then whisper Ralph's name. It makes the other boy whimper and moan his name out in response, muffled by something. He falls into a short silence as he focuses on his hand, lurching into the desk and humming.

'Wish this was your hand, pretty boy.' He murmurs, and Ralph whimpers again. The sound is closer, and Jack grins, picturing the boy scooting closer to the wall, flushed pink like he was that evening in the sitting room. Only, this time, it would be because of him. Jack bites his lip at the thought and works himself faster.

'I wouldn't use my hand.' Ralph says shyly, quietly, and Jack stops, so thrown by his comment. He looks up at the wall and bites his lip harder.

'W-what would you use, pretty boy?' It comes out in a whisper, so he says it again, louder, starting to stroke himself again. Ralph coughs on the other side of the wall, and Jack leans forward to press his forehead against it.

'My mouth.' He whispers back, and Jack curses loudly, because  _goddamn_ if he didn't spill right then and there, fumbling with the tissue to keep himself from making a mess, grabbing at the edge of the desk. He hisses out a groan between his clenched teeth and bucked up into his hand, then laughs tiredly. 'Merridew?' There's an edge of hurt in Ralph's voice. Jack slumps forward to rest his elbow on the desk.

' _Fuck_ \- the things you do to me, pretty boy. Usually, my stamina is bit better.' Ralph whimpers and Jack can hear the creak of the shitty bed.

'Did you come?'

'Yeah.' Ralph moans quietly, and Jack grins. 'All for you, pretty boy. Fuck, do I wanna see you right now. Bet you look so fuckin' nice. Can I?' Ralph is silent for a moment, and Jack thinks he's lost him. Knows he has, when he speaks.

'I have a boyfriend, Merridew.' Jack scoffs and leans back in his chair, tossing the tissue in the bin.

'So it doesn't matter when there's a wall between us?'

'It doesn't count. I was... I was the one doing it. It's just... It's just wanking.' Jack laughs bitterly and tucks himself back into his briefs, doing his jeans back up and standing.

'Whatever.' He spits out and goes to take a shower, ignoring Ralph's quiet curse.

 

Over the next week, Ralph can't look him in eye, flushing whenever he does. Jack pretends not to notice, determinedly ignoring him. Once or twice, he deliberately touches him, notices the way his breath hikes and how he shifts into his touch, no matter how fleeting the contact is. Jack pretends that he isn't immensely pleased every time he gets that reaction.

 

No one else is in the dorms when Jack raps on Ralph's door, in search of his laptop, then walks in, absorbed in his phone.

'Hey, have you seen my-' He's cut off by a curse, and he looks up to see Ralph scrambling to cover himself. Jack raises his brows and pockets his phone, missing laptop forgotten for the moment. Ralph swallows thickly and drops his phone on the bed to cover himself better, and Jack walks over to sit on the bed. 'You need some help with that?' Ralph goes pink and slowly drops his hands, looking away.

'What, are we in some bad porn- _oh_.' His nervous reply is cut off with a soft groan as Jack ghosts his palm over the head of his cock. Jack grins and leans in, nosing at his collarbone.

'It's a simple question, pretty boy. I can make you come, or you can make yourself come. What is it gonna be?' Ralph drops his chin to his chest and whimpers as Jack rubs his thumb over his hipbone.

'You.' He chokes out, then tacks on as an afterthought; 'Please.' Jack hums and runs his fingers over his thighs lazily.

'What about your boyfriend? You know, the one you were so concerned about last week?' Ralph whimpers and bucks his hips up into the empty air, 'What does this mean to you?'

'What... What he doesn't know won't kill him,' He hisses out, grabbing at his arm, 'And this - _fuck_ \- doesn't mean anything to me. It's just a shag.' Jack hums in agreement, eyes wandering over the bedspread as he brushes his palm over the head of his cock again, making the blond's hips jerk up. His eyes land on his phone, screen still lit up. Ralph is too slow in stopping him when he grabs for the phone, grinning as he bites at his shoulder and wrapping his hand around his shaft.

'That your boyfriend's dick?' He whispers, and Ralph flushes, seemingly torn between bucking up into his hand and grabbing the phone away. He settles on the former, pushing into his hand with a desperate noise. 'No wonder you're so desperate. Bet he doesn't even get you where you need to be.' Jack murmurs into his collarbone, eyes locked on the picture.

'That's not - ' Ralph tries to take the defensive for his boyfriend, but quickly devolves into another choked noise as he leans into Jack.

'I bet that you have to do all the work for yourself. That it's nothing more than a glorified wank.' Ralph whines and presses his face into his neck. 'Tell me, pretty boy. Does he fuck you hard or slow?'

'Slow. And soft. I like it like that.' Ralph manages, and Jack scoffs.

'Hm. And here I thought that you were dirty. The prettiest boys always are - begging to be bent over and fucked until they can't sit for a week.' The blond moans, and Jack grins, biting at his ear. 'Does that sound good, baby boy? You want me to do that for you?' Ralph whimpers and presses his nose under his jaw, nodding.

'Yes,' He murmurs, hips twitching up into his hand. Jack moves his hand faster, pulling Ralph into his lap. He pushes his thighs open and rests his chin on his shoulder, watching his hand work in silence. The room is filled with Ralph's noises - gasps and curses and long moans - as the blond scrabbles at his arm, throwing his head back to rest on his shoulder. Jack is aware of his eyes on his face, but he doesn't look back at him, even when Ralph whispers his name, even when he moans it, loud and bouncing off the walls of the sparsely-furnished room.

'Jack - I'm so - ' He ends in a sob and a curse as he buckles forward. Jack calmly braces an arm across his chest and holds him against his chest.

'Don't worry, pretty boy. Just do what you need to do. I've got you.' Ralph curses quietly, then spills into Jack's hand with a cry, writhing in his grasp as Jack helps him through it with even strokes of his hand.

Once Ralph has calmed down, he whines at the incessant stroking and pushes at his wrist.

'Too much.' He whispers, and Jack pulls away, wiping his hand on Ralph's thigh before urging him from his lap. Ralph tucks his legs under him. 'What about you?'

'I thought you said it was too much.'

'Yeah, but... You're still hard. And you said you'd fuck me.' Jack hums and stretches, barely glancing at him. He knew that would drive him crazy.

'Maybe later. If you beg all nice and pretty for me.' Ralph whines in dismay, grabbing at his sleeve. Jack looks at him then, grabbing his chin. Ralph freezes, lips parted, pupils blown wide. Jack studies his expression calmly and allows a slow, languid smile to claim his features.

'If you're this pretty after every time you come, this could become a regular occurrence.' Ralph whimpers and tilts his chin up in his hold when Jack shifts his hand to cup one side of his jaw. He pulls him up, noting how Ralph leans forward into his hands, then bites at his bottom lip until Ralph yelps and pulls back, fingers brushing over his lip.

'Don't forget what this is, pretty boy.' He murmurs, then drops his hands, walking out of his dorm.

 

'Merridew,' It's an ungodly hour, and Jack groans, rolling over in the firm bed to squint into the dark room, 'You up?'

'The fuck, Ralph?' He groans, then the light turns on, and he pushes his face into his pillow.

'I need you.'

'For what?' Jack rubs at his eyes and flops onto his back, trying to think of something other than  _Ohmygod it's so fuckin' late. I'm so tired_ when Ralph climbs onto him, saying nothing as he presses his rear to his groin.

_Oh._

'I told you, you gotta beg, pretty boy.' He grumbles out, stretching as best he can with this added weight, opening one eye to look up at the blond. Ralph sighs and sinks down low, forearms resting on either side of his head.

'I don't even know your first name,' He breathes, and Jack shivers, 'How am I supposed to beg?'

'It's Jack.' He whispers back. If he had been awake, he would've denied it from him, and instead told him to figure it out. Ralph hums, fingers brushing over his temple and down the side of his face.

'Please, Jack,' He whispers, rolling his hips down, 'I need to be fucked.' Jack closes his eye and grips his hips to still him, steady him.

'How do you need it?' He prompts.

'Hard. Fast. Make me scream. Make me forget my own name,' He pauses, wets his lips, then runs his lips lightly over his jaw, 'Make me forget my boyfriend's name.'

That piques Jack's interest, and he opens both eyes, sits up a little. He swallows thickly and tries to shift so Ralph wouldn't be able to tell that he was getting hard. It's too little too late, however, and Ralph shifts down against him, smiling like a cat.

'You need me to stretch you, baby boy? Feel that burn, that sting - you'd look so pretty, filled up with my cock, Ralph.' He whispers, bending his head to bite his collarbone. Ralph whimpers and nods. 'Say it, baby boy. Tell me how much you need it.'

'So much,' He breathes, pushing his face into his hair, 'Too much. It's all too much. I need you to relieve some of it.' Jack hums, hands going to his hips, lifting him up gently.

'I know, baby boy. Don't worry 'bout it - I got you.' He whispers, working Ralph's briefs - it's all he wears - down his hips. Ralph hums gratefully, his hands going to his own trousers, and Jack stops him, dropping this act.

'What is this to you?' Ralph stops, looks down at him strangely.

'It's just a shag.' He says, biting his lip, then Jack nods for him to continue, lifting his hips so he can tug his trousers down.

Ralph climbs down to kneel between his legs, pressing the heel of his hand to his growing bulge. Jack lets out a shuddering breath, but says nothing, does nothing, holding completely still. Ralph hums and slides his fingers down his shaft, watching closely for a reaction. Jack gives him none, and Ralph looks a little disappointed, tugging at his shirt with his other hand.

Jack peels it off and tosses it away, never looking away from Ralph, his fingers smoothing through his hair after the shirt lands on the carpeted floor by his bed.

'Pretty boy,' He whispers, and Ralph wets his lips, leans down, and kisses him through his briefs, 'Lemme see you all fucked out.' Ralph looks up then, biting his lip and grinning.

Ralph tugs his briefs down and off, then climbs off the bed.

'Fuck me over the desk.' He murmurs, cheeks darkening. Jack hums and calmly gets out of bed, herding him to the desk with his hands tight over his hips. Once Ralph's thighs are pressed to the cheap wood, Jack pushes him down over the surface and leans over him, biting at his shoulder.

'Dirty boy,' He whispers, fitting his cock against his arse, running his hand down his back. Ralph shivers and pushes his rear back against him, gripping the edge of the desk. 

'Please, Jack,' He whispers, and Jack hums, pressing into him slowly.

 

After they've finished, they dress again, across the room from each other, and Ralph slips out of the room in silence as Jack returns to bed.

 

This happens often - everytime Jack is horny. Everytime Ralph misses Sam. Unspoken rules develop between them, and they stick to those rules like a religion.

'What is this to you?' Jack whispers every time, pushing him into the nearest surface.

'It's just a shag.' Ralph replies every time.

They never face each other. They never kiss, unless it's in the heat of the moment. Jack doesn't go gentle, but, sometimes, Ralph still says the wrong name. (Or the right name. Jack isn't completely sure which.)

 

They stick to these unspoken rules religiously. Until their last night in America.

Ralph is looking at him dangerously, soft and too fond for his liking, as he talks to one of their roommates about what it's like to be in love.

'It's like - they're your whole world, y'know? You breathe for them. You live for them.' Ralph's eyes are on his, and a hint of a smile plays on his lip. Jack frowns at him, then speaks.

'Maybe you should call your boyfriend. Tell him all of this.' Ralph frowns back, then stands.

'Maybe I will.'

 

That night, Jack doesn't ask him what it was. He was scared of the answer. Instead, he lets Ralph pull him to his bed, lets him nuzzle into his neck. It's too soft, but he doesn't say anything.

'I miss Sam.' He murmurs, but his voice is uncertain, trembling, his fingers tightening around Jack's wrist.

'I know.'

'Could you, um, do it like he does? Just this once?'

'If you want to be fucked by your boyfriend, just wait until tomorrow.' He says coldly, and starts pulling away. Ralph grabs for him and whines when he rips away. 

His hand is on the doorknob when Ralph speaks, voice vulnerable.

'Please, Jack. I need you.'

Jack hangs his head and sighs, shoulders slumping in defeat, then turns back to Ralph.

'What do you need, pretty boy?' He whispers, and Ralph swallows. Blinks back tears. (This was too soft. Too intimate. It scared Jack.)

'No pretty boy. Not tonight. Please.' Jack sighs again and steps closer.

'Okay,' He pauses, pushes his nose into his hair, 'Ralph.' He feels him shiver, push closer. Hears his breath hitch. He runs his fingers over his jaw, slowly, then presses his hands over his ribs, guiding him onto the bed.

'How does Sam do it?' Jack murmurs, and Ralph jumps. Like he had forgotten about Sam.

'Uh - slow. Sweet.' Jack resists the urge to turn his nose up. 'He usually lets me ride him or look at him. When we...' Jack hums, kissing along his shoulder, and Ralph shifts under him, 'But you don't have to do it  _exactly_ like him.'

'That's what you asked for.' Jack says into his skin, gathering his shirt in his hands. Ralph whimpers and presses closer.

'Yeah, but...' Jack swallows.  _What is this to you?_ It plays on his tongue, but he still can't gather the courage to ask him, on the chance that the answer will be one he doesn't like. '... I just want something slow today. That's it.'

'That's it?' Ralph nods, and Jack pushes him down to the mattress, slowly pulling his shirt off. Ralph shudders under his slow hands and bites his lip, meets his eyes. Jack swallows again, leans down to mouth at his ear.

'What is this to you?' He whispers finally, voice weak. The answer is only one word, but at least a full minute passes before Ralph says it. Before Ralph takes a quiet breath, pushes his nose into his jaw. Neither of them breathe for that whole time. Neither of them move.

Ralph's voice is even weaker than Jack's when he speaks.

'Everything.'


	36. XXXI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> peaches & cream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired by the fact that all my kitchen smells like atm is fuckin peaches
> 
> (spoiler alert : the peaches dont play a big role. this is p much just pwp bc??? best kinda porn if u ask me)

The kitchen of Jack's apartment always smelt like peaches nowadays.

Ralph loved them, and always insisted that Jack keep some around his place in the high chance he would want one when he was over. Like now.

The blond sits cross-legged on his sofa - something he wants to object to. It was white and, knowing Ralph, he would get juice all over it - a peach in a napkin in his hand. Jack leans on the wall and watches him eat in silence.

'How do you manage to make that look hot?' He asks, breaking the silence, and Ralph looks up, teeth just breaking the delicate skin of the peach. He licks his lips and pulls the fruit away from his mouth, and smiles broadly up at him.

'I guess I'm just perfect.' He says jokingly, and Jack straightens up, walking over to him.

'You don't need to tell me twice.' He whispers as Ralph takes another bite, a drop of juice rolling down his chin. Jack collects it with his thumb, and Ralph lowers the fruit with a suppressed grin as he takes his thumb in his mouth, lips wrapping around it.

Jack removes his thumb and eases his index finger into his mouth, up to the knuckle. Ralph doesn't flinch, doesn't even blink until Jack pulls his hand away and wipes it on his shirt.

'You're so pretty.' He whispers, moving the peach to the coffee table and sitting beside him. Ralph immediately climbs into his lap, sticky fingers burying in his hair.

'Is that so?'

'Yeah.' He pulls him down into a kiss that tastes overwhelmingly like peaches, bites at his bottom lip until Ralph moans. 'So fuckin' pretty. All I wanna do is just,' He pulls away, kisses his neck, 'Make you mine.'

'I'm already yours.' Ralph replies, already pink and breathless, gasping quietly.

'Then cement it, I s'pose.' Jack whispers into his skin before sucking several marks into his neck, stroking his fingers along his jaw.

'Take me to bed?' Ralph whispers, legs already locking around his waist. He smiles up at him before lifting himself off the couch as best he can with the added weight, grabbing his hips. Ralph kisses him again, and Jack collides into the coffee table, cursing quietly into the kiss as he staggers into the bedroom, dropping Ralph onto the bed. The blond bounces when he lands, then lifts himself onto his elbows, meeting Jack halfway, stealing yet another kiss as his belt is tugged free, tossed across the room. Jack braces his hand over his neck, tugging his fly down smoothly. Ralph breaks the kiss to take his shirt off, bending up into him and whining quietly.

He murmurs his name as Jack eases his hand into his jeans, cupping him through his briefs. Jack hums, kissing his Adam's apple lazily. 'Please, Jack.'

'What is it, baby?' Ralph curses as his hand leaves for a moment, then slips smoothly into his briefs, fingertips brushing over his shaft.

'I need -' Jack pulls his jeans down his hips, letting them drop to the floor at the foot of the bed. Ralph whines and curses again, biting his lip.

'What do you need? I'll give you anything you want.'

'You,' Ralph whispers, pulling him down to press his face into his shoulder. Jack blindly works his briefs down and off, leaving him naked under him. He wants to pull away, look over him and appreciate what's spread out under him, _for_ him. Instead, he cups his neck with one hand, kissing his ear as he rubs his palm over him slowly. Ralph groans at the contact, the gentle friction, presses his hips up into his hand.

'You've got me, baby. You've always got me.' Jack whispers, pushing his face into his hair. Ralph nods, gripping at his back.

'Take your clothes off.' Jack breaks away to do as he's told, pausing only briefly to look over Ralph's torso appreciatively before pulling his shirt off, then ridding himself of his jeans, his briefs. Ralph pulls him back down as soon as he does, fingertips pressing to the skin between his shoulder blades.

'I love you.' He whispers, fitting his forehead against the hollow of his cheek. Jack takes a fistful of hair, cradling him close and kissing his temple as he presses his hand over him again.

'I love you, too, baby.' He replies quietly, mouthing at his temple.

'Fuck me, Jack.' His hips bend up into his, legs slinging over his waist. Jack swallows, pulls away.

'Hold on.' He murmurs, climbing off him to the head of the bed, searching for the lube and falling against the headboard. Ralph tilts his head back to watch him, whining softly.

'What're you doin'?'

'Only half hard, baby.' Ralph rolls onto his stomach and bites his lip, watching him stroke himself.

'I can help.' He practically purrs, crawling up the length of the bed, brushing his lips over the tops of his thighs. Jack curses and pushes his hair from his face.

'You don't have to.'

'I want to.' He remains where he is, barely between his knees, and takes his cock in his hand, stroking him slowly. Jack's knees jump in pleasure and he frames his face with his thighs, regarding him silently. Ralph kisses his hipbone, reaches for his hand. Jack takes his extended hand, brings it to his lips and kisses along the knuckles, squeezing his wrist assuredly. The blond stops his ministrations to watch him, leaning his cheek against his thigh. Jack grins, kissing his thumbnail before letting his hand rest on his chest, fingers wrapped loosely around his wrist.

'You're so - '

'Yes?' Ralph breathes, thumb working over the head of his cock. Jack bites his lip and cups the side of his head, fingers pressing into his skull.

'You're so amazing, Ralph. So perfect. So... You.'

'So me?' Ralph laughs, playfully biting his hipbone, causing his hips to twitch off the bed. 'How can I not be me, love?'

'I dunno. But don't stop. Don't ever stop.' Ralph pauses, hand shifting to his thigh.

  
They stare at each other in silence for a moment, and then Ralph swallows, kissing his abdomen.

'You think you're hard enough yet? I wanna be up there with you.'

'C'mere, baby.' Jack whispers, and Ralph climbs up onto his lap as the taller boy shifts back to sit up against the headboard.

'Don't stop being you, either.' Ralph whispers as Jack opens the bottle of lube he had been toying with since he had gone up the length of the bed. Jack grabs at the side of his neck, thumb pushing up under his jaw. He pulls him into a kiss as he spreads some of the lube over his length, over Ralph's entrance.

'I won't, baby. I promise.' With that, he eases into Ralph, and the blond arches back away from the kiss, hand slapping over the one on his neck. Jack tugs him back down, draping an arm across his back. 'That's it, baby, you're good. I've got you.' Ralph moans, hips working back in order to grow accustomed to the stretch.

'Fuck, Jack, this is so fucking good,' He grits out, and Jack nods, hips moving up against his rear, 'I love you. I love you so fucking much.' Jack pulls him close, holds him close, cradling his head into the crook of his neck, hand working between them. Ralph grabs his arm and tugs at it, cheeks pink.

'Wait. Just... No hands right now. I just wanna feel this. Focus on this.' Jack nods, resting his hand on his hip.

'Of course, baby. Whatever you need.'

'What I need is for you to stop talking and _go faster_.' He grits out, and Jack grins, adjusts his hold on Ralph to lower him to the mattress, keeping their hips flush together.

'You want fast?' He murmurs, stopping his movements altogether, letting Ralph fuck himself on his length.

'God, _yes_ ,' Ralph sobs out, and Jack grins, pulling almost all the way out, lingering for a moment. Ralph hisses out a breath through his teeth, grabbing for his shoulder. He starts to say his name when Jack pushes back in suddenly, and the name ends in a drawn out moan. Jack leans down over him to bite at his jaw, hips moving into him, quick and hard.

'This good?' He whispers, and Ralph nods, grabbing at his hair.

'Don't stop.' His voice is soft and far-off, and Jack laughs quietly, kissing the bite mark, his pace never faltering.

'Wasn't planning on it.'

'Good.'

 

Minutes pass before Jack nears climax, but when he finally does, Ralph catches his face in his hands and kisses him long and hard, swallowing his loud cry as he pulls out, spills onto his stomach. The kiss lingers until Jack rolls off of him, panting.

'You're alright?' He murmurs, taking Ralph's hand. Ralph nods and turns to him, pressing his face into his neck and humming in content. 'Did you come?'

'Nah.'

'C'mere, then.' Ralph sits up against the headboard, and Jack sits by him. He kisses his shoulder, casting a quick glance at his cock. 'Doesn't look like you need much.'

'I need _something_. And you offered, so...' Ralph makes a vague motion, and Jack grins, kissing him quickly, pushing his palm over his shaft. The pace is slow, but not so slow that it would drive Ralph mad. Just fast enough to get him there in a decent amount of time. Ralph moans softly, forehead falling forward to press to Jack's. 'That's it...' He whispers, hand resting on Jack's forearm. 'Just like that. Keep doing that.' He murmurs, and Jack nods, eyes dropping from his to watch his work, wrapping his hand more solidly around him now.

'So demanding.' He whispers, and Ralph laughs breathlessly, hips jerking into his hand.

'Learned from the best.' Ralph replies, voice strained, and Jack grins, kissing his cheekbone. He pulls his hand away, and Ralph whines in protest, hips lifting in pursuit. Jack sits up to raise a brow, then move to lie on his front between Ralph's legs. Ralph watches him carefully, curiously, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth. Jack bites his own lip to press back a smile as he runs his fingertip around the head of his cock, slowly and teasingly. What was that about not driving Ralph mad?

'Jack - ' Ralph's eyes are round as he watches him, fingers curling into his hair.

'Shh. Lemme do this for you. It'll be good, promise.' Ralph swallows and nods, poorly concealing a needy moan when Jack brushes his thumb over the slit, eyes never leaving his face. His hips buck up in search of more contact, but Jack uses his free arm to brace across his hips, brow furrowing. 'Ralph,'

'I know, I know. Fuck. You're just so -  _infuriating_ sometimes.' Jack grins, kissing his hipbone.

'If you beg, I'll finish you off with my mouth.' He teases, thumb running down the underside of his shaft lightly. Ralph shudders and bites his lip, looks towards the ceiling.

'Please, Jack.'

'Please what?'

'Please, no more teasing. I need you, love, I need your mouth, or your hand or something over than just your fingertips,' Jack runs his fingertips in a spiral down the length of his cock and Ralph sobs, scrabbling at his shoulders. 'Please, please, please, Jack - I need to come. I need it so badly, love.' Jack hums, and slowly leans over, his breath hot on his length. He pauses, considers his face until Ralph lets out a desperate sob and grabs at his shoulders, hips pushing against his pressing arm in need. Finally, thankfully, Jack takes his entire length in his mouth in one smooth movement, and Ralph cries out loudly, arching off the mattress as he comes.

'There we are,' Jack murmurs, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. When Ralph realizes he swallowed his mouthful, a surge of arousal shoots to his sore member, and he presses it back, kissing him quickly. 'Perfect. Perfect boy - my perfect boy.' Ralph nods tiredly, slumping against him when he takes him into his arms.

'Thank you.' He whispers, and Jack hums, runs his hand through his hair.

'You wanna finish your breakfast?' He asks softly, and Ralph snorts, nuzzling his face into his chest, closing his eyes.

'I'm the opposite of hungry right now.'


	37. XXXII.i

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do u like the aesthetics of the '20s??? do u like lesbians??? do u like my writing???? no???  
> too bad this is happening

****Jack watches from the back of the bar as the new singer takes the stage, fiddling with her fingers.

Roger had found her, a skinny blonde girl with too-wide hips and too-long hair to be fashionable. It's pinned into a faux-bob now, carefully and meticulously styled and shining in the spotlight. Jack leans back in her seat and purses her lips before turning to Roger.

'She better be good enough for my band.' Roger doesn't reply before the band starts up, and the blonde bites her lip, leaning into the microphone. The song is a usual one, and Jack is usually bored by the chorus. How many times can a girl listen to  _Everybody Loves My Baby_ without wanting to claw her ears out? Not a lot, apparently.

But now, this blonde has her full attention with her slow swaying and dreamy voice as she looks out at the crowd through long lashes. Jack wets her lips and takes a sip of her drink, unable to turn away from the blonde, even when she registers that Roger is staring at her.

The song ends, and she looks down, and clears her throat.

'Well, she's no Bessie Smith, I'll tell you that.' She addresses Roger, who raises a brow and looks back to the stage as another song starts up.

 

After the set, Jack catches Roger's arm.

'Bring her to my office.' She orders, finishing her drink. She doesn't wait for a confirmation before she's marching out into her office.

  
She has just lit a cigarette when Roger comes in with the blonde girl, hand wrapped around her upper arm. Her eyes are as round as saucers, and her teeth - straight, white, perfect. Fake, no doubt - press into her bottom lip harshly. Jack rolls her eyes.

'Jesus, Roger. Be a little more gentle with the girl.' Roger nods and lets go, then steps back out, closing the door. Jack sets the cigarette in her ashtray, careful to make sure it's still lit, then turns her attention to the girl. She rubs her arm, looking down at her shoes.

'Is that your dress, or did you borrow it from another one of the girls?'

'Its mine, ma'am.' She says shyly, fiddling with the fringe. Jack hums and walks around her desk to stand over the girl, touching a sequin.

'Its pretty. What else do you do to be able to afford diamonds like those around your neck?'

'I just sing, ma'am. That's all I'm good at.'

'Surely you've got other talents,' The girl shakes her head, 'So what? Your daddy buy them for you?' The blonde doesn't answer, but her silence says a thousand words. Jack hums, takes her chin in hand to tilt it up. Their eyes finally meet, and the blonde immediately flushes. 'What's your name, songbird?'

'Ralph,' She whispers back, fingers curling at her sides. Jack hums, taking down a clip from her hair. A thick wave falls over her shoulder to hang down her chest.

'Family name?'

'Gornick.' A grin splits her face, and Jack grips her shoulder. She knew that name - it was pasted on every business in town.

'What's a rich girl like you doin' in a place like this?'

'Just singing, ma'am.' She replies, dropping her gaze. Jack bites her lip, turns them around to push Ralph against the mahogany of her desk. Almost immediately, the girl whimpers and raises herself to the balls of her feet, as if to hop up onto it.

'Tell me, songbird. Does this mouth do anything else other than sing?' Her flush darkens, but she doesn't answer. Jack's grin widens. 'Give me a kiss, won't you?' Ralph looks up at her, eyes round, and she bites her lip. After a moment's hesitation, she does as she's told, before quickly pulling away.

'My father will be expecting me, ma'am, I should...' She tries ducking out from her hold, but Jack presses her further still against her desk, making her gasp.

'If you wanted to please your father, you wouldn't be here, baby girl.' Ralph whimpers but spreads her legs. Jack wonders if she's good with her mouth, with her hands. Other singers are - they can make her quiver and scream in moments flat. This girl doesn't seem like the type, doesn't need to be the type to take anyone to bed. She probably hasn't even thought of taking anyone to bed, even for reasons other than making enough money to make rent. 'Stay for a while. Lemme show you other things to do with that sweet mouth of yours.'

Ralph lifts herself onto the desk, and Jack grins, fitting between her spread knees, opening them further. She rests her hand over her chest and presses closer.

'You use a corset or are you just lucky?' She whispers, and Ralph flushes.

'A Bramley.' She whispers, voice weak, and Jack grins, hand working between her legs.

'Hm. You've gotten all dressed up, haven't you? Too bad I'll ruin it.' She drops to her knees and pushes the short dress further up her thighs, along with her tight undergarments. She stops at her bloomers, short and ruffled at the hem, and looks up at her. 'You want this, yes?' Ralph bites her lip and pauses before nodding, face red.

'Yes, ma'am.' She breathes, and Jack grins, tugging her bloomers down and off. She tugs a leg over her shoulder and glances up at Ralph again, teasing her fingertip against her entrance.

'Look at you. All pink and pretty and ready for me. Anyone ever touch you here?' Ralph shakes her head, biting her lip. She probably would've flushed darker if it were possible. 'No? Not even yourself? You can tell me, y'know.'

'No one, ma'am. I've never... Even felt like this before.'

'Like what, beauty?' The wetness gathered around her finger is enough of an answer, but Jack wants to get this girl squirming in every possible way.

'Um. I dunno how to -'

'Just try.'

'Like I'm 'bout to explode.' Jack hums, kisses the inside of her thigh.

'I know what you mean, songbird. I'll take care of it for ya.' Ralph barely whispers her gratitude when Jack pushes her finger into her, lips wrapping around her clit. She cries out in pleasure - no. She screams, definite loud enough to be heard over the music out in the club, her thighs seizing around her head. Jack doesn't mind - if she was this responsive to everything she wanted to do to her, it would take no time at all for her to be devolved into a quivering, overly-sensitive mess.

'That's it, beautiful. Tell me what you like.' Ralph gasps as Jack's tongue pushes against her, broad and flat over her clit. She grabs a handful of her hair and slaps a hand over her mouth, heel digging into her back. Jack winces - she should've gotten her to take those shoes off before anything. Ralph moans, the sweet sound muffled by her hand, and Jack pauses, looking up at her. 'Don't do that. Lemme hear you sing.' Ralph nods, grips the edge of the desk, watching her as she mouths at her cunt, finger working in and out of her slowly, carefully. She whimpers when another finger is added next to the current one, tugging painfully at Jack's hair.

'That's... This is so good,' She breathes, and Jack grins into her, ignoring the sharp pain at her scalp. 'I shouldn't even... This is wrong.' She whispers, but makes no move to pull away. Instead, she releases her hold on her hair and settles back on her elbows, teeth digging into her lip. Papers rumple under her arms, but Jack is beyond caring at this moment.

'It's not wrong. If it was wrong, you wouldn't be having this much fun. See how wet you are for me, little bird?' She removes her hand, making Ralph whine at the loss, holding her fingers out for inspection for a moment. 'If it was wrong, you'd be on your way to your big house by now.' Ralph nods, resting her hand on her head.

 

The music outside has slowed to a soft strain, the chatter of the patrons louder than anything. Neither of them notice, though.

Ralph has her fist pressed to her mouth again, but Jack doesn't comment, too wrapped up in her task. Too wrapped up in her legs. Ralph's thighs pressed to either side of her head, heels digging into her shoulder, her back.

She's wonderfully sensitive by now, unsure of what an orgasm is but sure that she's had a few. Each time a especially strong wave of pleasure washes over her, making her cry out and arch away from the desk, Jack's pace increases, her eagerness showing through, until it passes and Jack goes back to her original pace, never letting her recover.

'Tell me when it becomes too much.' Jack says, muffled by her _everything_ , but Ralph still nods, unable to form sentences at this point.

 

A few minutes later, just on the brink on what she thinks must be another orgasm, Ralph pushes at her forehead, shaking her head as she lets her legs fall limp, dangling over the edge of the desk. Jack sits back and produces a handkerchief, calmly wiping her mouth. She stands, helps Ralph up.

'You can stay for a bit. Get your bearings.' She murmurs, and the blonde nods, falling into a chair that Jack had kicked away at some point, stiffly bending for her bloomers, pulling them back on and adjusting her dress. She looks wrecked - pink face and messy hair and a crooked dress that she can't quite get straight.

Jack's cigarette had burnt away, now out and almost done, and she sighs, lighting another as she smooths the papers that Ralph had rumpled.

'When are you able to come back?' Ralph stops, almost at the door. She turns back to her.

'Ma'am?'

'To sing. You were good. That reminds me - ' Jack pulls a small wad of cash from a drawer, tosses it to Ralph, who fumbles to catch it. She quickly counts it, biting her lip.

'Um. Friday? The 20th?' Jack nods, turning to her work. Ralph swallows, opens the door. 'Thank you.'

'Leave the door open.'

 

Fifteen minutes later, Ralph passes by the open door, wrapped in fur with a delicate clutch in hand. She pauses, gives her a small, shy wave. Her hair is completely loose now, smoothed and showing no sign of what had occurred a mere twenty minutes before.

Jack sets her pen down and smiles softly.

'Get home safe okay, songbird? Can't have anything happen to my best girl.' Ralph turns bright pink and nods, hurrying past her and out of the club.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> notes lmao  
> a bramley corsele was a corset and bra combo that couldn't been seen under flapper dresses nd such (20's fashion was like,,, super boxy and 'boyish' nd gals wanted flat chests nd like... no curves)


	38. XXXIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some pwp jalger for an anon on me tambles

'Jack, not now!' Ralph's not-so-quiet whisper shakes Roger from sleep, and he blinks blearily into the dark room, 'Roger could wake up.'

'He's a heavy sleeper.' Jack murmurs dismissively, and Roger can just make out the two boys across the room in the poor light. Jack hovers over Ralph, catching most of the moonlight filtering through the curtains with his back. He kisses Ralph quickly, hand sliding between them. Ralph gasps quietly, hips lifting from the mattress.

'Still...'

'If he wakes up, I'll explain. Relax, baby. Let me do this for you.' Ralph sighs in defeat, and he must nod, because Jack kisses him again, a pleased hum leaving him. 'Okay. Sit up.' There's a rustling of sheets, and it takes a few moments, but Jack ends up on his knees in front of Ralph.

Roger can't see much - can't see anything, really. But God, if the noises they make aren't enough. He watches Jack's head bob, listening to the slurping sounds that he somehow makes work. Ralph slaps his hand over his mouth and moans, barely muffled.

'Shh,' Jack murmurs as his hand slides up Ralph's chest, pressing his fingers against his collarbone, 'We don't want to wake Roger, now do we?' Ralph whimpers, hand curling into a fist. Roger imagines him biting down on it in an unsuccessful attempt to hide the noises.

'Keep going,' He whispers, barely heard from where he lay. Jack makes a noncommittal noise in response, and whatever he does next makes Ralph cry out loudly, hand flying to Jack's hair. They both freeze, then look over to Roger. He closes his eyes quickly. The room is still.

'Fuck. He really is a heavy sleeper.' Jack murmurs. Roger waits a few more moments before opening his eyes. It's no longer possible to ignore the hardness between his legs, so he slowly pulls his briefs down and takes his cock in his hand, stroking himself slowly. Ralph curses quietly, lurching over Jack's head as he cradles the back of his skull, fingers pressing into the nape of his neck.

'Shit - don't stop. Please don't - ' Ralph sobs out quietly, the bed creaking as his hips snap up off the mattress. Suddenly, both of them stop cold, and Roger's hand pauses uncertainly. He realizes that he must've made a noise, because Jack sits back on his heels, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand.

'Would you like to join us? Or are you just going to watch?' He asks, never looking away from Ralph as he flicks on the bedside lamp. Roger swallows thickly and sits up, pulling his briefs back up.

'Would it be okay?'

'If it wasn't I wouldn't have asked. Come here.' He stands, standing over them, fists curling at his sides. Jack looks up and him and smiles, leaning over to kiss his thigh. 'Look at how hard you are. Our little voyeur, huh?' Roger's face and neck heats as Ralph kisses his side.

'It's not my fault Ralph makes such nice noises.' He mumbles, and Jack stops, looking up at him in surprise.

'Would you look at that! Roger's gotten mouthy on us, Ralph.' Ralph smiles against his ribs before looking up at him.

'You're a bad influence, Jack.' Roger slowly sits down beside Ralph, and Jack stands, taking his face in his hands and kissing him roughly, possessively.

'Maybe. But I think I like it.' Ralph hums, kissing his shoulder as he tugs his briefs down again - Roger doesn't know why he bothered pulling them back up in the first place.

'Wow. Did I really do that with a couple moans?' He asks him, hand smoothing over the head of his cock. Roger gasps as Jack breaks the kiss to push their foreheads together.

'Yeah. I guess you should be the one to fix it, huh?' Jack laughs and pulls back to watch them. Ralph flushes and leans over to press his lips to his chest, moving down his torso before taking his length into his mouth. Roger bites back a moan as Jack hums appreciatively, pulling over a chair from a desk and stroking himself.

'What a beautiful sight - my two favourite boys,' He murmurs, almost to himself, 'Look at you two. So pretty.' Roger glances up at him, smiling shyly. Jack leans forward pulls him into a kiss, free hand resting on Ralph's head.

'I can help you with that.' Roger whispers when they break, eyes flicking to his erection. Jack smiles and kisses the corner of his mouth before sitting back, shaking his head.

'No. I just want you to sit back and let Ralph do that for you.' Ralph glances up at them, raising his brows. 'He did get you all worked up. It's only fair, if you ask me.' Roger shifts and nods, glancing down at Ralph. He lets his mouth fall open in a soft moan as he grabs at his hair, pressing his forehead into his shoulder. Ralph hollows his cheeks around his length and bobs his head in earnest, pressing his hand into his thigh. Jack stops his own movements, and instead takes in the picture before him with a fond smile.

After a moment, he moves to sit on the other side of Roger, leaning in and kissing his neck, then biting and sucking at the dark skin, reaching for Ralph's hand. Roger lets his head fall back, groaning quietly and bracing the back of his head. Ralph pulls back to take his length in his hand, kissing his stomach as he watches them. Roger doubles over, detaching Jack in the process, and cries out, gripping at Jack's shoulder as his climax draws close. Jack kisses his back and smiles, rubbing his thigh encouragingly.

'That's it, pet,' He murmurs, resting his chin on his shoulder, 'You gonna come all over Ralph's pretty face?' Roger whimpers, blunt nails pressing into his skin. Ralph positions himself so he can avoid the worst of the spill, gaze finding Roger's.

'I've got you, Roger. It's all good - do what you need to do, baby.' He whispers, as if it was only them in the room at that moment. Roger nods, turning his face into Jack's cheek, choking out a moan. His hips twitch off the bed in quick, uneven thrusts into Ralph's hand, and Ralph smiles patiently, kissing his stomach. 'That's it, baby, keep going. I've got you.' He murmurs, rubbing up his torso.

'So perfect.' Jack whispers against his cheek, watching Ralph closely. 'You're both so perfect.' Roger cries out at his words, spilling into Ralph's hand. He glances down at Ralph as he strokes him down, looking up at him like he's his whole world. He pulls away and wipes his hand on the sheets before climbing up and pulling him into a kiss.

'You're so sweet.' He murmurs, straddling him and tugging playfully at his earlobe. Jack leans forward and kisses his shoulder, drawing Ralph's attention back to him. 'And I believe you and I were in the middle of something, before Roger joined us.' Jack grins, tugging him from Roger's lap into his own.

'You want me to keep sucking you off, pretty boy?' Ralph shakes his head, running his fingertips along his jaw.

'I need more than that right now.'

 

Ralph and Jack look beautiful together. They always do. Roger sits cross-legged by them, watching with interest. Jack holds Ralph close, face buried into his neck, fingers pressing into his back and shoulder. He moves in him slowly, murmuring sweet nothings into his neck. Ralph is moaning quietly, grabbing at his elbow and moving back to meet him. He turns his face towards Roger, giving him a loose, happy smile.

'C'mere, baby.' He whispers, and Jack pauses, looking up and humming, kissing his forehead. Roger scoots closer and takes his hand. 'What're you thinking about?'

'You're so beautiful. Both of you are just... Gorgeous.' He says weakly. Ralph beams and pulls him into a kiss, moving against Jack. Jack starts moving again, grabbing at Ralph's hips and pulling him forward, fingers sinking into his skin. Ralph grabs at his shoulder and moans needily, hips moving to meet his thrusts at a desperate pace. When Roger leans in, brushing his lips over his shoulder, he grabs at the back of his head, pressing his cheek into his hair. Roger shifts to push his face into his neck, kissing him gently.

'Roger,' Ralph whispers, fingers curling into his hair, pulling painfully.

'What is it?'

'I need you,'

'You have Merridew.' Ralph whines, taking his hand and pulling it into the space between his and Jack's body, pressing his palm to his length.

'I need both of you.'

'Greedy boy.' Jack pipes in, pulling Ralph closer. Ralph moans again when his hips snap up into him suddenly, and Jack nods to Roger, who starts stroking Ralph, wishing he was at a better angle.

'Why have two boyfriends if I'm only getting fucked by one at a time?' Ralph whispers hoarsely in response, seemingly torn between grinding against Jack and moving his hips against Roger's hand.

'There's an idea.' Jack whispers, and Ralph laughs, shaking his head.

'Fuck no. I do not intend to have two cocks in me at once.' Jack gently pushes Roger's hand away to lie Ralph down, lifting his hips and pushing into him quickly.

'That's not what I meant, baby boy. Think of this - next time we fuck, we get you on your hands and knees. Or your back. One of us gets to be where I am, right now, and the other gets to fuck your perfect, wonderful throat.' Ralph flushes, tilting his head back when Jack presses his hand to his throat gently. 'How does that sound, baby?' Ralph nods as best he can, and Jack lets go of his throat to lift his hips higher into the air, thrusting into him with hard, even strokes. Roger shifts forward again, running his hand down his body.

'Roger,' He murmurs, reaching for his wrist, pushing it to his cock. Roger hums and presses his palm against his length, moving slowly. Jack's fingers press into his thighs as he increases the speed, clearly doing nothing but chasing his own orgasm.

'Fuck,' He hisses, watching as Roger starts stroking Ralph slowly, 'Fuck, baby, I'm so fucking close.' Ralph pulls him down to push their foreheads together, hands pressing over his.

'You gonna come in me, baby?' He whispers, and Jack curses again, meeting his eyes, one hand moving to press over Roger's.

'Yeah, I'll do that. You want me to?'

'Fuck yes,' Ralph murmurs, hips moving quickly to meet his thrusts. 'Please, baby, I need you.'

'You have me,' Jack groans loudly as he stops, suddenly tipping over that sharp edge and falling against Ralph as he climaxes. Ralph pushes his hair from his face and kisses his cheekbones.

'There you go, baby. That's it. I love you so much.' He whispers, and Jack shudders as he pulls away, pumping the last of himself onto Ralph's stomach. He looks to Roger as he catches his breath.

'Stop torturing him, and just get it over with.'

 

Ralph sits up against Roger's chest, spread out for Jack to watch from the other end.

'Fuck, you're so beautiful like that.' Ralph looks up at him through his lashes, moaning loudly. 'I wish I could take a picture of you two so I can show you.' Roger kisses Ralph's neck and runs his thumb over the head of his cock, murmuring praise and encouragement in his ear, sweet nothings meant only for him. Ralph closes his eye and tilts his head back to his shoulder, breathing quick and heavy.

'I'm close.' He murmurs, reaching for Roger's other hand, gripping tightly. Roger smiles and bites at Ralph's neck, making him cry out and arch off of his lap, spilling over his hand with a sob. Roger pulls him back down, holding him against his chest as he strokes him down, murmuring comforting things against the bite mark he left.

When he calms down, Ralph rolls off his lap and drops back to the pillows, holding his arms out. Jack crawls up beside him and pulls both of the smaller boys against his chest, kissing each of their foreheads in turn.

'You were so beautiful together.' He whispers, fingers tightening around their shoulders possessively. Ralph smiles blissfully and pushes his cheek into Jack's chest.

'I think it was just Ralph. He could fuck anything and still look gorgeous doing it.'

'Suck ups.' He murmurs sleepily, running his fingers up Roger's bicep. Jack kisses his forehead again and rubs his back soothingly. A silence descends over them as they doze together in the afterglow.

'Can I tell you something?' Roger mumbles sleepily, breaking the silence. Jack grunts in a noncommittal answer. 'I love you two.'


	39. XXXIV

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> warnings : rough sex, blood, blood kink (?), weapons, mentions and thoughts of murder.
> 
> they're just... a couple of fucked up gals

Ralph must be the prettiest girl that Jack has ever fucked.

 

She's got her pinned to the mattress, slender digits wrapped tight 'round her graceful throat. Her other hand is buried in her, three fingers deep in her cunt.

Blood smears across her tanned skin, but it only makes her all the more attractive, bruised and bloodied and ruined, all because of her.

Both hands are fixed around her wrist as she moans, hips pushing up up up against her cruel fingers. She begs with her eyes, tawny brown and tear-filled, long doll lashes heavy and thick with tears.

'Please,' She chokes out, and Jack presses the heel of her hand to her windpipe. She imagines crushing, crushing, crushing, her hands slippery with her blood, hair tangled between her blood-slick fingers.

'Please what, beautiful girl?' Her knee finds the soft part of her stomach, pushing until she gives a loud cry, thumbs digging at her pulse point. The cry is cut off by the heel of her hand pressing into her windpipe again, and her mouth.

The kiss is angry and harsh, clacking teeth and lips bit at 'til they bleed. Jack breaks back and sucks at Ralph's bottom lip, thumb pressing relentlessly against her clit.

'Please _what_ , whore?' She hisses.

'Please. Fuck me, please, please, _please_ , I need it.' Jack releases her throat, and Ralph takes advantage of the unrestricted airflow, gasping and coughing, pink lips spread wide.

'Fuck you with what?' She admires the bloody handprint left on her throat - she knew that when that blood was washed away, a purpling one would be left in it's place.

'Anything. Anything.' She pulls her other hand away and climbs off the bed, leaving the blonde cold and alone and streaked with someone else's blood. Jack thinks about how good it would be, to see Ralph's own blood spread over her skin. Throat slit, tits soaked, body limp and lifeless and so beautiful. A beauty that only death could bring - there was a certain quality about life that dulled things, even exquisite things like the girl spread out under her now.

'Anything? Even the baseball bat that I used to beat your boyfriend's head in?' Ralph moans, spreads her legs for her, lets her see her cunt, pink and glistening and heartbreakingly empty. Jack steps over and tweaks a nipple until she sobs, then repeats the action on the other. 'Are you that fucking desperate to be fucked?' Ralph nods quickly, desperately, hips arching off the bed.

Admittedly, Jack does want to bury her face in her cunt - wants to stay between her thighs forever. She craves the taste of her more than she craves the split of her skin, the spill of her blood, sweet and rich and red red red, endless red.

She sits down on the edge of the bed again, hand running down her stomach. She pauses there - her skin is a perfect shade of golden from hours spent under the sun. Even the tan lines around her tits and her arse look good on her. That was the only downside about ending Ralph's life - her skin would go clammy and pale, then eventually rot away, claimed by the maggots and wet dirt of a shallow grave. There are moles scattered over her stomach, too. Over her whole body - Jack needs to remember to trace over them at one point. Preferably with her favourite knife.

Only the best for the best, after all.

'Jack,' Ralph breathes, snapping her thoughts away from the future. Her lips are parted, pink and kisses-swollen, bloody and bruised from being bitten. Her lips were her favourite part of her. And another part of her that the worms would claim.

'You need your greedy cunt filled, huh? You desperate for it, baby girl?' Ralph bites her abused lip and nods, giving her a pleading face. 'Well, who am I to deny you, beautiful?' Her hand drifts down her stomach to press over her cunt. She could feel the wetness already, sliding over her palm. It doesn't take much to slide her finger into her, then back out again, creating a lazy, even rythym. Ralph's eyes flutter shut, and she gives an appreciative hum.

'You want more, baby girl?' Ralph nods, not moving. Jack had to applaud her will power - it was strong, when she wanted it to be. As a reward, she eases her pointer finger in. Ralph breath hitches and her fingers curl into the sheets below her, but she gives no other sign of noticing the addition.

'Thank you,' She whispers as Jack bends to press an uncharacteristically sweet kiss to her bloodied throat. Jack adds another finger, then twists her hand to press the ball of her thumb against her clit.

'Can you take the whole hand?' She asks quietly, and Ralph nods, eyes flying open. 'Thumb in? Or on your clit?'

'Clit. Please.' Jack moves to run the tip of her tongue around a nipple, instantly perking it back up again. She pays attention to her tits as she eases her pinky in to nestle all four fingers in her cunt, feeling her pulse and squeeze around her.

'God, I love your tits so much.' She whispers, sucking at one until the areola is bruised and Ralph winces when she eases her fingertip over the spit-slicked skin. 'They're such a great size. And they're so _nice_  - I just want to bite at them. Make you scream some.' Ralph shifts her hips, and it doesn't go unnoticed. Jack smiles and moves to the unattended breast, starting to move her hand slowly. Ralph curses under her breath, grabbing at her shoulder.

'I'll be too sensitive to wear a - _fucking hell_ \- bra for the next few days.' Ralph tries to take on an annoyed tone, but it just comes out breathless and desperate.

'Who says you'll need one?' Ralph stops squirming, going shock-still. Jack becomes unrelenting in the movement of her hand. 'I fully intend to keep you tied to this bed. I'll fuck you until you can't walk, can't stand being touched. Even looked at would make you come. And then? I'd fuck you some more.' Ralph whimpers, but it goes unheard under the slick sound of Jack's hand working in and out of her roughly. She grinds her thumb into her clit cruelly. Ralph sobs out, hips lifting from the bed, the heels of her feet scrabbling at the sheets.

'Oh, God, I'm so close. I'm so close, please, can I? Can I come?'

'Come all you want, baby girl. I ain't stopping you.' Ralph immediately throws her head back and screams, arching off the bed. The sound brings shivers down her spine and warmth to her cunt.

 

Once she's caught her breath, Ralph attempts to push her hand away.

'Too much.'

'Too bad. I meant what I said.' Ralph whines in discomfort and becomes more insistent in the push, thighs closing over her hand. Jack sighs and pulls it free, wiping it clean. Ralph flops back and closes her eyes, basking in the afterglow of a good fuck.

She looks positively fucked out. She looks positively ravishingf, streaked in her now-dead boyfriend's blood and unperturbed by it, body bruised and bitten and over-sensitive. Her face is fresh and covered in a thin sheen of sweat, her lips pressed together. Although the colour red looks great on her, Jack decides right then and there that urges be damned. She wouldn't kill her, wouldn't bring that wonderful knife to her wonderful throat and split open that beautifully tanned skin, watch the blood pour.

She would keep her in beds like these, in shit motels, streaked in other people's blood and fucked-out. Ralph would be hers. Not the worms'.

 

She gets up and goes into the bathroom, taking off her bloodsoaked shirt and tossing it into the bathtub before scrubbing her hands until they're pink.

Ralph watches her as she comes over with a wet handtowel, climbing back on top of her.

'You're so beautiful.' Jack whispers, wiping it over her forehead, across her cheeks and lips. Ralph smiles blissfully, baring her throat to allow her to wipe away the blood. It isn't fully dried yet, tacky and clinging to her bruising skin when Jack brings the towel over the column of her neck. 'So, so beautiful.'

Once she's cleaned, and Jack has washed the blood from everything else, Jack climbs back into bed beside her, drawing her close.

'You didn't come.' Ralph whispers into the dark room, hand nestling between her thighs.

'God, you're so good to me. I don't need to, you know.' Still, she makes no move to stop her when her fingers work past the waistband of her bottoms and Ralph fits herself against her side.

 

The smell of sex lingers heavy in the air as Ralph rolls over onto her stomach, draping herself over Jack and pushing her face into her neck. Jack hums, pushing the covers down to their waists to run her fingers over her back, noticing how the skin remained unmarred by the night's events.

'There are so many things I want to do to you, beautiful girl.' Ralph hums against her neck and pushes closer.

'Like?'

'I want to tie you to this bed. Or another bed. Maybe all the beds we stay in.' Jack takes her wrists in her hands and grips tightly,holding them against Ralph's stomach. 'I want to push you to a wall and make you scream until you lose your voice.' Ralph whimpers when she releases her wrists, rolling onto her back. Jack climbs over her and looks into her eyes in the low light.

'Is that it?'

'I just want to hear you come. Feel you come. Over and over, all for me.'

'All for you,' Ralph repeats softly, pulling her down into a lingering kiss.

'And I want to stay with you. I want to go somewhere, leave our lives behind. Start fresh.' Ralph smiles, a flash of white teeth in the darkness, and she nods, pulling her into another, quicker kiss.

'I want that, too. I don't care what you do.' Her arm slings across her neck and she pulls her down to push her face to her clavicle.

 

Everything would turn out okay, she could tell. Everything would be fine, as long as she had Ralph.

 


	40. XXXV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired by [this post](http://coffeegrease.tumblr.com/post/164458541981/jalph) made by [a cool gal](https://coffeegrease.tumblr.com)
> 
> they r american for story purposes
> 
> (ik that the eclipse is an old meme by now but i couldn't help myself)

**_Wanna come over tmmrw?_ **

The message comes just as Ralph is dropping off to sleep, so he groans and rolls over, closing an eye when the bright screen of his iPhone momentarily blinds him. He rubs at his eyes before sending a quick reply.

**Why? To watch the eclipse?**

_**What?**_  
**_No, fuck that. I want your ass._**

Ralph flushes bright and bites his thumb, suppressing a smile.

**_What do you think of that?_ **

**We're in the path of totality, y'know.**

**_So?_ **  
**_Listen, if you don't wanna come over, have fun staring at the sky with Charles_ **  
**_Just know that you're gonna miss the fuck of your life if you do._ **

**_Ralph?_ **  
**_Yes or no?_ **

Ralph presses his lips together in a thin line and waits a few minutes, just to drive Jack mad.

**Okay.**

 

-xXx-

 

Jack must be waiting right at the door, because Ralph barely knocks before the door is opened and Jack is pulling him into a kiss, fingers burying in his hair. Ralph hums as he drags him over the threshold, pushing the door closed with his foot.

'Hey, hot stuff.' Jack murmurs, pushing him up to the door, mouthing at his neck. Ralph rests his cheek on the top of his head and tugs him close. Passersby and neighbors could definitely see them through the panes of frosted glass in the door, but Ralph is beyond caring.

'Take me upstairs?'

'Always.' Jack all but growls the word, grabbing his hips and hoisting him up as he bites at his clavicle. Ralph gasps and wraps his arms around his neck, legs around his waist, glancing between them as Jack starts walking. Jack places a hand on his rear, fingers pushing into the flesh, to support him. He never looks away from him.

Jack lowers Ralph onto the bed, then straightens to take off his shirt. Ralph lifts onto his elbows, doing the same, then quickly working his shorts off. Jack stops to look over the blond in appreciation, biting his lip.

'I don't need the eclipse when I've got a view like this,' He murmurs, and Ralph presses his lips together, shifting in the bed to get into a more comfortable position. 'There's just one thing...' Jack bends over the end of the bed and pulls Ralph's briefs down, kissing the top of his thigh.

'Better?' Ralph whispers, cheeks darkening.

'Much.' Jack straightens up and takes off his jeans, his briefs. Ralph sits up to meet him, grasping his hips and kissing along his hipbones.

'You want me to give you head?' Jack swallows thickly and bites his lip, his cock already stiffening. Ralph notices and smiles into the hollow of his hipbone. 'Or, do you want to fuck my mouth? I'd let you.' He looks up at him through his lashes and Jack pushes his fingers through his hair. After a lapse of silence, Ralph leans down and kisses the skin just above Jack's length, breath warm on his shaft. Jack's breath hitches, his cock stirring in interest at the attention.  Ralph's eyes move up find his and he smiles fondly again, fingers smoothing over his thighs.

'Ralph,' He murmurs, and Ralph nods, fingers tracking up over his hips, his ribs, then across his chest to run over his stomach.

'I know, baby,' He mouths at the part of skin he's focusing on, 'Don't worry,' Ralph brushes his fingers over his hipbones, and Jack lifts his hips off the bed. Ralph grins and braces his arm across the small of his back, pulling him against his mouth. Jack grips his hair and tugs at his handful, _hard_.

 

'Come back up here.' Jack murmurs, 'If you use your mouth, I'd come right off the bat. Wanna fuck you.' He tugs at his hair again, and Ralph looks up at him, raising his brows. Jack's hands travel to his cheeks, thumbs smoothing along his cheekbones. Ralph gives in and presses a quick kiss to the head of his cock before climbing up to kiss his chin, his nose.

'I would've looked great with your cock in my - ' He gasps when Jack grips his hips suddenly, flipping them to push him to the mattress.

'You would look great doing anything,' He murmurs, flat teeth pressing over his pulse, 'Especially if you're all fucked out.' Ralph laughs breathlessly, fingers curling into his shoulders.

'You wanna do that for me? Get me all fucked out?' Jack pauses and glances up at him, then grins wide and snakes his hand between his legs, pressing his palm into his hardening cock.

'You want me to do that, baby boy?'

'That's why I came over, wasn't it?' Jack stops and pulls back, laughing loudly.

'Fuck, baby,' He shakes his head and threads his fingers through his hair, pulling him into a hard kiss, 'I love you so fuckin' much.' He grabs at his hips and pulls him up with him, arms wrapping around his hips and across his back, drawing him in close. Ralph grabs the back of his neck and drags him back down.

'Get the lube.' He whispers into the kiss, pulling him closer still. Jack blindly feels along his bedside table, opening the drawer and fumbling through it, never breaking the kiss. He finds the bottle and awkwardly opens it. Ralph pulls back his hips enough that Jack can spread some over his entrance, fingers working into him. Ralph groans at the stretch when Jack pushes two fingers in at once without warning. Jack rubs his hip soothingly, murmuring reassurance into his mouth.

'That's it,' He murmurs, finally breaking the kiss. His free hand goes to his forehead, pushing his bangs from his face, 'That's it, baby, I know you can take it.' He crooks his fingers and pull them open, making Ralph moan and push his forehead into his neck. 'You're so good for me,' He croons, mouthing against his temple, pulling his fingers out.

'Jack,' Ralph whispers, reaching between them to grab his wrist, 'Don't. It feels...'

'You know my cock will feel better,' Jack sits back, brushing Ralph's reaching hands away and spreading more lube over his shaft. Ralph lies back and arches off the mattress, biting his lip. Jack stops and takes hold of his chin, hand dropping to his chest, over his heart.

'Who needs the eclipse when I've got a view like this?' He says it to himself, but Ralph can still hear him perfectly. He smiles despite the flush climbing up his neck, setting his feet apart and swaying his hips invitingly. Jack grins and grabs at his waist, dragging him up so their hips press flush together. He eases into him, and a moan sounds in Ralph's chest. His fingers sink into his hair, pulling him down.

Jack's lips find his ear, teeth meeting his earlobe.

'God, you always feel so good.' He groans into his ear, quiet and meant only for him. Ralph whimpers and pushes his cheek to his, fingers curling tight over his shoulder blades. Jack's hand braces the back of his skull, holding him against his chest as he moves in him lazily. Ralph presses his lips to his shoulders and breathes in sharply as Jack's fingers curl loosely around his cock. He whispers his name, and Jack pulls him closer, leaning down over the bed. His movements increase in tempo and roughness, and Ralph says his name again, louder this time. Jack hums in reply, his free hand wandering up his side, smoothing over his ribs lazily, softly.

'I love you.' Ralph whispers, and Jack says it back without hesitation, pushing forward. 'I love you so fucking much, Jack, _ah_ \- ' Jack's hand becomes a more solid presence between them, pressing over the head of his cock, making Ralph cry out, 'Please don't stop, baby, _please_ \- ' Jack pushes forward suddenly, and Ralph lurches into the headboard, reaching back to brace himself against it.

'Don't worry, I won't.' Jack whispers, grabbing his knees, pushing them up to his chest. 'I won't stop unless you want me to.' Ralph whines at the loss of contact on his cock, reaching down to replace it with his own hand, stroking himself too fast, too sloppily. Jack kisses him gently, rocking into him at a steady pace.

'I'm - I'm so close, please - faster? Harder? Something - I just need something _more_.' Jack does as he's asked, rocking so hard against him that the bed frame collides with the wall. Jack reaches up to push his hand to the wall, gain more leverage, pressing quick kisses along his forehead. His other hand goes back between them, laying over his hand.

'How close are you, baby?' He whispers, mouthing at his jaw. 'Wanna make you feel good.'

'Really - fuck, _really_ close.' Ralph pushes his face into his neck, moans loudly. He goes quiet next, breathy moans the only noise coming from him. Usually, this would concern Jack - especially with the knowledge of how vocal Ralph could get. But he knew that this was what happened just before he came. He kisses his temple, murmuring praise into his skin.

'I know, baby, I'm here. I'll take care of you,' He breathes, 'You just let go. Lemme hear you.' Always eager to please, Ralph lurches into their joined hands, coming with a loud cry. Jack stops his movements, stroking him slowly until Ralph pushes his hands away, flopping back onto the bed. Jack pulls out and hurriedly strokes himself, chasing his orgasm.

Ralph watches, arm slung over his forehead, smiling lazily as he takes in the image before him. Jack's eyes find his and he spills onto his chest with a groan of his name, then he tumbles off him to lie beside him, pulling him into his arms.

'I love you.' He whispers. Ralph smiles as the room darkens, and his face lights up. He pulls from Jack's arms and tumbles to the floor, rushing to the window. Jack turns over and watches as Ralph grins, pushing the curtains open, grinning up at the sky. He props himself up on the pillows and smiles. 'You'll blind yourself.'

'It's worth it.' He glances over at Jack, and smiles back, leaning forward on the window sill. It's then that Jack decides that this, naked and half-hidden by his curtains, smiling in child-like wonder, is the most beautiful Ralph has ever been.


	41. XXXVI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they in space, they gay  
> gays in space

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> u know in the sims how u can woohoo in a rocket ship... ya
> 
> this came out??? so gross and fluffy???? brush yo teeth after reading this. im not responsible for ur cavities

He comes to him past curfew, as always. A sharp rap on the door, then the abuse of his all-access key card. The door to his cabin beeps, then slides open, the overhead lights immediately blaring on. Jack winces, blinking in the sharp light, and Ralph sighs, sitting up in bed.

'Were you sleeping? I could leave.' He says, voice a hoarse whisper as he glances into the hallway nervously. He's still in his uniform, having just come from duty.

'No. Come here.' Ralph falls back onto the pillow, pushing his face away from the light. The door slides shut behind Jack as he struggles out of the form fitting uniform, stopping to fold it carefully before crawling into bed beside Ralph.

'Sorry I'm so late.' He murmurs as Ralph turns into him, reaching over to fumble with the remote for the lights. The blond hums, kissing his cheek clumsily, plunging them into darkness when he turns off the lights.

'Thought you weren't going to show.' Even though he's whispering, Ralph's voice still seems too loud in the pitch dark.

'Can I make it up to you?'

'You can shut up and let me sleep.' Ralph's voice comes quieter now, and Jack smiles, kissing his ear.

'Lemme tell you something first,' Ralph rolls away and groans, pushing at his shoulder.

'If you aren't going to sleep, just go.'

'I was going to take you somewhere tonight,' Ralph pauses, then pulls him down over him, pressing his face into his neck, 'I was gonna take a shuttle, take you out of the station.' Ralph hums, fingers running down his bare back.

'That's a serious infraction, y'know,' He murmurs, 'It'd cost you your job if you got caught,'

'You're worth it, baby.' Jack runs his hand over his hair, 'I would've fucked you among the stars, pretty boy.' Ralph mumbles something unintelligible into his hair, holding him flush to his front.

'Fucking me comes later. Sleep.' He whispers, voice thick and tired, and Jack smiles into his neck, rubbing his fingers across his scalp. He rolls over onto his side, bringing him along, kissing his jaw gently. Ralph pushes at his chest gently, moving away from his lips. 'Sleep.'

 

Ralph falls back asleep quickly, his breaths evening out, arms going slack around him. Jack nuzzles into his neck and traces his finger over his back, waiting for his warmth to chase away the cold that plagued the station, waiting to sink into sleep.

It comes sooner than expected.

 

He wakes up with his face pressed to a pillow instead of Ralph's neck. Fingers map over his back in a slow drag that makes him shiver, arcing over with a certainty and familiarity with his body that, if he didn't know the way Ralph's hands felt, would've told him plenty. He rolls over to find Ralph already dressed in his Academy uniform, smiling down at him. 

'I memorized your schedule for this cycle. I set the alarm for you - go back to sleep.' Jack pulls him down into a quick kiss, hands in his hair.

'Come to my stationing five minutes before my shift ends. I want to take you out tonight.' Ralph bites his lip as he pulls away, straightening his top.

'Try not to miss me too much, handsome.' He murmurs, grabbing his book bag. Jack sits up in bed to watch him pull his shoes on.

'Impossible.' Ralph wrinkles his nose at him as he pushes the code on the panel by the door, never turning away as he walks out into the hall.

'Love you.' He says as the door slides shut, and Jack turns away and falls back onto the pillow to hide his ridiculously wide grin.

 

Just as they agreed, Ralph wanders into his station five minutes before his shift ends. He looks fresh from the shower, cheeks pink and hair damp, his clothes clean and new.

'Hey, handsome.' Ralph calls, biting his nail. Jack straightens up, lowering his standard issue rifle from where it rested on his shoulder.

'I can't believe you memorized my schedule for the entire cycle. Even I don't do that.' Ralph closes the distance between them, wrapping his arms around his neck and kissing him long and hard.

'i just like knowing when I'll get to see you.' He kisses him again, and Jack moves to pull back, hand in his hair.

'Distracting an on-duty officer is a serious infraction, y'know.' He murmurs, bending his head to kiss his jaw.

'Are you going to punish me, Officer?' Ralph sits on the edge of the console, giggling when Jack bites at his neck.

'You wish.' Jack growls playfully, and his partner, Roger, scoffs, looking into the cosmos.

'Get a cabin.' He mutters as a group of men march onto the deck.

'Merridew,' Jack looks up and straighten, raising his rifle again, 'Ralph. You know you aren't supposed to be here.' Ralph smiles sweetly at his father, pulling a knee to his chest and resting his cheek on his knee.

'Oh, I know. I just missed Officer Merridew _so_ terribly.'

'You can see your boyfriend in... Three minutes.'

'Exactly. Three minutes. Just bend the rules just this once, Dad?' The man sighs and glances to the other officers, then nods once.

'You're too spoiled.' Jack mutters, and Ralph turns his sweet smile to him as the group of men leave.

'Don't act all innocent, Mr. I'm Taking You Out Of The Station Just To Fuck You In A Romantic Way.' Jack rolls his eyes and turns back to the hall. 'You know I like stuff like that, and you want to give me the best. I get that.'

'Infractions, Gornick. You're committing a whole station of them right now.'

'Confine me then, Officer.' Jack rests his rifle against his shoulder and leans on the wall, back to Ralph. Roger stands beside him, murmurs something in his ear that Ralph doesn't catch. Ralph frowns, supporting his weight on his hands and leaning back, swinging his legs idly as he stares out the window at the stars.

Moments later, Jack places his hands on his calves, kissing his throat. Ralph looks back at him, smiling when he sees Roger turn the corner, two new officers replacing them.

'C'mon. Let's go.' Jack murmurs, kissing his hair. Ralph bites his lip and hops down from the console, taking his hand and pulling him past the officers quickly.  
Once they turn the corner, Jack presses him to the wall, kissing his throat.

'I'll take you out, baby. As soon as curfew comes around, we'll go.'

'Breaking curfew  _and_ stealing? My father'll throw you out the airlock.' Ralph smiles adoringly at Jack, who pushes his hair from his face and kisses his forehead.

'We'll talk about my early death if we come to it.'

'Curfew isn't for hours, y'know.' Ralph's breath hitches as his feet leave the ground, Jack lifting him easily.

'I'm sure we can find something to do,' Jack's fingers brush over his hips, mouth going to his ear, 'So? Should we take Roger's advice? Go to your cabin?' Ralph bites his lip to suppress a giggle, fingers easing through Jack's hair.

'You know the way.'

 

Jack presses Ralph up to the door frame, fumbling through his uniform pocket and pulling out his key card. The door beeps, slides open, and the lights blare on. Ralph kisses him as he carries him over the threshold, staggering under his weight.

'I want to save our energy,' He sinks onto the edge of the bed. Ralph adjusts himself in his lap, kissing his forehead gently.

'I get it. We can just...' He pushes him back, curling into him, '... exist. For a bit.' Jack rests his cheek in his hair and nods, pulling him close.

'Love you.'

'I know.'

 

The outside lights of the ship dim, and Ralph lifts his head from Jack's chest, blinking the daze away. Jack's hand stops trailing across his back, tightening in his shirt.

'Let's go steal a ship.' Jack whispers, craning his neck to check the clock on Ralph's wall.

 

They walk briskly to the hangar, hand in hand.

'You look suspicious.' Ralph hisses when Jack glances over his shoulder for the third time that minute. Jack frowns down at him.

'And I thought I was the more impure of the two of us,' Ralph winks and pulls him forward, reaching the door. He uses his own keycard, in case they tracked the uses. Jack lets go of his hand and heads to the smallest shuttle, heaving the door open. He holds his hand out for Ralph to pull himself up into the cock pit.

Even for the smallest ship, the cock pit is still spacious enough for Ralph to move around, stretch out, and even lie down.

'Do you even know how to fly these things?' He realizes when Jack closes the door and sinks into the pilot's seat. Jack pulls a helmet on, seemingly out of habit, and rolls his eyes.

'Yes, I know how to fly these things. We learn in Training. I was at the top of my class in all schooling, y'know. That's why your father lets me date you and stay on the squad. Sit down, please. And buckle up.'

'He doesn't let you date me. I let you.' Ralph drops into the other seat, leaning back after buckling his safety belt.

'I know,' Jack pushes some buttons and turns a key, never looking away from his work, 'You're a spoiled little brat with both me and your father twisted around your little finger.'

'And you love it.' Ralph kisses his cheek quickly before darting back to place before he yelled at him.

'No. I just love you. And that means putting up with your bullshit. Hold on.' The docking bay opens wide and they dart into movement, shooting out into open space. Ralph's stomach drops as the bay door closes behind them, bringing with its closure the realization that they were free floating in space right now. Jack glances at his face, a grin splitting his features. 'I put up with your bullshit for moments like this, beautiful boy. If you could see your face...'

'Just - take me to wherever you were gonna take me.' He grits out, slowly relaxing in his seat.

'You're beautiful, Ralph.' Jack murmurs, reaching across to touch his face before pushing the shuttle into motion. Ralph gasps at the sudden jerk, grabbing for the nearest solid object as he stiffens again.

'Better be worth it.' He hisses, screwing his eyes shut.

 

He doesn't know how long they fly for, but Jack rests his hand on his knee, voice soft by his ear.

'You can unbuckle now. We're here.' Ralph opens an eye, then leans forward in his seat.

'How far out are we?'

'Far enough to let it be only us out here.'

'There isn't anything out here. Just stars.'

'You're the real view here.' Ralph gives him a look as he unlatches his seat belt and stands, peering out of the window. Jack steps up behind him and kisses his shoulder, pulling him close. 'Tell me what's on that mind of yours, beautiful.'

'A lot.'

'Like?'

Silence settles over them as Ralph struggles to simplify his thoughts into words.

'I always... Found stars so cold. Beautiful, but cold. But out here... It's like... Being alone with you is where I was meant to be. I feel more at home out here than I ever have... On that tin can.' Jack pauses, then smiles hesitantly.

'I get it.' Ralph suddenly turns in his arms.

'Take me. Make love to me.' Jack flushes at his choice of words, hands travelling to his hips.

'Since when do we call it that?'

'Since now. Make love to me, Jack.' He repeats, and Jack clears his throat, taking off his uniform slowly. Ralph drops into the pilot's chair, suppressing a smile by biting his lip as he watches him undress.

Once he's naked, Jack drops to his knees, pulling Ralph's shirt over his head slowly. He rolls the cotton up in his hands, gathering it under his arms. Ralph pulls his arms free, ducking out of the shirt. Jack kisses him, slow and languid, dropping the shirt to the floor. His hands slide up his ribs, rough palms scraping over his sensitive skin and making him shiver.

'You are,' Jack pulls back and runs his thumb across his bottom lip, 'So amazing.'

'You should talk.' Ralph murmurs, meeting his gaze, 'I mean - you brought me all the way out here, risking... _Everything_ to do it, and you're being so gentle. You're too good to me, Jack.'

'You deserve all of it. And more.'

'I don't want more,' Ralph pulls Jack down, kissing him again, 'I just want you. And right now? I want you inside me.' He whispers, pushing their foreheads together. Jack hums, bracing his hands on either side of his neck and rubbing his thumbs over his pulse.

'How do you want it?'

'Here - ' Ralph gets up, pulling Jack with him, ' - Sit down. Lemme do the work this time.' Jack raises his brows but doesn't object when Ralph presses him down into the seat, sitting forward to help him remove his trousers and briefs. Ralph sinks to his knees, taking his half-hard cock into his hand, stroking him lazily. Jack hums softly, resting his arms on the arm rests. Ralph leans forward, kissing the head before smiling up at him.

'I think this is your best angle.' He whispers, rubbing his free hand over his thigh in soothing motions. 'I love seeing you like this. How flustered can I get you, do you think?' Jack mumbles something in response, biting his lip. Ralph's smile widens as his strokes become more insistent, and he starts sucking at the head of his cock. Jack moans quietly and moves his hips up and away from his mouth, forcing Ralph to press him back to the seat.

'I think it'd be best if you don't tease.' Jack whispers, already starting to get breathless.

'That takes all the fun out of it, baby.' Ralph laughs quietly as he strokes him at a steady pace, kissing along his length. Jack huffs out a sigh and slumps back.

'Please, baby boy?' He murmurs, and Ralph kisses the junction of his thigh.

'Please what?'

'Just - I need your mouth. Around my cock.' He says bluntly, and Ralph blinks, caught off-guard by said bluntness. He laughs, sitting back to push his hair behind his ears.

'Is that so?' He reaches out, wrapping his hand around his shaft, clearly not teasing anymore. Jack sighs in relief as he moves closer again, taking him into his mouth, sucking at him with new intent.

'Fuck - that's more like it.' He whispers, cradling the back of his head with careful gentleness. Ralph reaches up with his free hand, grabbing his wrist for no reason other than to hold him, his lips tight around the head of his cock. He drops his other hand to his thigh as he takes the rest of Jack in his mouth, bobbing his head slowly. His eyes find Jack's, and they crinkle in a smile when Jack curses quietly.

Jack grabs for his other hand when the head of his cock hits the back of his throat, making him cough.

'Sorry,' He whispers, and Ralph blinks up at him, giving him a thumbs up as he continues bobbing his head. Jack flushes and pushes his hair back behind his ears for him.

  
Ralph pulls back to suckle at the head of his cock, drawing moans and curses from him. Jack presses his fist to his front teeth, resisting the urge to buck his hips up into his mouth.

'I'm close, baby,' He chokes out, and Ralph immediately pulls back, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. He sits back on his heels to take him in.

'I think I see why you always want me needy and desperate.' He murmurs after a moment, and Jack lowers his fist, brows drawing together. 'You're beautiful.' Immediately, Jack darkens and looks away, coughing.

'No 'm not,' He mumbles, before turning back to Ralph. 'Fuck. C'mere. Sit there.' He points to the portion of the console that's bare of switches and buttons. Ralph does as he's told, tracing the toe of his shoe along Jack's arm when he rolls the chair over.

'Do you want these off?' Jack whispers, catching an ankle, already unlacing the shoe.

'Nah - the floor's cold.'

'Who said your feet would be on the floor?' Jack scoots closer still, pulling his legs over his shoulders, 'Wanna make you feel good as you made me,' He murmurs, planting a kiss to the inside of his thigh. Ralph smiles and lets out a shaky sigh when his finger rubs over his entrance teasingly.

'Don't even think about going in dry,' He breathes, and Jack laughs, kissing the same spot.

'Wouldn't dream of it,' He murmurs, wheeling back to pick up his uniform, searching for the pocket. Ralph watches, swinging his legs idly. Finally, he returns with a small packet of lube, setting it beside Ralph. 'It's all I brought, gotta make it last.' He murmurs, and Ralph nods, raising his legs again.

'Try spit? It's just your fingers, can't be too bad.' He murmurs, and Jack frowns.

'If I hurt you, tell me to stop. I don't want to push you too far.'

'I will, I promise.' Ralph takes his wrist in his grasp and pulls his hand to his mouth, sucking at three of his fingers. Jack's cock twitches in interest as he pushes his fingers deeper. Ralph takes it well, only pulling back once.

Once his fingers are wet enough, Jack ducks back between his legs, kissing at his thigh.

'Ready?' Ralph nods as he teases his finger at his entrance, 'Deep breath for me, baby,' He waits until Ralph has exhaled, nodding for him to do it again. Only, this time, he eases his middle finger into him on the inhale, and the rest of it turns into a gasp. Ralph stiffens under him, and he rubs his thigh. 'Okay?'

'Yeah,' He whispers, fingers digging into his shoulder, 'Keep going. Slowly.' Jack does, working the finger past the tight of muscle. He kisses his thigh again, murmuring encouragement as he eases deeper.

'That's it, baby. Can you relax a bit for me? You're really tight.' Ralph lets out a shaky breath. Jack nuzzles his nose into the soft skin, slowly moving his finger in and out. He times his breaths with Ralph's, and the blond slowly loosens around him, 'That's it. There you go.' He murmurs, kissing behind his knee.

'Another,' He whispers, and Jack frowns.

'You sure?' Ralph nods, and he does as he's asked, easing another finger into him. Ralph breathes out slowly, deflating above him.

'Yeah. That's... That's good. That's really good.' He breathes. Jack smiles, crooking his fingers experimentally. Ralph's breath hitches and he nods eagerly, hand tight in his hair. 'Really fuckin' good.'

'Even without lube?'

'Even without lube,' Ralph's fingers press to his scalp, his hips pressing forward into his fingers.

'You're so hard for me,' Jack murmurs, fingers running over the head, 'Want me to take care of you?' Ralph nods, and he starts stroking him, not bothering to tease him. Ralph sighs in content again, barely holding himself up.

'Beautiful. Beautiful, beautiful boy.' Jack whispers, biting at the inside of his thigh. He adds another finger, and Ralph cries out loudly, arching off the console.

'Don't stop. So close, so close,' His eyes are screwed shut, head thrown back to the large window behind him, as if he was watching the stars as Jack stretched him on his fingers. 'So close, so so - ' He cuts off with a cry, climaxing without warning. Jack turns his face away, stroking him through the high. He pulls his fingers out of him, standing to pick up the packet of lube.

'You were so good.' He murmurs, kissing his temple. Ralph hums, hands coming up to rest on his upper arms.

'Take me,' He whispers, edging closer to the edge of the console.

'Are you sure? So soon after...'

'Yeah,'

'This is about you, too, Ralph.' Jack kisses his neck, 'I know you - you get sensitive quickly.' To prove his point, he runs his finger down his shaft, and he whimpers, hips moving away. Then, he presses his finger to his entrance, and Ralph whines quietly, pushing at his arm. 'See? You wouldn't be able to handle it.' Ralph sighs and rests his forehead on his shoulder, scooting forward to sit on the edge of the console, pulling Jack between his legs to hug him close.

'But you haven't come yet.'

'We can wait. C'mere.' He pulls Ralph with him as he sits back in the chair. Ralph hums, adjusting himself in his lap. He rests his head on his chest, taking both his hands.

'Love you.'

'Love you, too.'

 

Finally, Ralph is ready to continue, sitting back and making room in his lap to stroke Jack back to hardness. He opens the packet of lube with his teeth, spreading it over his length, his entrance. Jack pulls him back close when he lifts onto his knees, kissing his nose.

'Ready, beautiful?' He murmurs, and Ralph nods, rising up higher to tilt Jack's face up to his, hands on his cheeks, fingers running over his jaw. Slowly, he sinks back onto him, moaning quietly as he does so. Jack kisses him, swallowing the sound, fingertips resting in the dimples at the base of his spine. Ralph moves slowly, lazily, against him, breaking the kiss to press his face in his neck.

'So perfect,' Jack whispers into his hair, tracing his index finger over the moles on his back. 'So _tight_.' Ralph moans again, back arching in pleasure, his sounds becoming higher, needier.

'Love you,' He whimpers, and Jack hums in agreement, kissing his shoulder.

'I know, sweet boy,' He trails his lips up the side of his neck, up his jaw and against his earlobe, 'Get yourself where you need to be.' He winces when Ralph's hand slaps into his cheek, blunt nails pressing to his skin. His free hand presses to his thigh for balance, and he lifts his face from his neck to look at him, never stopping his movements.

'Is it good?' He whispers thickly, and Jack nods, hands travelling to his sides.

'So good, baby. Not gonna last much longer.' Ralph pitches forward again, cheek pushed in his hair. His movements become quicker, more focused. Jack grits his teeth and hisses out a sharp breath, fingers pressing hard enough over his ribs to bruise.

'Want you to come in me,' Ralph whispers, and that's all Jack needs to spill into him with a call of his name, collapsing against him. Ralph's movements slow to a stop until he slumps in his arms, arms dropping to wrap around his waist. Jack pulls out and leans back, closing his eyes.

'That was...' He breathes, and Ralph nods. 'We should probably get going as soon as we catch our breaths. Can't exactly stay and cuddle for the rest of the night.' Despite his words, Jack pulls Ralph closer, breathing in deeply. Ralph lets the satisfaction and exhaustion lull him into a post-sex daze that he knows Jack must be experiencing, too.

His long fingers track patterns over his skin, and they stay like that, half asleep, until, for some reason, Jack jolts back awake.

'Up. We gotta get back.' He orders, urging Ralph from his lap. Ralph whines in protest, watching blearily as he dresses quickly, slowly following his example. Jack helps him once he's clothed, barely pausing to kiss him before he's herding him into the other seat, dropping in the pilot's chair and starting the ship up again. Ralph curls into the chair, pressing his cheek to the high back. He pushes the chair closer to Jack's, smiling up at him, pressing his fingers into the leather of his chair.

'Thank you,' He whispers, and Jack shrugs, reaching over to take his hand.

'Let's get you home.'


	42. XXXVII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> there’s something up with the girl next door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> coffeegrease requested some vampire jager and,,, i did not do that  
> i DID do vampire rogalph so??? halfway there  
> (also it is Lesbian and American bc Reasons)
> 
> Spook Time Is Upon Us

Roger first sees her when her family is unloading the moving truck.

Lounging on a lawn chair in her front yard in shorts and a tank and sunglasses, soaking up the sunny day. She’s got one of those iced tea cups you can buy at Starbucks, but’s it’s filled with something dark and thick. Roger chalks it up to coffee and continues on with her day, trying not to dwell on the curl of her hair around and under her breasts, the plumpness of her lips.

 

She sees her again the next day, in the same spot when she's taking the dog out for a walk. This time, she's wearing something skimpier, her skin golden and glowing in the sun. Roger doesn't realize she's staring until the blonde sits up, pulling her heart-shaped glasses down the bridge of her nose.

'Cute dog.' Roger's mouth goes dry, and she looks down at the dog, who's so excited that his whole body is wagging. 'Can I pet him?'

'Uh. Yeah, I guess.' The girl gets up and drops to her knees in the grass, pulling the dog into her lap.

'Ohmigod, isn't he sweet? What's his name?'

'Uh - Sparkles. My - um, little sister named him.' Roger watches the girl kiss Sparkles on the top of his head, rubbing along his flank. 'He's only a few months old - we got him just before you moved here.'

'He's gonna be small when he grows up? Little white dogs like this always are.' She murmurs, mostly to Sparkles, pushing her glasses back from her face. Roger swallows, trying not to meet her eyes - _those eyes_ , alluring and dark and more complicated than her girl next door appearance gives off.

'Yeah, I guess.'

'You don't really talk much, do you?' The girl bites her lip and lets Sparkle down from her lap, leaning back on her arms. Roger tries to ignore the fact that the angle was just right to see down her tank top, know the color and style of her bra.

'Uh - I should, um, take Sparkles for his walk.' The girl hums and stretches, and Roger knows she's inviting her to admire the curve of her spine, the press of her breasts against the fabric of her top. _Okay, so not your every day girl next door. That's fine. This is fine. Everything is fine._ She swallows and gently guides the dog away from the girl, who follows their movements with her eyes carefully, like she's watching a TV show she's particularly interested in.  
She waits until they're halfway down the street to call after her, voice smoother than velvet.

'What's your name, neighbor?' A shiver traces down Roger's spine, but the idea of calling out so loudly causes her stomach to squeeze in on itself, so she doesn't falter, pretending not to have heard her.

 

She doesn't see her for another week, but she doesn't forget about her. Quite the opposite, actually. Call her crazy, but she can't stop thinking about her eyes, shining over the curved rim of her glasses, the purse of her lips around a straw. The length of her legs, graceful and sun-kissed.

After the fifth night in a row of waking up with her whole being aching with want and her breath quivering, Roger sighs and stands, glancing out her window. A dart of movement catches her eye and makes her lean further forward, watching as the blonde opens her window and climbs down, gripping at the lattice leaning against the wall and dropping to the back lawn. She cuts across Roger's, and the very thought of their gazes meeting again makes Roger fumble for her lamp, turning it on. The girl freezes in the square of light, then straightens, smiling coolly at her. Roger unlatches her window and pulls it open, leaning out.

'What are you doing?' She hisses.

'Having some fun.' Roger frowns and taps her fingers along the window pane. 'Care to join me?'

'Um - my dad would kill me if he found out I was even up this late.'

'If,' Roger wants to, wants to climb out and down like she had, follow her to wherever she was going. She didn't even know her name, but she was already caught up in her.

'I shouldn't,'

'Alright. Your loss.' She shrugs and continues on her way, and Roger hesitantly closes her window again, leaving it unlatched. Just because.

 

After that, she seemingly sees her everywhere. In the mall, laughing with her equally gorgeous friends. In her window seat, leaning against the glass as she scrolls through her phone, or pets a skinny little cat, staring down at her calmly. Tonight, Roger had stolen a pack of cigarettes from her father and sneaked outside to smoke one. The light drew her eye, and she wished it didn't. The girl stands in her window, pulling her shirt over her head slowly. Although she felt incredibly guilty for looking, she couldn't stop staring as she strips down, for anyone to see. For her to see. Roger drops her gaze and stubs the cigarette out before quietly returning back inside to hide the pack.

The next day, the girl sits in that lawn chair, although the warm months are waning and it really wasn't an appropriate time to do so.

'Hey,' She calls as Roger steps out to get the mail. Roger stops and looks over, unable to stop thinking about how she looked half naked.

'Hey.' She replies, and the girl motions for her to come over. Against her instincts screaming at her to go back inside, she does as she's told. The girl takes a sip of her coffee, licking her lips.

'What's your name?'

'What?'

'Well, I figured that if you're gonna play Peeping Tom, I should at least know your name.'

'I um, I didn't see anything, I was just - '

'Passing by?'

'Um. Roger. I'm - Roger.' The girl hums and nods, returning her attention to her phone. 'What - what about you?'

'Ralph.' She says it so dismissively that Roger almost doesn't process it.

'Oh - um. Pretty.'

'Yeah. Thanks.' Ralph looks back up at her, deliberately looking her up and down.

'Um. I'll catch you later?' Ralph raises a brow but nods.

'Yeah. See you around.' She says calmly, and Roger can feel her gaze burning into her back as she ducks back into her house, clutching the small pile of flyers and bills.

 

Roger knew it was a bad idea the moment she decided to join her friends on their Friday night at the bar. Her father would get pissed, she would get piss drunk. And it wouldn’t turn out well for her at all.

But she still downs each shot that's offered to her without a care, finally able to stop thinking about Ralph.

That is, until she heads home.

It’s silent outside the bar, and she’s the first of her friends to turn in - even though it’s pitch dark and well past midnight.

In the alley by the bar, there’s an ear piercing scream, a desperate plea to get away. In Roger's drunken stupor to defend whoever’s in the alley, she doesn’t stop to think as she looks for something to arm herself with.

Brandishing a rusted ladder rung that she had pried from a fire escape, she rushes into the alley, and the sight she is greeted with is disappointingly sober.

Some poor girl is pinned to the pavement by another girl, both faces mostly hidden by long, golden hair. The girl looks towards her and gasps, broken and shuddering, weakly reaching for her as best she can. The metal bar clatters to the ground, and the other girl sits back slightly, flipping her hair from her bloodied face to look at Roger. Ralph straddles the girl, pinning her wrists to the the pavement. Her eyes seem pitch black in the poor light, and the lower half of her face is spread with blood. A good part of the girl's throat is torn away, and Roger distantly wonders how she's stayed alive this long. Ralph bares long, bloodied fangs for a moment before realizing who it is and straightening, coughing as she wipes her mouth on the curve of her wrist. As if that would do anything.

'So you aren’t a total social recluse. Good to know.' She says as nonchalantly as she would if she was sitting in her lawn chair and not literally murdering a girl. There’s a sound that Roger can only describe as a sucking sound as Ralph's fangs retract and her eyes clear. Roger gapes for a moment, then, unable to think of anything else to do, she turns on her heel and briskly walks back the way she came, perfectly content to go back inside and get drunk enough that she won’t remember this the next day.

Behind her Ralph curses, and there’s a horrible, wet crack, and the shuddering breathing of the girl stops. She runs after her and grabs her upper arm.

'Don't.'

'Look - I-I won't tell. Promise. Just... I'll probably forget about it in the morning. Please.' Ralph frowns up at her, and she doesn’t let up. 'Please, Ralph, just lemme - who would believe me, if I told anyone anyways? Fuck! Just - ' She tugs, and her hand tightens around her bicep, making her wince. Suddenly, she drags her into a kiss, hand clasped on the back of her neck. It's hard and bruising and desperate, and it tastes entirely of blood. Roger doesn't pull away. Ralph lets go off her arm and pushes her away, wiping quickly at her face, as if she's realized what she's done. Roger blinks and licks her lips, then doesn't look back when she walks home.

 

She wakes up in bed with a pounding headache and the worst hangover she can recall having. Although, she can't recall much. The night before is just a blur of warmth and drinks, then the cold wet and the best kiss she's ever had. If only she could remember who that kiss was with, she'd be golden.

When she walks Sparkles, she feels like the literal embodiment of Death - she's got a hood drawn over her face and her father's ridiculously dark sunglasses pushed as far up her nose as they can go.

'Roger,' She jumps - she hadn't noticed Ralph, sitting on the curb. She looks like she's just gotten out of the shower - her hair in wet, loose waves that soak through the huge shirt she wears as a dress, her face fresh and clean.

'Oh, um, hey.' Ralph hums as she pushes the hood from her head.

'How was your night?' She says carefully, absentmindedly rubbing at a bruise on her arm.

'It was alright. I kinda regret going out. How about, um, you?'

'Oh. Boring. I stayed in.' She says in a way that tells Roger that she's lying, and she went somewhere. 'What happened last night that makes you regret it?'

'Uh - nothing, really. I just... I drank too much.' Ralph smiles like she can relate, and nods.

'Nothing... Out of the ordinary happened?' She prompts, and Roger shrugs, pushing back a smile when she remember the smudged memory of the kiss of last night.

'I should, um, go.'

 

She doesn’t expect to see her for the rest of the day, but she’s sitting on her step when she comes back.

'What’s your number?' She asks when she’s stepped up to her side.

'Why?'

'Because I think you’re sweet, and I want to get to know you.' Roger flushes, then hesitantly pulls her phone from her back pocket. Ralph smiles and stands, taking it from her and typing her number into a new contact under a simple kiss emoji. Roger presses her lips together and glances up at her. Could she mean - ?

'Don’t be shy.' Ralph whispers and steps down past her, and Roger can’t get the smell of her perfume out of her head.

 

All of Roger’s instincts scream at her to stay far away from Ralph - she practically radiates bad news.

But she can’t help but go over every time she sends a suggestive Snapchat or a two word text, can’t help but let Ralph drag her into bed and climb on top of her.

Even though every time she bites at her throat, it gives her a bad taste in her mouth, and she gets the sense of a repressed memory prodding to come back up. Even though she often goes home with bruises and bleeding lovebites.

 

Tonight, Ralph falls asleep with her face pressed to her neck, hands over her upper arms. She breathes deep and then sighs, rolling over and bringing her with her.

’Have I ever told you that you smell amazing?’ She breathes, and Roger jumps.

’I thought you were asleep.’

’I never sleep,’ Ralph kisses her throat and hums, hands tight over her arm, ‘Can I try something?’

’What?’ Her flat teeth press over her pulse and she sucks at the skin, biting gently. Roger lets out a shuddering breath and can’t push back the unsettling feeling rising in her stomach.

’You’re so amazing,’ Ralph breathes, ‘And pretty, and just so - so you.’ She bites down harder, and Roger gasps, panic rising. Making sure to be gentle, she pushes her off and presses the heel of her hand over the spot, making sure it didn’t come away red. Ralph blinks and frowns, lip pushing out in a pout.

’Did I hurt you?’

’Kinda.’ Ralph leans up and kisses the spot gently in apology, before pulling her down to her chest.

’Didn’t mean to,’ Roger nods and leans into her, arm winding around her waist out of habit, ‘Can you stay tonight?’ Roger hesitates, then nods again, and Ralph hums, pleased.

 

She doesn’t remember falling asleep, but she is woken by Ralph’s fingers sliding along her spine. Her hands are always a strange mix of warm and cold, and she shivers, leaning away from her touch.

’Hey,’ Ralph whispers, ‘I’ve been thinking.’

’About what?’

’Us. Can you promise me something?’ Roger looks up at her in the dark room, and her eyes seem to glow in the poor light.

’Of course,’

’Can we stay together? Forever?’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn’t know how to end this lmao


	43. XXXVIII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> if you're grossed out by blood or like... knifeplay and blood kink... dont read this ig???

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> coffeegrease requested... A Lot of things for me to do but i chose to do knifeplay bc??? a lot of other people wanted more jager so  
> two birds with one stone ig???  
> i did not prepare for this in the slightest, and. it shows rip
> 
> (roger is kinda ooc but i don’t!!! care sue me bitch)

Jack tilts his head back to try and see under the edge of the blindfold, tugging halfheartedly at the binds pinning his wrists to the headboard. He can hear Roger moving around the room, slow and deliberate, and he groans in frustration.

'C'mon, baby, I'm dyin' here.' He calls, moving backwards to sit up. His hand rests on his thigh, and he gasps, startled by the sudden warmth. Roger hums by his ear, kissing the side of his head.

'I wouldn't go so far as to say you're  _dying_.' He murmurs, hand trailing up to brush across his briefs. Jack gasps and resists the urge to buck his hips up into his hands.

' _Roger_ ,' He murmurs through gritted teeth, grabbing at the chains. Roger's lips brush down his jaw, then press to his pulse for a moment before he pulls away completely. Tugging at the chains again, Jack leans forward after the way he thinks he's gone, sighing in annoyance, 'Can't you take this off? I want to see you.'

Suddenly, Roger climbs on top of him, something cold pressing to his sternum.

'I thought I was in charge tonight,'

'You are,' Jack breathes, trying to figure out what it is,

'Then the blindfold stays on, until I say it comes off. Understand me?'

'Yes,' The object presses to his skin, and he jumps, 'Sir.'

'Good. You said you wouldn't mind knives, as long as I didn't cut deep. That still true?' His cock twitches in interest when he realizes what was moving across his chest, and Roger laughs, grinding back against him to point it out. 'I like that answer.' The knife comes away and Jack whines at the loss. Roger's blunt nails rake down his stomach, making him moan loudly.

'How much do you like these pants?' Roger hums, moving down to mouth at his cock through his briefs.

'They're my favourite pair.' The knife slips through the leg hole, pausing in its movement as Roger considers.

'I'll buy you new ones,' He finally murmurs, cutting through the fabric. If it were any other situation, Jack would've protested, maybe even called it off, but all he can think of is how sharp the knife must be to be able cut through it so easily. Roger hums, cutting away the other leg and pulling the ruined pair away. Jack lets out a breath through his teeth, leaning back against the headboard.

'So what should I do with you, hm?' Roger murmurs, 'I mean, you're already unbelievably hard, I don't really _need_ to do anything.'

'Baby, I need you.'

'What do you need, love?' Roger's hand presses to the inside of his thigh, massaging the skin gently.

'I just need you. Need to feel you. Hear you. See you, definitely.'

'You want the blindfold off?'

'Yes, sir,' He breathes, and Roger hums, kissing the spot he had massaged.

'In a moment, 'kay, love?' Jack sighs, pushing his face to his upper arm when Roger pulls his leg up over his shoulder, kissing the back of his knee, then resting his cheek on his shin, knife resting on the spot just above his kneecap.

'Ready for this?' Jack doesn't have a chance to ask what he meant by  _this_ before the knife presses into his skin, blood trickling down his thigh. He whines at the sting as Roger quickly rests the knife on his other thigh, attention drawn to the cut. 'Is that okay? Not too deep?' He murmurs anxiously, and Jack nods.

'It's fine. 's perfect. You're amazing,' He hums, and he can feel Roger's broad smile when he kisses the cut before pressing his clothed wrist to it. 'Are you still dressed?'

'Only my shirt. I'll take it off when I'm done, don't worry.' His wrist is brought away from the still-stinging cut, and the knife is picked up again, the tip tracing down his thigh. Two fingers prod carefully over his ribs, his stomach, and Jack frowns.

'What are you doing?' He murmurs as he presses his fingers to a soft part of his stomach, where there was a small amount of pudge.

'Ready?' The knife rests where his fingers were when he pulls them away, the knife easing into his skin slightly. Roger doesn't pull out, and Jack grits his teeth, says his name through them.

'Roger - what the _fuck_ are you - ' The blade twists around twice and he cries out, lurching forward. The knife immediately leaves, and Roger pushes his wrist to the wound again.

'Too much?' Jack shakes his head and slumps forward, arms straining behind him.

'Don't do that again,' He hisses regardless, and Roger takes his face in his hands, kissing him briefly.

'Sorry, love. I just wanna try one more thing, 'kay? The blindfold can come off after, yes?' Jack nods, going slack. Roger moves up to kneel over his chest, the tip of the knife running down his sternum again, this time drawing blood. The cut is long and slow and shallow, and Jack tries not to move, tries not to make it worse, focusing on Roger when he bends over to kiss him. 'That's it, you're doing so well.' The knife drops to the bed beside him, and Roger pulls back, presumably looking over him.

'Hm. On second thought, I think I'll keep that on,' He runs his finger along the edge of the blindfold, nudging it up a little bit so Jack can see a sliver of light, 'You look really good like this.'

'Baby - ' Jack gasps when Roger bites at his collarbone, ' - Please. I need to see you.' The knife is back, and Roger makes a quick cut without warning him, and he gasps, hips twitching.

'Don't do that,' Roger murmurs, pushing his hips back to the bed, 'I don't want to cut too deep.'

'Warn me next time then.' Jack slumps back, giving up on trying to predict what Roger would do next. He moves off him to settle beside him, elbow still set lightly on his stomach, enough weight to let Jack know he's resting his cheek in his palm.

'I love you,' He murmurs, mouthing at the cut on his thigh. Jack shifts his thigh against his mouth, unable to do anything else, and hums in agreement.

'I love you, too, baby,' His breath catches when the flat of Roger's tongue presses to the skin just above the cut, 'I'd love you a lot more if I could touch you. Or even just _see_ you.' Roger laughs, mouthing down his thigh.

'How much more?'

'Right now - I love you _so fucking much_. This blindfold comes off, and I love you... Twice as much? Maybe even four times as much.'

'Hm. Tempting. But I guess I'll just have to survive.' Roger pulls his hips up and kisses the spot where he twisted the knife. His arms snap forward and the bed frame creaks. After a pause, he rests his heel on the small of his back and whines, unable to do anything other than that. Roger moves down and bites at the flesh right below the wound, then kisses it as a quick apology when Jack gasps in pain, flinching away. His hands press to his hips, pushing him back in place, kissing the spot just above his cock.

'Take these off, please. I wanna fuck your mouth.' Jack whispers, pulling at the cuffs more insistently.

'You're quite demanding for someone who's not supposed to be in charge.' Roger murmurs in reply, hand trailing up his stomach.

'C'mon, baby, just think about it - ' Another tug at the chains, ' - You like it when I fuck your mouth, don't you?'

'I like it when you fuck me in general.' Roger pulls away and Jack leans forward, groaning in frustration.

'Yeah, but - I could pull your hair like you like. Choke you, if you were up for it.' Roger’s fingers trace up his stomach, pulling outwards around his pectorals, the touch barely there.

'Bargaining won't work today, Chief. You said I'd be in charge tonight, and I fully intend to hold you to that.' Roger kisses his ear, hand resting over his throat. Jack makes a small, barely noticeable, noise of pleasure when his fingers press in. 'So stop talking, or I'll find something to gag you, too.' Against his thigh, Jack’s cock twitches again, and Roger hums, sitting back to press weight again it.

'Yes, sir.' Jack murmurs, wetting his lips.

'Good boy,' Roger leans over and opens the bedside table drawer. Jack shivers with the familiar sound of wood scraping on wood, the uncapping of the bottle of lube. Roger’s hand is slick over his length, and Jack sighs in relief at the contact. The other boy runs his index finger along the edge of the mask, lifting it enough for Jack to get a glimpse of his torso before it snaps back in place. Somehow, it's enough to tide him over for the next few minutes, until Roger inevitably loses interest in the lack of compliments and eye contact and takes the blindfold off completely.  
The heel of his hand presses to his windpipe as Roger adjusts himself, hovering over him. Jack gives a choked gasp, trying to reach for him.

'Please,' He croaks when Roger makes no move. Although it lacks the title that Roger losely enforced the use of, it's enough. Maybe because he knew that Jack fucking Merridew never said please for anything. But he sinks back onto him, other hand pressing over his heart as he moans, low and long and quivering near its end.

Jack had never really thought about the feeling of Roger squeezed around him before, other than it felt good and Roger was kind enough to let him leave marks and mumble clumsy dirty things in his ear without laughing at the stupid phrasing. But without his sight, he is left buried in the feeling of Roger over him, face pushed into his neck, so amazing it's almost overwhelming.

'Fuck, baby, I've never noticed how warm you are. Shit. Fuck-damn. God -fucking-damn you feel good,' He mumbles, less then eloquent, and Roger hums, hips rolling lazily as his arms move to drape over his shoulders, 'So tight and warm and - fuckin' _amazing_. I love you so much, baby, so fucking much.' Roger's head lifts, then his lips press to his jaw.

'Love you, too,' He murmurs thickly, 'Love this.' A finger eases under the strap of the blindfold, and Jack smiles, figuring that he was correct about his assumptions. But the blindfold remains on as Roger seems to find a purpose and rhythm to his moves. He sits back, and Jack knows that he's missing the best part, the bit just before Roger loses himself, when he's still half there. Spine straight and hands balled into his fists at his side, eyes closed and head thrown back, mouth open in a silent cry. It's always short, but Jack thinks he's breathtaking in that second of pure pleasure before it all blurs.

Sure enough, Roger slumps back against his shoulder and lets out a long moan, voice trembling. Jack is annoyed he missed it, but he's glad for the return of contact, moving in Roger as best he can without the usual leverage of grabbing at his waist.

'You're amazing, baby.' He mumbles when Roger shifts, temple resting on his shoulder. Roger hums distractedly, and Jack thinks that he must be watching him fuck him, judging by the soft noises he makes. Or he might just be touching himself, Jack couldn't see either way.

Then, Roger suddenly starts moving again, grabbing at his ribs, riding him in a way that makes it clear that he’s intent on getting him to come, and to do it soon. The slick sound of his hand going over his cock gives Jack the answer to his earlier ponderings, and he moans, hand shifting so his fingers press right into a wound, and Jack cries out, bucking his hips.

'Fuck, baby, I'm gonna fuckin' - ' Roger cuts him off with a louder moan, spilling onto his stomach. Suddenly, the blindfold is pulled off, and the sudden blare of light, mixed with the sting of his come mixing with his blood is what brings him over the edge, falling forward with a cry. Roger weakly pulls off, stroking him until he pulls his hips away.

Blinking as he recovers, Jack slumps forward to look over himself.

'Too much?' Roger asks anxiously, bloodied hand on his arm as he takes in the handprints and smears over his torso, his thighs. Even Roger’s own thighs have streaks of red on the backs, where he had rode him. Jack twists to kiss his knuckles, still bound to the frame.

'I'd say it's not enough.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jack and roger are freaks lmao


	44. XXXIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the love of my life, jes, asked me to do something in Shakespearan English and i did it bc no offence but i would literally die for her
> 
> this is... so dumb but idk it was quick and easy ig

‘Thy lips art so soft, ' Jack mumbles from above Ralph, did do bend ov'r him on the chaise, his hand pressed to his cheek. Ralph hums, lilted and temperate, tilting his head back further.

'I would returneth the sentiment, but then 't would not beest telling the whole sooth, sir.' Jack maketh a hurtling resembling a chortle and draws back, spine straightening. His hands did set on Ralph's shoulders, thumb resting on his jaw.

'Oh, lief sirrah, ' He whispers, calloused thumb smoothing ov'r his cheek, 'How I admire thy penchant for honesty. Thee art as pure as thy image suggests - the purest of beauties yond I hast ever did did lie mine eyes on.'

id do catch between stolen moments in the garden and in the strains of first light. The lord of the house hath did leave the estate exsufflicate for the evening, leaving his son high-lone with the staff - the staff who is't couldst care less at which hour Ralph locks himself in the study with the gardener, blinds drawn tight. In the glow of the firelight, Ralph's hair glows golden and soft, a literal halo of his purity, his cheeks a dusted pink and eyes warm, ope and endlessly trusting. Jack suddenly rushes 'round the side of the chaise to kneel by his side, clasping his handeth.

'Mine dearest sirrah, ' He whispers, and Ralph blinks, startled by this sudden passion. Sooth beest did tell, Jack himself is not unaffected. His free handeth presses to his cheek, and he rises onto his knees, their noses brushing, an exhilarating contact.

'mine dearest sirrah - ' He starts again, ' - I love thou moo than I can ever did put to words - mine heart aches and soars when I bethink of thou, and at which hour I am not by thy side, I long to beest in thy embrace, ever yours and still moo did love by thou. Being graced with thy love fills me with moo joy than God couldst ever grace me with - for thou art mine travelling lamp, mine moon, the sweet Heavens above. To measure mine love for thou, lief Ralph, 't would beest as though I did has't did set out to count the stars - an impossible task I would beest so willing to did set out to doth, needeth thou only asketh,' Ralph leans fia, fingers easing in the spaces between his, pressing to the back of his handeth, 'if 't be true thou art ever in doubt of mine love, I would spendeth mine entire lifetime bestowing thou with evidence of mine devotion,'

'Shh, honey, quiet, ' Ralph whispers in returneth, lips brushing his Cupid’s bow, 'nay moo, I needeth not beest did convince of thy love - I too feeleth the intense devotion of which thou speaketh. The notion of quitting thou causes me as much teen as the nessecity to leaveth thy catch but a wink chamber each morn and thy side each day. If 't be true I wast able, I'd did lie-to an embroidery needle and stitch myself to thy side - and I would beest perfectly content in a life like yond, by thy side for the rest of mine days, joyous and warm and yours, at each moment and only.' Jack pulls him from the chaise to the floor, drawing him into a fervent kiss.

'I am sure thy that from which we speaketh is the creation of all things holy and pure - ' Jack murmurs, inurn'd in the kiss, ' - Each stolen kiss from these sweet lips is like a prayer, and I am ever willing to kneel 'ere thou.' Ralph draws aroint and doth take his visage in his hands.

'Runneth aroint with me, Jack.' He whispers, voice infitely moo intense than the kiss just broken. 'taketh mine heart and mine handeth - they art entirely yours, and I tender those folk, in addition to mine whole self, readily.'

'Dearest Ralph, I would if 't be true 't wast a possibility. I’d taketh thou from this lodging in a did split moment, taketh thou to a land whence nay soul would intercept us. I’d taketh thou far and I’d taketh thou festinate - 't pains me to keepeth our love eyeless in the dark, at which hour 't deserves to beest ope and bright and seen by all.'

''t is possible, love. Aught is, if 't be true thy heart is true and thy intentions pure.'

'The only thing truer and purer is thou, mine love.'

'Then we'll wend.'

 

At the breaketh of dawn, they mazzard out in the horizons, daybreak on their faces and Ralph’s lord father’s gold heavy in their pockets. Their hands join, and Ralph rests his mazzard on Jack’s shoulder.

'mine love for thou is true as can beest, dear Jack. I tender mine entirety to thou unconditionally, and only asketh yond thou tender me the same love. 't is the only thing I require in life to beest joyous and whole.' Although Jack sayeth nothing in response, his soft and caring smileth sayeth entirely enow for Ralph.

And 't's perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this in modern english then put it through this translator so idk if it’s accurate.  
> if you’re interested in reading this in modern english, lemme know, and ill post it as a second part to this lmao


	45. XL

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> spagoti sent in a request to do some jalph hatefucc and,,, hatefucc they did
> 
> (i have so many requests im so sorry im not filling them out quickly)

Ralph hated the taste of paint on his tongue. He hated the stench of sweat that seemed to cling to the air around him. He hated the clench of greedy fingers around his hips, the dig of teeth over his pulse. Hated how he’ll trace over the marks left, struggling not to smile at the sting.

He hated Jack Merridew. And Jack Merridew hated him.

 

The tree Jack has him pinned against scrapes at his back, the back rubbing his bare skin raw and sensitive with each movement.

Jack grabs at his wrists, pressing into a harsh kiss. His thigh is between Ralph’s, grinding cruelly to his groin, and Ralph wishes he didn’t know how to get him squirming so easily. He bites his lip so hard he yelps, grabbing at a handful of curls.

’Watch it,’ He hisses when he wrenches Jack away, and the redhead grins.

’I’d pretend to love it when you take the lead,’ His hand travels to his throat, palm pressing on his windpipe, ‘But don’t pretend you don’t like it rough. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t keep comin’ back.’

’Shut up,’

’You get off on the knowledge that I could crush your windpipe and not even blink, am I right?’

’Shut _up_ ,’

’Make me.’ He thinks Jack is backing down when he lets go of him, until he turns him and pulls his hips to his. ‘Let’s see what you’ve got, pretty boy.’ Ralph huffs out and straightens up.

'You don't tell me what to do.' Jack laughs cruelly, pulling him to his chest.

'Really? I thought you liked when I took control.'

'Never said that.'

'You don't need to,' Jack mouths at his pulse, hand pressing to his groin. Ralph's cheeks heat as he looks away, 'C'mon, Chief. Y'know you want to. Just a little.' Ralph swallows thickly and meekly beginning to grind back against him. Jack hums, biting at his neck. 'That's it, pet. You're gettin' there.' Jack's arm wraps around his hips, pulling him closer as he bites at his shoulder, definitely leaving marks.

'Why don't you show me how it's done?' Ralph whispers in an attempt to try and trump this feeling of smallness. Jack laughs and presses his free hand over his growing erection.

'You already know what I can do. Show me. Unless... you're all talk.' Ralph immediately frowns and pushes back against him, grabbing at his arm.

'You wish.' He grits out, noticing how Jack's arm tightens possessively around his hips, noticing how he can feel him stiffen against his rear. He grins and leans back, moving his hips in a lazy sway. 'I bet I could get you to come right here, in your pants.' Jack scoffs breathlessly, even though they both knew he could - and will - do it.

'Keep dreamin', pretty boy.' He murmurs against the shell of his ear. Ralph rolls his eyes, trying not to shiver when he runs his thumb along the curve of his ear, jarring in its gentleness. Then, Jack grabs his hip and hauls him up closer, kissing the spot just below his ear. Ralph steadies himself with the tree as Jack pulls his briefs down gracelessly, fingers pressing to his thighs when they're off.

  
They wind up on the ground, a stick digging into the small of Ralph's back. He hates when they end up like this, his legs spread like a whore's, Jack pressed between them. Ralph pulls him down to his chest to push his face into his neck. Jack grabs at his ribs, hard and almost bruising, pulling him up against him.

'I hate you,' Ralph says through a moan when two spit-slicked fingers push into him. Jack hums, biting his shoulder.

'I hate you, too, pretty boy.' His fingers crook inside of him, and Ralph whines, grabbing for his wrist. His other hand presses to the middle of his back, up between his shoulder blades, nails digging into the sunburnt skin. Jack winces and presses his face to Ralph’s neck, absentmindedly sucking marks into his skin, focus drawn to his fingers and the noises Ralph makes when he pushes them in deep. Ralph wants to push him away - he’s too close, it gives the illusion of intimacy - but he doesn’t want to risk losing the flex of his fingers in him. Instead, he pushes his mouth to his shoulder, muffling his noises. Jack pauses to push his hair from his neck, pulling back. Ralph drops back to the ground, watching as he pulls his fingers away, rolling his hips up. Jack looks back at him and smiles for a moment before pushing it away.

'Have I ever told you how pretty you look like this?' Ralph rolls his eyes and lowers his hips again, 'If you looked like this all the time, I might be able to stand being around you more.'

'How do I look that’s so appealing?' Ralph murmurs, pushing back a snide comment. Jack ducks down low, kisses the flush that spreads across Ralph's chest in moments like this.

'Pink and beautiful and ready to be fucked,' He murmurs, biting his skin. Ralph gasps, not expecting it, and he grins, sitting back on his heels.

'If I'm so ready to be fucked, why don't you get it over with?' He murmurs, starting to turn over. Jack stops him with a hand on his hip.

'Not that way. I like seeing your face when you come.' Ralph raises his brows and drops back onto his back, spreading his legs again.

'Careful, Merridew,' He whispers when Jack grabs his hips and pulls him closer, lifting his hips so his body is curled uncomfortably, bottom half in his lap, 'You don't wanna seem like you actually like me.' Jack snorts and bends to bite his thigh.

'You wish,' The heel of his hand presses to Ralph's cock, making him gasp, shifting so he's more comfortable, 'I can't appreciate a pretty face? You're hot when you come.' Ralph flushes and looks away.

'Shut up. Just - do what you're good at.' He mumbles, and Jack hums, hoisting him up closer, lining himself up with his entrance. He eases in without warning, groaning and grabbing his wrists, pinning them above his head. Ralph gasps again, heel digging into the small of his back. Jack keeps his wrists pinned with one hand, his other grabbing Ralph's hip as he sinks deeper into him. His teeth press to his jaw, then his pulse when Ralph rolls his head back to bare his neck for him.

'This is the only time I can kind of stand you, you know.' He murmurs, and Ralph hums, tugging halfheartedly against his grip.

'I never stand you. Too much talking, not enough shagging.' Jack rolls his eyes and rocks against him, leaning down low.

'What do you call this?'

'Not enough,' Ralph murmurs in reply, and Jack raises his brows, sitting back and letting go of his wrists to pump his cock with quick, short strokes. Ralph moans, one hand flying to Jack's upper arm, nails digging into his arm, and the other grabbing the soil beneath him. Jack bends and kisses his collarbone, grabbing at his throat as he moves to bite his earlobe, pushing hard into him. Ralph's voice goes high when he whines, eyes rolling back when Jack's thumb presses against his windpipe. Jack falters for a moment when he catches sight of him.

'Fuck,' He says quietly, kissing the spot behind his ear, 'You may be a brat, but goddamn if you're not breathtaking.' Ralph moans, the sound ending cough when Jack presses down hard on his throat, arching into him. His arm braces around his hips, lifting so their hips are flush together. Jack watches his face closely and starts to chase his own orgasm. He leans over him and bites his collarbone hard, coming when Ralph cries out loudly, grabbing and yanking at his hair. He groans, low and drawn out, when he does, letting go of Ralph and pulling out, dropping back and catching his breath. Ralph sits up on his elbows and sighs, pushing his hair from his face, watching him lazily. Jack glances over at him and moves closer, fingers wrapping around his cock as he strokes him slowly. Kissing his knee, he picks up the pace when Ralph hums, pleased and lazy in the afterglow. He almost doesn't notice when he comes, hips pressing into Jack's forearm as he curses quietly, spilling over Jack's knuckles. Jack pulls away and wipes his hand clean, regarding Ralph carefully as he pulls his briefs back on.

'When will I see you again?' He asks. Ralph pauses, looking over at him.

'When you decide to stop throwing a hissy fit, and come home.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i kinda saw this as like... jack has gone off on his own but things havent rlly gone to shit yet


	46. XXXII.ii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ive been recently binge watching safiya nygaards videos and i watched her history of lipstick video and i was so struck by inspiration that i was SHOOK
> 
> so. the continuation of the ‘20s au that no one asked for  
> (ONLY!!! AESTHETICS!!!)

An hour before the club is set to open, Ralph enters Jack's office without bothering to knock.

She almost doesn’t recognize her - even though she had been singing at the club for 3 months now, she had only seen her all done up - or undone, gasping and sprawled over her desk. Now, she’s the epitome of a young aristocrat - coat done up to her chin, dress to her ankles, sleeves to her wrist. Her hair is pinned up under a hat, and her hands hidden by gloves. Jack sits up straighter before she realizes who it is, and smiles.

’What brings you here at this hour, songbird?’ She asks, double checking the time.

’Can I get ready in here?’ Ralph leans on the doorknob, chewing her lip.

’There’s a perfectly good dressing room backstage.’

’I know,’ Her words are accentuated by the click of the lock sliding into place. Jack looks up in interest, smile turning lazy and smug.

‘Can’t get enough of me?’ She stands smoothly, pulling the fur she’s got slung in each crook of her arms free. Ralph meets her eye and swallows, leaning up when the fur drops to the floor at their feet. ‘Don’t worry, baby. I feel the same ‘bout you, y’know.’ Ralph’s breath falters when her mouth presses just above the neckline of her coat. ‘You’re my best girl, remember?’

’I really do need to change. I go on in an hour.’

’Why’d you come in here then? To be a tease?’ Ralph squirms out from under her and walks away to set her clutch down on the desk. Jack watches her hips sway, and she scoffs. ‘That is what you’re here for, isn’t it?’ Ralph hums in reply and undoes the fastener of her coat, letting it slide down her arms. Hidden under her coat is one of the dresses she wore when she performs, bright and light and so tempting to just tear away. She frees the hat and turns back to Jack.

’What do you think? Down or up?’ She asks, running her hand through her hair.

’You’re breathtaking either way.’

’Yes, but what about the boys? Which will they like better?’ Jack frowns at the mention of her patrons and the suggestion that they drooled over Ralph. Over _her_ Ralph. Even though she knew it happened - seen it with her own eyes, too. Once, she had seen a man lean over her at the bar, a predatory smile dominating his features as he peered down her dress. She had Roger take him out behind the bar and shoot that leer off his face, made sure Ralph heard nothing of it.

’The boys don’t matter, songbird.’ She murmurs, pushing Ralph against the desk. Ralph bites her lip and laughs quietly.

’I know. But I like the attention they give me. And I especially like the attention you give me when you find out.’

’Is that so?’

’Mhm,’ Jack kisses her gently, hand trailing down her sternum.

’You’re too spoiled, you know that? All those years of growing up in big houses with pretty things. All those years of stupid boys buying you expensive things to try and gain your love.’

’And girls,’ Ralph whispers.

’And girls.’ Jack agrees. Her thumb runs over the ring she had bought her the week before, gold and shining, her initials engraved into the inside. Not an engagement ring, of course, more like a stake of her territory. 'I don't have to try, though, do I?' Ralph smiles, cloy and silent, and steps out from under her arm, opening her clutch to pull out a long pearl necklace. It must be new - Jack hadn't seen it before.

'I think I like your diamonds better.'

'Yes, but this goes with my dress. See?' She sways her hips with a squish of fringe and clack of pearls. She loops the string around once so it's layered - tight around her throat then hanging down her flattened chest. Jack follows her, running her finger down the string. Then, she twists the tightened part around her finger and tugs at it, pulling Ralph back to her front, kissing her temple.

'You'll break it if you keep yankin' on it like that.' Ralph murmurs, and Jack hums, free hand trailing down her side to hike up the skirt of her dress.

'I'll buy you a new one if I do.' Using the string of pearls to tug her back to the desk. Ralph doesn't need to be told in order to hop up onto it's surface, and Jack sinks to her knees, pushing her skirt up around her hips.

'Baby, the band is gonna want me for set up in fifteen minutes.' Ralph murmurs, stopping her with a hand on her forehead.

'I only need five,' Jack takes hold of her wrist and quickly kisses her fingers. Ralph bites her lip and glances at the door, then nods, smiling mischievously.

 

True to her word, Jack lets Ralph go seven minutes later, smoothed back to perfection but still sensitive enough to be unable to walk correctly.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was short pbb  
> but um  
> this is gonna be the last update for a while, because i really want to start on a original story i've been planning. so um. updates will be back??? whenever i get that done ig ok bye


	47. XLI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an anon on my tumblr wanted a titanic au  
> and ive been meaning to write one for A Long Ass Time  
> y’all know me. im a broke ass bitch who loves that cliche shit
> 
> i skipped all that boring ass shit where rose (ralph) is old and ‘when i was ur age i had sex in cars and was a selfish ass bitch who took up an entire door and let my boyf/fling of a day freeze in the atlantic ocean’
> 
> (and lemme jus say???! jack dawson in the movie? An Icon and A Treasure and All Men Should Be Like Him. also i luv the floppy 90s hair it’s such a look)

Jack knew he had this shit in the bag.

He keeps his expression cool and slightly concerned, Roger at his side. His companion is sweating profusely, and Jack knew his hand was shit.

Didn’t matter. He had them covered.

'Moment of truth, boys,' He says coolly, looking around the table. A short distance away, the Titanic’s whistle cuts through the air. He leans back in his chair, 'Someone’s life is about to change.'

 

Seven minutes later, he runs down the deck of the Titanic, hand around Roger’s forearm.

'We’re the luckiest sons of bitches in the world!’ He cries, exalted.

 

x.x 

 

'I don't see what all the fuss is about,' Ralph says, coolly appraising the ship before them. His fiancee steps down from the carriage and takes his offered arm, frowning up at him when he continues, 'Looks just as big as any other ship out there.'

'Don't be so blase, sugarpea,' She says, smiling falsely. 18 and naive, Ralph knew enough to know that the 17 year-old Dorothy was only after his family’s money.  
But she was young and beautiful, and _he_ was young and beautiful, and they had been the finest couple in London. Surely, they would give the Americans a good run for their money.

'...says that there is even a Parisian café. Remember our vacation in France?' Ralph hadn't even noticed that she had been continuing to talk. He nods and smiles politely.

'A grand time.'

Ralph's father has come up behind them, and Dorothy glances over her shoulder at him.

'Your son is astonishingly hard to please, sir.' She says, an edge of teasing in her tone. His father smiles, reserved, eyes trained ahead of them.

'He gets it from his mother. So,' A valet bustles past them with a cart stacked high with their belongings, nearly running into the man, 'This is the unsinkable ship.'

'They say God himself couldn’t sink it,' Ralph adds in coolly, as a lower-class family rudely pushes past him. He stumbles, then rolls his eyes.

'Honestly, Dorothy, if your family wasn't in the habit of booking things at the last moment, we wouldn’t have to run along like some putrid immigrant family.'

'Well, we wouldn’t be late if I wasn't made to change.' Ralph inwardly rolls his eyes again and escorts his fiancé to the gangway.

But yet, under his cool exterior, he couldn’t shake the feeling that this 'ship of dreams' was truthfully a slave ship, and that he was being made to go to America in shackles. Beneath the appearance of a high-society youth, he was screaming.

 

x.x

 

Jack leans over the railing of the Titanic, waving wildly at the masses below. Roger leans over beside him as he calls his farewells down.

'Do you know anybody?'

'No. That's not the point,' He says, and Roger looks at him strangely, 'It's more of the symbolism of it all, mate.'

  
On their way down to third class, Jack collides with a first class boy emerging from the lift, so hard that the blond stumbles back. He thinks of apologizing, then the blond scowls at him and shoves past him, and he spins on his heel to present his middle finger to the git's receding back.

 

x.x

 

Ralph brushes his shoulder clean of the filth that the lower class boy surely spread on his vest on their collision, then wipes his palm on his handkerchief, shakes his head, and heads towards the Millionaire Suite.

'... surely, these mud puddles were a waste of his money. At least they were cheap,' Dorothy is standing before Ralph's new paintings, studying them with a critical eye. Behind her, her maid is already hanging her dresses up in the wardrobe, prattling away, possessing the ability to make big happenings out of nothing that only a member of the lower class could possess.

'It smells so brand new. I mean... just to think that tonight, when I crawl between the sheets, I'll be the first - ' Ralph decides to make himself known, walking into the bedroom with a straightened back, setting his hand on Dorothy's shoulder. The maid clams up, and he smiles down at the girl.

'And when I climb between the sheets tonight, I'll still be the first,'

'S'cuse me, Miss,'

'The first and only,' Dorothy murmurs, only slightly strained, and Ralph continues on, turning his attentions to the paintings before them.

'And you're wrong, about the art. They're fascinating. But I can't expect a girl of your... distinction to understand the complexity of...' He leans forward to peer at the painter's signature, '...Monet and Picasso.'

'Regardless of the supposed complexities, we'll be late for dinner.' Ralph must applaud the girl, there is no disagreement in her tone, no annoyance in her kinesics.

 

'She is the largest ever moving object ever made by hand in all of history,' Despite Ralph's earlier complaints about the size of the vessel, he now hangs onto the Managing Director's every word when he speaks of the Titanic, 'and our shipbuilder, Mr. Andrews, designed the vessel from her keel plates up.'

'Sure, I may have knocked her together, but Mr. Ismay here, it was his grand idea to create a steamer such as this. And here she is. Willed into solid reality.'

'So, who came up with the name Titanic?' Molly Brown, a loud and extroverted woman, butts in. If Ralph's mother was well enough to make the trip, she would've had a field day gossiping about the new money in their midst.

'I did. I wanted to convey sheer size. Size means stability, luxury, safety...'

'Have you read the works of Sigmund Freud, Mr. Ismay?' Ralph blurts, and he can see the warning in his father's eyes from across the table, 'His ideas on the male fixation on size may be of great interest to you.' Bruce Ismay splutters for a second, and Ralph's father fumes in silent fury. 'Excuse me.'

  
As soon as he stands from the table and walks from the dining hall, the table bursts into quick, scrambling apologies.

Ralph tries to hold back a small smile, and fails.

 

x.x

 

It's moments like this where Jack feels everything lift away. With his sketching pad propped on his thighs and a piece of charcoal clutched between three fingers, Jack sketches a portrait of a father and daughter standing a little ways away, looking at the gulls drifting lazily through the ocean air. With sure, quick strokes, he captures the moment perfectly, and can't help but revel in the swell of pride.

'Typical,' Maurice, a young emigrant who Jack and Roger had met down in third class, sniffs, 'The first class dogs come down here to take their shits.' Jack glances up, irritated at the loss of his focus. A steward passes by, walking three ridiculously ugly dogs. Jack snorts and turns back to his sketch.

'So we know where we rank,' He says, unable to find where he had last lifted his charcoal. He sighs and pushes the leather bound pad from his lap, rolling his neck and stretching his back.  
His gaze wanders across the well deck as Maurice says something else, but he pays no mind. He's caught up on something else. Someone else.

At the railing of the B deck promenade above him, the blond who he had collided with stands with his hands clasped loosely over the metal bar. Normally, he would've felt a flash of contempt, but the way he looked, the way he held himself... The scene above him reminded him of something that a boy he had during his time in Paris would write. The boy had fancied himself a romance novelist, and tended to write sweeping scenes of brooding, isolated heroes and swooning heroines while in bed with him, leaning naked against his chest.  
Now, the blond leans forward, and for a moment Jack thinks he'll pitch himself over the railing, and he lifts slightly, mouth opening. As if he's going to protest. Instead, the blond looks directly at him, and it's like he stares directly into his soul, pushing aside all of the starving artist crap and seeing who he really was, despite never once spoken to one another. Then, the blonde looks away quickly, before - inexplicably - seeming to be drawn back to him.

Just then, a girl comes up behind him and tugs at his sleeve. They argue in the polite, reserved manner that first-classers often do, then the blond pushes past the girl, who hopelessly trails behind him like a lost puppy.

'Are you in the mood to have your ass arrested?' Maurice asks casually, and Jack blinks.

'What?'

'You were staring down that first class couple like you wanted to throw down. Untwist your knickers before you get in trouble, mate.'

 

That night, Jack reclines on a bench, a lit cigarette hanging limply from his lips. He stares at the stars in content silence, all things pushed from his mind. He has long forgotten about the blond from first class.

That is, until he goes pelting past his bench, running across the deserted fantail. He halts only at the stern, when he collides with the base of the flagpole, clinging onto it and gasping for breath. Jack watches him watch the blackness of the Atlantic, sixty feet beneath them, then a cold horror wells in his chest as he watches him lean down and mechanically remove a shoe. He stands as the blond unlaces the other shoe, then begins to climb over the railing.

'Don't do it.' The blond stops, then looks over his shoulder.

'What?'

'Don't climb over.' He takes a step towards him, and the blond blinks.

'Stay back!' His voice quivers, and he lifts one leg over onto the other side.

'Please, you don't have to - ' The boy has climbed onto the other side, and he holds back a sigh, carefully edging closer.

'Here, just - take my hand. I'll pull you over.'

'Why would I? I don't know you. You don't me. You shouldn't even begin to presume what my life is like!'

'No, and I'm not,' He says, taking the tone of a diplomat, 'But I'm just... I'm concerned about the temperature of the water. It's cold, you know.' The blond is silent. Then, after a long pause,

'How cold?'

'Freezing. Maybe a couple degrees above, if you're lucky. And when you hit the water... It's like a thousand knives, hitting you all at once. You can't think of anything but the pain.'

'How would you know? Do you make a habit of swimming in the Atlantic ocean?'

'Do you make a habit of hanging off the back of ships?' Silence, and Jack slides a step closer. 'Come on.'

'You can't tell me what to do.'

'Well, I'm involved now. If you jump, I'm gonna have to jump in after you. And you know what I said about the water.'

'You wouldn't jump.'

'Watch me.' The blond scoffs, and Jack sighs, edging even closer, 'You don't want this. Just... take my hand.'

'Fine.' He gives in, and Jack pulls him over onto the deck once more. He stumbles, and they land in a tangled heap, and the blond's cheeks flush pink as he splutters something of an apology, mumbling incoherently about his clumsiness. Jack allows an easy smile when they untangle and stand, and he offers his hand again.

'I'm Jack. Jack Merridew.' The blond takes it, shakes it firmly. Professionally.

'Ralph Gornick.' He says softly, then turns away to collect his shoes. Jack allows himself to admire the blond below him when he smooths his hair back in place and pulls his shoes on. He was beautiful, aside from the way money makes one beautiful. Beautiful in the way that his Parisian boys were, god-like in their appearance, serene in their demeanor. Ralph glances up at him and smiles, just as someone calls his name. Jack looks around to see the same girl from earlier, night coat drawn tight around her thin figure.

'Ralph, sugarpea, what on God's Earth are you doing all the way out here?'

'Dorothy, darling. I was... I heard talks of dolphins, earlier today, and I was simply consumed by curiosity. I wanted to see if I could maybe spot one or two, swimming alongside the boat.

'At this hour? Jesus, Ralph, are you thick? You could've caught your death!' As if noticing Jack for the first time, she looks between them, 'And who is this?'

'Uh... Jack...'

'Merridew,'

'Jack Merridew, yes,' Jack takes off his cap and gives an exaggerated bow, and the girl curls her lip, a plucked brow raising, 'He was...'

'I was simply asking to bum a cigarette off him, and we started talking about... The ship. Your honey sure knows a lot about this liner.'

'I'm sure.' The girl says coolly, then turns to Ralph, 'Please, sugar, can we just go in? I'm freezing.'

'Of course, darling.' He takes her arm in his and heads away, then stops. 'Oh, Jack, wouldn't you please join me and some of my friends for lunch tomorrow? I'm sure they would all be as interested in everything you have to say as I have been.' Jack blinks, unable to recognize the weight in the question, but knowing it was there.

'Uh. Sure. Count me in.' He says carefully, and Ralph nods, satisfied, then turns to continue to head on his way.

 

x.x

 

For the first time in a while, Ralph finds himself appreciating the feel of the sun on his face as he walks down the deck with newfound purpose. He unlatches the gate to go down to the third class deck, all too award of the eyes on him. He rolls his shoulders and keeps his back straight and eyes ahead.

 

The room seems to be the social center of steerage. Vastly different than his own world, the room is full of noise - mothers with babies, running children.  
But the noise quiets when the first person notices him, and the whole room seems to notice as consequence. A domino effect of silent awe. Ralph looks down and swallows his embarrassment, reminding himself that it was no different than when everyone in the room looked at him and Dorothy during galas. Looking back up, he finds Jack looking up at him with similar awe. He gives him a small smile and heads straight for him.

'Hello, Jack.'

'Hello - again.'

'Uh. Yes. Of course. Um - after you.'

 

They walk side by side in the sun, and Ralph allows himself to tilt his face back and enjoy the warmth yet again. The silence isn't awkward, but it isn't pleasant, either. Eventually, his patience for it runs out and he stops, looking at the other boy.

'Jack, I - I feel like such an idiot. And a coward. It took me all morning to work the courage up to see you. I just... I want to thank you for not making such a big deal about... Last night. And... And I know what you must be think - poor little rich boy, right? What does he know about hardship and misery?' He gives a self-depreciating laugh, but Jack is silent, watching him intensely.

'Actually, I wasn't. I was thinking that... What hurt you so much that made you think you had no other way out?'

'It wasn't just one thing,' The next thing he knew, his emotions came out all in a jumbled mess, flustered under Jack's scrutiny, 'I just - It's this whole world! Their whole - prim and proper and polite and well-raised and - I had to get away. I had to run, and when there was no ship left, and I was at that rail... Even the Titanic wasn't big enough. I was - I was furious! I was angry and... and I hated them, and I hated myself, and - I would've shown them! They would've been... They would've been sorry!'

Ralph hangs his head and buries his face in his hands. 'God, I'm a fool.'

'That girl, Dorothy. Is she one of them?'

'Oh, her? She _is_ them. Well, her family is. My family is, too.'

'She your girlfriend?'

'Fiancee, actually. You should see the size of the diamond my family cooked up for it all.'

'So, you feel stuck, because you're marrying this girl,' Ralph nods, feels himself smiling broadly. Finally, someone was getting it, 'So don't.'

'It isn't that simple.' Ralph frowns again - once again, he was let down.

'It is!'

'You haven't seen my world, Jack.'

'Well, I will tonight.' A silence lapses, and Ralph scrambles for something else to talk about. He spots a leather bound book tucked under his arm and starts to make a grab for it.

'And what's this?'

'Oh, uh, just some crappy sketches.' Ralph manages to get the book, and he spots a flush crawling up Jack's neck as he opens the book, taking in the sketches as he lowers into a deck chair.

'These are... These are really good. They're - ' They were little snatches of life - an elderly woman's hands, wrinkled and roughed with years of work. A sleeping, shirtless man, face hidden in the pillow. A father and daughter, beaming and pointing at the heavens.

'Well, um, they didn't really think too much of them in  _Paree_.'

'You were in Paris?'

'For a time, yes.' Before Ralph can relate his own Parisian stories, a gust of wind steals some loose sketches, and Jack scrambles after them, only managing to catch two. They watch as the other two drift over the rail and into the ocean far below.

' _Shit_ \- I'm sorry!'

'Well... They didn't think too much of them in Paris.' Jack is looking at him strangely, but he crumples up the two sketches, and tosses them overboard. Ralph laughs, the sound genuine and loud.

'You're a mad man!'

'And you cursed.' Ralph flushes and goes back to the book, turning a page. The flush deepens when he takes in the series of nudes before him. 

'Well, well, well...' He clears his throat and raises the book, in case a passerby catches a glimpse, 'These were all done from real life?' Jack nods.

'Unsurprisingly, there's a great amount of girls willing to take their clothes off in Paris.'

'You used this woman a lot. You must of liked her.' Before he realizes what he's doing, he traces his finger along the waistline of one girl. He pulls his finger away and flushes darker. Jack's eyes on his face, but he nods.

'She had beautiful hands.'

'Surely that wasn't the only beautiful thing about her.' He looks up at Jack, but quickly looks away, surprised at the expression in his eyes. 'You must've had a love affair with her.' Jack laughs like it's the funniest thing he's ever heard.

'Just with her hands.' Ralph brushes a piece of hair behind his ear.

'You really do have a gift. You see things. You see people.' He risks looking back up at him again. He isn't sure if he regrets it or not.

'I see you.' It's the same gaze as earlier, seeming to pierce right through into his soul.

'And?' He asks, voice barely above a whisper.

'You wouldn't have done it.'

 

'And then what?' They stand together on the A-deck, leaning over the railing. Jack looks out at the ocean, his face painted in orange light.

'Logging got to be too much work, so I headed down to Santa Monica pier in Los Angeles to do portraits. Ten cents a piece.' He says in a proud tone, but Ralph blinks in surprise.

'A whole ten cents?'

'Yeah,' Jack presses his lips together and chews his nail, 'Sometimes I'd make more than a dollar a day. But only in the summer - when it got cold, I headed across to Paris to see what the real artists were doing.'

'Wow,' Ralph looks out at the sky, 'I wish I could be like you - starving, but free. It sounds terribly romantic - going wherever you'd like.'

'You wouldn't last two days - there's hardly any caviar, y'know.'

'Well, I guess it's good that I hate caviar.'

'Ralph,' He jumps, looks over Jack's shoulder to find his father standing behind him with a few other men.

'Oh! Father - this is Jack Merridew. He'll be dining with us this evening.' Jack turns to his father's scrutiny - the man looked at him like a insect - a dangerous one, that needed to be squashed in an instant.

'Charmed, I'm sure.' He says with a tight smile, and Jack nods at him. They all jump at the sound of a bugle, announcing dinner, and Jack laughs nervously.

'I don't know why they always insist on announcing dinner like a calvry charge.' Ralph smiles at him, and gently brushes past him.

'I'm going to go get dressed. See you at dinner, Jack.' He pauses before he says his name, adding emphasis on the single syllable. It might be his imagination, but Jack reaches out and briefly touches the small of his back as he passes, and he can feel the heat on the shell of his ears as he heads to his suite.

 

When he comes down the stairs to dinner, Dorothy on his arm, he almost stumbles when he catches sight of Jack, already waiting for him at the door.

'You clean up well, Mr. Merridew. I almost didn’t recognize you.' Dorothy takes another look and blinks in surprise.

'Wow. I didn't - you could almost pass as a true gentleman.'

 

Entering the dining room together, Ralph leans in to point out a few notables. At one point, he introduces him to a man and they have a brief conversation.

He must've been nervous, but he never faltered, and they all assumed he was one of them. Ralph admired him for his cool head, finding himself watching him with a small, fond smile.

 

After dinner, when Ralph stands to join the other men for brandies in the Smoking Room, he looks after Jack.

'Are you coming?'

'Actually, I'm feeling quite tired. I think I'll head back to my own kind, and go to bed,' He stands and nods to the others sitting, then offers his hand to Ralph to shake, 'If you'll excuse me.' Ralph feels the edge of a folded square of paper press into his palm, and when he smiles, pulling away from the handshake, he quickly puts the note into his pocket. 

'Well, goodnight then, Mr. Merridew.' He says, and heads into the Smoking Room, waiting until they're distracted to subtly read the note.

 _Meet me at the clock. Make it count_.

 

After making a vague excuse and excusing himself, he crosses the A-deck foyer, spotting Jack above him. He grins, feeling boyishly excited and rebellious as he climbs the sweeping staircase to him.

His back is to him as he studies the ornate clock with in a way that only an artist can, but when he clears his throat, he turns to him with a grin, hands in his pockets.

'How about I show you what a real party is like?'

 

x.x

 

Jack is used to the raucous nature of parties in the third class, but when he looks at Ralph, it's obvious he's swept up in it all - the music, the laughter, the dance.

He had managed to convince him to dance with him, their hands gripped together as they dance. If people notice the taboo of two men dancing together, no one mentions it. Jack wants to pull him closer, put his hand on his back or somewhere else and just...  _be close_ to him.

Then the song ends, and Ralph pulls away, giving him a huge smile as he pushes his hair from his face. It has become disheveled, and the strands quickly fall back into his eyes. Jack smiles nervously and brushes his hair behind his ear for him. The flush from activity deepens, and Ralph bites his lip, looking away.

'I'm gonna... I'm gonna go get something to drink,' He murmurs, and Jack nods, letting go of his hands.

 

Hours later, they sit out on the deck, right on the cold wood. Ralph's legs are crossed under him, and his arms wrapped around himself.

'Are you cold?' Ralph shrugs, and Jack allows himself to move closer. Ralph looks at him for a moment, then quickly up at the stars, biting his lip.

'You're nothing like those other stuck-up assholes.' Jack murmurs, and he finds himself watching how Ralph's Adam apple slides when he swallows, and he finds himself wanting to kiss his neck, feel the movement against his lips. Ralph hums and moves closer, lifting his shoulders to his ears, 'You're not one of them. There must've been a mistake. You got mailed to the wrong address.'

'A mistake?' Ralph looks back at him, then smiles, 'Yeah. I did, didn't I?' Jack leans in close, bumps his shoulder to his.

'You sure you're not cold?'

'Yeah,' Ralph looks away again, rubbing at the back of his neck. Jack swallows, then decides to take a risk. He says Ralph's name softly, and when he looks up at him, he takes his face in his hands and kisses the spot between his eyes.

'Goodnight.' He murmurs, rubbing his thumb over his jawline. Ralph pulls away and stares up at him with round eyes.

'Wh...?' Jack stands and quickly heads back in before he does something worse, leaving Ralph alone.

 

x.x

 

Ralph can't stop thinking of the feeling of Jack's lips on his forehead, but he forges on with his day.

Until Jack corners him in an empty room in the gymnasium, and he can't stop looking at his mouth.

'Jack, I can't - ' Jack steps closer, hand on his arms, ' - I can't see you.'

'Ralph, just... Just hear me out. You're no picnic. You're spoiled, you're a brat, and you're a downright  _asshole_ sometimes, but... But you're _strong_ , and your heart is... Wow. You're the most amazing, incredible boy I've ever known and - '

'Jack - '

'Let me finish. You're amazing, and I know that I have nothing to - to offer you, and we could never really - really be anything public. And I don't even know if... If you're interested in - ' He pauses, and Ralph wants to butt in, but he quickly starts again, 'But I'm involved now. You jump, I jump, remember? I can't turn away without knowin' if you're gonna be alright.'

'I'll be fine,' He manages. Jack is open and sincere and present - not like everyone he's ever known.

'I don't think so,' Jack's fingers brush over his jaw for a moment.

'It's not up to you to _save me_ , or whatever. I need to get back - they're gonna miss me. Please, for both of our sakes, leave me alone.'

 

He barely lasts an hour.

Ralph finds Jack on the deck, says his name softly. Jack spins around quickly.

'I uh. Changed my mind.' He says softly, and Jack grins, taking his hand. He starts to lean in, then Ralph remembers they're in public, right at the front of the boat, terribly terribly exposed, and he pulls back.

'Follow me.'

 

They're in his room when the door opens, and Dorothy calls his name. Ralph breaks away from Jack, chest heaving, and looks up at him, stricken.

'We need to - ' Jack nods and grabs his hand, opens the door and pulls him into the hallway. They run into an elevator and barely hold back from kissing again until they're taken down to the F-Deck.

It's silent, save for the electrical buzzing and the faint sounds of the boiler room. In silence, they walk hand in hand down the hall, biting back laughter. At the end of the hall, Jack pushes Ralph to the wall, hand on his waist.

'We really didn't need to go so far down, y'know.' He murmurs into his temple, nose sliding along his forehead. Ralph grins and sighs, head resting on the wall.

'Nobody's gonna find us down here. We could do fuck-all.' Jack snorts and kisses his temple, then looks up at the door beside them.

'Hey - we might as well go all out, huh?'

 

They run, laughing, among the cargo, as they leave the sweaty workers of the boiler room behind them. Ralph hugs himself against the cold, a stark contrast to the stifling heat of the boiler room, and Jack immediately notices, pulling him close.

Coming upon a beautiful Renault, Ralph momentarily forgets the cold and pulls himself up into the plushly upholstered back seat. Jack grins at him, then clambers into the driver's seat.

'Where to, sir?' Jack holds back his laughter as Ralph runs his index finger down his cheek, kissing his temple softly.

'The stars.' He pulls Jack into the backseat with him, mouth on his neck, on his shoulder. In the dark, their breaths seem alarmingly loud, and Ralph's hands are shaking when he slides them over Jack's arms.

'Are you nervous?'

'On the contrary,  _mon cher_ ,' Jack strokes his face, and Ralph steals his wrist, bringing his roughened fingertips to his lips, 'I meant what I said, Jack. I want to see stars.' Jack grins and kisses him, and he slides down in the seat, taking Jack's face in his hands.

 

Ralph tilts his head back to look at the streaky hand prints he left on the foggy car windows, laughing tiredly and dragging his hand down his face. Jack's nose presses into the crook of his neck and he smiles, hums in content.

'Are you alright?' He says, his voice muffled by his skin. Ralph looks down at him, then presses his cheek into his hair.

'Perfect,'

'Not too cold?' They're naked expect for Jack's coat, draped over them like a blanket. Ralph shrugs and slides his hand down the length of Jack's back, lingering at the base of his spine. He notices how he's shivering, and he pulls him closer, other arm draping across his shoulders.

'We could get dressed, y'know.'

'No. Just... Just a little longer.' Jack pulls back to look at him, eyes darting over his face.

'People think that we're going to dock by Tuesday.' He whispers finally, and Ralph blinks, not evening thinking about what might happen when they arrive in New York. Jack takes his face in his hand and shifts down to kiss his forehead, 'When we do, get off with me. We can.. We can find some way to work it out. We can get a flat together, live as... Live as bachelors for the rest of our lives. I know that I can't give you marriage, or anything public, or... Or...'

'I will.' Ralph whispers, and Jack looks down at him, stricken. Like he hadn't expected to convince him.

'You're crazy,' He says, also in a whisper, and he touches his jaw, kissing his temple, 'This is crazy.'

'I know. It doesn't make sense. But I trust it. I trust you.' Jack grins and kisses him possessively, rubbing his chest.

'I think that... That if we keep at it, I could love you.' Ralph pulls back and smiles up at him.

'I think that I could, too.' He murmurs, and Jack pulls back, looking at him like he's the most incomprehensible thing in the universe. He takes his face in his hands and rubs his thumbs over his cheekbones.

 

It feels like hours later when they finally part enough to redress, pausing every so often to kiss. They stand out by the car, just looking at each other, then Jack takes Ralph's hand.

'We should go.' He murmurs, kissing his forehead. He gently pushes him in the direction of the boiler room, and Ralph forces himself to draw away.

 

The night is frigid when they break out onto the deck, forcing themselves to keep away from one another. Jack pulls his cigarettes from his coat and sets one between Ralph's lips, lighting it for him.

Above them, the lookout bell is rung three times, making them jump. Ralph pulls back and looks up, squinting at the two men in the look out tower.

'What was that about?' Jack shrugs and lights a cigarette for himself.

'I dunno.' Ralph bites his lip and reaches for Jack for a moment, touching his forearm. The ship slowly turns, so they push to the rail.

'An iceberg,' Jack murmurs under his breath, and Ralph looks up.

'Will they get past?'

'I dunno. We're going pretty fast.' Ralph remembers his walks on the decks, how he had noticed how little lifeboats there were, and dread spreads in his chest.

 

The ships just skirts past the iceberg, large chunks skidding across the deck. Ralph pushes into Jack to avoid one, cigarette long fallen into the sea.

As soon as they clear from the berg, they both lean over the side, looking at the hull.

'You think it's alright?'

'Yeah. Probably just a scratch. I don't see anything.' Ralph leans back over and frowns up at him.

'Alright. Dorothy is probably looking for me.'

'Doro- you said you were done with her.'

'And I am. But I don't see any reason to start some big drama when we're still in the middle of the ocean. I'm still leaving with you.' Jack frowns, then glances at the lookouts, who seem to be wrapped up in something else, then brings him close, kissing his temple briefly. Ralph knows the danger, but wishes it were longer.

'Alright. I'll see you in the morning?'

'Of course,' Ralph turns back and walks back in the direction of his suite.

 

Things, as it turns out, were not alright.

Dorothy clings onto Ralph's arm, both of them bundled in their coats and life jackets, standing at the base of the stairs with a group of their first-class friends. He speaks to her in a low voice, tells her about the iceberg, and she looks up at him in horror.

'But it's the _Titanic_ ,' She whispers, 'It's unsinkable.'

'I hope so.' Across the room, he spots Mr. Andrews, and he brings Dorothy along with him.

'I saw the iceberg. And I see it in your eyes. Tell us the truth.' Mr. Andrews between from the two and frowns.

'The ship will sink,' He sounds defeated as he looks around the magnificent room, 'All of this will be at the bottom of the Atlantic in an hour or two.'

 

On the way up to the deck, Ralph can't think of anything but Jack. Where he was, if he was safe. Dorothy's hands are tight around his arms now as he shoulders through the crowd to get to a boat. Distantly, he hears a steward yelling about women and children, and looks down at Dorothy with a tight smile.

'Alright, darling,' He murmurs, gently pulling her hands from his arm, 'You'll be alright now. I'll see you soon.' Dorothy searches his face for a moment before pulling him into a hard kiss. It's all he can do not to shove her away, watching calmly when she climbs into the boat, one of the last before the lifeboat is lowered down from the boat. As soon as she's out of sight, he starts pushing forward again, calling Jack's name.

 

He's not sure how he hears him over the noise, but when Ralph stumbles across a pair of stewards struggling to close a gate, a mob of steerage passengers pushing at the other side, his eyes land on Jack, and he tries not to push the stewards out of the way as he comes up between them, reaching through the rungs. All of the people on the other side look terrified, and he knows it's reflected in his own eyes when he turns to a steward.

'Can't you let them out? There are children down there!' But the crewmen are scared, too. They let the situation get out of hand, and they could very easily have a mob on their hands now.

'It's hopeless,' Jack calls to him, and he looks back at him, eyes going round, 'Just... Just try and get to safety, okay? I won't skip out on you now.'

'Jack, please.' Their eyes meet, then Jack frowns.

'Alright. Alright - everyone get out of the way!' The sea of people part for him like the Red Sea, and Ralph watches him and two other men pull up a bench bolted down on the landing. They run up the steps with it, and Ralph pushes the stewards out of the way as they use it as a battering ram, the gate easily wrenched from its hinges and falling forward.

'If you have any intention of keeping your job, I'd suggest you lead these people up to the boat deck, now.' Ralph tells one of them with his best impression of his father, and the steward quickly nods, taking in the crowd before him.

 

On the deck, Jack holds Ralph's hand, hidden from sight in the folds of their coats, but he isn't nearly as close as he'd like. When he catches him looking at him, he smiles tersely.

'We'll be fine,' He murmurs, then leans closer, 'If there's only one spot left in a boat, I want you to take it.'

'I'm not going to leave without you.'

'Don't be ridiculous, Ralph.'

'No!' Some people look around at them, and he lowers his voice stepping closer, 'You jump, I jump. We stay together.' Jack holds his gaze in silence for a long time, then adjusts his life jacket for him.

'Alright.'

 

By the time all of the boats have gone, they're still there. Ralph's hand is sweaty, but it's the only part of him that's warm. Jack laces his fingers through his and starts walking, pulling him along with him.

'We gotta move up. We need to stay on this ship for as long as we can.' They push through the crowd, making it to the stern as the angle increases. They struggle to hold onto the stern rail as the deck splits in half. The ship seems to right herself, and there's a chorus of relief through the crowd as Jack grimly shakes his head.

'We need to move.' He whispers, already starting to climb over the rail as the weight of the flooded bow lifts the stern rapidly, the fantail lifting again. Ralph freezes where he is as Jack grabs for him, pulls him over the rail. He comes over just as the deck goes vertical, clinging to the other side. Forgetting himself, Jack kisses his forehead and squeezes his arm, then grips him fiercely.

'This is where we met,' Ralph tries to laugh, but it comes out more of a sob. The stern stills, bobs in the water, and Jack kisses his temple multiple times. How long ago it all seemed. That first night they met - Hell, even the car seemed like decades ago.

Finally, the stern begins it's final descent into the ocean, and Jack seizes Ralph's hand tightly.

'Listen to me, Ralph. I want you to take a deep breath and hold it just as we hit the water. The ship _will_ suck us down, and I want you to kick as hard as you can, and keep kicking. Don't let go of my hand - we're gonna make it, baby, trust me.'

'I trust you.' Together, they watch the stern ascend into the rolling sea, and then they are swallowed with the rest of the ship.

 

Together, they finally break the surface, gasping among a throng of people now floating where the Titanic once lay. It's a boom of noise and struggling bodies.

'We need to get out of this crowd,' Jack does most of the work, his strokes cutting more effectively through the water than Ralph's own, inhibited by the life jacket.

They break out from the crush, and Ralph immediately shuts down.

'It's so cold,' He murmurs distantly, and Jack nods, lifting out of the water and craning his neck.

'I know, love, I know. Help me, look for something floating. We need to get out of the water.'

'What's that?' He looks along his arm when he points at something floating in the water, and they make towards it together. It's a piece of door, thick and intricately carved. Jack pushes Ralph up onto it, and he shifts to the side to make room for him, then he climbs up himself, rolling onto his back.

'C'mere,' He murmurs, and Ralph rolls into his arms, shivering desperately, 'I need you to stay awake for me, baby. Can you do that?' Ralph nods distantly, watching their breaths cloud around them.

 

They drift together under the stars, and Ralph stares into space as Jack rubs his back.

'It's getting quiet,' He murmurs. His tongue feels thick in his mouth.

'Just a few more minutes... T-they're probably still organizing the boats.' Ralph doesn't move - he knows the truth. No boats were coming, 'And I don't know about you, but I'm going to write a very strongly worded letter to White Star Line after this.' He laughs weakly and pushes his cheek into his chest.

'I love you,' He whispers, and Jack frowns.

'Don't say your goodbyes, Ralph, okay? We're out of the water, we're gonna make it. _You're_ gonna make it,' Ralph looks up at him, and nods, teeth chattering endlessly, 'Okay? The boats are gonna come back for us, and we're gonna grow old together in New York. Just like we talked about in the car. Remember the car?' He's talking to keep himself busy, Ralph knows, and forces himself to listen.

'Yeah,' He murmurs, and Jack kisses his temple.

'Winning that ticket is the best thing that ever happened to me.'

 

Ralph sings quietly under his breath as he watches Jack's face, makes sure that he can still see the cloud of his breath, that Jack squeezes back when he squeezes his hand, terrified of nothing but the very real possibility of losing him. Suddenly, there's a light, flaring in his face, and he sits up, hand tightening around Jack's, the reply a faint shift of fingers around his. Ralph waves fiercely with his free hand, calling out as loud as he can manage, his voice hoarse and sticking to his throat. There's the sound of shouts and oars pushing through water, pushing aside bodies, and then he is lifted into the boat.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i cut out a lot of the Iconic scenes and it Physically Hurt but uh  
> i had to
> 
> i left the ending kinda ambiguous so if u wanna think that they lived happily ever after u do u m8


	48. XLII

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> an exercise i like to call I Went Through A List of Kinks And Tried To Get As Many Of Them As I Could Get In This
> 
> (includes, but not limited to : filming, blindfolding, praise kink, bondage, some crying, overstimulation and uh. surprises)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just uhhh some rager (with mentioned jalger) wit rlly dominant roger for uh. Reasons.
> 
> i wanted to post something but my requests lookin dry af
> 
> pls send me requests im dying squirtle

Ralph watches Roger in obedient silence as the other boy tugs at his bindings, testing them.

'That too tight?' Ralph shakes his head and rolls his wrists forward, tugging at them himself, 'Lean forward for me, baby. I wanna see how far you can go.' Ralph slowly sinks forward as he's asked, lifting his gaze to meet Roger's.

'Perfect,' He murmurs, hands on his cheeks, 'Now, I'm gonna blindfold you and start the camera. You ready?'

'Yeah,'

'Colour?'

'Green.'

'Good boy.' Ralph knows he can see his cock twitch at the praise, but he stays silent. Roger picks up the silk tie, runs the length of material down the inside of his arm first, to let him feel. Ralph shivers, a small noise coming from somewhere in his chest. Roger runs his thumb along the soft skin of his undereye, then he presses the tie over his eyes. Ralph lets his head fall forward so he can tie it in place, then lifts his face back towards him.

'Will you be a good boy for me, pretty boy?' He whispers, smoothing the edge of the tie down.

'Yes,'

'Yes what?'

'Yes, Sir.' Roger hums, dropping his hand to rest on his abdomen, just over his abdomen. Then, he stands, and Ralph whines, immediately straining forward against his restraints.

'Relax, dearest. I'm just getting the camera.' Ralph is suddenly glad that Jack left behind his good camera, squirming when chimes to life, biting his lip when he registers the whirring as it's zoomed in.

'Perfect. Breathtaking.' Roger murmurs to himself, just loud enough for him to hear, and Ralph flushes, looking away and lifting his hips, spreading his legs in what he hopes is an enticing manner.

'Sir,' Ralph can hear the whine in his tone, but he's beyond caring.

'Mhm?'

'Please, touch me, take me, use me. I need you.' Roger shushes him, the sound coming closer as he closes the distance.

'I have a couple of presents for you. Open your mouth, lovely.' Ralph does as he’s bidded, and he doesn’t flinch when Roger spits into his mouth. He misses half of his mouth, and spreads the spit across his chin, pushing three fingers into his mouth. Ralph doesn't pull back or flinch, even when Roger presses in too far to be comfortable.

'Who do you belong to, lovely?' Ralph answers, his words garbled by his fingers and the extra spit in his mouth. He hums, still pleased, fingers curled against his tongue before they're pulled away slowly. He pauses for a moment, then there's the sound of a phone being set down on the bedside table. After a moment, there are several chimes, and Ralph immediately moves to pick up the phone, forgetting about his current position for a moment. Roger kisses his temple and runs his wet fingers down his chest.

'I wanted Jack to see what he was missing,' He murmurs in explanation, and Ralph can't deny that his cock twitches at the idea of doing it again, making Jack watch, not allowing him to join. Roger tweaks his nipple, and he arches off the bed, thoughts of Jack quickly pushed from his mind.

'Fuck. No one has ever - '

'You like it?' The pad of his thumb ghosts over his nipple in tight circles, and he nods, arching up further.

'Yes, Sir,' Instead of answering, Roger bends, his tongue warm and wet on his other nipple. Ralph whimpers, chin dropping forward.

'Hang on - ' Roger is gone again, and there's a rustling of a plastic bag across the room. He's back, and several objects are dropped onto the bed beside Ralph. ' - Okay. I told you I had some presents for you, yes?' Ralph nods, and there’s the clinking of a delicate chain. 'These are nipple clamps. Colour?'

'Yellow,' Ralph hesitates before saying it, and Roger hums, fingers smoothing over his chest.

'How about I put one on for you and we'll see how it feels?' Ralph nods, 'If you don’t like it, I won't bring it back. Promise.’

'I trust you.' He gasps as Roger sets one in place, screwing it tighter until Ralph is squirming.

'Colour?' He murmurs, lifting his hands away. Ralph shifts under him, biting his lip as the chain shifts, jerking the clamp.

'Put the other one on?' Roger does as he asks, and Ralph lets out a shaky moan when he lifts the chain and gives a hesitant, testing tug, 'Green. Definitely green.' Roger kisses his temple, hands off him again, although he talks softly.

'You're such a good boy for me, dearest. So open to new things. So willing.'

'I want you to be proud of me,'

'I am, beautiful, I'm so proud.' His thumb  presses to his nipple, and Ralph cries out, hips buck up against his thigh.

After a moment, Ralph hears a brief part of the conversation replay above him before it cuts off, and Roger kisses him again, setting his phone back down. Another series of chimes, and Roger laughs softly against his lips, fingers smoothing through his hair.

'I want to try something else, too, okay?'

'What?'

'Well, when I'm done with you, I wanna come in your mouth, so I obviously gotta last. And so I thought... What about a dildo?' Ralph whimpers and nods, immediately lifting his hips further. 'Yeah? I knew you'd be into it. And, while we're at it...' He pauses, reaches across his chest, then switches something on. Ralph can hear the buzzing before he feels it, pressed to his bottom lip. 'How many orgasms do you think you can give me, beautiful boy?'

 

Roger has taped the vibrator to his cock, and it vibrates softly, right against the head. Ralph knows it would be a slow mount to his first orgasm, maybe agonizingly so. If Roger decided to be cruel.

Before he had settled between his thighs, he had fiddled with the camera, trying to find a better angle for what was about to happen. Currently, he's working on preparing him, and Ralph has to wonder if the dildo he brought was so much bigger than what he was used to that he had to spend so much time doing so. Not that he’s complaining.

He hadn't even started to use his fingers yet, though Ralph can feel the cold of the lube resting against his hip. His tongue is pressed against him, another feeling Ralph has never experienced. He wishes he could at least see him, and he tilts his head back, trying to see from under the tie. Roger pushes his tongue into him, barely able to ease past the tight ring of muscle.

'Fuck, lovely, you’re so tight. Can you relax for me?' His hand rubs over his abdomen, and Ralph whines, focusing on doing as he's asked. Roger's tongue swipes over the entrance a few more times before he tries again, humming in approval, reaching up and tugging at the chain of the nipple clamps, making him whimper softly.

'And how's that going?'

'Sore. Will I be able to wear a shirt tomorrow?' Roger looks up and winces.

'I dunno, love. I'd keep them off, just to be safe. And your cock is gonna be pretty sore, too. I say just stay naked for the rest of the weekend.' Ralph laughs, the sound a bit strained when Roger's thumb runs over the head of his cock. It's so brief that it could very well be accidental. But Ralph knew Roger, knew his method.

'You know you could make the vibrator go harder, right? I don’t even notice it anymore.' It was a lie, but he applauds himself for sounding so calm. The head of his cock pulses uncomfortably - the stimulation that the vibrator gave him was just not enough, keeping him securely on the cliff, a safe distance from the edge.

'I know.' Roger says simply, giving him a sharp tug on the chain, making him cry out. 'And don't use that tone with me. You're not in charge here.'

'Yeah but - ' Roger sighs, then the vibrator is brought up a level or two. Ralph hangs his head, sensing the annoyance and dissapointment, rolling off Roger in waves. 'Thank you, Sir.' He whispers meekly, and Roger sighs again.

'I'm going to take the clamps off now,' Ralph starts to object, then remembers himself, 'It'll hurt just as much as when I put them on. More, probably, because of how long they've been on. Your nipples are purple.' Ralph nods quickly. 'Okay. Ready for the first one?' Ralph nods again, and he counts down from five. On two, he takes the first clamp off quickly, kissing the abused nipple as soon as he does, making sure to hold the chain so it doesn’t add more strain on the remaining clamp. Again, he counts down from five, removing the other clamp on three. Ralph lets out a sob, shifting away from his touch.

'Colour?' Roger whispers against his ear, and there's no hint of the annoyance from earlier, 'We can take a break, and let you recover a bit.' Ralph nods, and the vibrator switches off immediately, the tie pushed from his eyes to hang around his neck. Roger kisses him quickly, and he smiles loosely.

'This is really good,' He croaks, and Roger nods, 'Thank you for doing this for me.' He settles back against the headboard, glancing down at his chest.

'You want some ice?'

'No. Just give me a minute to catch my breath. Tell me your plans?'

'That would ruin the surprise, love.'

 

When Ralph is ready to continue, Roger replaces the tie and turns the vibrator back on, but doesn't return to his place between his legs yet, whispering against the shell of his ear in a hot whisper.

'To get you ready, I want to get my whole hand in you. Start with one finger and work my way up. Would you like that?' Ralph moans, the sound pathetic and plaintive. He isn't really listening to him, focused more on the feeling of his breath on his neck, vibrator doing it’s job much better than before. 'Yeah? Turn you into more of a mess than you already are - moaning and begging like the good little slut you are.' Ralph moans at that, slumping forward again, straining against his bonds.

Roger kisses him quickly, then moves down his body, pressing brief little pecks as he moves. Finally, he gets to where he wants to be, nose resting in the hollow of Ralph's hipbone.

'You're such a pretty little thing. No wonder Jack likes to do this so often,' He whispers, uncapping the lube and spreading it over his hand. Ralph listens to the slick sound of his hands moving together, then the lube is cold on his entrance, making him gasp and roll his hips up. Roger rubs at him for a moment, then eases his middle finger into him, free hand resting on his abdomen.

'Lift your hips for me, love.' He murmurs, wedging a shoulder under his thigh when he does, so Ralph is curled up awkwardly, grasping the headboard for additional support.

'I'm close,' He breathes, and Roger hums, kissing the inside of his thigh.

'I know, baby boy. I'll take care of you.' Another finger is added, and he crooks them inside him, pressing against his prostate. Ralph keens, the heel of his foot pressing into the small of his back.

'Can I come, Sir?' He manages, chest heaving. Roger doesn’t answer for a long moment, kneading his prostate as he considers. Ralph lets out a strangled noise, hand colliding with the wall as he arches up into him, toes curling in, teeth gritted. Roger watches him, enraptured by the beauty of the boy beneath him.

'Come for me, lovely.' He says finally, and Ralph does so with a loud, hoarse cry, spilling unbidden into the hollow of his stomach as he struggled for breath. Roger kisses along his thigh, waiting for him to calm down slightly.

'Colour?'

'Green,' He whispers faintly. Roger kisses his temple and eases his fourth finger into him.

'You're so perfect, Ralph. I can't believe that you're so willing to try things,' Ralph's nose rests against one of Roger's dimples and he lets out a shaky moan, 'Is four fingers too much? You want me to - '

'No. No, I like - I like feeling your hand in me like this.' Roger twists his wrist so his thumb presses against the shaft of his cock, which is still twitching from the orgasm and the constant vibration. He kisses his cheek softly, working him up again easily.

'That's good. 'Cause I like feeling how tight you are, stretched around me so nicely.' Ralph arches up off the bed as Roger sits back, free hand on his cock. With three fingers, he gives the head of his cock a brief pinch, and he sobs, conflicted in moving away or into the quick, harsh tugs.

'Fuck,' He says thickly, and Roger kisses his temple.

'If you need to come again, you can.' By the sound of his voice, Ralph can tell he's focused entirely on his ministrations. Not that he's complaining. 'But I'm gonna take this off, it's getting in my way.'

Ralph isn't sure to object or thank him when the vibrator is turned off, the tape carefully pulled from his pulsing head. There isn't much reprieve, however, as Roger's hand wraps around his shaft, stroking him with even, brisk movements.

'Fuckin' hell - ' Ralph moans, coming again. It isn’t as satisfying this time, and Roger slowly eases his hand from inside him, other hand moving to press down on his abdomen.

'Colour?' Ralph isn't really focused on Roger at the moment - just the way his hand moves on him. He could feel it in him, but that could just be the aftershocks. He lets out a distant noise, 'Ralph,'

'Can we just... Take a breath for a sec?' Roger is silent for a moment, then settles down beside him.

'Blindfold off?'

'No,' Ralph turns his face towards his voice, leaning forward. He finds his neck, presses his face into the warmth of his skin, 'Just... Talk to me. Tell me how I'm doing.'

'Oh, baby, you're doing amazing. Perfect. _So_ fucking good - you're so willing to try what I want to try, you're so good at taking everything I give you. And you haven't complained, haven’t whined. You're such a good boy, Ralph.' His lips press to his temple, and Ralph finds himself smiling brightly at the praise, humming in pride and appreciation. Roger's hand drifts through his hair, fingers swirling distractedly in the drying come on his stomach. 'And you look incredible, too. All sweaty, covered in your own come... Just wait to see what I’ve got planned for you, darling boy.'

 

Roger has introduced more rope into the mix, binding Ralph's calves to his thighs and keeping his legs open.

He doesn’t move, though, kneeling at the foot of the bed. One of his hands is on Ralph's ankle, thumb rubbing along the instep of his foot as he watches him shift in anticipation.

'Okay,' He says finally, moving, 'We're almost done. I just want one more orgasm from you - can you do that?' Ralph whimpers at the thought of doing more, his cock sore and limp against his hipbone. Still, he nods, and Roger kisses his heel, leaning over him. There's the sound of the cap of the lube being popped, then slick sound of his hand pumping over something, and Ralph lifts his hips in answer, expecting the warmth of his own cock, lining up against his entrance, assuming he had forgotten about his earlier mentioned desire to come in his mouth. Instead, the cold, unnatural feeling of a dildo is there instead of Roger, and Ralph gasps, the sound a little wounded.

'I'm gonna go in slow, but don't worry. I know how you like to be fucked.' The gasp is drawn out into a moan as he melts against his restraints, the toy sliding in with no resistance. Roger stops when the toy is taken in up to the hilt, then the weight of him at the end of the mattress is relieved, and Ralph sits up, sluggish pleasure forgotten.

'I'm just gonna let you tighten up around this, just to make sure you feel the ribs. I'll be right back.' The door opens, and Ralph tugs at his restraints, calling his name in confusion as he shifts against the toy, which he know notices is thicker and longer than both Roger and Jack.

Roger returns silently, the lip of a glass pressed to Ralph's lips, making him jump.

'Drink. It's water.' Not noticing how parched he was, Ralph does as he's told, eagerly swallowing and coughing when Roger tilts the cup too far back. Water runs down the sides of his face, but Roger doesn’t wipe his mouth for him. 'You'll get messier soon,' He murmurs in explanation, and returns to his former position. There’s the sound of a picture being taken on his phone, then a pleased hum over the clicking of a message being sent. Roger finally takes the hilt of the dildo in his hand, lifting Ralph's hips in the air to fuck the toy into him. It seems to hit Ralph's prostate on each stroke, and he is soon reduced to a moaning mess, grabbing at the headboard and chanting Roger’s name through heaving sobs, the orgasm dry and painful. Roger pushes his hair from his forehead and sinks down, covering his face in kisses and mouthing down his throat.

'You did so well, so fucking good.' He kisses him again, gently untying the blindfold and kissing along his lids. 'We can stop here if you want, I wouldn't mind,' Ralph shakes his head quickly, and Roger smiles, rubbing along his hip.

'No. No, I want to make you feel good, too.'

'Alright.' Roger unties his legs, helping him lower them to the mattress and massaging the back of each knee. Then he lets down his wrists, kissing the bruises left from the straining of his arms. Ralph rolls his shoulders as he sits up, stiffly lowering himself onto the floor. His hands run up his thighs slowly, then he pulls his belt open, then tugs his fly down. Roger does most of the work for him, pushing his jeans down around his thighs and pulling his hardened cock from his briefs, standing for him. He rests a hand on the back of his head, waiting for Ralph to meet his eyes before speaking softly.

'I wanna fuck your mouth. Make you cry a bit - you're already pretty ready to, I can see the tears in your eyes. You're so fucking pretty when you cry, baby.' Ralph nods, lifting his chin and watching him through his lashes.

'Where do you want my hands, Sir?' Ralph smiles when his cock twitches at the title, and Roger's face shifts slightly.

'Behind your back, baby boy,' He murmurs.

'Can I touch you, Sir? If I want?' Roger pauses, then shakes his head, and Ralph nods, hands folding behind his back. He opens his mouth and Roger presses his thumb against his tongue, pressing in and taking hold of his chin, lifting his face more.

'If I go too hard, touch me to let me know, alright beautiful?' Ralph nods, lips wrapping around his thumb as he pulls back. Then, he opens his mouth again, shifting forward so his knees touch his toes. Roger takes hold of his face, rubbing his thumb over his cheekbone.

'I want you to go hard, Sir, and use my throat as a toy.' He whispers, cheeks burning. Roger bites his lip, taking his length in hand.

'Naughty boy,' Roger's voice is already hoarse as he slides into his open mouth, pushing forward until Ralph coughs, fingers curling behind his back, stalling like that for a moment. He grabs the back of Ralph's head in both hands and pulls him closer, and Ralph meets his eyes through the first few tears, blinking hard.

'Let them fall,' Roger commands, easing back. Before Ralph can reply, he's pushing back into his mouth, using his head to pull him forwards and push him backwards. The first tears fall as he coughs around him, trying to ease back as he gives quick little thrusts, already pushed all the way into his mouth.

Suddenly, Roger is pulled all the way out, and Ralph takes the opportunity to gasp for breath, coughing as he leans forward, cheek pressed to his hipbone.

'Colour?' Roger murmurs, and Ralph smiles sleepily, kissing his hipbone softly.

'Green,' He sits back on his heels and smiles up at Roger, 'Thank you for asking, baby.'

'Of course,' Roger rests the head of his cock against his tongue, sliding into his mouth slowly. He braces his hand against the base of his neck, fingers tight in his hair. Ralph hums around him, lips wrapping around his shaft, taking him in more, until the head of his cock is against the back of his throat. Tears blur his vision and he coughs, but he doesn’t pull back. Roger's hand moves to his chin  and lifts his face to him.

'You are the prettiest fuckin' thing I've ever seen,' He murmurs, 'Look up at me, baby boy, show me those pretty eyes of yours.' Roger picks up his phone, shakily unlocking it. Ralph looks to the camera, cheeks hollowing around his cock as he lets tears fall. Roger curses softly, thrusts  into his mouth until he coughs loudly, pulling off, swallowing the extra spit and looking back up at him, and Roger lowers the phone, pushing his hair from his face.

'Hold your tongue out,' He murmurs, pumping his hand over himself. Ralph does as he's told, closing his eyes in preparation when Roger lets out a long low moan, coming across his face, falling back onto the bed, and Ralph follows him, nuzzling his cheek into his thigh.

'I love you,' He whispers, and Roger runs a hand through his hair, smiling fondly.

'Come up here, lie down. I'll clean you up.' Roger stands again, turning off the camera and disappearing into the hall as Ralph tiredly crawls up into bed, dropping onto his back, closing his eyes.

He doesn’t hear Roger come back in, but there’s suddenly a warm cloth on his face, gently wiping the come from his skin, then Roger's lips press to his temple.

'I'm so proud of you for doing all that, Ralph.' He whispers, and Ralph smiles, taking his free hand as he cleans his stomach off for him. 'And you're sure you're fine?'

'Just tired,' Ralph whispers, pressing his face into his hair as he climbs on top of him.

'Alright. Get some rest, baby. You deserve it.'

'Thank you for spending so much time doing that for me,' Ralph whispers weakly, easily giving into the warmth of Roger's body, falling asleep before Roger can answer.


	49. XLIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an anon requested a thing where peeps kiss in the rain then do the fucc n succ but they didn’t elaborate BUT someone else wanted more ralger soooo
> 
> (also im on a ralger Kick all the wips i have here are ralger so. wouldve done it anyways)

Roger is so wet that he doesn’t even feel the rain anymore.

He sits huddled on the curb, and he knows he's getting sick just by being out in nothing but a jumper.

 

He doesn’t know how long he’s been sitting there when a car pulls up close to him, and the window is opened.

'Rodge?' He squints up into the pelting air to make out Ralph, leaning out of the window, 'Jesus Christ. Okay. Get in.'

'But your car - '

'I don't care about my car, it's fucking freezing!' Reluctantly, Roger climbs to his feet and pulls the door to the backseat open, climbing in. Ralph twists in his seat, frowning.

'You could sit up front, you know. I have heated seats up here.'

'It's fine.' It was bad enough that it was  _Ralph_ of all people who found him like this, he didn't want to be so close to him, dripping and shivering and twice as miserable as he usually is. There's the sound of a zipper being pulled down, then Ralph's coat is dumped into his lap.

'Put this on.' The car starts up again, and Ralph mutters under his breath, hands tight around the wheel.

'Fucking asshole. Fucking piece of - shit. Asshole. Prick. Dickhole. Fuck.' Roger leans forward quietly, the coat too tight to move comfortably.

'It's okay, Ralph, really - '

'No the fuck it's not, Roger! It's not! It's not fucking okay, stop - stop excusing that piece of shit. You need to get out of that house.' The last bit is muttered, because they've had this conversation before. Roger sighs and rests his cheek on the headrest. He stares at the back of Ralph's neck, feels the immeasurable desire to press a kiss to the mole right at his hairline.

'You don't have to get so worked up about it.' He murmurs instead, and Ralph slows to a stop, twisting to look at him.

'I do, Rodge. I do. Because - because. Because I care about you and I care about your fucking well being, Roger. And - and if I don't, who will?'

'At least - at least relax.' Ralph's face softens, and he twists more in his seat.

'No one deserves you.' He whispers, hands going lax around the wheel. Ralph shifts forward, bends in. Their lips are about to meet when someone blares their horn, and he springs away, turning back to the road. He curses under his breath and starts driving again, hunching his shoulders to his ears.

'Fuck. Fuck fuck _fuck_ ,' He whispers, then their eyes meet in the rear-view, his face scarlet. He opens his mouth to speak, but then quiets, the sound of rain lashing against the windshield the only sound in the car.

 

Ralph pulls into his driveway, and he pauses, resting his head against the steering wheel, fingers tightening around it again. Then he pulls his safety belt free and climbs out, face still bright scarlet. Roger scrambles out after him, chest squeezing in on itself.

'Ralph, wait.'

'Can it just wait until we're inside? It's - ' As soon as Ralph turns to him, Roger grabs him and pulls him close, kissing him. Rain water runs down their faces, and into their mouths, but he pushes forward, pressing Ralph against his car. Ralph goes lax in his arms and reaches up, grabbing for his face. He hums into the kiss and pulls him down, arms wrapping around his neck.

Finally, he pulls away and blinks up at him in the rain, a small, relieved smile flashing across his face.

'You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that.' He whispers, pushing the wet hair from Roger's face. Roger gives him a nervous smile, then rests his nose against his wet temple.

'Why the wait?'

'I was scared.'

'Of what?'

'I don't - know.' Ralph kisses him again, quickly, then laughs nervously. 'You're gonna catch your death out here. Uh - we should - ' He points his thumb to the front door, then takes his hands, pulling him up the porch steps and into the house. He looks over Roger once the door is shut and locked behind them, pushing his hair from his face with a smile.

'God, I didn't even notice how soaked you are.' He unzips his coat and pushes it off his shoulders. Roger flushes when he presses his hands to his stomach, sinking to his knees. He pulls the knots in his shoes free, then pulls them off, rubbing his thumbs over the balls of his feet. 'Do you want tea? It'll warm you up. Or... There's other ways to warm you up.'

'L... Like what?'

'Well, we have,' Ralph rests his nose against his kneecap, taking his hands, 'A very nice fireplace in the sitting room. Or I can bring down a couple of my dad's good blankets for you - they're soft. Faux fur,' His fingers press over the skin of his wrists, 'I suggest all three. And I also suggest that you get out of these wet clothes - you'll warm up faster.'

'I... I think that's a good idea, too. Could you... Could you give me a hand?' Ralph smiles and stands, then plants a kiss to his Cupid's bow.

'Gotta get the fire going, and the kettle on, hon. And get the blankets. You're on your own for that bit.'

 

When Ralph finally comes back into the living room with two steaming mugs, Roger has his back to him. He makes sure to walk quietly, pausing to watch him. He's got a blanket wrapped tightly around himself, his knees pulled to his chin. As far as Ralph can tell he's naked, and he hums softly.

'I feel quite overdressed right now.' He says softly, and Roger looks up quickly, wetting his lips.

'You're beautiful.' His voice is hoarse, and Ralph smiles, lightly setting the mugs down.

'Drink your tea, love.' Roger holds the blanket open, and Ralph pauses to pull his jumper off and push down his trousers, climbing into his lap. Roger pushes his nose into the crook of his neck and hums.

'You're warm,' He mumbles, arm circling around his waist. Ralph tugs away and turns in his lap, smiling and running his hand down his cheek.

'You'll be warm too, if you drink your fucking tea.' Roger reluctantly picks up a mug, and Ralph takes the edges of the blanket from him, wrapping it around the two of them.

 

It takes Roger a long time to drink the tea, and by the time he's finished, Ralph feels him through both of their briefs, hard against the back of his thigh. When Roger finally sets the empty mug down, Ralph lets out a noise of relief, grinding back against him.

'Finally. That was torture.' He murmurs, and Roger's hands are tight around his waist.

'Imagine what it was like for me. Having you in my lap, looking like you do. Watching me like that.'

'Like what?'

'Like I'm something you can't wait to get your hands on.'

'You are,' Ralph bends down and kisses the corner of his mouth. Roger pushes his face into his hair and curses under his breath.

'Take the rest of your clothes off.' He all but orders, and Ralph pulls back, a surprised smile playing over his features.

'You're bossy,' He says, and Roger flushes, looking away. Ralph smiles and brushes his fingertips over his jaw, kissing his forehead before moving away, tugging his briefs down and tossing them away. Then, he works Roger's briefs off, openly staring at his cock in appreciation. Roger shifts in discomfort, looking away.

'Is it gross or something? Why are you staring like that?' Roger moves to cover himself, 'Look, if you’re disappointed or something, I-I-I'm sorry, I can just - '

'You're beautiful. Perfect. Better than I could've imagined.' Roger blinks, looking back up at him.

'Really?'

'Yeah. If I could, I'd never stop looking at you.' He presses his arm across his back and pulls him in, kissing him firmly. 'I can’t wait for you to fuck me,' He whispers, watching as his cock jumps. Roger curses, and Ralph sits back, reaching for his jeans, rifling through the pocket.

'I got this from my room.' A bottle of lube is dropped into Roger's lap, and he flushes, 'I want you to get me ready.' He lifts his hips up, and Roger clumsily pours  lube onto his fingers, reaching under him and blindly feeling for his entrance. Ralph hums when his finger eases into him, eyes closing and lips pushing into a thin line.

'I'm not very good a-at all of this stuff. Out of practise.' Ralph hums again, pitching forward to rest his cheek in his hair.

'Shh. Stop talking - it feels really nice.' Roger nods and does as he's told, tilting his head back to watch Ralph's face. He presses a second finger into him, and Ralph whimpers, hips rolling back against his hand.

'Is this okay?' He whispers, and Ralph hums and nods, eyes still closed. He makes a careful scissoring motion, and Ralph tightens around him, cursing under his breath.

'That's... that's really fucking good, keep doing that,' His voice is barely above a whisper, hoarse and needy and breaking when Roger presses further up into him.

'More?' Ralph nods briskly, seeming to be unable to do much more, already reduced to moans and incoherent sweet mumbling. Roger adds a third and final finger into him, letting him fuck himself on his hand. Ralph lets out a shuddering gasp, kissing his temple hurriedly as he grabs at his shoulders, riding his hand with urgency. He whispers Roger's name over and over, then quiets suddenly. Roger looks up to watch as his mouth drops open, then closes again, teeth pushing into his bottom lip. Roger eases his fingers from him, and he whimpers at the loss, slumping into him. He breathes heavily, struggling to calm down, his arms around his neck.

'I'd love to see what you're like when you're not out of practice, because... _Fuck_.' Roger kisses his temple, rubbing the small of his back.

'Does this mean you want this to be more than just one night?'

'Yes. Yes. Of course, baby. I wanna... I wanna be with you.' His fingers push through his damp hair again.

'I want that, too.' Ralph grins, then laughs loudly, and the reaction is enough to make Roger want to bring him to the floor and just hold him, ensure he was as warm and loved as he deserved to be. He leans up, kisses him gently, then rests his forehead on his shoulder. Ralph moves closer, fingers sliding into his hair as he cradles him close.

'I really like you,' He whispers, and Roger hums, mouths at his shoulder, 'Fuck me?'

 

After some fumbling, Ralph finally sinks down onto him, moaning softly as he does. He kneels over him, straddling his waist, to get better leverage.

'You gonna move?' Roger grits out, and Ralph smiles, leaning over to mouth at his temple.

'When I feel like it, sure.' Roger groans and pulls him closer, pushing his hips up.

'Ralph, please. You're gonna drive me mad.' Ralph grins and bites at the shell of his ear. Slowly, he rolls his hips forward, fingers sinking into his hair. Roger lets out his breath in a hiss, fingers digging into his hips.

'That's the point. Drive you so crazy you forget how cold you are.' He whispers, and Roger shudders, the mere mention of the cold bringing the chill back. Ralph leans down and pushes his cheek into his hair, next to his hand. He moves lazily, movements languid and unhurried. He's already short of breath, most of the noises he makes are moans and gasps. He grabs his shoulder and ducks his head, pushing his face into his neck.

'You're amazing.'

'This is amazing,' He whispers hoarsely, 'This is so fucking good. I love this. This feels really nice,' He breathes, pressing his body against him and kissing his jaw. Roger turns his face into his, rubbing his nose along the curve of his ear. His hips snap up into him and Ralph's voice pitches, goes hoarse. He curses, nails sinking into his back. Ralph raises up further on his knees, pulling back and taking his face in his hands, eyes roaming over his features. 'And you're beautiful,' Roger's face heats, and he looks away, eyes trained on the ground, 'I can't believe this is happening. And I can't believe it feels so fucking _good_ ,' Ralph laughs above him, and Roger's heart squeezes in on itself - he wanted to hear that sound again. Forget the moans - his laugh was the prettiest thing Roger has ever heard. He looks back up at Ralph, who's smile falters. 'What's that look for?'

'I dunno. I just - I really like you.' Ralph hums happily, kisses his cheekbone.

'I really like you, too.' His hips roll in a stronger, more sure motion, and Roger groans, pulling him closer. His back is hot, his skin covered in a thin layer of sweat from the heat of the fire, and Roger pushes his nose against his jaw.

'Are you comfortable enough like this?'

'Yeah,' Roger moves up into him and grabs his waist, kissing his collarbone.

'Even with the fire?'

'It feels pretty nice, actually,' Ralph's hips roll back and his voice pitches up when he does, 'This all feels pretty fuckin' nice.' He pushes his face into his hair and moans quietly. 'Are you warm enough?'

'I'm getting there.' Ralph manages to find space between them, for he's moving closer, arms around his neck. Roger bites at his neck, and pushes up into him, grabbing at his shoulders. He figures out that there's a certain spot under Ralph's jaw that drives him crazy, makes him dissolve into whimpers, the pace his hips moving at picking up into desperate bucking. He targets that spot, and Ralph grabs at his hands, moaning his name and cursing softly.

'Roger, baby, I - ' His voice hitches into a wordless moan as one of his hands goes to his cock, moving hurriedly. Roger pulls away to watch him, smiling up at his face as he rubs at the wet spot on his neck. A faint bruise has formed there, and he leans back in to rub his nose over the spot.

'Slow down. Take it slow.' He whispers, and Ralph whimpers. His hand drops from his neck to his wrist, and he smiles. Ralph pulls away to lace their fingers together, his palm pressed to the back of his hand.

'Do it for me,'  He murmurs to him, and he smiles, bites at the spot again, relishing in the gasp as he brings their joined hands back to his cock. He's not moving, letting Ralph work his hips above him, the only movement his mouth, on his neck, and his thumb, circling around the head of his cock in even, patient circles. Ralph starts to babble in desperation, begging for a faster pace. His hand on his cock prevented him from moving any faster than a slow, small twitch of his hips.

'Please, baby, need it faster. Need more. Please. Please, please, I need you. I need it all, all of you. All of it.' Roger hums and slowly starts to stroke his cock, moving up into him even slower, and Ralph moans loudly. Roger licks up his jaw, and amid the moans Ralph actually _giggles_ , shoulders lifting and his head tilting against Roger's cheek. He smiles back and runs his tongue over Ralph's ear until he squeals, forgetting their current position for a moment. Then, he bites his ear, and Ralph shudders, sinking back against him.

'You're adorable, y'know that?' Ralph barely shows any signs he hears him, only turning his face into his neck and humming shakily, 'So fucking cute. So fucking pretty.' Ralph's hand splays wide against the back of his neck and he pulls him closer, nose pushed to his ear.

'Why don't you show me how pretty I am with a couple of bruises?' He whispers, and it goes right to his cock, twitching in him. He grabs his hips, hard, and pushes into him, more firmly, stroking his cock faster now. He bites the spot below Ralph's ear, then licks at the sweat, moving down until he finds his pulse, focusing his efforts onto the fluttering beat.

 

He keeps at it until Ralph spills over the back of his hand with a shuddering moan, lurching against him. His neck is covered in marks, and he whimpers when Roger rubs his thumb over one of the darker ones. Roger shifts his hands to his waist, biting his lip as he watches him come down from the high, chest heaving.

'You close?' Ralph whispers when he realizes he's still hard, still in him. His hips roll slowly, evenly, and Roger shuts his eyes, letting the feelings wash over him.

'I will be, if you keep doing that.'

'Guess I will, then.'

  
It doesn't take much longer for him to spill into him, gasping his name as he does. Ralph's hand goes to his cheek, and he smiles, climbing off him and pulling him down to the floor, pulling the blanket over them. Both hands are on his face now, and Roger can't bring himself to look away. Ralph kisses him gently, then settles down and wraps his arms around his neck, pushing his face against his chest.

'That was really good,' He whispers, and Roger nods distantly, still catching his breath. Ralph kisses the sweat away from his collarbone and wraps his hair around his fingers, hand buried in curls. Roger kisses his ear and swallows thickly. 'Thank you.'

'You did most of the work.' Ralph hums, not disagreeing, then laughs softly, nose going to the crook of his neck. A silence slips over them easily, and Roger closes his eyes, playing with the baby hairs at the base of Ralph's neck, feeling him breathe against his side. Ralph kisses his jaw and pulls back to look down at him.

'What are we? After this?' He asks, too loud for the intimacy of the moment. Roger hums, opening his eyes to meet his gaze.

'What do you want us to be?'

'Together,' He doesn't hesitate when he says it, and his fingers tighten in his hair, 'You?'

'Same,' Roger whispers. He expect the kiss, quick and heated, and is able to kiss back, catching the back of Ralph's head. 'Together.'


	50. XLIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is. Comedy. and i didnt try??? at all i wrote this one night when i didn’t sleep
> 
> happy being halfway thru this shit

'Sometimes, it’s like - I never fucking learned how to read. I’m nineteen, for fucks sake. What the fuck is a (insert big word here that I’m too lazy to find)?’ Simon rubs at his forehead, looking the most genuinely stressed he’s ever looked. As if they were in a movie, or because I needed it to happen for story purposes, the bell rings, and Sam and Eric literally sprint into the room, like the throwaway characters who only show up when I need to get characters together they are, and they scream with excitement.

'It's summer!' One of them - honestly they are interchangeable at this point - shouts, while the other adds:

'It's time to fucking party!' 

 

'Anybody ever tell you you look like Beyoncé?' Simon and Ralph are pregaming before Sam and What’s-His-Name Big End of The Year Party. Hard. Ralph looks up from where he sits, genuine tears in his eyes.

’OMG, shut up! I do not!’

'Ohmigod, why can't you just take the freaking compliment!'

'I love you, bitch.'

’Really?’

’Yeah! And I ain’t never stop lovin’ you, bitch!’ They share a platonic hug because Ralmon will never get together in one of my fics that’s longer than 500 words. They pat each other on the head affectionately, then head out to the car. On the way, they talk some Boyish Gossip.

'And they were roommates!'

’Oh my god, they were roommates.’ Simon nods emphaphetically to Ralph’s story. ‘So. These stories that you tell me that the actual writer is too lazy to come up with, are they real?’

’Yeah, sometimes.’ Ralph turns on the radio, where Cheerleader by that artist who I don’t wanna look up is playing. He slaps at the wheel and shouts, because they shout a lot apparently, ‘This song makes me wanna suck a dick.’

They pull up to the party, and Simon looks at Ralph exceptantly. Okay so maybe I lied about the Ralmon thing.

’So...?’

’No!’

’Why?!’

’Because!’

’So no head?’ Ralph shakes his head and looks away. So I lied. Again. Rule number one, trust no one. ‘Get out me car!’

 

When they get in the house, the head thing is forgotten. Almost like it didn’t happen. Huh. Jack is fighting with another kid, as usual.

’What the _fuck_ is up, Robert? No, what did you say, dude? What the fuck, dude? Step the _fuck_ up, Robert!’ Robert, who I’m putting as a random dude because there are like, -0 people in this book and I like mixin shit up okay, punches Jack in the arm, and he frowns Extra Hard.

’The next time you put your hands on me, Ima rip your fuckin’ face off, _bitch_!’

’I hope the fuck you do!’ Robert shoots back, frowning Extra Extra Hard, ‘You’ll be a dead son of a bitch, I’ll tell you that!’ Jack punches Robert square in the fucking face, and the rest of the choir shouts in exasperation:

’Jack! For fuck’s sake!’

’Fuck off, Jack.’ Gradually, they disperse as there’s a crash from the other room. One of the twins shouts over the music.

’This is why Mom doesn’t fucking love you!’

 

Simon and Ralph go and see what went down. In the next room, the pool table is broken in half, a Twin lying on top of it. (This is a John Mulaney reference if u didn’t get it)

The other Twin stands over him and sighs. ‘Ah fuck. I can’t believe you’ve done this.’

’Way to go, Sam.’ Because apparently Simon knows the twins apart. Because these characters care about each other but I could care less about everyone except for like, four of them. So. Carrying on.

 

’Pizza’s here!’ Maurice calls from the hall, already twirling his vape pen like a villain would twirl his moustache in a shitty movie. The Standing Twin, having forgotten about the John Mulaney Reference Pool Table, groans.

’Don’t fucking vape on the pizza, Maurice!’ Maurice fuckin flips the top open and blows a sick vape all over the pizza. Standing Twin fuckin backflips and blows that shit away, and he gasps. ‘Eric!’

’Disgusting,’ He grabs the box from his hands so violently it also flies away.

’Ah! Stop! I coulda dropped the pizza!’

’Fuck you, Maurice, you put your shitty vape all over it. You go... Eat a yogurt or something.’

’But yogurt is just fruit sperm! I’m not gay!’ In anger, Maurice karate kicks a random water bottle to flip perfectly. Used to this shit, Standing Twin rolls his eyes.

’What the fuck, Maurice?’ Maurice storms into the kitchen to angrily eat his fruit sperm.

 

Meanwhile, The Twin Who Broke The Pool Table mixes several of the drinks together in his cup and downs it in one gulp. When Charlie audibly gasps, he turns to him, face dead serious. 'Fuck you.’

'What the hell, Sam?’ He goes for more Misc. Booze, but finds the bottle empty.

‘This bitch empty!’ He throws it at Standing Twin - don’t worry it’s plastic - ‘Yeet!’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if u didnt catch the references most of the dialogue are from vines


	51. XLV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wanted to do something dark but i wasn’t sure but jes made me do it so uh  
> (it seems Soft buts thats just because i cant write anything dark but dw its uhhhh not good and the relationship is Bad)
> 
> warnings for : kidnaping (is that the right word? idfk) violent behaviour, psychological torture, physical torture to some extent, VERY VERY VERY dubious consent and uhhhh dark themes all around stay safe pals  
> also warning for jack bc i uh. would rather he die and not even look at roger thanks  
> (this is jager)

Roger knew it was a bad idea to go out that night. He knew it when he first got to the club. He knew it when he watches his friends dance and have fun from the sidelines, nursing a beer, and he knew it when he realized he forgot his meds at home and subsequently spent the rest of the night on the edge of an anxiety attack.

He knew it when he woke up to the cold and dark, shivering in nothing but a tank top and briefs, shackled to a beam.

 

He groans, shaking his head to clear it of the fogginess, and then harder to try and shake off the blindfold that has been pulled over his eyes. He makes a louder noise, tugging at his arms as panic sets in. Somewhere above him, a door opens and footsteps come down wooden stairs.

'So you're finally awake. Good - I thought I would have to douse you.' The voice is cool, emotionless, and the footsteps stop right in front of him. 'Such a pretty little thing, when I saw you at the bar - I dig the quiet, sensitive ones. They always scream the loudest, when you break 'em.' He's so close that he can feel his breath on his face, smelling of mint. His thumb runs over his bottom lip, and his skin smells clean, like soap. He flinches away from his touch nonetheless, and his captor laughs. Roger wants to ask why, but his tongue feels heavy in his mouth, and his mouth is dry. He swallows and turns his face away from the other, and there's a laugh. 'You don't say much, hm? That's fine. I'll just leave you alone then.' His hand is on his shoulder, then away again. Roger thinks he'll leave him to the silence and the cold, and he wishes he won't. But instead, there's the sound of a button clicking, and the first drumbeats of an 80's pop song fills the room. 'Hope you like Kenny Loggins.'

 

By the eighth replay of Footloose, Roger has decided that the silence was better than this. He screws his eyes shut and wishes that it wasn't so loud so he could sleep and wake up from this nightmare.

He wasn’t even sure if he was alone - he thought his captor had left him, but little things told him he wasn't so sure. Shifting of feet, something brushing the small of his back. Once, something was knocked over, and Roger cried out loudly, cowering against the wood behind him, face tucking to his shoulder.

Ocassionally, cold water drips on his shoulders, making him jump. There's no discernible pattern, and no way to expect them as they land on his skin, on his scalp occasionally.

Although the repeating song has since become his entire world, Roger doesn't notice it's stopped until his captor speaks.

'Are you hungry?' Roger wets his dry lips and nods, only now noticing that he was indeed famished. A plate is set down in front of him, and he can smell the food from where he sits. He whimpers when his stomach growls, and leans forward. 'Use your words, pet. If you’ve got them.' Another whimper, and his captor scoffs. 'Well, I'm going to bed.' The song is back on, and Roger almost screams with frustration when the volume is turned up, something he hadn’t realized was possible. This time, he knows he's alone with Kenny Loggins and the plate of food in front of him, and he allows himself to cry for the first time that day.

 

It must be morning, because there are jovial footsteps down the stairs, and the song is shut off, the first reprieve in however many hours that have since blended together. Something cold presses to his lips, rubbing water over them, and Roger lets the other do this, licks up the water immediately after he pulls away.

'You gonna use your words today, pet? If you ask nice and pretty, I'll give you some of this water. And some of this food. Maybe I'll take off the blindfold, if you beg nice enough,' When there’s no answer, he hums in displeasure, and his voice is further away when he speaks again, 'You're a stubborn one. But you'll break - they always do.'

The song, stopped in the middle of the chorus, starts again, and Roger actually sobs. He can feel the victorious smirk from here, and he can feel when the door clicks shut at the top of the stairs.

 

Days must go by - it seems like it. He's so tired that his body hurts, his eyes sore and screaming under the blindfold. He's stopped noticing the hunger, but the thirst is an incessant clawing at the back of his throat.

The song fades out, and Roger can hear his captor whistling upstairs, and he could cry with relief. He hadn’t heard anything since the morning when he had rubbed the ice cube over his lip and had become convinced that he had been left alone to rot in this basement.

'Please,' He croaks, his voice hoarse from disuse. It’s drowned out as the song starts again, 'Please.' He tries to call louder, but his voice just breaks, and he sobs, pulling at his wrists. They have been rubbed raw, just from him weakly tugging at his chains over these last days. He tugs again, more insistently, tries to call out again. Then again. And again, until the door finally opens. The music pauses, and he sighs in relief.

'Please.' He whispers, and his captor hums.

'He speaks,'

'Please. I... Water? Please?'

'Remember what I said yesterday, pet? Beg nice and pretty.' That catches him off guard. _Yesterday_? It had seemed so much longer. He jerks back, then runs his dry tongue over his drier lips.

'Please, may I have some water? I... I'm so thirsty, Sir.' There’s no response, but a cool glass is pressed to his lips, and a mouthful of water rushes in before it's quickly drawn away. Roger swallows and shudders, nodding gratefully. 'T-thank you.' There's a silence, and he thinks he’s left. Then, a small piece of something is pressed to his mouth. A sandwich. He chews and swallows, and it’s the best damn thing he’s ever eaten. When he thanks him again, he means it this time. His captor hums, then the sound of him going upstairs.

_He left the music off._

 

Roger is woken by ice water dousing his face. He gasps, splutters as he scrambles away as best he can.

'Wake up.' It feels as though he’s only slept an hour at most, but he's stopped trusting his sense of time. He stretches his legs out as best he can against the chains, then his ankle is grabbed, and he’s jerked down the pole as it’s lifted in the air.

'These are going to get infected. Jesus fucking Christ,' Then, the hand on his arm, and his voice is behind him, 'These too. Jesus, and I thought you were being good.' His captor sighs, then the jangling of keys. Then, he's being stood up, legs amazingly weak. He stumbles then sprawls back against the pole, grasping it for balance as he whimpers, swaying on his feet. He reaches up to push his blindfold off and run, run up the stairs and out of wherever he is, but the hand is around his wrists, pulling him along and up the stairs, where he falls three times, bare feet catching on the steps.

 

He is pushed down onto something smooth and cool, then a salve is applied to his wrists and ankles, bandages wrapped over them. It happens so quick that he doesn’t process that he’s walking freely until he’s being shackled back to the post, numb and tired.

'I was going to let you have a full meal today, but since you did this... No food for a while, I think.'

 

In his mind, it’s been at least a week, but it probably wasn't more than a day that he was left alone, the building above him silent.

But he breaks down halfway through, dry sobs wracking his frame. He’s unable to cry, not truly, and the breakdown leaves him exhausted.

He sleeps fitfully the rest of the time, stubbornly ignoring the thirst and hunger, instead focusing on the troubling thought that he hasn’t yet needed to relieve himself.

 

Finally, blissfully, a plate is set down in front of him, then the knot behind his head is loosened.

The light is blinding, and he flinches away, eyes screwing shut as he makes his attempt at a cry. Hands are on his arms, rubbing over the skin. Goosebumps follow his touch, and he draws into himself. He looks up, however, finally looking his captor in the eye.

The first thing he processes are his eyes, like two chips of ice, so light and cold and emotionless. Then the shock of red curls, hanging down in those eyes. Then, the rest of him. His face is long and full of sharp edges and contours, all chin and cheekbones and jawline, unforgiving. His nose is slender but broken in several places, discoloured around the inside of his eyes. Freckles cover his face in the likeness of a Jackson Pollock painting. But under all of his ugliness, there’s something handsome about him - no, that’s not the right word. Magnetic. Enchanting. But not handsome.

'Eat pet,' He murmurs, and Roger realizes he’s been holding up a sandwich for him. He takes a bite, dropping his gaze, and the man’s thumb rubs over his undereye. No doubtedly, he looks terrible. He feels terrible.

'Water, please.' A glass is put to his lips, and he can't swallow fast enough, coughing when he chokes, then retching when it settles that he drunk too much too fast. Bile rises in his throat, and he coughs, choking it back down.

But by the time he’s finished the sandwich, he vomits anyways, down the front of his shirt with a shuddering sob. His captor looks down at him in surprise, but doesn't move. After a moment, he stands and then unlocks his chains.

'Arms up,' He orders, and then pulls his undershirt off, turning around and crossing to where a washer and dryer sit in the corner of the room. Roger realizes that he’s left both chains unlocked, and looks up at the stairs. He could make that.

He scrambles to his feet and shoots up the stairs, but the other man must have expected him to do it. He follows, and when Roger’s hand is wrapped around the side of the door, he grabs it and slams it shut on his fingers. Roger screams and buckles in, his fingers still in the doorway. For good measure, he does it again, harder, and Roger can hear the crack this time, his screaming changing pitch and going hoarse as he cradles his hand to his chest. The fingers are blackening already, sticking out in directions they definitely aren’t meant to be in. He’s grabbed by the hair and hauled back down the stairs and thrown back against the pole. Reduced to a sobbing mess, he refuses to let his captor pry the hand back behind him back.

'Why?’ He chants it again and again, screaming it through the pain, and the other sighs.

'Shut the fuck up.' The glee in his voice is palpable, and Roger distantly realizes this is what he wanted; to break him, make him scream and cry.

'Why are you doing this?' He whispers, quieting into hiccuping sobs when he gives up on cuffing both hands. It wasn't like he could use the hand anyways.

'Because you're beautiful.' It’s a simple answer, and one Roger wasn’t expecting. His hand lowers into his lap, and the other stands, then walks to the stairs. He stops at the foot, and looks back. 'I'll fix that when I feel like it. I'll come back when I feel like it. But I think you should think about what you just did. Long and hard.'

 

Even without the blindfold, he isn't sure how much time has passed. Once, the redhead had come down with a load of laundry, but hadn't looked at him, and he looked down at his purple, swollen hand. Enough time had passed that the pain had faded to an aching throb.

He's glad of the pain now, something to focus on to distract him from the silence and claw of hunger and thirst. A few times, he tries flexing his fingers, and the pain is renewed, and he lurches forward, gritting his teeth against a guttural cry. The door at the top of the stairs open, and he could cry with relief - although his captor could bring more pain, it was more likely he brought food and a way to stop the pain. He seemed kind, in a way. Understanding.  
But no one comes down the stairs. The door closes again, and there's a laugh behind it, a different voice.

'You seriously don't have beer down there, Merridew?'

'I gotta go grocery shopping, man, sorry.' His captor, but there's emotion in his tone now, a strange and jarring realization when there's another laugh. Roger clears his throat and calls out weakly, and the laughter stops.

'Is that the dog?'

'Shit, yeah. I know you don't - I'll go give him a treat or something, shut him up.'

'Alright, man. Look for the beer while you're down there, yeah?' Footsteps above him, then the sound of the television turning on. The door opens, and he finally comes down, finally looks at him.

'Shut the fuck up,' He grits out, and Roger flinches away, looking above him. The other turns and starts up the stairs, and Roger swallows thickly. He screams, as loud as he can manage, and then the man is in front of him, hand clapped over his mouth. He grabs his face and slams the back of his head against the post so hard that stars burst behind his eyelids, and he sinks back, dazed and gasping. 'Shut. The fuck. Up.' Something is stuffed into his mouth, then a strip of cloth is wound around his head. His hand has dropped to the floor beside him, and his captor steps on his fingers, and he cries out against the gag, tears streaming down his face. His eyes are cold and malicious, and he crosses the room, picking up a case of beer with a clatter.

'Guess what I found!' He calls up, bright and grinning again, and climbs up the stairs, 'They're warm, but I could stick 'em in the fridge.' The door shuts, and then there's the click of a lock, and Roger's heart sinks, tears dripping down his face in pained silence.

 

Later that night, the television shuts off, and there's the sound of a tap running, plates moving around in a sink - washing up. They had gotten loud over the last few hours, and the sound of a football game could be heard under their shouts and cries of victory. Now, there's a soft murmur of voices, and quiet laughter.

'You could stay, if you'd like.' The voice he knows, his captor.

'Nah. Your dog is probably desperate for a walk by now.'

'Yeah, I guess.' Footsteps above him, then the unlatch of a lock - different than the one on the door at the top of the stairs - and a heavier door opening. 'Text me as soon as you get home?'

'Always.' The door closes, and the house above him settles into silence. Then, the lock on the door at the top of the stairs unlatches and the man tramps down the stairs, a plate in one hand and a paper bag in the other. He sits down in front of him and grabs his wrist. When he winces, his fingers go slack around his wrist and he looks up at him, something resembling guilt in the set of his mouth.

'I didn't mean this - but I wanted to break you, you know? I didn't realize the break would be this bad. I should probably...' He trails off, then empties the paper bag onto the floor. He works quietly, first winding gauze around his four fingers, then tape, keeping his wrist securely in his lap. He blows his hair from his eyes, and Roger wants to brush it from his face, wishes he could be unchained and do just that. Finally, the man looks up, then pulls the gag from his mouth to hang around his neck.

'Who was that?' He whispers.

'Someone from work. Eat.' A sausage roll is held up in front of him, but he doesn't move.

'I heard a name. Merridew. Is that...?'

'No.'

'What is your name, then?' The sausage roll is pushed up against his bottom lip, and he obediently takes a bite.

'Jack.' He says after a long pause, tone uncertain.

'Oh. I'm - '

'I know your name.' Jack says quickly, and Roger nods, quickly eating the rest of the roll and looking down, swallowing thickly.

'Can I ask you something?'

'No.' Jack picks up another sausage roll, holds it up.

'Why me? I'm not - I'm not beautiful.' In fact, he could feel how much weight he's lost, see his ribs through his shirt - once tight and now alarmingly loose - and his collarbones stick out broadly. Jack stares at him for a long time, then frowns.

'No. You are, just not like...' He stops, then sets the sausage roll down. 'When I saw you at the bar, I saw you with your friends. And you weren't my first choice; I saw that blond you were with. He was my first choice. But after watching him for a while, I realized that he wasn't beautiful, either. He knew he was attractive, he reveled in it. He was vain, and... And ugly, because of that. But you - you weren't aware of yourself. Of how pretty you looked. And I knew that I wanted you.'

'Why did you do... This?'

'Because I need you to realize your beauty,' There's an urgency in his tone now, 'And you still don't realize it. If - if I keep you here, I can... I can show you. I can love you until you love yourself.'

'You don't love me,'

'Not yet.' Jack moves closer, fingers gentle under his eye. He smiles, and it's the first genuine smile he's seen from him. 'But I will.'

 

He doesn't remember falling asleep, but he's woken up by the cuffs on his wrists coming off. He blinks and looks up at Jack in the dark, the basement light not on anymore. His ankles are already bare, and he stretches his legs out, closing his eyes again.

'I've been thinking. And this ends today. Stand up.' His voice is soft, but there's something in it that scares Roger more than anything else. He does as he's told, climbing the stairs on unsteady legs and looking at the door. Near the bottom of the door, there are scratch marks, deeper than a dog or cat could make. He glances back at Jack, who nods and opens the door for him.

'Jack, wh-'

'Shh.' He's guided into a room just across a small hallway, and when Jack turns on the light, it's revealed to be a bathroom. Roger avoids the mirror to watch Jack, room suddenly spinning. Roger says his name, softly, and he looks over his shoulder at him.

'Do you think you can handle a shower?' Roger nods, weakly, and Jack frowns, but steps back and helps him climb in. 'Sit down, at least. I don't want you falling and hurting yourself.' Roger lowers himself carefully and holds his bandaged hand out of the spray, looking up at Jack when he picks up a bar of soap, taking hold of an arm and rubbing it over his skin carefully. His other hand rests on the back of his head, and he leans back into his touch, closing his eyes and letting out a shuddering breath. He lets the smell of soap and Jack's skin, clean with just a hint of the sourness of sweat. When he leans close to wash his chest, he can smell the mint on his breath.

'Thank you,' He whispers when Jack leans into the spray to wash his other arm. Jack looks at him briefly, water dripping off the curls in his eyes, then he smiles.

'Can I wash your legs? Or will you.'

'You can, if you want.' He whispers, and Jack turns away to do just that. He watches his jumper grow dark from the spray of water, and there's a sudden need to pull it off him completely. He bites his lip and grabs the hem carefully. Jack looks back at him, and he tugs it up. Seeming to understand, Jack straightens up out of the spray and pulls his jumper off, then pushing his trousers down. In just his boxers, he climbs into the shower behind him, pressing up close to him and bending over him to wash his legs.

It wasn't what Roger had in mind, but he can't focus on anything but Jack's heartbeat against the back of his head. He leans back into his stomach, tilting his face so his nose rests on his sternum. One hand goes to his shoulder, and he smiles, swallowing thickly.

When both legs are washed, Jack pulls back, and then pauses.

'Lean forward. I need to get your back.' Roger follows his directions, chest tight and heart hammering. His fingers trace up his back, and he can't imagine what it looks like - spine sticking out, shoulder blades protruding in horrible ways.

'Will you wash everything?' He croaks, and Jack stops.

'Do you want me to?' Silence fills the space between them, then he nods.

'Yes,'

 

He can't remember the last time anyone has touched him like this.

Jack has backed them up to the end of the bathtub, and his face is pressed into his neck, bar of soap lying forgotten at their feet. His hand is wrapped around Roger's cock, stroking slowly, and he presses kisses to his wet skin. Roger whimpers, grabbing for his other hand, unable to look away from the sight before him. Jack's thumb rubs over the head of his cock briefly, before his whole hand runs back down his length, and then he sets up an even rhythm that drives Roger crazy. The heels of his feet push at the tile, struggling for purchase, and he gasps Jack's name, moaning loudly when he bites his shoulder. He falls back against his chest and lets it all wash over him, moans quieting into whimpers when Jack’s other hand rubs over his thighs.

'I want you to come for me, beautiful,' Jack whispers, lifting his face from his neck to rest his cheek on his shoulder, 'Show me how pretty that cock looks leaking cum.' There’s something in his voice that pulls him right over the edge, and he moans his name, buckling over his arm and spilling over the back of his hand. He sobs, dry and spent, falling back against Jack's chest limply. Jack wraps his arms around him and holds him close, kissing everywhere he can reach without moving much.

'Fuck,' Roger whispers, broken and shaking, and Jack hums, rinsing his hand off in the spray as he kisses his cheek.

'You did so well, baby. So good.'

'Can we get out of the shower now? I'm cold.' His voice sounds like a child's, but he can't care at the moment. Jack nods, kissing his cheek.

'Of course, baby. Let me just - ' He eases up and turns off the shower, then climbs out of the tub. He throws their clothes into a laundry basket by the sink, then unfolds a towel, leaning over Roger to wrap it around him. 'I'd carry you, but you’re too big,' He murmurs, and Roger gets up on shaking legs, pressing into him.

He expects to be taken back down into the basement, but Jack instead turns down the hall and opens another door, urging him in.

'Do you want anything to wear?' He shakes his head, staring at the bed as a fresh wave of exhaustion rolls over him.

'Just want you.' He whispers, pulling Jack with him when he drops the towel, climbing into the warm, soft bed. Jack wraps his arms around him and pulls him to his chest in a gesture that makes Roger feel more protected and loved than he ever has.

'Goodnight, beautiful.' He whispers, and Roger grabs for his hips, repeating it quietly.

 

When he wakes up, there's a moment of confusion when he's met by comfort and warmth, so used to the uncomfortable coldness of the basement. His heart seizes in his chest, and he's convinced for a moment that he's lost Jack somehow. Then, there's a shift behind him, a nose pushing into his hair, and he remembers, relief flooding through his chest and opening his person up. He rolls over and reaches for Jack, legs tangling with his.

'You're awake,' Jack whispers, fingers working over his stomach, and Roger smiles, wrapping his arms around him. He pushes his face into his neck and hums when he grabs at his hips.

'How long have you been up?'

'A while. I was afraid you would run and I would have to break a kneecap.'

'I wouldn't run.'

'I know that now.' Jack rolls them over, and kisses across his chest. Roger tucks his face into his neck and closes his eyes. His fingers track over the curve of his ear, and Roger shivers, murmurs his name quietly. 'How's your hand?'

'Hurts.' Jack picks up his wrist and kisses his knuckles, just above the bandage.

'It'll get better.' He murmurs dismissively, pulling Roger closer. Then, he brushes his hand through his hair and kisses his cheek, pulling back to look down at him. 'God, you're adorable.' Roger looks away, resting his hand on his chest and biting his lip. Jack traces his nail down his sternum, lingering just above his naval, then moving to his side, running back up over his ribs.

'Don't go anywhere. I'm gonna get us some breakfast.'

 

When he comes back in the room with a plate of fruit and a slice of toast, Roger has stood, looking around the room. He sets the plate down on the bed, following him and touching the small of his back.

'Come back to bed, beautiful.' He whispers, kissing his shoulder, 'I wanna be close to you - I've spent so long, knowing that you were so close to me, but not quite mine yet.  Come back to bed. Be mine.' His arm wraps around his middle easily, and he mouths at his shoulder blade. Roger nods, mumbling something about being cold.

A few moments later, Roger climbs back into bed, bundled into a jumper and briefs. Once, he probably wouldn't have fit into Jack's clothes, he's so lanky, but he's lost so much weight that they hang off him. Jack bends over him, hand on his cheek as he kisses him gently.

'Eat,' He murmurs, putting the plate in his lap and taking a bite of the toast. Roger looks up at him, biting his lip. Jack kisses his forehead and climbs over him to settle next to him in bed, kissing his shoulder through his jumper. 'You need to eat something, love.'

'I'm not hungry. I just... Wanna sit here with you a bit.' Jack takes his hand, moving the plate off his lap. Then, he pulls Roger close, rubbing his arm and kissing his temple.

'Alright. I want to, too. Never wanna be away from you.'

'Me neither,' Roger confesses, sensing that Jack was his livelihood from here on out - and sensing that he didn't want that to change. 'I wanna be yours.' Jack smiles against his temple.

'Then you're mine, beautiful.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> to get in the mindset i played footloose on repeat when i wrote this and uhhh it worked i've officially ruined a banger thanks


	52. XLVI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an anon on my tumblr wanted some jalph hate fuck in a high school au n they complimented me soooooooooooooooooo ya  
> (also someone who was hella rude wanted jack n ralph to b teammates and fuck on the field?? no but u get locker room sex. thanks for being a dick!)

Jack wanted nothing more than to teach Ralph Gornick a lesson - wipe that cocky smirk off his face. Or, even better, grind it into the dirt.

He hated the blond with every fibre of his being - it literally made his chest ache in anger when he even thinks of him.

Jack watches from the bench, stewing in anger and gingerly rolling his tender ankle as he watches Ralph run down the length of the field with ease, scoring a try and throwing his arms up in victory, hair glowing golden in the sun. The crowd roars around him, and he crosses his arms, shutting out the upcry and kicking at the dirt.

 

In the locker room, the team gives Ralph appreciative pats on his back as he unlaces his gear. Jack has long gotten his off, but he lingers at his locker, pretending to take a deep drink. The room empties out, and Ralph looks up.

'Sorry you took that dive, man.' He offers an easy smile, and Jack grunts.

'No problem.' He hums, pulling off his shirt without another word and collecting his towel under an arm as he walks into the showers.

His face is turned into the spray, but the slap of feet on the tile let him know that Ralph has joined him.

'Are you actually mad at me right now?' Jack snorts and turns to look at him, two showerheads away.

'No,'

'You are! Fuck, are you really this competitive? It wasn't my fault, Jack.'

'I know that.' Ralph's shower starts, and he frowns.

'And yet you're still pouting.'

'Fuck off.' Silence settles under the water hitting the tiles, and Jack pushes his hands through his hair, closing his eyes.

'How’s your ankle?' Ralph's voice is softer, gentler.

'Fine.'

'I really am sorry.'

'Yeah.'

'Don't be an asshole! I apologized, can't you drop it?' Jack doesn't answer, and Ralph moves closer, right into his spray. Jack steps back, eyes widening.

'What the fuck? Dude, I'm - ' It was easier to keep his eyes on his face when he was a good distance away.

'What's your issue with me? I've never done anything to you, and you're always a dick. I try and be friends, and you ignore me, or flat out yell at me. I don't understand you! Is it jealousy? Or - or what?' Jack steps back further, but Ralph steps forward. He grabs his wrist, and Jack's eyes drop to their hands, tries not to stray just a little to the -

When he looks back up at Ralph, the blond surges up so quickly that the back of his head hits the tile behind him, their lips pressing together. Jack curses and shoves him away.

'The fuck, Gornick?'

'You want it, don't you? Want me?' Jack's face is on fire, and Ralph bites his lip, stepping closer.

'Fuck you.'

'Fuck me.' Ralph grabs his other arm, pulling him down this time. Jack blinks in surprise, then gives in and accepts it, stumbles forward and wraps his arms around him, pulling him close and pushing him up against the wall.

He would just have to teach him a different kind of lesson, he supposed.

 

Ralph gasps when he knocks him against the wall, fingers immediately flying up to dig into the grooves between the tiles. Jack leans over him, bites his shoulder.

'Y'know what my problem is? How fucking pretty you are. You're walkin' around after every practice in nothing but a towel, just begging for me to bend you over and fuck you like you deserve.' Ralph moans, the sound somehow made even more obscene by the way it bounces off the large, empty space.

'I was. I was. Fuck - ' He stifles another moan when Jack's fingers rub over his entrance.

'Mhm. You're quite a little slut huh? How many members of the team have you done this with?' Ralph whimpers, hips pushing out against his hand. 'How many have you begged to fuck you?'

'None. None. Just you, I just wanted you.'

'How long?'

'A while,' Ralph chokes it out as his finger slides into him, 'I fig - _fuck_ \- figured that you would eventually come to me. I knew you were into me.' The last word draws into a high, whining cry when Jack crooks his finger against his prostate.

'Fucking brat. You've just come to expect that you'll get your way, huh? Spoiled little slut.' Ralph utters a choked little cry into the tile, nails scrabbling for purchase. One hand slaps back over Jack's hip, nails pressing into his skin.

'Please, Jack,' He whispers, looking back at him with round eyes, 'Please, I need more - '

'Shut the fuck up,' Ralph whimpers when he grabs at his neck, pushing his cheek to the tile, 'Shut up - take what I decide to give you. I shouldn't even be doing this right now - just another person giving you want you want. So you don't whine. And you don't ask for more. Got it?' Ralph nods and looks up at him, silently begging. Jack kisses him forcefully, hand curling around to press into his throat.

'God, you're so fucking hot. Even your eyes make me hard.' He groans, then bites at his earlobe, tugging insistently. Ralph curses and grinds back against his hand as best he can. Jack curses and presses another finger into him, now grabbing at his hip with his other hand, pushing his face into the crook of his neck and sucking a hickey into his skin. Ralph's head falls to the side with another incoherent mumble, and his hand presses over the one at his hip. Jack hurriedly pushes his fingers into him, curling them in him. He eases a third finger in, and Ralph lets out a sharp breath, and Jack immediately pauses.

'Alright, Gornick?' He murmurs against his neck, 'Too much?'

'No,' Ralph says quickly, 'Keep going. Please.' Jack nods and eases his fingers deeper into him.

'Wanna fuck you. You ready?' Ralph whimpers and nods, hips pushing against the palm of his hand. Jack eases his fingers from him and bites his shoulder. He looks down at him, pumping his hand over his cock quickly. Ralph twists and watches him through lowered lashes, flushed and breathing heavily. Jack curses under his breath and pushes two of his fingers into his mouth, grinning when he sucks on them immediately, closing his eyes fully and hollowing out his cheeks. Jack bites back a moan and manages to grin, pumping his hand faster. 'Maybe I should fuck this mouth, though. Cum on your face - you'd look good like that.' Ralph opens his eyes, and Jack can tell he wants to object, but he instead takes his fingers in deeper, holding his gaze evenly. Then, he pulls back, lips resting against his fingertips.

'Whatever you decide.' He whispers softly, and Jack groans, grabbing his face and pulling him into a hard kiss.

'God, you're such a fucking try hard slut, huh? You want my cock, don't you, wanna be filled and fucked like the little whore you are?' Ralph whimpers when his fingers press into his jaw.

'Yes,' His eyes are round and pleading now, and Jack knows he likes this, wants this.

'Then say it.'

'I want you to fuck me,' Jack hums, biting his jaw, 'Please.' He finishes in a squeak, and Jack's hand drops to his hip.

'Since you asked so nicely.' Jack lines himself up with his entrance and pushes in without another word. Ralph moans, and it's another full moan this time, bouncing off the tiles. Jack buries his face in his shoulder, the water from the shower getting in his eyes.

'Fuck,' He groans, both hands on his waist now, gripping hard and bordering on possessive. Ralph turns his face against his, and whimpers as he starts moving in him, quick even strokes of his hips. One of his hands curls around the front of him to grasp his cock, moving his hand in a slow, torturous pace, his nails digging into his hips. Ralph whispers his name, the sound somehow amplified and too quiet to register simultaneously. He hums in reply, biting at his neck, making sure to leave another hickey over his pulse.

'Fuck, Jack, I - '

'Are you alright?'

'Yeah,' He whimpers, and Jack nods, kissing his jaw, 'Want it harder. Please.'

'Remember what I said? Take what you get, pretty boy.' Ralph huffs, and Jack kisses his earlobe before leaning back to look over him. Ralph turns his head, pushing his cheek to the tile. Their eyes hold for a moment, then Ralph cranes his neck to watch him fuck him, his cheeks immediately darkening more than the pleasant flush that already colored his cheeks and upper chest.

'God, you're so fucking hot.' He whispers, pressing his hand to the space between his shoulder blades, the hand on his cock going slightly faster. Ralph whines, looking back down at his own cock. 'So fucking hot. And desperate. Wow - holy _fuck_.' He groans when Ralph moves back against him, hand now moving fast - eager to get him to come, eager for that inevitable clench around himself that would more than likely pull him over the edge himself. Ralph moans again, louder this time, and straightens up, throwing his head back. The back of his skull hits Jack's shoulder, and he winces, free hand pressing across his collarbone.

'Fuck, Jack,' He whispers, gasping for breath. Jack bites his earlobe, 'I'm close. I'm close.'

'Come for me,' Jack growls, nails pressing into his skin. He bites at his neck, his shoulder, 'Come on, slut, show me what you have for me.' Ralph comes against the tile with a cry, legs buckling under himself. Just as he predicted, he clenches around his cock, and Jack moans, shifting him forward so he can fuck into this new tightness, quickly spilling into him with barely a gasp. He pauses for a moment to catch his breath, forehead resting on his shoulder, then he eases out and shuts the shower off, quickly gathering his composure.

'Still don't like you,' He says quietly, and Ralph turns his head to the side, gasping and pink-faced, 'But I do like this new development. See you next practice, Gornick.'


	53. XLVII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> an anonymous asker wanted me to do a lil hogwarts au... almost 6k is small, right?
> 
> set during chamber of secrets... concept came from jes so uhhh she deserves all the luv thnx
> 
> i tried to like,,, intersperse the present with like flashbacks and idk if i like it or not but wowzer
> 
> (i havent read the books in a million or seen the movies for even longer so. i def got some stuff wrong but w/e rowling is cancelled anyways it dont matter)

'Abbott. Can I tell you a secret?' It's whispered into the curve of Ralph's neck, and he jumps. He hadn't even realized that Jack was still awake.

'Anything,' He says back, moving back the curtain around his bed to glance out the window. It was still dark, but Ralph figured that, since he was awake, Jack would leave the warmth of the Hufflepuff dorms for the coldness of his own dorms.

'You can't tell anyone. Not even Roger knows.' That being Roger Flint, the closest thing Jack has to an actual relationship. Officially, he's seeing some Slytherin girl to hide the fact that he was gay, but pretty much everyone in their year knew he liked boys.

'I promise.' Ralph turns in his arms, even though he can't see him in the darkness. Jack is silent for a moment, then mutters a stronger silencing spell than the one they already cast around his bed.

'I'm adopted.' He says finally, and Ralph stares into the darkness for a long time. Then, he reaches for his wand under his pillow.

' _Lumos_ ,' He whispers, and Jack blinks in the sudden light. 'You're what?'

'My parents told me over the summer. I just. I had to say it out loud. Fucking hell - I'm not an Avery. I'm a muh...' He stops, and looks away. Ralph touches his cheek.

'You don't have to say it,' He says softly, but Jack shakes his head.

'I'm a Mudblood, Ralph. A bloody Mudblood.' Ralph frowns, and lowers his still-lit wand.

'Maybe we should start saying something nicer. You're not a Mudblood, you're Muggle-born. Okay? We'll start there.' Jack sets his jaw, won't meet his eye. Ralph smooths his fingers over his forehead. 'I'm glad you trust me enough to tell me this.'

'It's just. Fuck, my whole life is a goddamn lie, you know? I can't believe my parents never told me before now. I wouldn't have given your Ravenclaw friend so much shit for not being pure-blooded.' Ralph laughs softly.

'If Charles knew, he'd have a field day with this.' He pulls Jack close, and kisses the top of his head. 'I won't treat you any differently, you know. You're still a prick, pure-blood or not.'

'Good to know you're still hopelessly in love with me, then.' Jack murmurs, and Ralph giggles, shoves at his shoulder.

Jack stays with him all night.

 

-

 

'How could this have happened?' Ralph overhears Madam Pomfrey's whisper across the Hospital Wing, 'The message said...' Whoever she's speaking to shushes her, but Ralph ignores both of them.

 

Ralph found out when he got to Potions late, the room already rife with whispers of two other students found. He sat in his usual spot, and listened.

 _'Slytherin couple. Our year. That's all I know,'_ Said one student, and Ralph habitually looked for Jack, expecting him to be deep in conversation with the other Slytherins about the couple. But his seat sat empty, and his friends all cast disturbed glances at it, strangely sad. Ralph's stomach squeezed, and the sting of bile rose in his throat. Ralph tried not to react, his cheeks sucked in and fingers pressed against the edge of the desk. Someone asked if he's alright, and he nodded tightly, thoughts on the Hospital Wing.

  
He sits by Jack's bed now, holding back tears. Jack looks ahead and down, his face a frozen look of confused, distant horror. His hands are raised in a way that, if Ralph were to climb on top of him, his hands would be set on his waist. The girl he was found with was dead, not petrified, her face twisted in pain. Ralph looks over his shoulder to see Madam Pomfrey folding her uniform, lifting a shiny locket and putting it into a bag with her wand and other personal items found on her person. He looks away quickly, the first tear falling. He wipes at his cheek quickly, brushing Jack's hair from his face. He wants to kiss him, hold his hand, something, but he can't quite bring himself to do that, not in public.

He sets his hand on his knee instead, squeezing as tightly as he dares. He seemed so fragile like this, like he could be made of clay, broken easily. Ralph gives in just for a moment and smooths his fingers over his cheekbone, tracing the boldest line of his freckles with his nail. _Never should've let him leave that morning._

'Abbott.' He jumps and springs away guiltily, looking up. Roger Flint stands at the foot of the bed, fidgeting with his hands.

'Alright, Flint?' He greets awkwardly, and Roger nods once, looking between him and Jack. Ralph pulls his hand from his knee.

'Salazar Slytherin,' Is all he says, and Ralph looks back at him.

'What?'

'The Chamber of Secrets. Salazar Slytherin had some disagreement with the other founders about Blood Purity and no Mudbloods at the school - totally on his side, by the way - so he left the school. But before he did, he had this secret chamber in it, and apparently some giant monster spider is down there.'

'How do you know this?'

'My father. His brother attended the school when it was first opened fifty years ago. Y'know the gamekeeper? I dunno his name, but he's big and hairy and - '

'I know him.'

'Well, this Fifth-year found out he was hiding the spider, so he was expelled, and I guess the spider is back or whatever, because - ' He gestures down at Jack, and Ralph blinks up at him in disbelief.

'How are you so calm?' Ralph hisses out, looking back at Jack. He could barely stand to look at him, but he didn't want to look away, either.

'Because he would want me to be.'

'What do you want me to do about all that shit, anyways?'

'I vote that we find this Chamber.' Ralph gives him an incredulous look.

'What the hell are we, two sixth years, supposed to do to a giant spider?'

'You want to help Avery, don't you?'

'Yes, but. Madam Sprout said that Mandrake roots is the cure for this. The best thing to do is just - '

'Do nothing?' Ralph opens his mouth to answer, but Roger pushes on. 'And you know what? You do that. When Avery gets out of it, he'll probably be happier with you anyways - he's always liked you more.' With that, Roger turns and leaves, walking briskly with his head down.

 

-

When the Common Room is empty, Ralph learns quickly to take advantage of it.

In the days following the night when Jack told him what he found out over the summer, they spend more and more time together.

When they're supposed to be in Charms together, they cut class and go down to Ralph's Common Room to take advantage of the empty space. Jack crowds against the arm of one of the overstuffed leather couches in front of the pleasantly crackling fire. Ralph wanders around the room, running his fingertips over the bindings of books in the overflowing bookcases. When he passes one of the pots hanging from the ceiling, he plucks a bright red flower, and glances over at Jack, who's following his every move intently.

'For you,' He murmurs, extending his hand, flower held between his index and thumb.

'A flower?' Jack says incredulously, but still smiles as he takes it in his hand and sniffs it. 'What I really want is for you to stop stalling, and come over here.'

'Mhm. Patience, mister.' He pulls his robe off and slings it over the back of a chair, then rolls up the sleeves of his shirt and jumper. Jack huffs, but doesn't look away.

'Take more off, and I will be patient.' He grins, and Ralph crosses back across the room to tuck the flower behind his ear for him. Jack smiles up at him, then closes his eyes as Ralph cards one hand through his hair, fingertips playing over the shell of his ear. Then, he rests his hand on his cheek, smiling when Jack leans his face against his palm.

'Hm. You're cute,' He whispers fondly, thumb rubbing over his cheekbone. He climbs over the back of the couch and settles himself in Jack's lap.

'And you're wasting our precious alone time.'

'No one will come in for at least an hour. We're fine.' He says with a roll of his eyes, and then he kisses him softly, cupping the back of his head. Jack opens his eyes, and seems to search his features for something. Ralph is unsure if he finds it or not, but he allows him to move closer and lean up to kiss his neck.

'I wish things were different,' He murmurs into the crook of his neck, hand rubbing over his waist. 'If I could afford to, I'd leave everything else behind and let everyone see that you’re mine.' Jack's fingers run over a yellowing hickey on his collarbone, and Ralph is unsure of who gave it to him. But whoever did quickly doesn’t matter, because Jack is sucking over it, harder than he usually does, tongue laving over his skin a few times. Ralph moans aloud, cheeks burning as he looks up into the eyes of his house’s finder.

'Shouldn’t we go somewhere else - ?'

'No one will be back, remember?'

'But the paintings - ' Jack pulls back to glance over at Helga Hufflepuff's round face, then back at Ralph. By the stinging on his neck, Ralph knew the hickey was dark.

'Well, let's give them a show, shall we?' Jack pulls his belt open, then Ralph's, before stopping and looking up at him for permission. When he takes a shaky breath and nod, he grins and works Ralph's slacks down his hips.

 

And in the afterglow of it al, he finds himself hoping that someone really does come in, sees them like this - see how close they are, see how Jack is looking at him like he’s his entire world.

See this thing they have, so close to Ralph's idea of love.

 

-

 

'It's Potter.' Ralph slides his reading glasses off and blinks up at Roger patiently. He seems renewed, as though he's forgotten their conversation.

'I know that having a celebrity attend our school is very exciting, but - '

'That's not what I mean - the Dueling Club had a duel today - '

'Yeah, that's sort of the point of a - '

'But Potter - he fucking - spoke to a snake. He's the fucking heir of Slytherin.'

'What are you on about?'

'Enemies of the heir. That Creevey kid was the first student, he was following Potter around, remember? And he was there with that cat before anyone else. And - he's friends with the gamekeeper that opened the Chambers the last time.'

'I'm 100% sure he's not the heir. And, why would he get Jack? They've never spoken.'

'Easy mistake. Surely you know about that whole thing with Lucius Malfoy's son.'

'Flint, really, you sound mad.' Ralph turns back to his book, blinking down at the diagrams of plants. 'If you're not going to be quiet, would you leave? I'm trying to revise for my Herbology N.E.W.T next year.'

'Don't you understand? This is a lead.' Roger sits down across from him. 'We really have a chance of finding this thing.' Ralph sighs, closes his book and folds his hands on top of it's hard cover.

'Okay.'

'Okay?'

'Where do we start?'

 

-

 

 

'Abbott,' Gentle fingers prod Ralph awake, and he blinks up into the dark. 'I have to go.'

'Alright,' He murmurs, and rolls off Jack. He still doesn't move, index finger running up and down his spine. After a few moments, Ralph looks over in his direction. 'What's eating you?'

'It's just. I can't stop thinking about my parents.'

'Write them a letter then.'

'Not those parents. With everything with Filch's cat and the whole _enemies of the heir_ thing - '

'Is _Jack Avery_ , the great Slytherin, actually _scared_ right now?'

'No. But your - your Jack, the Mud - Muggle-born is. Slytherin was infamous for being a supremacist. Enemies of the heir obviously means...'

'Maybe it means Gryffindors. I mean, Slytherins and Gyffrindors have had that rivalry for ages.'

'I think it goes deeper than that, Ralph.' Jack says softly, and Ralph sighs, feels for his face in the dark. His fingers brush over his cheek, and he rubs his thumb over his cheekbone.

'You don't need to be worried about this, Jack. Okay?' Jack is silent, and Ralph sighs, feeling for his wand. The space is lit up with a whispered  _Lumos,_ and Jack turns his face away like he used to do when one of Ralph's insults managed to hit him a little too hard.

'Ralph, please. I really should - '

'I'm not stopping you from leaving. But I want you to know that I'll be here for you. You don't have be alone in this.' Jack looks genuinely surprised to hear it, then he blinks slowly, teeth clenched as he looks up.

'Come here.' He says shortly, reaching for Ralph's hips. Ralph smiles and climbs back on top of him. He knew the jig by now - Jack always responded to high emotions with sex - it was easier to express when he was distracted with other things than what he was saying. Jack grabs his wand from him, not looking away as he murmurs the spell to extinguish his wand.

In the darkness, their lips meet, and Jack grabs his waist tightly, face pushed to his neck.

'I think I'm falling in love with you,' He whispers, 'I don't know what I'm gonna do about it.'

 

-

 

Ralph lets Roger take the lead up to the second floor, to the site of the bloody message on the wall. It had been scrubbed away since then, although the stones still bore the burgundy stains. Ralph stops and looks up at the stain and frowns, letting Roger wander down the hall, inspecting the wall, poking at the stones.

'What are you doing?' He asks finally, watching Roger kick at the wall.

'Looking for an access point to the Chamber.'

'You really think it's in the wall? Like a shite mystery novel?' Roger stops at the spoke that the cat was hung from, and reaches up to tug at it, to no avail. 'Merlin's beard, you're an idiot. It's obviously around the message, if it's going to be in the wall.' Roger looks up at the stain, and then shrugs. He crosses over and kicks at the wall under the message, and Ralph hesitates before pushing at the stained stones, feeling more than a little foolish.

They do that in silence for a few moments, then Roger speaks.

'What do you do that gets Avery so enthralled in you? Even when he's with me, you're all he talks about.' Ralph can't help but smile at the thought of that, and Roger looks over at him. 'We're probably gonna be over when he's back to his - moving self. I mean, his beard is dead. He probably won't even care, and just - come out.'

'You do realize how important his reputation is to him, right? For him, it's bad enough that he's - ' Roger stops, looks over at him.

'He's what?'

'It's bad enough he's gay,' Ralph finishes quietly, and pulls away from the wall, wiping his hands on his robes, 'I don't think he'd want the whole school knowing it.'

'They already do! He isn't exactly subtle.'

'It's different when you're out. I wouldn't expect you to underst - ' Roger's glare shuts Ralph up, and he looks away quickly, face hot.

'Do not. Even begin to assume anything about me, Abbott.' He says softly, dangerously, 'Just because your parents are liberal and all 'I'll will support my son no matter what because he's traditionally beautiful and still into girls, so it doesn't matter that he's shagging Jack Avery or his friend or any other Hufflepuff boy willing to stick it in him!' Some of us have to worry about more than if our hair is flat one day. So fuck you for even suggesting that we’re in the same situation. Fuck you for even insinuating I have a choice.' Roger turns on his heel and abruptly pushes into the bathroom across the hall from them, leaving Ralph alone in the empty hall.

 

-

 

'Have you told Flint yet?'

'About what?'

'Your - parentage.'

Ralph and Jack sit outside on the grass, a respectful distance between them and their jotters open in their laps. Jack snorts and takes a sip from his water bottle.

'I don't think I'll ever tell Flint. His family is very old Pure Blood - the pure must remain pure and all that. He'll have an aneurysm knowing that a Mudblood's cock has been in him, and he’s enjoyed it.'

'Without the gory details, Avery, please,' Ralph says, disgusted, and admittedly jealous, at the thought of Jack fucking someone else. Jack must sense his discomfort, because he hums and leans in close enough that their noses touch.

'Does that bother you?' He asks tauntingly, and Ralph jerks back, looking around to make sure no one saw that. Jack laughs loudly, shaking his head as he turns his attention back on his jotter. 'Merlin's beard, you're such a spaz. Sometimes you act as if you’re the closeted one and I'm the out one. You really hate me that much, huh?' Jack lifts his hand, and Ralph knows that in private, he would've smoothed his hair back from his face and kissed the spot between his eyes. Instead, he grabs his shoulder and does this weird shaking action with him before letting go.

'I don't hate you,' He says quietly, face hot. 'I just - I'm keeping your interests in mind.'

'You're what I'm interested in right now. I don't really care who sees us.'

'You will later.'

'I will later,' Jack confirms, moves closer, 'But that's later. Right now I just want to... Kiss a pretty boy.' Ralph laughs nervously, looks up at him.

'Let's just - go somewhere quieter then.' He says softly, letting Jack take his hand.

'It's quiet here,' Ralph stands abruptly and looks back at him, smiling shyly.

'Just - follow me, okay?'

 

A short walk later, they've found a quiet corner, and Jack presses Ralph against the wall, his teeth and tongue on his jaw, his pulse. He pushes his robes out of the way, then works his hands under his shirt, fingers sliding up his ribs. Ralph shudders and pushes his face against his hair.

'Why are you so worried about Flint all of a sudden?' Jack asks softly, thigh pressing against his crotch, 'You've never cared about me and him before,'

'I always have. I just - I just got worse at hiding it.'

'I've told you before that I'd chose you over him any day. You don't need to think about him, okay?'

'I just - '

'I don't need Flint, Ralph. I need you. Okay?' Jack's thigh stops moving, and his palms press flat against his chest.

'Okay,' He says softly, pushing his nose against his ear.

'Good,' Jack kisses his jaw quickly, thumbs pressing against his skin, 'But if it really bothers you that much, I won't see him anymore, yeah?' Ralph smiles then, and nods.

'Yeah.'

 

-

 

'It just - It doesn't make any sense.'

Ralph had been spending more time with Roger Flint than he would've liked, and now he sits across from him in the library, half a dozen books on Hogwart's history spread out between them.

'What doesn't make sense?' He asks, tired, and Roger shakes his head slowly.

'Not one of these books mentions the Chamber of Secrets.'

'Uh, yeah, because it's a _secret chamber_. It's a miracle your dad even knew about it - and that was only because he went to school when it was last opened.' Ralph closes the one closest to him, then rubs at his eyes, suppressing a yawn. 'There's probably a billion other things about this castle that aren't in these books.'

'We haven't tried the Restricted Section yet,' Roger suggests idly. Ever since sixth-year started, everyone in his year was excited to be able to go into the section without permission. They had all been disappointed to find out that there wasn't anything particularly special about it. Ralph shrugs, pushes the books to the side. He doesn't get up with Roger like he had before, watching him cross the library to step over the rope from where he sat.

 

At the end of their night, they aren't any closer to finding any answers, and Ralph is itching to visit Jack again. Checking his watch, he frowns harder when he sees that he's missed visiting hours. Roger is watching him, and opens his mouth to speak, before Ralph interrupts him.

'The Mandrakes the second years grew this year are about half way done to being ready to be stewed, so I don't really think we need to - '

'Well, we obviously know it's Potter.' Roger steps forward. Ralph frowns - he never should've told him about the details he learned from his cousin about the most recently Petrified student. 'So, let's put a stop to this before anything else happens.'

'I don't care about anyone else!' He says that too loudly, and he looks around quickly, lowering his voice, 'I just want Jack to get out of this okay.'

'I know that. But just - Isn't it better for everyone if we focus on stopping - '

'I didn't even want to do this in the first place. If you want to play detective and take down Potter, or find the Chamber of Secrets, or whatever else you want to do, just. Leave me out of it, alright? I'm tired, I'm angry, and I just want to help Professor Sprout with the drought, and I just want to see Jack.'

 

-

 

For the first time in a while, Ralph is the one who sneaks into Jack's Common Room. Although it isn't as comfortable as his own, the bed is much more grand, and the curtains that could be drawn down around them were a heavy, dark green. When Ralph realizes that meant that any light from their wands would have difficultly showing through them, he grins over at Jack. They hadn't had the luxury of fucking in a bed with lights on for a while, and Ralph could tell that Jack was just as eager as he was to get into bed.

Jack unbuttons his shirt for him, kissing his neck and smiling against his skin when he whimpers.

'I'm gonna end it with Flint tomorrow morning. I'm sorry it took so long,' He pulls him onto the bed, then draws the curtains shut around them. He pauses to whisper a silencing spell, then light up their little space with his wand, which he balances on the extruding details on his headboard. Then, he looks up at Ralph, running his hand down his arm. 'I just couldn't find a good time to do it.'

'It's fine, really,' Ralph whispers, pulling his arms from his unbuttoned shirt. Jack leans up to kiss a mole on his chest, just by his armpit. 'I'm just glad that we can finally put it behind us.'

'And you aren't worried about - '

'I'm not worried about your beard, baby.'

'Yeah, but, lately, I dunno, I've just been... Wondering things. And she said that - '

'If you want to experiment, that's fine. I just didn't want Flint around you, because - because he's - because he's Flint. I know she won't be any problem.' Jack grins up at him, then pulls him down into a kiss.

'God, I don't deserve you.' He whispers, smiling wider as Ralph pulls the buttons on his shirt free for him.

'No, you don't,' Ralph murmurs in agreement, 'But I still... I still really like you.' As soon as his shirt is pushed down his arms, Jack rolls over and presses Ralph down against the pillows, hands on his shoulders. He considers him for a moment, then bites at his bottom lip, making him yelp in surprise.

'You know how I feel about you already,' Jack whispers. Ralph doesn't miss the avoidance of the _L_ word, but he doesn't complain. Surely, in a few minutes, it would be said over and over against his hair. Then, Jack's hands are gone, and there's the rustling of clothes whilst he pulls away from him. A moment later, he pulls at the waistband of his pajama pants. Moments after that, after some awkward lifting of hips and shuffling around so their clothes could be pushed to the end of the bed, they're both naked, and Jack is sucking a hickey against the curve of his shoulder.

'Your wand,' He whispers, 'Where's your wand?'

'Pocket. Pants.' Ralph gasps out. He couldn't begin to imagine being anything other than a wizard - magic was just so convenient. Jack is gone, returning a moment later to murmur a lubrication charm. Ralph looks down to watch him pump his hand over his cock, a sight he sees fairly regularly, but never tires of. He hums, spreads his legs, and lifts his hips, his own cock hardening as he watches Jack. Finally, Jack is fully hard, and he climbs over him, lining himself up with him. As he eases into him, he leans in to kiss him, and Ralph moans into his mouth, pushing his hips up.

Jack breaks away and kisses the corner of his mouth briefly, grabbing at his hips to hold him up. He moves in him slowly, fingers smoothing through his hair. He smiles down at him, whispers sweet nothings. Ralph pushes his face against his shoulder and whispers his name.

'I can't wait 'til we're done here. I wanna do this every day. I wanna be with you every day. No - no beard. Just us.' Jack whispers, and Ralph nods quickly.

'Me... me too,  _fuck_ , I love you so much, I love _this_ , but I love you most of all, bloody fuckin' Hell,' Ralph gasps out, grabs for his shoulders, nails pressing into his skin. Jack kisses his forehead.

'And I can't wait until we can take longer to do this, fuck, I have a test tomorrow baby,'

'Wanna stop?'

'Merlin, no, never wanna stop. Just - ' He reaches between them and strokes Ralph's cock, quickly, picking up the pace of the movements of his hips as well. ' - Just gotta speed things up, unfortunately.' Ralph just moans loudly, eyes falling shut. He arches forward into him, whimpering, pathetic and desperate. Jack works his thumb over the head of his cock, and he cries out, hips bucking up into his hand. Jack smiles down at him, ridiculously composed for the circumstances, then looks back down between them.

'So pretty,' He coos, saccharine sweet, and Ralph can only whine, 'So hard for me. You're such a sweet little thing, hm? Sweet boy, my sweet boy.' Another few strokes of his cock later, and Ralph is coming, spilling over Jack's fingers and onto his stomach. He gasps out his name as he does, and Jack smiles brighter, kisses him firmly, never stopping his movements. Ralph grabs at his hair now, cradling his head against his chest as Jack pulls him up so they're pressed flush together. There's a faltering of his hips, then he groans, low and guttural, and comes in him. Ralph slumps forward, kisses his shoulder and hums tiredly. Jack pulls out of him, and lowers him back onto the pillows.

'Are you okay?' He asks, smoothing his hair from his face. Ralph nods, blinking up at him slowly.

'I'm great,' He murmurs, and Jack smiles, leaning out of the curtain to pick out his sock from his shoe, using it to wipe up the mess they made of Ralph's stomach and arse. Then, he settles down next to Ralph, draping himself on top of him.

'Sleep well, beautiful,' He whispers.

 

Ralph is woken the next morning by Jack climbing off him and pulling his pajama pants back on. Jack looks back at him and smiles fondly, eyes ringed with dark circles.

'Go back to sleep,' He whispers, brushing his hair from his face, 'We don't have classes for a few hours.'

'My uniform - '

'I'll get someone to bring it to you.' Jack ducks out under the curtains, and before Ralph drops off to sleep, he can hear him address the other Slytherin boys. 'Abbott in in there, and he's naked. Let him sleep in - if I hear about any of you bugging him or saying anything about this, I will personally rip your ballsack off. Got it? Now where the fuck is Flint? I gotta talk to him.' Ralph smiles and rolls over onto his front, pushing his face into the pillow.

 

-

  

Ralph doesn't talk to Roger for months. Which he can't complain about, of course. 

He spends most of his time away from the Hospital Wing, busying himself with schoolwork and hanging out with friends from his own house. He never stops thinking of Jack, though, and never stops checking in on the progress of the Mandrake’s maturation.

'You coming to the Quidditch game tomorrow, Ralph?' Asks Simon Fawley, a boy he has been close with since they were first years.

'Um, who's playing?' He hadn't really been paying attention to this year’s season, not like usual. Although Jack had opted out of playing ever since he broke his arm fourth year, he was still incredibly interested in supporting his teammates, and insisted on dragging Ralph to every Slytherin game.

'We're playing against Gryffindor,' Simon says, like it's obvious. Ralph blinks.

'Oh. Yes, of course. Yeah, I'll - I'll come.'

'I'm glad.' Simon smiles warmly at him, and Ralph tries to replicate it, feeling a more than a little out of place.

 

But the following day, the Quidditch match is cancelled, and Ralph can't say he's not relieved.

That is, until he runs into Roger in the halls, who promptly pulls him to the side.

'It isn't Potter.'

'What?'

'Potter isn't the heir.'

'How do you know?'

'I was going down to the library today, but I wasn't allowed in. Two more girls were attacked, and get this - one of them was the girl I always see hanging around Potter. He wouldn't attack his own friend.' Ralph blinks up at Roger, then looks at the students passing on their way to lunch.

'Okay, so it's not Potter.'

'And I was allowed in the library a little later. There was a book on the table, and a page had been torn out - I think one of the girls were onto something. It was a book of monsters, in the serpent section. We’ve been looking for the wrong thing all along.'

'Wait - we?' Roger purses his lips.

'Are we really having this conversation again? Look - you're obviously interested.'

'Fine. I might be a little - intrigued,' Ralph says shortly. 'So it’s a snake - actually, that makes more sense than a giant spider.'

'At least we know how it’s moving around. The snake must be small, getting around unnoticed and all.'

'Small but deadly,'

'I mean, most of the attacks were pretty secluded. The heir’s been getting ballsy, though. The library? That’s pretty damn public.'

'So what do we do?'

'I don't know. It's a start, right?'

'I guess.'

 

They never get the chance to do any more than that, because _fucking Potter_ turns up after killing the thing himself, and Roger and Ralph stand shoulder to shoulder in the Great Hall, staring at the Gryffindor table.

'Really?  _What the hell are we, two sixth years, supposed to do to a giant spider?_ ' Roger puts on a posh accent when he mocks Ralph, arms crossed over his chest.

'Well, it doesn't matter who did it, as long as we're safe.'

'Yeah, but - '

'Flint, calm down. The restorative drought is almost ready. And then Jack will be okay, and everything else will be back to normal.' Ralph says softly, and looks over at Roger. He can tell, by the look on Roger's face that he isn't all too excited for that day. Ralph squeezes his shoulder gently, and looks back across the tables. 'I know you did this for him. Not just - I know you wanted his approval.'

'What the fuck are you talking about?'

'It's fine, Flint. I get it. You two - you'll work it out, I promise.' Roger turns to look after him, and Ralph can see how insecure he really is in that moment, and there's a surge of pity. He smiles gently at him, then carefully steps around him to join his friends.

 

By the end of May, Jack is cured, and Ralph is able to visit him.

He's called down personally, and when their eyes meet, he smiles broadly. It's all he can do not to run at him, seeing him sitting up against the metal headboard, so pale and tired-looking. Forcing himself to move slowly, he lowers himself down onto the bed, and everyone around them looks away politely.

'Hey stranger,' He says softly, 'I missed you.' Jack smiles, although it's obvious his heart isn't completely in it.

'I was right here.' His voice is hoarse, quiet. Ralph wonders if he knows anything about the girl he was found with yet. Wonders if it's his place to tell him.

'You know what I mean,' Jack reaches up and rests his hand on his cheek, and Ralph is so relieved to feel the give of flesh against his cheekbone.

'I've decided that I don't want to do anymore experimenting with my sexuality,' Jack murmurs, and Ralph closes his eyes and lets out a strange sound, half-sob, half-laugh. Jack pulls him into a hug then, pushes his face into his neck. 'Fuck, I think I'm the one hopelessly in love with you.'

'Jack?' He asks carefully, tenderly. When he hums in answer, Ralph turns his face into his neck, 'I don't want you to end it with Roger.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been doing this for a year. im barely half done. im in hell. i put myself in hell willingly. i hate myself. kill me.


	54. XLVIII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a quick lil thing inspired by the revelation that some boys... look v cute in panties  
> and uh. ralph would be one of those boys

'Have I ever told you I love your ass?'

'Many times,'

'Well, I'm telling you again,' Jack's fingers work over the small of Ralph's back, his voice hoarse in his ear, 'Your ass is phenomenal. Especially in the trousers I bought you.'

'Oh yeah? Well, I'll have you know I'm wearing something else you bought me, too.' Jack groans, low and breathless, his fingers bunching up in Ralph's shirt.

'Which ones?'

'You'll have to find out. Come to mine after work.'

Offically, Jack is just Ralph's coworker, soon to be boss due to the upcoming promotion he was getting, and Ralph wanted an input on his spread sheet. But being bent over his desk like this reminds Ralph of the many, many times he's left his cubicle to go to Jack's private office and draw the shades down, drop to his knees or casually push the files and pencil holder from his desk and lean over it, and he knows Jack knows this.

'How about you go take a coffee break and come to my office instead? I might even have the plug here, still.'

'I think I'll make you wait.' Jack risks planting a kiss on the back of his neck, biting at his jaw before pulling away.

'Tease.'

 

As soon as Ralph gets off work, Jack is there, twirling his keys around his finger.

'Gonna head out soon, Gornick?' He asks casually as a few of their coworkers push past. Ralph hums, pulling his coat and hat on.

'Yeah, I guess. Any plans for the weekend?'

'Nope. You?'

'Nope.' Ralph slips past him, and Jack is right at his back as they walk for the packed elevator, where they are pushed even closer. Jack smiles down at Ralph, and Ralph smiles back, remembering when he was an intern and how his entire face went hot whenever this happened before they hooked up for the first time. Jack leans down closer, breath warm on his neck, and plucks a piece of down sticking from his coat, holding it in front of his face. Ralph hums as the lift doors open, then he glances over his shoulder.

'Have a good weekend, Merridew.' He hurries into the parking lot and climbs into his car, texting Jack quickly.

**_I have to pick up some groceries. Spare key is in second pot beside the door. Order food?_ **

****

Jack is waiting for him in the apartment, just as he expected. But he doesn't expect is that Jack is patient, waiting for him to put his armful of paper bags down on the counter before standing and grabbing for his waist.

'Fuck, you've driven me crazy all day. Show me what you've got on, baby boy.' He whispers hotly, pushing him up against the door. Ralph hums, letting him suck a mark into his neck.

'Tell me about your day, first, love.' He hums, ducking under his arm to put away his groceries. He knew Jack well by now - he smiles as Jack follows, wraps his arms around his waist and tucks his chin on his shoulder.

'The boring, work-y version? Or the version where I did no work at all and stared at you longingly from across the office?'

'Those sound like the same story.'

'They are,' Jack plants a kiss to the side of his neck, walking with him as he moves to the fridge.

'So tell me how beautiful I look under shit office lighting.'

'Nah, you look just as dead as everyone else. But I kept imagining the red panties on you, and...'

'Not the red ones. Too predictable - they're your favorite.' Jack frowns and slides his hand against his rear.

'Shame. They look really nice on you.'

'They all look really nice on me,' Ralph finishes with the groceries, turning in his arms to kiss him. 'That's why you bought them.'

'True,' Jack presses him against the counters, taking hold of his wrists and pushing him back, lips on his throat. Ralph hums, pressing up against him.

'So I guess you didn't order food?' He murmurs, and Jack grabs for his hips instead, lifting him onto the counter.

'I thought it’d be better to get food after sex.' He palms at Ralph's hardening cock with a grin, and Ralph groans quietly.

'Bedroom then, babe,' His face pushes into his neck, and Jack hoists him up, carrying him the short distance, fingers pressing against the curve of his rear.

He presses him up against the door, supporting him with his knee as he opens the door, then lowers him to the bed. Ralph grins and wraps his arms around his neck, pulling him down close and kissing his ear, nuzzling into his cheek.

'God, you smell amazing,' He murmurs quietly, knees coming up to press to either side of his hips. Jack tugs at his belt blindly, kissing his temple.

'Okay - baby - just - '

'Don't be impatient,' Ralph whispers, rutting up against his hip, 'For once, lets take it slow.' Jack huffs out a sigh, pressing down on Ralph's waist. He kisses his cheekbone, then pulls away from him to admire him for a moment.

'I'll have you know that I'm far from impatient. I waited all afternoon to get you like this, and I don't want to wait a second more.'

'So demanding,' Ralph says, lazily arching his back, jaw pushing up and forwards as he rolls his head back, baring his neck. Jack presses a kiss to his fluttering pulse, bites it gently. He allows Ralph to push his jacket from his shoulders and to the floor.

Jack stops, then sits back, pushes his hair back from his face. He bites his lip, considers Ralph for a long beat. When he speaks, his voice is soft, revering.

'But if you want slow, I want slow. You know how much I love you,'

'I know,' Ralph matches his tone, reaches for him, 'I really don't mind, love, whatever we do tonight.' Then, he pulls Jack's belt free, opens the fly on his slacks. Jack slides his hands down his torso, then pops the bottom button on his shirt, working his way back up. He's more careful than usual, never looking away from Ralph. Once his shirt lies open, he plants a kiss over his heart before quickly loosening his tie and unbuttoning his own shirt, spending considerably less time on himself. Ralph lifts himself off the bed to pull his arms free of his shirt, then drops back onto the bed. Jack tugs Ralph’s belt free, dropping it away. He drags down the zipper in his fly, grinning at the first hint of colour he sees.

'You like?' Ralph asks, seeing his expression.

'Stand up,' Jack moves away from him, and Ralph rushes to comply, standing by the edge of the bed. Jack pulls his trousers down quickly, kissing along his hipbones. His fingers trace over his hips, then along the back of his thighs.

'So?'

'The colour is nice,' Jack pulls back, 'Turn around for me, baby boy.' Ralph snorts, does as he asks. Jack kisses the mesh back, running his fingers over the baby pink lace. 'Fuckin' hell, baby, you look so fuckin' good in these. Bend over.'

'You'll ruin them if you fuck me in them,' Ralph manages, groaning when Jack palms at his cock.

'I'll just open you up a bit,' He moves the panties to the side, biting at the curve of his arse, making him moan and bend over the bedside table. Jack moves to his knees behind him, tongue pressing into the dip above his tailbone.

'Fuck, Jack - '

'You have such a stellar ass, babe. I could eat you out all day if I was able to.' Ralph is about to complain about his choice of words when the flat of his tongue swipes over him, and he grabs at the bedside table, whimpering and pushing his hips out. Jack smiles, grabbing at him with an exaggerated moan, knowing how it drives him mad. He reaches around, pulling his cock free and stroking him gently. Ralph gives a strangled moan, pressing his forehead against the bedside table, one hand slapping back over one of Jack's.

'Fucking - shit, Jack,' Ralph bites at his knuckle, eyes screwing shut, 'I - fuck,'

'I know, baby boy,' Jack reaches around him, opening the drawer in the bedside table. He rubs circles into his hip, tongue pressing into him further. Without moving away, he pours lube over his fingers, making sure to coat them well, 'I know. Talk to me, baby, tell me how you feel,'

'It's good,' Ralph chokes out, 'Really good. Fuck. I - I love you so much, Jack,'

'I love you, too,' He kisses the back of his thigh, pressing a finger into him, 'I love you so much,' His other hand returns to his cock, stroking him slowly. He straightens up, bending over him and kissing his shoulder.

'How's this so far?'

'Good. Great. Fuck - so fucking amazing.' Jack laughs softly, mouth pressed against his shoulder.

'God, I love how receptive you are,' He murmurs, then sucks a mark into his shoulder, third finger teasing it's way against the ring of tight muscle, 'Relax a little for me, baby boy.' Ralph straightens up, moves back against him with another whine. Jack eases his fingers back, kissing the nape of his neck.

'Can I sit in your lap?' Ralph looks back over his shoulder, and Jack smiles.

'Of course, honey.' Jack sits back onto the bed, and Ralph turns into him, climbing onto him and pushing his face against his neck. Jack presses the same three fingers into him again, kissing his temple. Ralph curses and presses against him, arms wrapping around his neck, holding him close and kissing his cheek several times. Jack presses his hand up against him, curling his fingers in him with a soft hum. His fingers press against his prostate, and Ralph cries out loudly, arching into him, his nails sinking into his shoulders.

'This good?' Jack breathes, kisses his cheek, and Ralph curses again, nods. His mouth agape, he lets out another strained cry, moving back enough to look between them, rolling his hips against his fingers desperately.

'So good. So good. Fuck - keep it up, and you won’t even need to fuck me. I could come just from this.'

'What about me, hm?'

'Fucking - I'll suck you off,' Ralph mutters, waving his hand dismissively. His face pushes against his neck again, and he falls silent - save for a few whimpers and moans.

'Hm. Well, I’d like to fuck you, so - ' Jack eases his fingers from him, and Ralph whines at the loss, grabbing for his wrist.

'Please, baby, I - ' Jack says his name in warning, and Ralph lets go, sitting back in his lap.

'Lie down. Leave the panties on - I’ll send them to the dry cleaners later.' Ralph does as he’s told, tugging the underwear back into place, his face, neck and upper chest flushed. Jack stands, works his work slacks down, kicking them away as he steps out of them. Then, he takes off his briefs, and takes his half-hard cock in hand. He runs his hand over his length once, before picking up the bottle of lube and pouring some into his hand. Ralph watches, almost mesmerized, flushing darker at the slick sounds of Jack’s hand moving over his length.

'I was thinking,'

'Uh oh,'

'Piss off,' Ralph smiles up at him, shifting into a move comfortable position, 'I was thinking about my promotion.'

'Self involved prat,'

'True. But my new office is stellar. More importantly, my new desk. You can’t see under it from the front - it’s closed off.'

'That sounds like a problem for you, Mr. Beanpole.'

’Fuck off, let me finish,' Jack kneels onto the bed, now fully hard. He reaches between Ralph's legs, pushing the underwear aside and spreading the remaining lube over his entrance, 'But maybe I could call you into my office some day, and you could... Acquaint yourself with the underneath of my new desk. Preferably while I'm with a client. And maybe, another time, I can ask you to stay behind, and you could acquaint yourself with the top of my desk, too.' Ralph snorts, spreading his knees and lifting his hips.

'Are you asking me to become your office whore?'

'Don’t pretend you’re not into it, too.' Jack climbs between his legs, lining himself up with him. He kisses his neck, and Ralph hums, slinging an arm across his back and a leg across his back.

'I'm not saying I'm not into it,' Jack slides home, and he swears softly, 'Remember our first time?'

'Are you getting sappy and nostalgic on me, Gornick?'

'How can I get sappy and nostalgic? We fucked on my desk. It was eight months ago.' Jack rolls his hips forward, and Ralph huffs out, grabbing for his shoulder.

'Oh yeah. I had to buy you a new lamp. I thought you were talking about the first time we fucked at my place.' Jack starts a steady pace of rocking into him, breath warm on his shoulder.

’That was nice,' Ralph pulls him closer, pushing his forehead against his hand, 'But no. I’m not opposed to sucking your cock under your desk. Maybe even getting you fired - it sure would knock you down a peg or two.'

'Everyone already knows we’re fucking. We're not subtle.' Another thrust, harder now. His bed knocks back against the wall, and Ralph curses, looking back over his shoulder.

'Careful.' He says, and Jack mutters an apology, returning to his previous pace, hand sliding between them and into the panties, stroking him slowly. Ralph’s voice shakes as he continues, 'Not officially. You’re just my boss, according to HR.'

'HR can suck my dick. Can we continue this conversation after? I like it when you babble about how big my cock is, and this is kinda - '

'Oh, yeah.' Ralph shifts down the bed, lifting his hips and wrapping both arms around Jack’s neck. 'But. Yes. I'd like for you to call me into your brand new office some day.' Jack bites at his neck, and Ralph closes his eyes, letting him fuck into him at a brisk pace. He hits his prostate, and he moans loudly. Jack allows him to slip away into where he goes during sex, mouth going in an O, eyes screwing shut. He whispers his name when he thrusts again, and Jack hums in reply, squeezing his waist.

’You're doing so well, baby boy. You take my cock so nicely, I'm so proud of you. Lemme hear you, love, come on,’ He gives the base of Ralph’s cock a squeeze before moving up to circle his fingers around the head. Ralph cries out, arching off the bed and into his touch. 'That's it. Come on pretty boy, you can give me a little more, can't you?’

'I love you,' Ralph whispers, hips rolling up into his hand, then he moans in desperation.

'I love you, too, Ralph,' The boy cries out louder, and Jack is relentless on the head of his cock - he knew it was the fastest way to get him to come, get him to reduce to a babbling mess.

'I'm close,'

'Come for me, baby boy,' The sound Ralph makes is almost a sob, 'God, you're so perfect, such a pretty little thing. Delicate, sweet, flawless. My perfect little baby, hm?'

'Yeah. I’m yours, only yours, always yours.'

'Yeah? Come for me, then,' He squeezes his cock then, and Ralph cries out, spilling into the pink lace. He tightens around Jack, and Jack groans, adjusting his hold on him to fuck into that tightness before he relaxes again, rides down from the wave. He presses his face down close, fingers pressing hard and unrelenting into his skin, sure to leave marks behind. Ralph moans softly, distantly, curling his hips into him. His nails press into his shoulders, and Jack wraps an arm around his raised hips, thrusting into him a final three times before he comes, moaning his name.

He lets his arms give out, rolling onto his side and holding Ralph to his chest as he pulls out, kissing his ear.

'That was good,' He whispers, and Ralph hums in agreement, fingers drifting over his shoulders.

'Love you,' His voice is distant, dreamy - like it always is after sex. Jack hums, moving back to look at him. Ralph smiles up at him, sleepy and satisfied.

'God, you're so fuckin' pretty,' Jack murmurs, brushing his hair from his eyes. He kisses his Cupid’s bow, and Ralph hums, 'Are you okay? I didn't go to hard?'

'It was perfect. And you’re too hot and sweaty right now - I don’t wanna cuddle.' Jack nods, lets him go, and Ralph hums, takes his hand before moving away, kissing his fingertips. 'How about you? Are you okay?'

'I’m amazing. Hungry, but amazing.'

'Order something, then. I don't mind what you get.' Ralph pushes his cheek into the pillow, closes his eyes. Jack moves closer for a moment to kiss the curve of his shoulder.

'Are you gonna sleep?'

'Mhm. Unless you want me to stay up?'

'I'm fine. Wake you when food’s here?'

'Yes please,’ Ralph opens an eye and smiles up at him, kisses him. It’s ridiculously soft and chaste, and Jack can’t help but grin down at him.

'Alright, beautiful. I’ll let you sleep.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the panties are inspired by ones that i personally own so uh. [yeehaw](https://www.lasenza.ca/pd/brazilian-panty-11125780.html)


	55. XLIX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super quick jalph sugar daddy au for an anonymous asker yeehaw
> 
> I Don’t Know How Private Jets Work And I Don't Care About Accuracy This Is Just Smut

'If you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go?'

'Hm?'

'Where would you go?'

Ralph's chest is still heaving, and there's a sheen of sweat on his brow. Beside him, Jack is sitting up in bed, reaching for the water bottle he tends to keep on the bedside table.

Ralph looks up at him, unfocused and bleary - like he always is, after they fuck. Jack looks down at him, soft and vulnerable and adoring - like he always is, after they fuck.

'Why?'

'Just asking,' It was never just asking with Jack. Ralph had learned that rather early on in their relationship - he had gone with Jack to get a gift for his sister, and his eyes had lingered too long on an expensive watch. On the car ride home, Jack had kissed his neck, and asked if he liked the watch, claimed to just be asking. Ralph looks at his watch now, and bites his lip.

'New York.' Jack hums, hand going to the back of his head, pulling him close. His fingers comb through his hair in a gentle brush, and he smiles down at him.

'New York,' He repeats softly, and Ralph pushes his cheek into his thigh.

'Are we going to be flying business or coach?' Jack sighs.

'You know me too well. But haven't I mentioned? I've got my own jet.' Ralph sits up, looks at him incredulously.

'Your own - of course you do.' Ralph slumps back down, head dropping to his shoulder. 'And you never thought to mention that until now?'

'I haven’t thought to take you on a trip until now. You don't seem like the travelling type.' Jack's arm slings over his shoulder, and Ralph burrows against his side eagerly.

'I haven't really gotten the chance to find out wether I am or not.' Ralph closes his eyes as Jack’s fingertips smooth over his temple, down the side of his face.

'You will next week, I suppose. Let's talk more in the morning, yes?' Ralph turns onto Jack's side, curling against him as he presses a chaste kiss to his cheek.

'Don't stay up all night again.'

'Yessir,' Jack gives a mock salute, but Ralph isn't looking at him anymore, arms curling around one of his, effectively indisposing him from doing anything really productive. Biting his lip, Jack looks down at him, then turns off their lamp, resting his cheek in his hair. 'Goodnight, beautiful.'

 

On the day of their flight to New York, Jack is twice as controlling as usual. He packs for Ralph, and doesn’t let him see the contents of the suitcase. Instead, he plies him with neck kisses and nibblings on his ear, promising that he would like what he packed. Ralph glances over at the bags, and frowns.

'You packed comfortable clothes, right? Only one formal outfit, for the show?'

'Relax, beautiful. I've got it handled.' Jack steers him into the hall, then sits him down in a plush chair by the stairs.

'The car will be here any moment. Just - sit there, and do what you do best. Look pretty.'

 

Once they’re in the car, though, it’s a completely different story.

Jack is gentle and caring, pressing kisses down the side of his neck and rubbing his hand over his thigh.

'Was I being too mean?'

'No,' Ralph sighs and closes his eyes, cheek in his hair.

'You can be honest,'

'I am. I don't lie to you.'

'I know.' Jack kisses his jaw, intentionally avoiding the spot that he knows makes Ralph melt into him. 'I'm sorry anyways.'

 

The car pulls up to an airport hangar, and Jack hurries around the front of the car to open Ralph’s door for him, stooping to kiss him. Behind him, a flight attendant pulls their bags from the trunk, their driver helping her carry them into the plane. Jack takes Ralph's hand and leads him forward.

'I still can't believe you have a private plane.' Jack grins and kisses his temple, pushing him forward gently when they reach the set of stairs.

'After you,' He says gently, and Ralph scoffs, rolling his eyes playfully as he climbs the stairs. Behind him, Jack pinches the back of his upper thigh, making him squeak. They climb into the plane, and Jack presses close, wrapping his arms around his waist, kissing his jaw.

'We're taking off in about twenty minutes.' He says, and Ralph hums, letting him lead them to a pair of seats behind another two. Ralph looks up at him then, and bites his lip, brows furrowing. 'It can get kinda cold when we go up - I'm gonna get a blanket. Do you want anything?'

'I'm fine,' Ralph smiles shyly as he watches Jack go, and sits down, clasping his hands in his lap.

Jack returns and drops the thin blanket onto his lap, then drops unceremoniously into his seat, arm slinging across Ralph's shoulders as he calls over one of the flight attendants, smiling up at her easily and asking about her kids. Ralph leans forward, pressing his forehead to his chest, and Jack doesn’t react other than to rest his hand on the back of his head, continuing his conversation even as they start to take off.

Finally, the woman dismisses herself, and Jack pulls the blanket over his lap as well as Ralph's, arm dropping from his shoulder. He produces a stick of gum from seemingly nowhere, chewing his own already.

'For your ears,' He says, and Ralph takes it, not noticing when Jack's hand works under the blanket until his fingers work over the waistband of his sweats. Ralph looks at him, not daring to say anything, biting his lip. Jack tilts his head in a silent question - _Can I?_ \- and Ralph nods, face hot as he glances over at the two flight attendants. He leans over again, tucking his face into his neck.

'Daddy,' He breathes - partly because he likes the way it rolls off his tongue, mostly because he likes the way Jack tenses under him when he says it - 'They're watching.'

'No they aren't. Besides - I pay them too much to care.' Jack's fingers slide over his growing erection, and Ralph lets out a choked sound. 'Just chew your gum, baby.' Ralph grabs at his bicep, doing as he's told. Jack wraps his hand around him as they lift into the air, and Ralph chokes again, whining quietly.

'Fuck,' He croaks, and Jack smiles, rubbing his thumb over the head of his cock.

'Breathe, baby,' He murmurs, hand sliding up so he rubs his palm against his cock, gathering the precum leaking already. Ralph's thighs tense, and his fingers dig into Jack's bicep. 'Breathe.' Ralph screws his eyes shut and lets out a shaky breath, and Jack hums, obviously pleased.

'Is this okay?'

'This is more than okay. Fuck. You're such a good boy,' He murmurs, and Ralph knows he notices the way he blushes from the praise, cock twitching in his hand, because he doesn't stop the praise. 'Such a good boy for me - you always take everything I give you so well - my fingers, my cock, my tongue. My good boy.'

'Your good boy,' Ralph slurs, pressing so close he's almost in his lap, far beyond caring about anyone who may be watching. Jack pulls back, looks down at him fondly.

'Yeah, baby. All mine.' Ralph rolls his head back, exposing his pulse, and Jack immediately sucks a dark mark into the tanned skin, feeling his heartbeat against his lips, hard and pounding. He bends his head further, nipping along his collarbone. Jack is pumping his hand in earnest now, other hand pressing against his thigh.

'Daddy,' Ralph whispers again, and Jack presses a hard kiss to his collarbone.

'You're doing so well, sweet boy. You're such a good boy. My perfect boy.' He coos, and Ralph sobs, looking away and out the plane window. Jack leans close, nose pushing to his ear, and he grabs for his wrist, then laces his fingers together. 'I love you, baby. I would do anything for you, you know that?'

'I love you,' Ralph murmurs, turning his head back towards him, tucking his face in close, 'I love you.' Jack squeezes his shaft, and he moans now, filthy and loud, and Jack grins, then kisses him - hard.

'Come for me, baby. I know you're close - let me hear you come.' He whispers into his mouth, and Ralph sobs again, lurching into Jack as he does just as he's told, his come spilling over the back of Jack's hand and down the curve of his wrist. Tears drip onto Jack's neck, and Ralph shudders through the orgasm, slacking to shivering as he catches his breath. Jack pulls away and pulls his hand free, wiping it on Ralph's jeans.

Ralph turns away from him to fit his front to his back, looking out the window again, head dropping to Jack's shoulder as he props his feet up in the seat beside them.

'You okay? That was pretty intense,' Jack murmurs, unsure of if he could touch Ralph. He wanted to - he wanted to wrap him up in an embrace and never let go, wanted to press a million kisses over the side of his face - but sometimes after scenes like that, Ralph was too overwhelmed.

'I'm okay,' He says, voice small. Carefully, Jack wipes the tears gathered in his eyes, then kisses his temple lightly.

'Why are you crying, babe?'

'I dunno. It was just - a lot.'

'What do you need?'

'Hold me. Please.' Jack doesn’t hesitate to do it, and Ralph presses as close as he possibly can.

'You're ruining my reputation with my workers, you know.' Jack tells him, and Ralph smiles, fingers running over his knuckles. 'And I did mean it. You know. The whole - thing.'

'The I love you?'

'Uh. Sure. That.' Ralph lifts his head, looking at him. The smile he gives him next is so genuine, so full of joy and contentment and serene satisfaction, and he kisses him quickly, softly.

'I love you, too.'


	56. L

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some rough ralger sex for an anonymous asker but in a canon-ish verse this time woohoo i dont write that enough
> 
> but uh. dubcon lmfao.
> 
> (THEY ARE NOT TWELVE PLS DON'T WORRY)

The sand beneath Ralph's knees is even hotter than the bonfire that burns at his back. Merridew's gaze is even hotter than both of those things, as cold as it is. His long fingers curl around that fucking stick, tighten, and the sharpened end is lowered, pointed to Ralph. He leans away, jaw wound taut, and Merridew grins, wicked and dark.

'Look at him. Cowering on his knees for me. You chose him to lead over me? _Look at him_. Look at me. At us.' Ralph looks from Jack to Roger and Maurice, who stand on either side of him, not moving. Everyone stares at him, waiting for him to make a move. Jack leans forward, biting his lip. 'Hm,  _Chief_? What's your next move? C'mon, I know you've got something turnin' around in that brain of yours. I know you're more than just a pretty face.' Ralph doesn't speak, and Jack sighs, slumping back in his chair.

'God, you're boring. Put up a fight. First, you practically throw yourself in the camp, with that shit job of hiding. _C'mon_!' He stands now, grabbing a fistful of hair and wrenching his head back. Ralph can't help but whimper, and Jack blinks in surprise, suddenly extremely in the reaction he got. He gives another pull, harder this time, and Ralph opens his mouth in a silent cry. Jack grins again, crouching down close.

'You like that?' He whispers, and Ralph closes his eyes, biting down on his lip, hard. His hand drops to the back of his neck, his touch a different kind of burning, the same one that has started to ache in Ralph's belly, his chest. He looks up into those cold eyes, and Jack seems mesmerized as he speaks louder, addressing his tribe again.

'We'll finish in the morning, after the hunt. All of you, go to bed.' Ralph suddenly hates the thought of being alone with Jack, even though his entire body aches for it. He looks over his shoulder at the thinning crowd, finds Roger watching them with a new intensity.

'Chief,' He says, probably the first thing Ralph has ever heard him say. Jack looks at him now, and a silent understanding crosses between them.

The other boy crosses the sand to stand over them as the last boys disappear, and Jack stands.

'That's a pretty sight,' Roger murmurs, and Ralph almost doesn't make it out. Almost. He shifts again, tugging at the restraint around his wrists.

'Yeah. 's a shame.'

'You don't have to kill him.'

'You know I do, Rodge.' Ralph doesn't expect _that_. Or the hand on Roger's arm. And, suddenly, he feels like he's viewing something very, very private. Roger nods, looking down at Ralph again, tilting his head and considering him for a long, silent moment. Ralph fidgets under the weight of their gazes, and Roger finally speaks.

'Well, might as well have some fun with him.' Jack's grin returns at that.

'Why do you think I sent the littluns away? He's too good to share. Well. Almost too good to share.' That hand on Roger's arm again, lingering this time, with new intent. Then, Jack grabs Ralph's face, fingers pressing to his cheeks and forcing his mouth open. Two fingers push into his mouth, and he recoils. Blunt, bitten nails press into his tongue, and he cries out around them.

'Bite down, and I'll rip your head off, bitch.' Jack hisses, then the fingers push deeper, and Ralph splutters around them, straining against his restraints. Roger moves around him, and the remainder of his shirt is torn off, pushed down his arms to hang by his wrists. Jack pulls his fingers free, then drops to his knees. He kisses him, hard and unforgiving, yanking his hair. Before Ralph knows what's happening, his head is being wrenched back again, and Jack bites at his pulse.

 _He may very well tear my throat out_ , Ralph thinks as he whimpers. Jack's lips press to his bobbing Adam's apple, then he bites it, hard, sucking at his skin. Ralph had forgotten about Roger until his hand is on his lower back, lips on his shoulder.

'Please,' Ralph sobs out, chest heaving and crotch aching. Roger bites down hard enough to draw blood, and Ralph feels it drip down his back when he pulls away. 'Please.'

'Please what, Golden Boy?'

'Please, don't - ' Jack's hand goes to his crotch, and Ralph lurches forward, ' - don't stop,' He finishes, gasping, and Jack snickers. Roger bites at the junction of his neck with the same intent to break skin, and Ralph moans this time, fingers stretching out then clenching again. Jack lifts his head and watches them for a moment, rubbing at his growing erection through his briefs.

'I should this ages ago. _We_ should’ve done this ages ago. Look at him,' Jack’s eyes go from Ralph to Roger, 'I knew he was a slut from the moment I saw him.' Roger grunts, nose pressing to Ralph's shoulder, hand going to his ribs, fingers pressing into his skin. Jack presses his hand over Roger's wrist, and then he kisses the space between his eyes, a surprisingly tender move. He smiles fondly, letting his hand drop to Ralph's thigh.

'Chief?' Roger asks softly, mouth lifting from Ralph's shoulder so his chin can rest on his shoulder, arms coming around his waist, 'Do you want me to get him ready?'

'God, you don't even have to ask.' Jack sits down, and before Ralph can process, his cheek is pressed to his lap, arse pushed up into the air, and his briefs are pulled down around his knees. He grabs at Jack's thigh and looks up at the redhead, face hotter than ever at the unfamiliar slide of calloused hands over his rear. Jack presses his thumb into his mouth, cooing down at him sweetly.

'You ever have anything up your arse, pretty boy?' Ralph shakes his head, shivering when Roger's lips press to his tailbone. Jack reaches up and grabs his rear, squeezing harshly, 'Hm. That's gonna change tonight, I hope you know. Are you a screamer?' He pushes his thumb in further, adding his index finger, instead of letting Ralph answer. He whines and blinks up at him. 'No matter. Roger'll muffle them just fine.'

At the mention of his name, Roger's tongue presses to Ralph's entrance, and he arches into Jack with a louder whine, nails pressing into his thighs. Jack hums, hand on his rear sliding up his back, blunt nails digging hard into his skin and surely leaving blood, definitely leaving scratches of raised, red skin. Roger grabs at Ralph's hips, pulling him back and against his mouth, and he licks into him with quick, efficient strokes of his broad, warm tongue. Jack pulls his fingers free to cup his chin, pulling him forward so he's stretched between the two. Ralph's knees spread and push into the sand, and he rocks his hips back and forth.

'That's it, pretty boy. Get off on it - show us how much of a cockslut you are.' Ralph moans in earnest then, and Jack leans down quickly to swallow it in a kiss, teeth on his bottom lip. 'Moan more for us. C'mon, show us what you've got.' He urges against his mouth, and Ralph moans again, grabbing at his bicep. Roger pulls back, pushing a spit-slick finger into him, the digit curling up into his tightness immediately, his other hand going under him to grab his cock.

'Chief, he's so hard,' He murmurs, almost in awe, cheek resting on the small of his back.

'Don't jerk him off. He only cums after we have.'

'Yessir,' Roger slurs, sucking marks along the small of his back. His hand slides up his stomach to rest on his pectoral, fingers pressing to his skin. He slides his finger in and out of Ralph a few times, before working a second finger into him, the two fingers wriggling inside of him, making Ralph let out another hoarse groan, then a broken sob as he slumps into Jack's hands, letting him hold him up on his hands and knees.

'I shouldn't want this as much as I do,' He croaks out, 'You're a - you're both murderers. Animals.'

'If we're so bad, what are you, submitting to us like this? I would say it's worse to be a bitch than it is to be a dog.'

'I should hate this. Hate you.'

Jack just grunts in reply. Roger's fingers are gone, and Jack lets him go, standing again. Ralph barely catches himself from planting his face in the sand, but Roger is quick to replace Jack, shorts already gone and cock half hard. Behind him, Jack's fingertips trail teasingly over his rear, and there's a wet sliding sound of skin on soaked skin.

'You should see you two - you thought just the slut on his knees was a pretty sight? This is a fucking masterpiece.'

'It would be if he would just fucking suck me - ' Roger's grasp on his hair is crueler than Jack's, somehow. He wrenches him up and crams himself into his mouth, and Ralph coughs at the stretching of the corners of his mouth as he works down his length, tongue pressing at the underside of his cock. Roger presses down on the back of his skull, and Ralph struggles to breathe through his nose, tears springing into his eyes. When his nose is pressed to his stomach, Roger bucks his hips up into his mouth, making him cough and splutter, trying to pull back. ' - There we go. Fuck, you should've tried his mouth, Chief. It's amazing.'

'Another time,' Jack says distractedly, and Ralph stiffens at the words, but doesn't dare to point out the mistake. If Roger notices it, he doesn't say anything either, letting Ralph ease back up so he can thrust into his mouth further. Jack gives each arse cheek a firm swat, then he pinches the backs of his thighs, his taint. Then, he moves over, looking down at them. 'Do you think I need more spit? I don't want to rip him on the first go.' Roger looks away from Ralph, who can't bring himself to look up. He felt his cock against his cheek earlier, and that was when he was soft. Even if he wasn't a grower, his cock was longer than Ralph expected Jack's to be.

'Hm. A bit more. Do you need my help?' Jack grunts and wanders away again, spitting loudly on his hand.

'Nah, I've got it handled.' More of the wet sliding, then his hand is against his entrance, spreading some spit there. His cock is blunt against him, and Roger lets Ralph pull off his cock completely, and he already bends to bite at his collarbone, grabbing for his hand. Jack hooks his thumb into him, spreading him open again, and he groans, head pushing into him slowly. 'Fuck, he's so fuckin' tight, Rodge. Fucking hell - ' Ralph cries out loudly as he works past the fluttering ring of muscle, hips moving away. Jack is over his back completely now, arm braced across his neck. Roger's hand smooths over Ralph's forehead, and he actually smiles.

'Try to relax. I'm already pretty close, you won't have to worry about me for much longer. Then it's just a little longer, then you can rest. Just a little longer.' Ralph lets out a shaky breath, going limp. Jack slides home with a curse, sitting back and grabbing his waist. He allows Ralph a few moments to accustom to the burn of the stretch, then he sets a fast, hard pace, and Roger taps the side of his neck, impatient. Shakily, Ralph lifts up and takes him into his mouth, bobbing his head and hollowing his cheeks around him. Instead of fucking up into his throat, Roger just hums and rests his hand on his back, letting him rock against him. Jack barely moves in him, but the painful friction is almost too much for Ralph regardless.

'We really hit the motherload, huh?' Jack grunts out, barely having broken a sweat.

'Shame about tomorrow.' Roger murmurs, and Jack grunts again.

'Fuck. Oh yeah.' His hips falter, and then Jack's arm slides around his hips with a certain possessiveness to it. 'I was the only one enforcing the whole killing him thing. We can talk about that later.' Ralph wants to object, then Jack suddenly moves forward, hitting a bunch of nerves that makes Ralph lurch forward, choking around Roger's length and moaning in frustration. Roger's hand slaps over his head, making him flinch, and his hips thrust up again, now a different kind - he thrusts up into him with quick twitches of his hips, then he seizes his hair again, pulling him off as he comes over his neck and chest with a soft groan and curse. As soon as he recovers, he pushes away from Ralph to stand and recover, pulling his shorts up again. Behind Ralph, the other two talk softly, and Ralph looks over his shoulder just in time to see them kiss briefly, Jack smiling in reassurance to Roger.

'You're my best boy, Rodge. You know this.' Jack says softly, never faltering in his thrusts, and Roger nods, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. 'I won't put him over you. Ever. Besides - you like him, too. I can tell. He won't just be for me - he can be yours, too.'

'Okay,' Roger says, even softer, and then steps back to watch Jack finish. Jack catches Ralph looking, and gives him a lazy smirk.

'Like what you see?' He asks, louder, and Ralph whimpers. 'You want to watch us snog? God, I knew you were a slut, but I never pegged you for a pervert, too.' Jack grabs his shoulder and hoists him up so his back is pressed to his front, and he bites at his neck, hand curling around his cock. He doesn't get as deep, and Ralph is glad for it, clinging to the hand keeping him upright as Jack pounds into him at the same relentless pace, licking at the bites on his shoulder. Ralph closes his eyes and lets it all wash over him, the pain of Jack in him and the pleasure of his hand around him, the strangeness of his tongue on open wounds.

'How are you gonna kill me?' He gasps out, and Jack’s hand tightens across his chest.

'Shut up,'

'I want to be prepared,' Jack bites at the mark, and Ralph yelps.

'Don’t rub it in,' He hisses, and Ralph huffs, 'Spoiled fucking brat, always getting your way - I can't even kill you right.'

'What do you mea - ' Jack bends them forward suddenly, hunching over him and panting in his ear, movements stopped. Ralph stills under him, waiting as he catches his breath, hand rubbing over his hip.

'Chief?' Ralph jumps at the other voice, having forgotten about Roger.

'I don't want to come just yet. Fuck, he’s so fucking tight - ' Jack's forehead pushes to Ralph's shoulder for a moment before he starts moving again, harder than before. His hand is like a vice over his cock, and Ralph moans in distant pain, going mostly silent as he waits for Jack to finish. Jack sends him over the edge without a word, but the harshness of his grip ruins it, leaving him gasping in frustration as come drips to the sand beneath him, still feeling like he was just on the edge without having fallen off completely.

He pulls out of him suddenly, spilling over his back, and Ralph shudders, knees dropping from under him as he curls in on himself, shaking from head to toe. Jack stands, pulling his shorts up again, crosses to Roger. Ralph watches from the ground as he braces his hand across the back of his neck, their foreheads pushing together. He murmurs something, and Roger visibly preens from the praise. Then, he turns back to Ralph, and looks down at him with the same stormy, hot gaze as before all of this happened.

'Clean him up. Tie him up. We won’t kill him - yet.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need to finish these there is no reason for these to take so long fjlkdslj


	57. LI

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> just a quick lil thing i crapped out so uhhHhhHHHHHhhHHHHHhhhh
> 
> ralph has an exhibition kink so. yup.

Jack's hand has been on Ralph's thigh since they all settled down on Simon's sectional to watch a movie. Ralph hadn't thought anything of it, had leaned into him and pressed a chaste kiss to his cheek. He should've, especially when Jack pulled a blanket over their lap and kissed his temple, then the spot by his eye, then his cheekbone.

Then, the lights go off. Jack's hand moves down his thigh to squeeze his knee. Ralph rests his head on his shoulder and curls his feet under his rear, hand placing over Jack's.

'Have I told you how nice you look today?' Jack murmurs, kissing the side of his nose. Ralph hums, focused on the movie. 'Because you look incredible. Wow. Fucking hell, you look so good right now.' His hand tracks back up his thigh, fingers dipping along the inside, running over his skin teasingly. Ralph’s breath catches, and he pushes his nose against his jaw.

'Jack, someone will see,' He chokes out, and Jack hums.

'They’re all watching the movie, relax,' Ralph bites his lip when his fingers run over his quickly-growing erection, 'Besides - I know you like this,' He breathes, and Ralph barely holds back a whimper. 'I know you like the danger of being caught. And I know you love the thought of someone watching me take you apart.'

'That's...' Ralph doesn't object, pushing his face against his neck and grabbing his arm. Jack grins and kisses the top of his head, glancing over at the others. His fingertips ghost over Ralph's cock, and the blond bites into his neck to stifle a moan.

'See? You're already hard. Is that pretty little cock dripping for me?’ Jack breathes, and Ralph's nails dig into his arm.

'Shut up,' Ralph's voice is choked with desperation. Jack hums, grasping him through his trousers, rubbing his thumb over the head of his cock.

'Sure feels like it is. Do you want me to take it out for you?'

'Yes,' Ralph breathes, and Jack does just that, wasting no time in stroking him fully, eyes on the movie. Ralph’s breath is hot against his neck as he bucks up into his hand.

'Is Ralph asleep already?' It's Eric, across the couch. Jack looks over at him and shrugs a shoulder, his hand running down his back.

'Do you want me to wake him?' Ralph moans in protest - Jack knows he’s bad about hiding things, and it would be way too obvious if everyone could see him. 'Or I can just watch it with him again another night.' Eric shrugs and turns back to the movies, and Ralph squeezes his arm so hard that Jack is sure he draws blood.

'Asshole,' He chokes out, and Jack grins, stopping his movements to push his hand into his briefs, attention directed to his perineum. He rubs his fingertip along the strip of soft skin. Ralph lets out a frustrated huff, grinding up into his hand desperatey, hand going to his back. He whispers his name, and Jack grunts, turning back to the telly.

'Jack, you ass, I need - more.'

'Don't be a slut.' His hips angle in an attempt to get his finger to slide into home - he’d be happy with one, really, if Jack crooked his finger in the way that he knows he loves. Jack tuts, hand pulling back from his briefs to idly stroke his cock with a light touch that just tickles more than anything.

'Jack - ' He whimpers, fully arching off the couch now, ' - Please, baby, I'll do anything.'

'Hm. You’re just a little desperate slut, huh?'

'Yes, sir,' Jack grinds the palm of his hand to his cock, and it’s all Ralph can do not to cry out.

Jack’s next move is risky, riskier than any other choice made that night. He sucks a mark into Ralph's jaw, then kisses the mark sweetly, whispering praise. Roger looks up sharply from his spot beside Maurice, and Jack gives him a knowing smile, to which he flushes and looks away again.

Then, Jack settles back against the couch, and Ralph is forced to huddle against his chest, whimpering softly as Jack simply teases circles around the oversensitive head of his cock.

'I love how sensitive you are,' He whispers softly, and Ralph huddled closer.

'Stop talking before someone figures out what’s happening,' He hisses, and Jack chuckles, using the cover of a shitty joke made in the movie. He switched tactics, tracing four fingernails around the head of his cock, looping down the shaft and then back up again, where he focuses most of his efforts. This has Ralph squirming against him, struggling to hold back the desperate moans that are just begging to get out.

Jack knows him well - he was close to the edge. First, he would squirm. Then, his shoulders would jump and he would twitch forward, whole body shaking with the force of keeping his inevitable release back for a few moments. Then, he would go still, then buckle forward. For at least half an hour after, he would be shaking, no matter how poor the actual orgasm was - and he would be soft and vulnerable and Jack would have to whisper sweet nothings, press kisses to wherever he could reach, murmur encouragement and praise.

And Jack wanted to see how he would do it now - it was always a loud, dramatic affair with Ralph, par to the course of a lot of things with Ralph.

'I want you to come for me, baby boy. Right into my hand, give me all you have.' He whispers. And, sure enough, Ralph starts to lurch forward, looking like he does when he cries and tries to hide it. Jack pulls him into his lap, beyond caring how it looks, kissing along his jaw and neck. Finally, Ralph stills, head lolled back on his neck, and Jack waits for the spill over the back of his hand, all of the tenseness in Ralph's body to melt away. The former happens, but there’s no melting into him - he goes straight into the shaking as he turns in his lap, arms wrapping around his neck.

As he’s talking Ralph down, hand rubbing his ribs over one certain spot, Jack’s phone buzzes with a message from Roger.

_That was the hottest thing I've ever seen._

Jack smiles at Roger as his phone buzzes again.

_Tell me the next time you do this. I wanna see our boy squirm for us - at a better angle this time._


	58. LII

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> possessive!jack for.......................................... the love of my life,,, charlotte  
> i lub u

If Jack cares that Ralph is on a date, he doesn't show it.

Ralph knows he sees him - he agreed to come to this bar because he knew that Jack would be here. And he makes a big show of taking his date's hand and pulling him close, letting him kiss down his neck.

'God, you're exactly the kind of boy I like,' His date growls, but Ralph is only paying half attention to him.

'Oh? How?' His date is older, maybe mid-thirties. The kind of man who has a wife and kids and pretends that he's working late when he comes to bars like this, with boys like him.

'Young, desperate. Slutty,' He mouths along his jaw, and Ralph fakes an obscene moan, hand pressing over his crotch. 'Let's get out of here. I'll get a motel room, and you can show me just how slutty you can be.' Ralph gives Jack one more chance to get up before he's pulling his date in for a hard kiss, full of tongue. There's sudden movement out of the corner of his eye, and then there's the sound of a shattering bottle, and his date recoils back, holding the back of his head.

'What the  _fuck,_ bro?'

'We're leaving,' Jack stands with the neck of a beer bottle in his hand. Ralph stares up at him in surprise - the worst he's done is give someone a black eye. He licks his lips, thinks of fighting him, making him angrier. The angrier he was, the rougher he was with him when they get to his flat. ' _Ralph_.'

'Sorry,' Ralph mutters to his date as he crawls over the man's lap. Jack grabs his wrist and pulls him out of the bar. His grip is so tight that Ralph knows it'll bruise later.

'You didn't have to do that,' Ralph says softly, as soon as they're out of the bar. Jack doesn't look back on him, but his grip tightens.

'I know it turns you on,' Jack says, as casually as he would about the the weather, 'When I'm violent. There isn't much to getting you there - you like it when I'm rough, and you like it when I show that I can fuck anyone up for you. And of course,' He stops, looks at him now, and pulls him to his chest, kisses his ear. 'You like it when I tell you how much of a good boy you are for me.' His voice goes soft and fond, and Ralph shivers when his thumb runs down the side of his face. 'Am I right, pretty baby?'

'Yes, sir,' Ralph croaks, and Jack bites his earlobe, pulls him forward by the shirt.

'Get in the car. We'll talk when we get to mine.' He kisses his neck once, right on the spot he knows drives Ralph crazy, then lets him go, unlocking his car. He opens the passenger door for Ralph, looking as bored as he was in the bar, even with the beer bottle in his hand. But as Ralph climbs into the car, he grabs his hand, rubbing his thumb over his sore wrist. 'When will you get it through your head? You're mine, and I don't share.'

 

As soon as they pull into the parking garage for Jack's building, his passive expression melts away, and he turns in his seat.

'C'mere,' He growls, moving his seat back to allow more room. Ralph pauses, then unbuckles his safety belt, climbing awkwardly into his lap, careful not to hit the horn. Jack kisses him, hard, hands immediately going up the back of his shirt. 'You're gonna be the death of me,' He says softly, biting at his lip. Ralph grabs for his shirt collar, holding him close.

'Shouldn't we go upstairs?'

'In a moment,' Jack pulls back to kiss down his neck, 'Take this off.'

'Upstairs.' But Jack pulls insistently at his shirt.

'Off, babe.' Ralph doesn't complain, raising his arms and smiling as Jack pulls his shirt. Jack bends and kisses a mole just under his right pec, tossing the shirt into the backseat. 'Now you gotta let me drive you home.' Ralph kisses his cheek, leans close.

'If you play your cards right, I was thinkin' of staying the night anyways.' Jack hums and opens the door, pokes at his side with his keys. Ralph climbs out of the car, wrapping his arms around his waist. Jack gets out, kisses the curve of his shoulder, then urges him out of the garage and down the hall to the lift.  
While they wait, Jack kisses the back of his neck, then across the span of his shoulders. They're both aware of the doorman watching them closely, but they don't care. The lift doors slide open, and Ralph steps in without any urging from Jack, already pressed up to the wall. Jack presses the button for his floor, then turns to Ralph. He takes his face in his hands and kisses his nose, his forehead. The floors ding by slowly, but Jack doesn't do more than kiss along his cheekbones, fingers smoothing little circles into his neck.

By the time the lift doors open again, Ralph is gasping, gripping at Jack's shirt.

'God, look at you, baby,' Jack whispers, leading him down the hall to his door, 'You’re so fucking hot when you're all riled up.' Jack pushes him into the apartment as soon as he opens it, and Ralph doesn't need him to turn on the lights to find his way to his bedroom.

 

And as soon as the bedroom lights go on, Jack's attitude changes. He grabs Ralph by the throat and pushes him up against the wall. Ralph spreads his legs in anticipation, and Jack notices immediately.

'Fuck, you're just a little goddamn slut, huh?' It takes Ralph one look to know how mean Jack will be tonight.

'Yes, Sir.' He breathes.

'God, you don't even fucking deny it. Desperate, are we?'

'Yes, Sir.'

'What do you want, baby?'

'Your cock, Sir.' Jack steps back, drags his thumb over his bottom lip.

'Beg,' He whispers, seemingly fascinated with the bitten, raw skin.

'Please - please, Sir. I'll do anything for you, I just want to make you happy. I wasn't thinking, and I was mad, but I want to show you how good I can be. I can be so good for you, I promise I can - you know how much I can do for you.' Jack rubs his thumb along his teeth, and he smiles.

'Tell me what you do for me. Because, from here, you just seem like a ungrateful whore. And you know what ungrateful whores get? They get fucked over a table, then get left without coming.' Ralph sobs, the sound dry and strained.

'I - you always tell me how well I suck your cock, Sir, remember how I sucked your cock all day? In your office? I made you happy then, right?'

'You weren't being a bratty slut then, baby.'

'A-and, when you tied me up, for your birthday. I didn't even complain once that I didn't come until later that night. And, whenever you need, I come over, I'm your - I'm yours. I'm always yours, I'm sorry I didn't - ' His breaths are quick and desperate, and Jack pushes his thumb into his mouth. Immediately, Ralph sucks at it, eyes round and wet when they find Ralph's.

'Breathe, princess,' He says softly, and Ralph could melt, 'This is for you, too. If you don't want me to be rough tonight, just say the word.'

'I need it,' Ralph mumbles around his thumb, and Jack nods, kissing his forehead sweetly. Then, he pushes his thumb against his tongue, two other fingers sliding into his mouth.

'Hm. Didn't really beg well enough, baby. Come on.' Jack grabs his wrist, even harder than he did outside the bar, dragging him across the room, clearing off his desk with one swipe of his arm. 'Get those goddamn trousers down.' Ralph's hands are shaking as he does as he's told, pulling his belt free and pushing his jeans down. Jack sighs impatiently and grabs him by the arms, steering him in front of him. He's pushed down to the desk, and his briefs are yanked down enough to expose him for Jack. He reaches and grabs for the lip of the desk when Jack swats at his ass.

'Don't do that, sweetness,' He murmurs, 'I'm gonna go hard, I don't want to catch your fingers between the desk and the wall.

'What do I hold onto?'

'Hands behind your back.' Jack's cold tone is back, and when he does so, his belt is looped around his wrists in a way that he could very easily get out of. 'Don't fucking move. I'm getting the lube.' Ralph nods, but turns his head to watch him. He's achingly hard, and his cock is trapped between the desk and his stomach. If he was in a ballsier mood, he would move his hips a little, try to get himself off. But he didn't need to be punished, per say - he just needed Jack to pound into him hard enough that he would remember it for the rest of the week.

Jack doesn't bother warming the lube before he's pouring it onto his entrance, barely prepping him before there's the jangle of his belt being opened and slide of his fly being unzipped. Some rustling and slick sounds, and a soft curse before Jack finally wraps his arm around his hips, other hand going to his shoulder. He pushes into him slowly, cursing again.

'Still so tight,' He mutters, 'Perfect - ' Ralph preens at probably the only praise he'll get tonight, grabbing for the belt. Jack is finally all the way into him, and the cold of his belt buckle is pressed to his thigh, his fly pressing to his rear. Jack stays still for a moment, sucking a mark to the back of his shoulder. He grabs his throat again, squeezing tightly.

'Mine,' He growls in his ear. 'Say it.'

'Yours,' Ralph gasps out, and Jack pulls all the way out, slamming back in forcefully. Ralph cries out and pushes his forehead to the desk.

'Again.'

'Yours, all yours - ' Ralph curses loudly as Jack repeats the same slam as before. 'Yours. Yours, yours, yours, yours - ' He repeats the word over and over until he's devolved into hoarse, breaking moans. Jack keeps the same even slamming rhythm until he stops saying anything, and then he adjusts his hold on him and simply jackhammers into him, the desk hitting the wall with every thrust, and Ralph understands why he didn't want him hanging onto the edge of the desk.

Before long, Jack reaches his limit. He pulls out, coming across Ralph's back. He slumps forward, wrapping his arms around him as he kisses his face.

'You didn't come in me,'

'I know. I'm sorry. I'll get you a towel.'

'Don't leave. Just use a shirt or something.'

'God, you're nasty. I'll be right back, okay? Get undressed, I want you in my bed after.'

'Yes, Sir,' Ralph murmurs thickly, hazy and strangely satisfied, although his cock still throbs insistently under him. He pushes his briefs and jeans off the rest of the way, then slumps down against the desk again, pushing his cheek against the cool wood.

Jack's fingers smooth over the small of his back, surprising him.

'You're so beautiful,' He whispers reverently, and a warm towel is wiped down his spine, Jack kissing as he cleans him up. 'Are you okay?'

'Hm?'

'That was intense. I wanted to make sure you were okay.'

'Yeah,' Ralph mumbles, looking back at him. 'I'm more than okay.'

'Okay.' Jack kisses his forehead, then stands. 'Come to bed, baby.' Ralph nods, shakily walking over to the bed and crawling in. Jack stands at the foot of the bed, pushing his jeans down, tucking himself back into his briefs, then pulling his shirt off.

'You're not gonna get naked?'

'Do I have to?'

'I'm naked. It's only fair.' Jack gives him a look, then pushes them down.

'You look good, sitting up in my bed. All fucked out. It's your best look so far - you should wear it more often.'

'God, shut up and come here, dumbass.' Ralph slides down to lie in bed, and Jack crawls in next to him, cradling the back of his head with one hand, rubbing his thumb over his ear.

'You didn't come. You up for that?'

'I thought I was being an ungrateful whore.'

'That was the scene, idiot.'

'I know.'

'So? You want me to - ?'

'Okay. Just your hand, though, I don't - ' Jack already closes his fingers around his cock.

'Fucking hell, you're actually, like - _throbbing_. Fuck - ' Jack looks down between them, then grins up at him. 'I did that to you. Fuck - you're so fucking hot.' He pulls him in for a kiss, licking into his mouth. It doesn't take much for Jack to bring Ralph over the edge, and Ralph lurches into him with a shuddering little gasp, coming over the back of his hand. Jack talks him down with a soft tone, running his fingers along his jaw. 'That was so good, babe,' He whispers, kissing his nose. Ralph gives him a sleepy smile, moving closer so his head rests on the same pillow.

'I think I love you,' He murmurs thickly, and Jack gives him a nervous smile, kissing his brow.

'I'll see you in the morning. Get some sleep.' He says gently, softly, and Ralph smiles back and him, wrapping his arms around his waist, pushing his face into his chest, and doing exactly as Jack asks him to.

 


	59. LIII.i

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> some super quick and innocent spin the bottle/awkward seven minutes in heaven because:  
> 1\. i write too much smut  
> 2\. i don’t write enough ralmon  
> 3\. i was reminiscing about ninth grade

Simon didn't really take the game seriously, at first. No one did. And then, Anna Miller spun the bottle. And it landed on Jake Flint. And their seven minutes in the closet extended to ten. Which extended to twenty.

And it all got a bit more serious then.

And sure, Simon doesn’t know what he’s doing. And sure, he’s never kissed anyone before. But he’s sixteen, and most of his friends have done much more than that by now, and he needed to just get it out of his way.

And sure, he’s a little bit jealous that, when Becca Davis spins it, and it lands Ralph, all her friends sigh dreamily.

But it was just a game.

 

Ralph squeezes his shoulder on his way to the closet, already on Becca Davis before the door is even opened.

And when he comes out, his hair is wild, and he's more relaxed than he was before.

'Alright. C'mon, give me someone hard to kiss, I want a challenge.' Ralph leans in, spins the empty beer bottle deftly, then leans back, giving a lazy smile. All the girls in the circle lean in, and the group as a whole holds their breath as it wobbles to a stop. Everyone follows the line of the neck of the bottle, and when all eyes are on Simon, he could burn up. In fact, he wishes he could.

'Y-you did ask for a challenge.' But Ralph isn’t even shocked. He stands, and crosses the circle.

'Nope. Easy peasy.' Ralph takes his hand, pulls him to his feet. Although he displays a calm, collected confidence, his palm slides slick over Simon's, and when the door shuts, he lets out a shaky breath.

'Fuck,' He says softly, squeezing Simon’s hand. 'I'm sorry about that. Hopefully you get someone good next turn, I want your first kiss to be good, bud.'

'You’re not - ?'

'Do you want - ?'

'I mean. You kissed Becca Davis.'

'I've seen Becca Davis' tits. It wasn’t hard.'

'Oh.' Ralph curses, hand sliding up his arm.

'Fuck, Si, I don't - fuck. It's not that I don’t want to kiss you, I do. I do. But you're my best friend, and it’ll get messy and I'll get clingy because I like you _so much_ , and I don’t want to scare you away because this is your first kiss, and I want that to be me _so bad_ , but I also don’t want it to be me, and - '

'You're babbling, Ralph. It’s no biggie.'

'It’s yes biggie!' Simon steps closer and stares up into the dark.

'Just kiss me, idiot.'

'No, you’re - you're Simon.'

'Then pretend I'm not.'

'Simon,' Ralph breathes, and his fingers brush over Simon's brow, 'Not like this. Not here.'

'What?'

'I don’t - I don’t want to do it like this. In a fucking _closet_ \- it’s all too literal, don’t you think?'

'Everyone knows I'm gay, Ralph, stop worrying.'

'I'm not talking about you.' Simon frowns and feels through the darkness for his hand.

'Ralph - ' He gets it. Back in ninth grade, before he finally figured out that not all boys stare longingly at the male leads in movies and want to kiss their friends, every time Ralph even looked at his then-girlfriend, there was a stab of jealousy in Simon’s stomach. At first, he had thought it was because he liked his girlfriend. And then he realized that he just liked him.

'I think I'm bi. No - I know I'm bi.' Simon squeezes his hand.

'Can I hug you? Is that okay?'

'Yeah,' Ralph’s voice is tight. Simon wraps his arms around his waist and pulls him in close, and Ralph slides his fingers through his hair, pushing at the back of his skull and guiding his head to his shoulder.

'I missed you. You haven’t really talked in a while.'

'I was afraid you would be able to tell, somehow. Gaydar.'

'That's not really a thing.'

'Maybe you just don’t have one then,' Ralph laughs softly in his ear, pushes his nose into his hair.

'Maybe.'

 

They fall into silence until there’s a knock on the door.

'Okay, homos,' It’s Sam, and there's a playful warmth in his tone, 'Put away the lube. Time's up.'

Simon moves to pull away, but Ralph’s arms tighten around his waist.

'I wish I could be your first kiss. But um. Maybe later, we could? Go somewhere nice? O-on, like, a date?' Simon smiles and nods.

'I'd like that.' Ralph lets him go, and reaches past him to open the door for him. Simon stops, looks back at him, then takes his hands again, holds them carefully. Then, he leans up and kisses his cheek, and then squeezes his hand. 'I'd really like that.'


	60. LIV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have,,, Severely neglected both Maurice and the twins so uh  
> some Maurice n Sam??? Wowzers

When Maurice first told Jack about his feelings for Sam, he had laughed at him. He still does.

'How do you know which is which?' Jack doesn’t smoke weed often, but he does tonight, a joint held loosely between two fingers. He glances over at Maurice in a way that he can only describe as _Jack_ \- almost fondly contemptuous. Ralph is sleeping in his lap, and Maurice looks down to watch him smooth his fingers through his hair.

'They’re not, like, mirror images of each other.' He says defensively, glancing up at the door. Sam and Eric were supposed to arrive half an hour ago, and while it wasn't out of character to be late, he's still antsy. Eager to change the subject, he looks back at Jack, shoulders lifting to his ears as he jabs his hand between the two on the couch, 'And do you really have to screw Gornick, man? He's the team captain, for God's sake.'

'You know he's my only weakness,' Jack gives him a lazy smirk, fingers drifting down his cheek, and Maurice scoffs in disgust, but knows it’s true. The two have broken up probably six times that semester alone, and Jack has probably fucked every pretty blond in London to get him out of his head, but they still somehow come back to each other after a few days apart. 'And they fuckin' are. Right goddamn Fred and George, yeah?'

'No, Sam’s - '

'Hotter? Better body? Not true.'

' - Nicer. And, I dunno, I guess I find him - more pleasing. But you know it’s not just about that with me.' Before Jack can answer, Eric marches in without knocking, dropping onto the couch beside Maurice.

And they look totally different, if you spend enough time really close to them. In the ninth grade, Sam got a nice ring, but stopped wearing it by Christmas break that year. There’s still a scar there, a little divot in his nose, which is larger than Eric’s. And his mouth is wider set, his eyes a different green. Not to mention the freckles - he wasn't covered in them like Jack, but there's a fair amount speckling his cheeks and nose, especially in summer months like this.

'Where’s your brother?'

'He’s going to Tesco to pick up some pop, as chasers. Dropped me here on the way.' Maurice nods slowly, and Jack leans over.

'How come you didn’t go? I'm sure Maurice would much prefer some face time with Sam.'

'No, I - ' But Eric just laughs, plucks the blunt from Jack's hand.

'I know you're into him. You aren't subtle.' He says, taking a long hit. He comes up coughing, then leans in. 'I dunno why, though - I'm the hotter twin.' Maurice’s face is on fire, and he reminds himself to give Jack a beating when he doesn’t have his rugby captain passed out in his lap. After a lengthy silence, Maurice stands abruptly, crossing the room as he looks back at the others.

'I'm gonna get the brownies from the fridge. This shit ain't enough.' He grumbles, and there’s a peal of laughter from the living room. That was the only thing that both Sam and Eric have the exact same of - although, it's more appealing from Sam. But that might just be bias.

 

'What the fuck is up, homos?' Sam calls loudly, toting two bags when he finally pushes into the house. Eric promptly stands and drops into an arm chair with a grin.

'Go help him, Maur. You’re the host.' Maurice casts them all a dirty look - even Ralph, who's doing nothing but blinking tiredly and kissing Jack's cheek and jaw several times. But he gets up regardless and takes a bag from Sam.

'Kitchen,' He says softly, and Sam smiles at him brightly.

'Yes ma'am.' Maurice gives him a look as he holds the kitchen door open for him, letting it drift shut after he comes in.

'So, what did you bring us?' Sam drops his bag on the counter and starts pulling out bottles.

'Smirnoff, obviously. Captain Morgan, Sour Puss because I know you secretly like it,' Maurice stops listening and doesn’t stop smiling, watching as he turns his attention to the other bag, pulling out off-brand sodas.

 

'Hey, Maur, you all good?' Sam says softly, waving his hand in front of his face. 

'Oh. Yeah.'

'I've just never seen you be this quiet.' Sam smiles again, and fuck does he want to kiss him.

'I've got a lot on my mind, I guess.'

'About what?' Sam hops up onto the counter and crosses his arms. He has a bad habit on sitting on furniture that he isn’t supposed to sit on, and it just makes Maurice want to kiss him even more. He reaches for the Sour Puss - raspberry, his favourite - and takes a deep gulp. Sam laughs and pulls the bottle from his hand, taking a sip himself. 'Spill, mister.'

What was Maurice supposed to say? _Hey, I know I've known you since we were six, but recently I've noticed that I jerk myself off to your Instagram page and I really want to kiss you and more right now, let’s fuck!_

'Exams are coming up,' He says lamely, and Sam snorts.

'Everyone knows you're, like, a genius. You have better grades than Piggy, for God's sake.’

'He got a 95 and I got a 96. It barely counts.'

'You don't need to lie to me. C'mon, Maur, it's me.' _Exactly_.

'I'm not lying.' Sam reaches for him, takes his hand. He pulls him close, and then runs his hand down his hair, pressing his fringe flat with a smile.

'You're a shit liar, Fleischmann. I know when you're lying. Out with it.'

'Why do you need to know so badly?' Sam blinks, then hops down from the counter. Maurice is by no means tall, but Sam still tilts his head to look at him.

'Because it’s bugging you. Because I want to know. Because you're my best friend, and - ' Maurice grabs his collar and pulls him into a hard kiss, and Sam squeaks in surprise, hands flying to his hair. He lifts onto the balls of his feet, and Maurice wraps his arms around him, turning to push him against the fridge.

Sam breaks the kiss and stares up at him, panting. He smiles, hands dropping to his shoulders.

'Finally. I’ve been waiting for you to do that for months.'

'You have?'

'Yeah. I know you like me, and I definitely know I like you. So. We should do it more. But that's just my opinion.' Maurice stares down at Sam incredulously, mouth agape. He searches for something to say, taking him in. His eyes are soft in the same way they were the time that Maurice first fell for him two summers ago, and Maurice can't help but wrap his arm around his waist, pulling him to his chest.

'Why didn't you tell me sooner?' He finally says, his voice soft and too vulnerable for his liking. Sam smiles, shrugs, and runs his fingers down the side of his neck.

'Why didn't _you_ tell _me_ sooner? It isn't all on me, y'know.' Maurice laughs nervously, pulling at his earlobe. 'But that's all in the past,' Sam says finally, palms pressing to either side of his waist, pulling him in, 'This is now. And we should stop talking. And you should kiss me again.' Maurice swallows and presses his thumb against his chin, index finger tucking under. He leans in, brushing his lips over his Cupid's bow. The floorboards beside them creak, and Maurice looks up sharply to see Eric watching them, bored.

'You're blocking the fridge.' He says, taking a hit from the blunt. Sam looks up calmly, frowns at his twin, then wraps his arms around Maurice's neck, pushing him forward, away from the fridge. Eric slips past them and bends down, digging through the shelves. 'And get a room, Jesus fuck. We can all hear you being all sappy and gross.' Sam rests his head on Maurice’s shoulder, and Eric straightens up, a cup of yogurt in his hand. He looks up at Maurice, claps him on the other shoulder. 'Have fun, you kids. Be safe.'

They wait for Eric to leave the kitchen, then Sam looks up at Maurice, his fingers sliding into his hair.

'We probably should go upstairs. To talk.' He says softly, and Maurice raises his brows.

'Just talk?' Sam clears his throat.

'Well, if we do more than talk, then we do more than talk.' Maurice smiles down at him, then draws away, taking his hand and guiding him down the hall, up the stairs.

 

Sam has been in his room before - days spent studying, or watching Netflix together, or sleeping on opposite ends of the bed. But never like this. And he’s never looked so nervous to sit down on his bed. Bouncing slightly, he looks up at Maurice expectantly, patting the space beside him when he doesn’t move.

'You're so cute,' Maurice whispers instead of joining him, pushing his hand through his hair. Sam leans into the touch, closing his eyes as he sighs happily.

'I try,' He jokes weakly, fingers curling around his wrist. He kisses his nails, then turns his hand over and kisses the middle of his palm. Maurice kneels in front of him, looking up into his face. He reaches up, presses his other hand against the back of his neck, and brings him down into a slow, careful kiss. Sam's hands roam over him almost immediately - going down his arms, up his waist, then under his shirt. He must like what he finds there, because he hums and edges closer, slides off the bed and into his lap.

'All that rugby sure is paying off,' He whispers, pulling back to push their foreheads together.

'Meh, it's not that great compared to some of the other guys.'

'Are you kidding? I could wash clothes on this shit. Take your shirt off?'

'Will you take yours off if I do?'

'Of course.' Sam says it like it's obvious, and he laughs at Maurice.

'What are we doing?' Maurice asks softly, rolling the hem of his shirt in his fists.

'What do you want us to do? I'm fine with snogging, I'm fine with shagging. The only thing I'm not fine with is going back downstairs and pretending like this didn't happen.'

'Fucking - I've liked you for months, Sammy. I would die before I ever let this go.' Maurice reaches out to run his fingers over the curve of Sam's ear. Sam smiles and leans in, kisses him.

'Good. So? What do you want?'

'Let's take things slow, yeah?' Maurice says softly, hating himself for it, because fucking hell does he just want to get his hands on him. But he knew it was too much, too soon. And he’s waited too long for it to just get fucked up. Sam just smiles wider and nods, kissing him briefly.

'Yeah. I was thinking the same thing, actually.'

'Okay. Good. Should we go back downstairs, then?' Maurice leans in, kisses his neck. Sam takes his hands, laces their fingers together.

'Do you really wanna do that?'

'Not really. You?'

'I think I'm good to stay up here a while longer.' Sam pulls back, and they smile at each other, albeit a little shyly still, then Sam slowly leans in.

 

When they finally come back downstairs, it's to a series of wolf whistles. Sam is smiling so wide that it has to hurt, and Maurice is mirroring that smile, unable to look away for him. He squeezes his hand, then leans in to push his nose against his jaw.

'I really like you,' He whispers. Sam turns to press his cheek to his.

'I figured.'

 


	61. LIII.ii

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> luv that short ralmon shit

It's been three weeks since that party, and Simon still hasn't been kissed.

Back at the party, when he spun the bottle, it landed on Lane Park, who looked between him and Ralph and then opted to take a drink instead. Simon is still thankful for it.

And while Ralph isn't exactly avoiding him, he isn't seeking him out, either. And he had reacted... strangely, when he found out that Charles had bailed on their plans after school last minute, and they wound up alone up in Simon's bedroom.

Simon watches him from the opposite end of the bed, taking in his body language. He's curled up against his pillows, and his arms are crossed over his chest. He's closed off, yes, but Simon doesn't think he's closed off from him - he's closed off from himself. Simon bites his lip, tucking his phone into his back pocket, and he edges closer, resting his hand on his socked foot.

'Ralph,' He says softly, and Ralph's eyes dart to him. He doesn't move, doesn't say anything, but he doesn't look away. 'Talk to me. What're you thinking about?'

'I - I'm trying not to think. You know me - always overthinking shit.'

'I do know you, and I know it helps to talk about it. So what're you not thinking about?' Ralph's arms lower so he holds onto his elbows, and he pulls his bottom lip into his mouth like he was trying to suck on it.

'I just - I dunno. It's all jumbled up in my head, and - ' Simon moves even closer, hand sliding up his shin, and Ralph's breath catches in a shaky sob, one hand pressing over his.

'Why haven't you kissed me yet?' He asks softly, turning his hand so he can thread their fingers together. 'We haven't even gone on that date yet.'

'Wh... Where would you want to go?' Ralph pulls his hand free, but quickly grabs Simon's wrist before he can react, pulling it into his lap. He traces circles and figure-eights into his palm, gaze trained on their hands. Simon moves closer still.

'It doesn’t matter to me, really. I just... I really wanna kiss you.'

'You aren't just some fuck for me!' He snaps, clearly frustrated. He grabs his hand and squeezes so hard that Simon recoils and gasps. Ralph curses and drops his hand like it burned, looking away again. 'Fuck - I - I just want to do right by you,' He says softly, and Simon rests his hand on his thigh, moving in.

'Ralph - '

'Okay? Because - because I've never had a serious relationship, and I never do it right because without everyone it’s just kiss, fuck and repeat for a couple of weeks until we get tired of one another. And I don’t want that with you because you’re - you're you. You're kind, and you're sweet, and you're so easy to just talk to about anything, and you're just - you're _Simon_. You're _my_ Simon. And I don't wanna - fuck that up by kissing you right off the bat, because I can never control myself, and I know I won’t be able to control myself with you because you're so _fucking_ hot - '

'You're rambling again, Ralph,' Simon says softly, 'Don't make such a big deal about it. I trust you.' He presses one hand to his cheek, turns his face towards him. 'I trust you.' He leans in slowly, giving Ralph plenty of time to pull away. He doesn't, and Simon kisses his nose, hand dropping his neck, and Ralph laughs nervously.

'Only you would kiss someone’s nose. That’s what I mean. God, I'm gonna fuck this up.'

'Shut up,' Simon kisses his Cupid's bow, taking his hand. Ralph’s other hand goes to the back of his neck, and their mouths are a breath apart.

'Tell me to stop. Tell me to fuck off. Tell me that - that you don't want me. That you just want to be friends, that you - '

'Just kiss me, dumbass.' Simon grabs his collar and pulls him in, pressing their lips together firmly.

It's by no means a magical first kiss, but damn does Ralph’s mouth feel nice against his. Simon moves closer, both hands moving to the sides of his face. Ralph grabs his hips and pulls him into his lap, breathing heavily through his nose. His tongue presses at Simon's lips, and Simon smiles, breaking away reluctantly.

'Slow down,' He whispers, and Ralph opens his eyes slowly. His brows are drawn together and when he looks up at Simon, he almost looks wounded.

'Fuck.' He whispers, voice breaking. Simon smiles again, brushing his hair from his eyes.

'Now I see what you were talking about. You really can't control yourself.' He teases, and Ralph laughs, pushing his forehead against his shoulder.

'That was really nice. Really, really nice. Any chance you want to do it again?'

'I thought you were taking it slow,' Simon teases softly, kisses his temple.

'Screw slow.' Ralph murmurs, grabs his waist and pulls him close. Simon leans back, brushes Ralph's hair from his face.

'You're the one who was making a big deal about it.' Ralph looks up at him, bites his lip. Simon laughs, then leans down and kisses the corner of his mouth. 'There's a new episode of Love Island. Wanna go watch it?' He asks softly. Ralph laughs, pushing his forehead against his chest. Then he nods, and lets go of him.

'Yeah. Alright. Let's go.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i might do some other parts to this bc i can do whatever the fuck i want so fuck you if you don't want me to


	62. LV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a request! sum ralmon sex on the island :-) (THEY R NOT 12!!!! DONT HAVE TIME FOR THAT SHIT)

Simon has taken to sleeping out under the stars, away from everyone else and under the cover of the jungle's bracken. It's quieter and cooler out here, and he liked the feeling of the fern under his back and the trees towering over him - the earth always seemed more alive here than it did back home.

'What're you doing out here?' Ralph's voice comes as a surprise, but Simon doesn't flinch. He opens his eyes, looks up at him, his outline shadowed against the starry sky. In reply, he moves over and pats the ground beside him, closing his eyes again. Ralph lies down next to him. Says his name softly.

'It’s beautiful here,' Simon says simply, looking at Ralph. 'You?'

'Uh - ' He laughs, looking up and rubbing the back of his neck. That laugh fills Simon's chest with warmth - it's been so long since he's seen Ralph smile, let alone laugh. ' - You're gonna laugh at me.'

'I'm the one lying in the middle of the woods.'

'I um - I'm gonna go take a bath. I've been taking them at night. It's cooler, and - quieter.'

'Why would I laugh at that?' Ralph clears his throat and shrugs. 'Do you want some company?' Simon half sits up and smiles up at him, and Ralph bites his lip, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

'Sure.' He says softly, then offers a hand. Simon takes it and pulls himself to his feet, then moves his hand up Ralph’s arm to squeezes his forearm. Ralph's breath catches, and he glances over his shoulder at him, leading him through the trees. Simon rushes so he can walk beside him, looking up at him with a smile. He hasn't let go of his arm yet. He doesn’t want to. Ralph smiles back, then reaches up and rests his hand on his. They slow to a stop, and Ralph turns to look down at him. 'Are you sure that you're fine with sleeping out here? You look tired.' He rubs his thumb under his eye. Simon nods.

'You look even worse,' He teases lightly, wrapping his fingers around his wrist. Ralph slides his fingers across his cheek, eyes dropping to his lips, and he wets his own lips with his tongue, then he looks down.

'Yeah. I really need to take a bath, huh?' He lets go of his face and steps back, then leads the way to the bathing pool.

Simon pauses at its edge, and doesn’t look back when he pulls off his shirt and pushes down his shorts, sliding into the cold water without a sound.

After a few moments, Ralph slides in next to him, and clears his throat.

'Thanks for the help with the shelters, by the way.' He says softly, and Simon turns to look at him, give him a smile.

'It’s no problem. I would’ve done it even if you didn’t ask me.'

'I know.' Ralph says softly, biting his lip. Simon can feel his smile turn quizzical as he moves closer to him. He’s about to ask what he meant, when Ralph continues. 'You’re just - kind like that. Too good for this place, anyways.'

'Well - people need somewhere to sleep.'

'Yeah. Not everyone is content with sleeping where the Beast prowls as you are,' Simon might just be imagining things, but Ralph’s fingers ghost over his waist, and he takes another step towards him, 'You know, I think you did too good of a job on those shelters not to sleep in one of them.' Ralph is whispering now, eyes intense in the poor light.

'You're the one who did most of the work.' Simon’s voice comes out hoarse and squeaky, and he swallows thickly, meeting Ralph's eyes evenly.

'Yeah, maybe.' Ralph laughs softly, and Simon wets his lips, lifting his chin to look up at him. After a pause, Ralph closes the space between them, placing a hand on the small of his back. 'I'd really like to kiss you.' He murmurs. His lids are lowered and his lips are parted slightly, and Simon thinks he looks so pretty like that, wishes that he could just look at that expression all day. But he can't leave Ralph hanging after saying something like that, and he really wants to kiss him, too.

'Okay.' Simon backs up against the edge of the pool with a nod, his arms going around his neck. Ralph smiles, a hand setting on his cheeks, and he leans in slow, kisses his nose first. Simon hums, fingers playing over the back of his neck, and he lifts his chin slightly. Ralph moves down to kiss his Cupid’s bow, then stops, lips brushing his top lip.

'I'd really like to do more than just kiss you.'

'Like what?' Simon opens his eyes and blinks up at him, already breathless. Ralph’s fingers curl against the small of his back as he pulls him in even closer.

'I’d like to kiss you here,' His free hand goes to Simon’s neck, then moves to his shoulder, 'And maybe leave a few marks. And I’d like to touch you here,' His hand drops to his rear, fingers brushing over the curse of his arse. Simon’s breath catches in his throat, 'Would you like that?'

'Yeah,' His voice feels sticky in his mouth when he speaks, mouth dry and eyes fixed on him, 'Anything... Anything else?' Ralph smiles, hand returning to his chin. He presses his thumb to the little groove under his bottom lip, and curls his index finger under his chin. He pushes their foreheads together, the hand that’s on his back moving to his hip.

'I'm sure I can figure something else out,' He pushes him harder against the edge of the pool, and Simon bends back a little, hands moving to cup his cheeks.

Finally, Ralph pulls him into a kiss, and it’s slow and careful. Simon can’t help but melt into him, it’s so sweet. When Ralph’s fingers curl under his jaw, he opens his mouth, letting Ralph slide his tongue over his teeth and over his own tongue. He works it over the roof of his mouth, and he giggles, one hand moving up to grip in his hair.

'You taste really good,' Ralph murmurs, breaking away to smile up at him, 'Why does your mouth taste so good? That shouldn’t be normal.' Simon shrugs, and Ralph leans in to bite at his ear. 'Guess you’re sweet all the way through.' It’s almost a growl, and Simon can’t help but shiver.

'That’s the corniest thing anyone’s ever said to me,' He whispers regardless, and Ralph smiles and kisses down his jaw. Both hands are on his waist now, hoisting him out of the pool to seat him on the edge. Simon wraps his legs around Ralph’s waist, and when his head drops to his chest, he holds him there, fingers playing through his soft blond hair. Ralph kisses a trail down his pulse, then licks at the dip of his collarbone. His teeth pull at the sensitive skin there, and Simon moans, fingers tightening in his hair. Ralph laughs into his skin, fingers tightening over his waist possessively.

'There it is.' He murmurs, and Simon shivers as his hand runs up his ribs, thumb rolling over a nipple, 'You’re so pretty, Simon. You’re so fucking - perfect. I've wanted to do this for so long.'

'Really?' Simon feels like he’s floating now - or like he’s about to float, and Ralph’s hands are the only thing keeping him tethered. Ralph hums in response, and then he sucks at the skin of his collarbone. Simon cries out, high and needy, pulling at his hair. Ralph pinches at his nipple experimentally, and he arches into his hand. He pushes his cheek against his hair and reaches down, grabbing his other hand and pushing it over his hardening cock.

'More,' He whispers, 'Need more.'

'You’re so receptive. I can't get enough of it.' He bends his head once again and sucks another mark into the other side of his collarbone, then he leans back, thumbs rubbing over the marks as he admires his work. Simon must look absolutely disheveled already - he feels it. But whatever Ralph sees, he must like. He returns to that slow, careful kiss, licking into his mouth again, and Simon hums happily. As good as the biting and touching felt, he knew that if he was just able to kiss Ralph for a while, he would be more than okay with it. Ralph’s mouth is soft and sure against his, his hands careful and guiding on his waist, his jaw. Simon moves into him with another hum, and Ralph pulls him in, nails dragging up his back, fingers curling into his hair.

'You're so fun to kiss,' Ralph murmurs as he takes a breath, playing with his ear, 'I could kiss you forever if I could.'

'I wouldn’t complain if you did.' Simon whispers before he moves back in, the kiss a little harder now. Ralph's hands are both in his hair, and he’s firmly wedged between his thighs now, and Simon manages to bite at his bottom lip. Ralph grunts in surprise, hands moving to his shoulders. He rubs his hands up and down his arms, head tilting and chin pushing forward. Simon kisses back a little harder, moves a little closer, pulls at his hair a little more. Ralph does this sweeping motion with his tongue over his bottom lip that drives him absolutely crazy, and Simon makes sure to let him know, slowly sliding back into the water.

'I've never been this hard in my life,' Ralph murmurs, and Simon must do something that pushes him over the edge, because he's breaking the kiss to kiss at his neck furiously, fingers pushing into his rear. Simon wraps his legs around him again, arms winding around his neck, and he whines when Ralph’s teeth press into his neck. 'You're gonna kill me, baby, I swear.'

'Fuck me,' Simon murmurs, kissing his ear. Ralph's fingers tighten over his rear.

'You sure?' He nods, kissing his jaw, then his cheek. Then, Simon pulls away, lifting out of the pool to lie back.

'I want you.' He murmurs, and Ralph swallows thickly. Rising onto his knees, he pops three of his fingers into his mouth, distractedly sucking on them as he pushes Simon's knees apart.

'It's gonna hurt a bit without lube. Are you sure you're sure?' Ralph wets his thumb, then rubs it over the puckered muscle of his entrance. Simon laughs at that, the sound strained as he lifts his hips into his touch, and he nods, eyes closing.

'Yes. I'm one hundred percent sure.' Ralph shivers and bites his lip. He leans down, kissing his knee.

'I need you to relax for me.' He rubs his abdomen soothingly as he slowly works him open with a fingertip. Simon keens, hand going to his shoulder. He tries his best, and Ralph presses his finger into him. 'That's it. That’s it. You're doing so good baby.' His voice is soft, and he kisses the inside of his thigh. His finger works past the ring of muscle, and it's much easier from there. Simon hums quietly when he bends his finger in him, closing his eyes and leaning back on his elbows.

'Fuck, Ralph,' He breathes, and Ralph presses on his abdomen.

'You alright?' Ralph murmurs, and Simon nods.

'Yeah. Feels good.'

'That’s good,' Simon isn’t looking at Ralph, but he can practically hear how big he’s smiling at him, 'That's really good.' After a few more moments of working the single finger in him, Ralph kisses the vein on the underside of his cock, making Simon gasp, his cock twitching against his hipbone. 'I'm gonna add another finger, okay?'

'Okay,' Simon barely gets it out before Ralph's mouth is around him, hot and wet and tight, and his finger is removed. He works two fingers in him, and Simon moans at the stretch, burying his fingers in Ralph's hair. He cries out, and Ralph stalls all his movement. Simon opens his eyes, finds Ralph's. 'Don't stop,' He chokes out, and Ralph smiles as best he can around him, starting to move again. The feeling of his two fingers, scissoring in him and bending up against his prostate has Simon panting, his hips pushing against his hand, hand moving to Ralph's neck. Ralph stretches his fingers as far apart as he can in him, and Simon cries out his name, screwing his eyes shut again.

'You fall apart so easily, it's so fucking hot,' Ralph's mouth is gone, and Simon whimpers weakly, pushing at the back of his head.

'Keep doing that,' He mumbles, and Ralph laughs, fingers twisting in him. His thumb pushes to his perineum, and Simon groans loudly.

'I don’t want you coming before I'm even in you.'

'You should be glad I didn’t come when we were snogging,' Simon manages, his voice hoarse. Ralph hums, kisses his hipbone. He makes that scissoring motion again, then pushes in further to press up against his prostate, and Simon sobs, pulling at his hair.

'One more finger, then you'll be ready. Okay? I'm gonna put another finger in.' Simon grunts in response, feeling as though he was floating again. Ralph keeps his fingers spread as he lines up his third finger, and it slides in with surprising ease. Once it's in, Simon reaches between his legs and grabs his wrist. Ralph stills, and they stare up each other. Simon rubs his thumb along the inside of his wrist, and Ralph reaches up, cups his cheek.

 

'I can't get enough of you like this - you're so fucking pretty, baby.' Ralph's thumb rubs over his cheekbone.

'Don't stop,' Simon breathes, closing his eyes. Ralph hums, kisses down his thigh and flexing his fingers. He presses his wrist up, pushing into him deeper, and Simon sobs. 'God, please don't stop.' Ralph sits back, pulling his fingers out enough to spit on them again, then presses back in, twisting his wrist slowly. He leaves another mark on the inside and Simon lets out a hiss of air through his teeth.

'You ready, babe?' Ralph says softly, and Simon nods eagerly, lifting his hips. Ralph sets his hand back on his abdomen and slowly eases his fingers out of him. Simon bites his lip and opens his eyes, looking up at him.

'I'm ready,' He breathes, and Ralph nods, then spits into the palm of his hand. Simon snorts and sits up on his elbows. 'And that is so unromantic.'

'It's not like I have anything else. Just wait - I'll make up for it.' He rubs his hand down the length of his cock, slicking himself up. Simon sits up more, pulling him into a hard kiss. Immediately, Ralph presses his tongue against his teeth, the head of his cock pressing flush to his entrance. Simon wraps his arms around his neck and lets him support all of his weight, opening his mouth and letting him do as he did when they first kissed - lick along his teeth, his tongue, pressing behind his teeth. This time, Simon tries to kiss back, prodding his tongue at his awkwardly. Ralph laughs into the kiss, grabbing at the back of his head. He eases into him slowly, breaking away to kiss over his face. Simon whimpers as he pushes in fully, nails digging into his upper back. 'Do you need me to stop?' He murmurs, and Simon nods.

'Just for a second.' His voice is tight and shaky.

'Okay. Do you want me out?'

'No. Just - don't move.' Ralph kisses his brow, then down the bridge of his nose, staying still like he asked. Simon shifts under him, then shifts again, then again. He presses his cheek against his neck and traces his nail over his back in nonsensical designs. 'Okay. You can move.'

'You sure?' Simon nods, and Ralph slowly rocks his hips forward. Simon groans, nails digging into his shoulder. 'Good?'

'Yeah. Really good.' Simon says tightly, heels digging into the small of his back. Ralph mouths down his jaw, sucking light marks along the skin, rocking into him carefully.

'You feel so good, Si,' He murmurs, nosing under his jaw. His hands go under his rear, and he carefully picks up the pace. Simon breathes his name, then curses loudly, surely drawing blood from how hard he's holding onto him.

'Can I touch myself?' He asks, and Ralph almost stops he's so surprised - by the tone of his voice, by the question. He kisses his neck, then pushes his forehead to his shoulder.

'Of course you can, baby boy.' He says softly, then reaches between them himself. One of Simon's hands lays over his, and Simon's breath is hot on his neck.

'Thank you.' Ralph smiles and kisses his shoulder.

'You didn't have to ask, you know.'

'I know. I wanted to.' Ralph groans at that, pushing into him harder now.

'God, how did I get so lucky?' Simon shrugs, then runs his hand up his arm. Ralph rocks into him hard, pushing his thumb against the head of his cock almost cruelly. Simon cries out, arching off and ground. Ralph leans down and mouths at his chest, tongue curling around his nipple, thumbing at the other one gently. Simon grabs his hair so tight that Ralph winces, but strokes him faster, mouthing under his pec. Simon moans, clinging to his head tightly. He whispers his name over and over, Ralph simply humming in response at each one, smiling as his voice hikes up higher. Simon tugs at his hair, hips pressing against his hand needily.

'I'm close,' He croaks, and Ralph smiles, biting at his chest, rubbing his thumb down his shaft.

'Come for me, baby, I wanna hear you.' Ralph sits up, stopping all movements other than the hand on his cock. Simon whines, pulling him down to push his face against his neck. Ralph kisses his temple, murmuring sweet nothings. Simon grabs his bicep, cursing under his breath. His hips buck up into his hand uncontrollably, and he cries louder than before as he spills over the back of his hand. As he comes down, his hips twitch slowly, and he drops back onto the ground, his chest heaving and his eyes distant.

'Bloody hell,' He laughs, and Ralph grins down at him, running his hand down his cheek.

'Good?' Simon nods loosely, reaching up to press his fingers to his lips. 'You good for me to keep going?'

'Yeah. You close?'

'Mhm.' Ralph presses a light kiss to his collarbone, slowly moving his hips again, 'Really close.'

'Want you to come on my chest,' Simon murmurs distantly, and Ralph smiles, kisses his pulse.

'Okay.' He pulls out slowly, then moves forward to pump his hand over himself. Simon watches him with a soft, pleased smile plastered crookedly on his face, reaching up to run his hand down his thigh. Ralph lurches forward and plants a hand on the ground to steady himself, groaning Simon's name as he comes across his chest and onto his chin, collapsing as soon as he does. Simon wraps his arms around his neck and kisses his cheek, and Ralph runs his hand down his back.

'You okay?' He asks gently, and Simon nods, kissing his cheek.

'Thank you,' He murmurs gently, and Ralph gently detaches himself away from him.

'Guess we should do what we actually came here to do before we head back, eh?' He wades deeper into the water, and Simon slides in to follow him.

'What, you didn't lure me out here to seduce me?'

'You're the one who asked if I wanted company.' Simon wraps his arms around his neck, and Ralph splashes water up onto his back to wash away the smudges of dirt left on his skin. He looking at him the same way that he was before they first kissed, but this time Simon has all the time in the world to look up at him.

'I think we should just go to bed.' Simon says quietly, running his fingers along his collarbone.

'Really? Why?'

'So I could kiss you some more, and you're not trying to move around as much are you are.' Ralph laughs, ducking his head to kiss a mark he left on his collarbone.

'Go get dressed then, I'll be out in a minute.'

 

They walk hand in hand back to the shelters, stopping at the mouth of one. Ralph leans in and kisses Simon gently, fingers lacing into his hair.

'I think,' He says into his mouth, 'That I love you.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have never devoted so much time to writing about two characters kissing but i had fun writing this one :’)

**Author's Note:**

> [request](http://gayjackmerridew.tumblr.com/ask) anything you want to see me write, and i'll see what i can do!


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